here's a plaque for your wall

ilya + diving in tongue first (￣^￣ )ゞ

How it feels to be violently reminded over and over again that the world hates women and men especially hate women in a way that is so cruel and heartless and genuinely evil

HUDSON WILLIAMS | Milan Fashion Week

Hudson Williams in Milan, Italy today (19 January) via florent.zmd

heated rivalry twitter (9/?) ft ilya's secret shane stan account

Hudson Williams at the Giorgio Armani fashion show in Milan, Italy

watching heated rivalry knowing it's getting a second season and connor storrie used to be a theatre clown in industrial films, had a septum ring and pierced nipples, and is trying to direct and release a low budget alien film with his yaoi dollars

can we get him out

ok i’m rewatching e5 and it’s really getting to me how painful shane’s closet is. like he has to be closeted i understand the logistics and his position. i get it. but he uses it against himself all the time. it’s so painful for him. having sex with women is humiliating & difficult but he thinks it’s necessary. keeping distance between himself and his loved ones is isolating but he thinks it’s necessary. having his emotional and sexual needs only barely satisfied for ten whole years is agony but he thinks it’s necessary. everything he does is calculated, everything he does is a fight to not be Too Obvious. being closeted is hard enough, but shane is torturing himself inside his. he punishes himself for being gay all the time. it’s almost like self harm. maybe if he’s a little harder on himself, maybe if he pushes until it hurts, maybe if he tries and tries and tries and just never accepts failure and just works really hard on it then it’ll be fine. he takes that approach to hockey and it works. maybe if it hurts for long enough, badly enough, then he will become a better man by enduring it. maybe it has to hurt for there to be a positive result. maybe the punishment is necessary. and the only person who can punish shane for this is shane himself. so he does. but every time he goes back to ilya it’s a failure, every time he can’t get hard with a woman it’s a failure, every time he thinks about maybe letting himself be what he knows he is it’s a failure. do you ever want to just cry

shane hollander understanders summit meeting in the tags:

i'm literally always saying perfectionism as self-harm#i can't make more posts about the show's choice to show shane having sex with my rose when it happens offscreen in the book#but suffice to say i am still thinking about it - @thepoisonroom

do you ever think about shane hollander and want to throw up from how bad hes hurting#“maybe it has to hurt for there to be a positive result” ouch#also very hockey of him#he was born to be and a bit shaped into the perfect canadian golden boy hockey player and i mean that in the most pitying way possible#my sweet sweet boy#one must imagine sisyphus happy#one must imagine shane hollander having a moment of quiet in his brain outside of sex - @creamsiclemelt

There’s Scott-closeted & then there’s Shane-closeted#There’s I’m not wrong but the sport I’ve dedicated my life to won’t accept me & there’s my sport is 100% correct & why don’t I fit - @ohmystarsoverhead

shane hollander shame thesis colloquium you better be ready

shane looking at ilya when ilya is putting his number in shane’s phone

requested by anonymous

Ilya's hand on Shane's knee 🥹

cannot stop rewatching the part where ilya recognizes miles and then scans the crowd like bisexual terminator

"I'm assuming your buddy's gay? Fucking brave for a dude to show up to a place like this and be like 'hey, here's me.' Russia is not safe for folks like that. Fucking balls of steel, man."

HUDSON WILLIAMS for DSQUARED2 | BTS

Is proper grammar 🍑