Help I’m Lost

I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.

reasons.

an incomplete collection of tweets i consider to be short poems

I needed to see this gifset today..

fucking amen

W’Kabi: Would you kill me my love?

Okoye:

Straight men who always joke about hating their girlfriend are so fucking weird like imagine having a girlfriend and not treasuring and loving her every day smh grow up

“treasuring” and “loving” your girlfriend will result in her quickly leave you. Girls HATE guys who treat them like goddesses. They view it as pathetic and weak.

I hate it when people say shit like this like we get it you’re an

yall hurt him so bad he deleted his Manchild Manifesto

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what the fuck. theres not even a fucking joke here. its just the fucking alphabet. i was expecting some kind of fucking meme like “gun” or “john cena” or something like that but no its just the fucking alphabet. here. on tumblr.com. 26 users just fucking banded together to write the alphabet. what the fuck, man.

I think the update broke them, and almost everyone else.

69  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

72 …..why not….making the best out of this sad situation

73… I got so angry at this post I had to reblog it and continue

89 ;/

100

133 when will it stop?… never

138….also it’s missing 51 and that’s making me cringe.

140 … I have the strong feeling I’ve reblogged this before but whatever

150... I wanna see in like a month where this is at

I’m a little bit more than upset at my DNA tbh

french recipes: if you’re not making this in paris then what’s the point. fuck you

italian recipes: use the left leg meat of a pig from one of three farms in this specific area of tuscany, or from this day my grandmother will begin manifesting physically in your house

american recipes: buy these three cans of stuff and put them in a pan congrats you cooked

chinese recipes, as handed down from mother to child: season it with a pinch of this and some of that. you want to know the exact amount? feel it in your heart. ask the stars. yell into the void. 

English recipes: boil and salt it. Okay that’s it enjoy

Greek recipes: You followed all the right steps but this isn’t quite right. I don’t know what to tell you.

Australia recipes: chuck it on the barbie

Latinx recipes: you will never make it better than your abuela, face the facts

Armenian recipes: spend eight days laboring over the stove. the food will be flavorful with the sacrifice of your sanity. no one will appreciate it.

Canadian recipes: It either needs more bacon, more maple syrup, more gravy, or an unholy combination of the three

Polish recipes: you have to toUCH THE DOUGH, FEEL THE PIEROGI IN YOUR HEART, TOUCH IT. LICK IT. SMELL IT.

Every time I see this post, I learn more about how different countries’ cuisines AND neuroses.

Indian recipes: there are 500 cuisines and that means 500 versions of this dish that has 500 spices so gl 

ashki jewish recipes: no, no. no. more onion. 

internet recipes: here is a heartwarming story about my baby sister’s third birthday that i completely made up, and a copypaste from alton brown.

Irish recipes:

source

Avengers: Ok We’ve got 24 hours to stop this bozo that just wiped out half of the entire universe…

Reblogging cuz hades screens are on point

Peter Parker, also known as the popular superhero ‘Spiderman’, is roughly 16-17 years old, meaning he was born in either 2001 or 2002. Contrary to popular belief, this place him firmly in the ‘Gen Z’ category, rather than the millennial category that many place him in. By extrapolating this information, we can conclude that Peter Parker not only knows what a furry is, but constantly has to grapple with the fact that his spider-centric identity is, in fact, his fursona. In this essay I will-

you ever just sit and realise u can’t remember 80% of your childhood? like … what happened? who am i ..?

Peter teaching Thor what Yeet means and Thor proceeding to shout YEET every time he throws his hammer