I can behave normally around books

I can be trusted in bookstores and libraries and you should take me to those locations

Your brain loves to rewrite your past with the knowledge you have now. This is called hindsight bias. It makes things look clear that were not clear at all when you were in the situation.

Hindsight can make everything feel like it was obvious. Patterns feel clearer. Red flags look brighter. But you did not have that clarity when you were in it. You were acting with the knowledge, feelings, and instincts you had at the time.

Even if someone warned you, even if part of you suspected something was wrong, the way you felt then mattered. Hope mattered. Fear mattered. Attachment mattered.

You were trying. You were surviving. You were not foolish for wanting things to work.

Be kinder to the version of you who did not know what you know now.

Be kinder to the

version of you who did not

know what you know now.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Fiction is fun! Where else can we enjoy red flags that would normally having us calling the cops? We love when unhinged characters can make us ignore their blaring warning signs and questionable actions in hope that they get their prey happy ending. So much delicious dopamine! 2025 was a great year for our psychos and added many to our list!

We had way too much fun while working on our Two Tropes and a Nope discussing the selection of our sweetest psychos to the most fatal. As we ranked them, we realized our "sweet but a psycho" characters deserved their own post! And with To My Shore wrapping up, we decided it was time for Fan Xiao and our other psychos to shine. We love us a good psycho, but it takes more than red flags to make it into psycho territory, ask Johan and Sorn. Here's our list of the ones we think have that special something.

🧁The Boy Next World

Fan ShuLang 🥰😏

heated rivalry + text posts // part one.

I don't know how Mok gets anything done in episode eight of Me and Thee because if I was witnessing the greatest love story unfolding the backseat between my rich boss and the kind guy he is obsessed with, I would have driven that car into a curb for being nosy.

But that's why Mok is the best bodyguard/assistant/friend/future brother-in-law because he is always focused on the family's reputation, especially since threats are coming from all sides now that Thee has something worth losing.

But, luckily, Thee is no longer losing his temper, and since Red Rascals are known for their anger and impulsive behavior, I'm impressed at the growth Thee exhibits in this episode. He might still be angry, but he isn't lashing out, and he is finding ways to calm down before jumping into action.

And because our Red Rascal is learning to balance his emotions with the good and the bad, he is encouraging others to do so as well.

Like his bodyguard/assistant/friend/future brother-in-law, who is drinking red wine to remember that one time Rome gave him some of his red wine as an indirect kiss and looking at Rome's Instagram for the picture of the birthday bracelet he made him and secretly snuck in his pocket.

Blue Boys are naturally calm and collected, but Thee wants Mok to remember that there is more to life than being grounded and always up for the task. He is a great assistant and an even better bodyguard. But he is also Thee's friend. And Thee wants Mok to be happy . . . and his brother-in-law. Thee wants Mok to think just as much about his own personal life as he does about Thee's professional life.

Because this episode is about balance. Or more like "White Balance" as it is appropriately titled.

White balance in photography asks us look at an image to see if it's too warm (red/orange) or too cool (blue/green) and make small adjusts to it until it looks natural, so in this episode, we get to see how the boys have adjusted their lives in small ways so neither the Red Rascal's spontaneous actions or Blue Boy's isolating tendencies overpower their interactions.

And a callback to the second episode is the perfect example. So Thee would feel more comfortable, Peach took off Thee's jacket and unbuttoned his shirt at the end of episode two when they went to a restaurant that Thee cleared out with his bodyguards, yet Thee felt exposed by the action. Now, in the midst of the boys trying to compromise on where to eat (Thee is fine eating out instead of in, but Peach makes it clear he can't buy the entire restaurant), they take a moment to sit outside while Peach loosens Thee's tie and unbuttons his shirt which Thee welcomes.

They are finding a good balance of caring for each other in ways that the other is comfortable with but they are also learning what to give in a relationship instead of holding fast to only the things they want.

Unlike some other Red Rascals Flags.

I know, Note! Shit's about to get good! The foil is finally foil-ing!

Aran is a Blue Boy in love with a Red Rascal.

But that Red Rascal doesn't know how to balance his emotions or compromise in a relationship, which is why he is alone in a small glass box of his really big emotions.

Thee still has big emotions, but he is constantly working on not making those emotions Peach's problem, especially at work. He will be the barrier between his man and the assistant who wants his man, but he also trusts Peach enough to know Peach is just a kind guy who wants to eat a chip (even though Thee could buy him at least six chip factories).

Tawan isn't on that elevated-Thee level. Tawan and Aran might be dressed for a balanced-themed photoshoot in their black and white, but Red Rascal Tawan is making his big emotions EVERYONE'S problem, especially the man he claims to love.

Thee isn't always sure what is the best way to care for Peach, but once Peach shows him, Thee remembers. And when Thee worries about Peach, Peach doesn't dismiss his concerns. Peach reassures Thee that Peach feels safe with Thee. Peach asks where Tawan is, and he believes Thee when he tell him. Thee warns Peach about Touch, and Peach believes him enough to allow his contract to be cancelled. It's not just balance between them and their dark blue, brown, and white colors here. It's trust.

And Tawan and Aran don't have that. Aran is happy Tawan is alive, but he is terrified of letting him back in. Tawan, with all his anger and hasty aggression, doesn't trust Aran, and Aran cannot trust that Tawan won't hurt him. They don't balance each other because Tawan is too red. He overpowers the blue.

But Thee doesn't want to overpower Thee. He wants a partner not another employee. And that's why he looks at Peach to confirm that it's okay to tell Plub they are dating before he nods. Peach said that he only cares about his sister knowing they are dating, and Thee took that to heart because what's important to Peach is important to him.

And Thee perfectly showcased that when he didn't argue with Plub about who loves Peach more. He let Plub have the last word. He stayed silent when Plub said she loved Peach more than him because unlike Tawan, he isn't competing with someone who Peach loves because Peach can love them both.

He also knows the more people who love Peach, the better Peach's life will be. Peach, like him, was a lonely kid, so Peach deserves this love, and as he said, Plub and him are better as a team for Peach rather than rivals against each other. Peach isn't someone to fight over, but rather someone to bring people together.

And that's why Peach welcomes being overpowered by Thee's red when no one is looking because not all red is anger or aggression, at least not Thee's. No. Thee's red is 💕love💕. Lots and lots of love.

Thee has proudly worn Peach's blue since the first moment he felt a tickle of love for Peach, and now that Peach has made their boyfriend status official by telling his sister, Thee is going to give Peach AND his sister his all.

Now that his love can be unleashed on a public level, and Thee can enlist his sister-in-law for backup, Thee will be unstoppable. Well, unless Peach tells him to stop; then, he will stop within three seconds because he isn't Tawan.

And Thee has no issue basking in the blue. In fact, he could live in the blue his whole life if Peach would just let him. Peach can overpower stay with him every day all day.

So even though I'm unsure if this room is blue or green, I do know the boys are in their natural state with each other. They can be vulnerable with each other because they make each other feel safe. They can speak to each and know they are heard. They can be their true selves with each other because they can be honest with each other.

When they look in the mirror, they see the best version of themselves because they are together, relaxed and happy.

Episode six ended with Peach and Thee kissing in Thee's red light, and episode seven ended with them in bed in Peach's blue light, but episode eight ends with a balance even though Peach is slightly higher because Thee is surrounded by the calmness and honesty of Peach's blue, but the love and passion in Thee's red is right there on Peach. So Peach can hear more of Thee's secrets while he bathes him, and Thee gets to hear his real name from a voice filled with love while Peach holds him.

To find this balance takes work, but for them, it just little adjustments along the way since a love like this is worth giving up some parts of their lives, like the burdens, the sadness, and the loneliness because at the end of a long day, what they gain is so much more.

It may just be the two of them in this moment, but that's all they need.

Yeah, i’m also living here: YiZhan, XingQiu, YunYi

The 10 Dance.

I bet young Ilya Rozanov never thought he’d get slapped in the face with that tism rizz and he would be so fucking cooked.

This man has eight of the same shirt and five of the same hoodie. This man memorizes hockey stats for fun. This man will have a cold ginger ale. This man will look awkwardly at the camera with a smile like he wants to incinerate himself in every wet t-shirt contest sports drink ad his mom books for him. This man will take everything you say absolutely literally. That’s French, Ilya. You just said a French word and we’re talking about Russian, are you unfamiliar with your own language. This man takes three days to recognize a social cue. And ten years to name an emotion. You’ll tell him you like him in the most roundabout way and you’ll think you NAILED it, and he’ll promptly have a panic attack on your dick. When he names that emotion finally? He’ll be absolutely relentless and will not stand down; he’s had an emotion and he knows you have one, too. By that point, there’s no escape. He’s imprinted on you and is starting to ovulate in your vicinity. He will bludgeon you with adorable nerd and insatiable ass. And his oral fixation is so mighty he’ll suck your remaining brain cells out through your dick.

This man drives a Range Rover because it’s good in the snow. This man does a loon call. This man will make you eight cheeseburgers. Buddy it’s over for you.

He was cooked from the moment he first shook his hand

Hamlet adaptation where Hamlet is a vlogger and all his soliloquies are breakdowns he uploads to YouTube

… I am unironically here for this

this is the funniest thing I’ve ever seen in my life

This is - legitimately - my favourite delivery of Shakespeare I have EVER seen (and I have seen some good-ass productions yo, in the Globe Theatre itself even). Like seriously, even though the words are unchanged, he’s stripped away ALL of the archaic pretense and assumed grandeur of ~presenting the bard~ that makes even the most wildly talented of actors and innovative of productions inherently inaccessible to a modern audience. Like, they’re still great, they can still communicate the message and (some) of the nuance, but they’re still always a step removed from being identifiable to any viewer’s lived experience. They’re still always reciting 15th century poetry. But this guy? This guy is like, screw iambic pentameter, to hell with being precious about the material, HOW WOULD AN ACTUAL PERSON SAY THIS SHIT?

Like this. And it’s beautiful. It’s beautiful to hear a soliloquy I loved so much already, and have it come to life in a way it never, ever, did before. I feel like I grasp his motivations, his twists and turns, no longer on an academic level but on a visceral, instinctive one. Because he’s presenting his mental and emotional journey in a way that speaks honestly, like a real person.

So yeah, this shit post? I love it. Deeply and sincerely.

an absolutely stunning interpretation

i find @kabesattic’s comment interesting, because i have always had directors who insist on doing this: thinking about the literal words you are saying, and saying them like a person. not a fancy shakespearean actor, but a person, feeling feelings that still apply today.

(my director right now made a point on day 1 that shakespeare theater culture had too much elitism and he said if you think you’re better because you know more about shakespeare, you can get out of my theater. he said no poetry. no meter. say the words as a person, as an actor, and let the rhythm of the syllables carry the flow.)

what’s so interesting about the vlogger interpretation is that it is exactly how shakespeare was meant to be performed, but in a modern format. im sure most people on theater adjacent tumblr have been to performances or seen anecdotes about shakespearean actors engaging with the audience. isn’t vlogging a good modern equivalent?

hamlet, finally separated from his family, pulling out his phone or his webcam and starting a live stream. just narrates all his angsty emo shit into the void of the internet, instead of the void of the theater. really getting the sense of “isn’t this shit absolutely crazy”

the audience is involved to some degree–they can’t change the course of the story, of course, but they can make their voices heard to the actor [through comments in this case rather than literally responding].

(i am partial to a teenage emo “nobody understands me” hamlet rather than an older actor, but this guy understands the flow and meaning so well i cant complain too much).

the society that separates its gamers from its scholars will have its gaming done by fools and its thinking by noobs

losing my MIND over the fact that Ilya probably thinks he's actually helping when they go to Shane's parents' house.

They get there and Shane is like "Ilya and I are, uh..." and Ilya is like "hmm we haven't talked about this but I know Shane is really uncomfortable right now, so I will shout out the one (1) english word I know that describes this situation. LOVERS."

Then they're talking about how long they've been together and Shane is like "since our rookie season" and Ilya is like "well, hold on now, you said you don't like lying to your parents, so let's be very clear about when this started. We have to be so clear about the fact that it started the summer before our rookie season. Wait, would it make you feel better if I give your parents the exact date and time of our first hookup?"

And then Yuna is like "you've been in love that long?" and Ilya is like "I need you to understand I've been drilling your son into mattresses from here to Florida for the last decade, but I can't say that because I want you to be my mother in law, so are you picking up what I'm putting down?" and Shane is like ILYA and Ilya is like "I am ANSWERING MY MOTHER IN LAW'S QUESTIONS"

And then he drinks his vodka and eats his pasta in his Boston shirt, very proud of himself for being sooooo supportive, meanwhile Shane is actively praying for a black hole to swallow him up

Behold dear mutuals, and non-mutuals. This is my little late Christmas present for you all. It’s been around 1.5 years I have entered the world of BLs and never once looked back. This is a little map of recommendations of sorts for people new to this media. It’s completely based off vibes rather than specific plots and tropes, I did not feel like revealing too much information about the shows. It mostly links the vibes of one of the western shows you may have followed and gives you an inventory of many BLs that you may enjoy. I could bet money on the fact you may end up loving most of these shows MORE than the original reference, but we shall see.

This is not to say I am comparing the two in a sense that BLs need to connect and relate to western media to be consumed, but I have found a profound lack of people trying to give this side a chance (most being my beloved spn family) and thought to create something that may help bridge the gap.

Of course, the seasoned BL watchers are also welcome to check out the recs and yap with me. And give me more recs!!

Better quality and editable versions below:

PDF LINK:

GOODNOTES LINK:

DISCLAIMER: the shows I have highlighted here just show a few interesting examples of that “vibe”, I don’t necessarily claim they are the best ones or that I personally love and recommend all of them (the ones I love the best are ofc marked with a heart hehe). Point is, don’t come and fight me on what goes where, this is a lighthearted passion project and doesn’t need serious tight boundary definitions.

I am attaching a free pdf as well as Goodnotes links, so you can edit and share this map as much as you want as long as you mention and give me credit for the origins. Let’s please have fun with this, MAKE LOVE NOT WAR :)

This was kind of inspired by the very famous “them gay shows” chart by the dearest @uweiy . I hope you like it senpai <3

Anywhoo, I LOVED making this. And I would like to yap a bit more about my favourites here hehehe. The rest of them, do your own research.

(very looooooooong post coming down don't get jumpscared)