ilya: i didn’t set up an ad campaign with the two of us together, call you pretty, tease you in the shower, and then almost get caught by your mom in the elevator for you to get our anniversary wrong. since summer before, shane
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everyone in the league calling ilya an asshole meanwhile he’s apologizing to the bartender for his rowdy teammates, smiling politely at the nurse, playing mermaids with the kids, painting hayden’s kid’s nails and then his own nails to show them that boys can paint their nails too, getting excited over the team puppy, and then spoiling his dog rotten when he finally gets one. sorry but idgaf that he’s mean to grown ass men, they deserve it 😭😭
- as SOON as jessie didn’t walk through the door you could feel the mood change. but also she was too locked in on stephen it had to be one or the other.
- once again is it too much to ask to give matt some turret time?
- love that they didn’t recycle the chess mission for a third time and instead made it ever so slightly different.
- but seeing everyone in the boxes try to put their heads to the walls with all the spooky sound effects playing really made it look like they were gonna clock the traitors.
- glad they do the dinner because at a certain point in the series i need to be kept in check and reminded that people are only annoying because they’re playing the game.
- stephen’s outfit once again had me gagged. if you need another queer scottish person to idolise just put me on the next season.
- i feel like rachel would be a good choice for the double vote because she could defend it by saying the traitors might view her as being confidently wrong.
- also obsessed with her stirring shit at breakfast just for the love of the game.
- maybe it’s a good thing jessie was murdered this episode because if she was at the table for the ellie/ross reveal i fear we would have lost her.
- can’t tell if rachel’s “don’t cry” to ellie at the round table was supposed to be comforting or like some kind of spell/manifestation.
Okay breaking down Ilya’s monologue/scene before because I was too locked in while watching the first time:
“Ok. Not good. Probably bad.”
I think even after everything, even after his initial breakdown in front of Shane, he’s still trying to hide. There’s a pause between each sentence, like maybe he’s going to leave things there, but he just…can’t with Shane. He’s openly honest with him even against his better judgement.
“I wish that he could know me.”
Ilya’s fears when it comes to coming out are much more complex than Shane’s. For Shane, he doesn’t want to lose what he has (mostly his career), and he doesn’t want people to view him differently, but for Ilya, he does want to be open and honest about who he is, but he literally can’t. Everything real about him is a secret to his family, and even if he hates them, a part of him still wants his family to really know him.
“I never want to come back here again. I fucking hate it here.”
Right out of the gate, we’re hit with something that we all probably assumed, but never expected to hear Ilya say. So much of his life has revolved around duty. To his family, to his country, to his team. He plays up the playboy and the give no fucks attitude, but in many ways he’s even more leashed than Shane is.
