FBA owned by
BuckHopper, characters by their respective owners.
************
To lose against another FBA team was bad enough. To lose against another Canadian team, and badly at that, stung even worse. There may be some consolation that the loss was against the Winnipeg Voyageurs, one of the best teams in the Western Conference, and the FBA as a whole rather, but that didn't soothe the minds of the Edmonton Totems team as they wearily climbed into their team bus near the business exits of Riverside Arena.
"That dog was all over the court..." Rocky Caracal (Lynx, G) muttered, referring to Winnipeg's best player of the game Zoie Wilds (African Hunting Dog, G) that scored thirty points and ripped thirteen steals away from the Totems' butterfingered paws. Some of his teammates overheard him, responding with either nods of agreement or snerks.
"We lost focus... we hurt ourselves, and all Winnipeg did was pick up our pieces and throw the shards back at us," Stan Shields (grey wolf, HC) replied and dropped his bag into the luggage compartment of the bus with not-subtle hints of disappointment. "Time to move on though. Fly back home and face the Spectrums in a few days. With the season coming to a close soon, we need all the wins we can get to have at most a #6 seed in the playoffs."
Lenny Hicks (Coydog, F) snorts softly. "We really need to wake up, people. We're in a slump, have been over the past couple games, and the last thing we need is a long losing streak right into the playoffs."
Of all the players climbing into the bus, Narkissa Kassius (Lemur, G) was among the silent ones. To the casual observer, that may strike them as odd as Narkissa has a very active tweeter account and was somewhat notorious for opening her mouth about what she felt was 'undeserved' treatment from the Spokane Rapids. Likely she opened her mouth too much as she ended up traded to the Totems, and while she missed her old teammates, she couldn't help but to be amused with glee when the Totems came against the Rapids a while ago and won. Her teammates still joke about the awkward moment during that game when she passed the ball to a former teammate, causing the turnover. With the musings of the team crowded out by VNV Nation music blaring into her ears via her beloved Cowon S9 device, Narkissa picked a seat near the center of the bus and slumped her forehead against the window glass.
Too content with the singing voice of Ronan Harris, Narkissa didn't even register a response when Victoria Ling (Panda, F) flicked a finger across one of the lemur's ears. When she flicked her ear again, Narkissa finally grunted and pulled the bud out of her ear before turning her head to look back at Victoria sitting behind her.
"What?" Narkissa replied to her teammate that (ironically) was also a Spokane Rapid earlier in the season.
Victoria chuckled. "You look rather down for someone that didn't play tonight."
"Pfft, that's the point. I didn't play," Narkissa replied with a deadpan tone.
"As if it'll make much of a difference, Haniel," Victoria replied using Narkissa's angelic nickname. "Sorry girl, but you're not torching the court on fire and Winnipeg's just too tough."
"You've heard me bitch when we were both in Spokane. You should know how I feel about that sort of thing."
"You can't be a starter right out of college and be the next superstar for the FBA. You have to work hard, and that can take years. Believe me... I know," Victoria said with tints of begrudging admittance. "Quit acting like you have something to prove to everyone. You're in the FBA, you know how many people wanted to be in the FBA and failed to even be drafted?"
Narkissa grunted and was tempted to put the earbud back on, but didn't want to come off as rude. "Yeah well, you don't have a parent that--"
Victoria glares back at her and reached a paw over the seat 'barrier' between them to forcefully cover Narkissa's muzzle. "I seriously don't want to hear more about your father again, Narkissa. I mean seriously, that's been bothering you all season."
The lemur grabbed her paw and pried it off her muzzle. "And you don't know why?"
"Of course I know why," Victoria said and leaned back on her seat. "You've explained it to us constantly... I like you but you can be a broken record sometimes."
Narkissa sighed. "I know... I'm sorry--"
"Hey Narkissa!" The voice of Mark Ferramin (Ferret, C) snapped her attention to him, but his pointing gesture to someone outside of the bus alerted her to gaze in that direction and she muttered a profane word. Roughly pulling the other earbud off, she stuffed the wires into her pockets and stood up, her mood quickly souring even more. Ignoring the other teammates and coaches, she hurried down the bus aisle like an angel of fury, bumping against the others as they found their seats and ignoring their complaints.
"Kassius! We have a plane to catch!" Her head coach barked out, but it fell on selectively-deaf lemur ears.
Narkissa stormed out of the bus, immediately approaching the source of her anger waiting by one of the stadium exit doorways. "What the hell are you doing here?"
The male ringtail lemur simply rolled his eyes, brushing a paw back along his greying hair. "I've always known you to be feisty but is that really a good way of greeting your father?"
Narkissa clenched her jaws, her paws curling into fists. She stood before him, looking up to see his face, something she had done her entire life with him. After a few moments of self-calming silence, she sucks in a deep breath. "How... did you get here?"
William Kassius leaned against the outside wall of the arena, paws into his jacket pockets. "I knew a few buddies that worked in this place. They owed me a few favors so they pulled some corners and gave me an access pass."
"Go back home..."
William shook his head. "Back to Arizona? Not until I have a talk with you."
Narkissa growled. "Follow me to Edmonton, I have an apartment." She rudely turned her back at him and took a step toward the bus when William suddenly grabbed her shoulder to force her to turn to him again. Narkissa roughly slapped the hold off of her.
"Here is just as good as anywhere else," William replied with a glare. "The bus can wait a few more minutes, it still has staff putting in the luggage. Please, Kissa... just a few minutes?"
She brushed back her red hair, letting out a sigh as she crossed her arms. "Five minutes and then I'm going back into the bus and you go straight back to Arizona."
William could only flinch at her behavior. Has their relationship been strained this much? Taking a moment to recollect his wits, the old lemur cleared his throat. "I know that... I haven't been much of a father to you, especially when coming to terms with this... sport."
Narkisa quickly scoffed but allowed him to continue on, even signaling with a wave to back her coaches off for the time being when they started to approach them.
"But I'm still your father, and lately I've been seeing how... distant we've become. Remember back in Spokane when your family showed up to your place for Thanksgiving? We shared the dinner table together but you still barely spoke to me."
"What do you want?" Narkissa retorted, massaging her forehead.
"I want to know why you're behaving like this to your own father."
The words stung her, even to the point of physically grimacing in response before looking back at his eyes. "You want to know why? After all this time, for many years, you still don't get it? There's a big reason why I took up basketball back in high school, Daddy... it's because I love the game and because... I hated how you spat on it. So I played in spite of you."
William blinked and shook his head. "I know you've done it out of rebelling against me but you took it too far when you played all the way to college, and crossed the line when you decided to enter the FBA draft! You could have been a great geologist!"
Narkissa hissed and unzipped her jacket, pulling it off and tossed it straight onto the ground. The sound of her music device tucked in the pockets breaking did give her some pause, but she dismissed it for now as she glared back at her father. "Goddamnit! You could have pulled your head out of your ass and supported me! Yeah, I know that you think the FBA screwed you and the media screwed you by overhyping you when you were picked third overall in the Draft. For my ENTIRE LIFE, I listened to you bitch and moan about the FBA, and I had to listen to bullies tormenting me in elementary school saying how much you sucked!"
Even the arena employees started to back away from them at this point, and William's face slowly distorted into an expression of sheer cold fury. It was an expression that Narkissa learned from a very young age to never provoke him to that point, but for once, she refused to back off. His fists clenched the insides of his pockets tightly, tearing the fabric with the claws. "Look at yourself... traded during your rookie season? Even I didn't have to go through that embarrassment, Kissa. You barely play on the court, and when you do, you weren't ever... impressive. Missing shots, getting turnovers..."
Narkissa clenched her eyes shut, her voice starting in a whisper and progressively increases in volume. "Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up!" She opened her eyes, moist with tears. "You never attended my games, never taught me one single BIT about basketball, and according to Mom, you even turned off the television whenever Mom tried to watch me in the FBA! People think that I'm going crazy because of you, Dad! Going in-friggin'-sane!" Her body motions became more animated, arms flailing wide and ringtail fizzled out to almost twice its normal size. "Maybe I am going nuts!"
William barely registered an emotional response, watching her clench her hair tightly as she briskly paced in front of him. His eyes finally gaze over at the bus, seeing many more eyes looking back at him. "Your entire team's watching. Calm down."
Her daughter snapped her attention back at him, finally frozen in her motions but that only lasted a few seconds. "You... don't care about me, do you?"
"Of course I care about you, Narkissa. You're my daughter!"
"You... don't care." Her low tone of voice barely carried above the rumbling of the bus engine nearby, but William clearly heard her. "Ever since high school, I wanted to be in the FBA..."
"And look where it got you," William interrupted, frowning. "The FBA will corrupt you just as it did to me. It tore apart my dreams, chewed on me and spat me out, hanging me out to dry at the end."
"You did it to yourself..."
William thought he heard her correctly but didn't want to know that came from his own daughter's mouth. He tilts his head forward, ears perked. "What did you say?"
"You did it to yourself..." Narkissa repeated, louder with a growl. "You believed your own hype, and when you were regulated to the bench and go into inactive status, you couldn't handle it... and when your contract ended, you refused an extension by your first team thinking you were more valuable and waited for another team to pick you up... and it never happened. You did it to yourself, Daddy... you and your friggin' ego-"
Narkissa should have seen his paw pull out of his pocket and spring itself back, but she didn't and the slap across her face shocked her into silence. Her head snapped to the side and she leaned away, blinking as one of her paws slowly reaches up to rest against her cheek. It was the very first time in her life that he had slapped her, and the first time he did any abuse of the sort toward her. Even William shuddered at the realization of what he had done, his paw shivering. A uproar of shock and disgust came out from the bus' inhabitants, and some of Narkissa's teammates start filing out as they face them from a short distance.
"Can't you see what they're doing to you, Narkissa?" William finally broke the silence after the slap. "The FBA is breaking us apart... please leave this sport. Please... go back to Arizona and be what you've been wanting to do since you were my little girl, as a geologist. Staying on this team and playing this satanic sport is only going to make you worse. Don't make the same mistakes I had made..."
"You get the hell out!" Victoria yelled out from the bus doorway, but Narkissa glanced back at her team and again waved her paw silently to hold them back. She rubbed her cheek once more before her paws relax back at her sides, and she bent down to pick up her jacket. A flood of thoughts crossed her mind and finally she shook her head.
"I'm becoming just like you, Dad... I've realized that just now. Becoming just like you..."
William's mouth opened but nothing came out. Narkissa clutched her jacket tightly and turned her face toward him, her sore cheek moist with her tears. "I had a big ego coming into the FBA... sure I wasn't drafted third like you, but I had an ego. I wanted to prove myself that I'm a great player, unlike you, and I wanted to show you that... basketball ain't all that... bad." She chuckled, half-delirious. "And when I stayed on the bench for game after game, I couldn't handle it, just like you. I upset my teammates, I distracted them with my bitching, and I angered management back in Spokane with my stupid mouth. I beaten myself up, taking every single missed shot personally, recycling every bad moment I had on the court over and over in my head until they refused to go away. I wanted to step out of your damn shadow... and all this time, I was curling myself deeper into it."
William's eyes brighten slightly, having a hope that finally... finally, she would wake up and leave the FBA forever, believing it to be a source of her eternal torment. "There's still a chance to get out of it. Just quit and start a new life. There's nothing wrong with that..."
The female lemur's fangs flashed under the lights of the arena for a moment, and with her whole body shaking visibly, she stepped in close to her father's face. "No. No. You know what, Dad? William? I'm tired of this crap. I'm tired of trying to prove to you about anything. I'm tired of being in your shadow, I'm tired of stupid reporters asking me about how I feel about you being a FBA draft bust, I'm tired of everything. But most of all... I'm tired of you. Sick and tired of you."
William let out an incoherent mutter of words incredulously. "What?! Now you're acting crazy, Narkissa... come on! Wake the hell up! Get out of your ass and understand that all that I've done for you, including trying to get you out of this basketball crap for years, was done for your best interests! But you never once listened to me and here you are in this muck and yelling at me saying I'm not your daughter anymore! Wake up, I'm trying to get you out of this nightmare!"
Narkissa gritted her fangs and turned away from him, walking back toward her bus.
"Kissa! Kissa, where are you going? I love you..."
Her steps slowed to a stop, even as her teammates started to part way waiting for her to enter the bus. She watched her teammates just as they watch her back silently, and for a long tense moment, only the sound of the bus engine provided the monotone melody to entertain their ears. She wiped her tears off her cheeks and sniffed, slowly pivoting on her feet to face her father again. A figure that she once looked up to while growing up. A figure that for many years, even up to this point, she tried desperately to win his love. Where is she going, exactly? Back to her team and end up going through the same disappointing motions, disappointing her teammates and herself? Or back into the arms of her father, quitting the FBA for good and becoming a geologist like a good Daddy's girl? Both directions look gloom to her. Stay in the FBA and continue to be in her father's shadow, never reaching her dreams of becoming a better player than her father ever was? Or quit and regret that decision for the rest of her life, studying dirt to earn a paycheck?
If you reach a fork with two paths that hold nothing but hell for you, what should you do?
When she walked slowly back toward her father, some of the members of the team grimaced in disappointment and sorrow, thinking she made a horrid mistake of leaving the FBA because her father said so. To some, knowing about her 'Daddy Issues', they thought this was inevitable. But instead she plucked her broken music device out of her jacket's pockets and handed the jacket, bearing the Edmonton Totems colors and logo, to him. Speechless, William accepted the jacket and simply gazed down at it.
"This is my team jacket... even got my last name and the number 11 on it. See there?" Narkissa pointed them out to him. "When you go back home, give this to Mom... but if you want to burn it, you can."
William looked back at her. "... What?"
"For years, I thought I was in a shadow you created, when all along that shadow was something I made. I've realized that now... William, you want to believe that the FBA is corrupt and the source of our breakup? Go ahead... believe all you like. But if you want to know the truth... if you want to know who or what really is the corrupt source of our breakup... look yourself in the mirror. If you want to burn this jacket, go ahead. But if you do that, you burn the very last thing you will see of me in person."
"Narkissa..."
She shook her head. "I'm going to move to a new place in Edmonton, and you will not know the address. I'm going to change my phone number too. Do not try to look for me. If you try to call me anyway, I will not answer. Let me go, for I've decided to let you go. And tell Mom that I'm sorry."
With those words, she turned and finally walked out of her father's shadow for good. Her teammates watched as she climbed into the team bus, leaving behind an old male lemur weakly holding her jacket. Silently the rest of the team followed suit, finding their seats as they prepare to leave for the airport. Narkissa slumped back on her own seat, glancing at her broken music device and feeling a crack on the panel along with a finger.
"Hey, you gonna be alright?" Victoria said as she sat next to her.
Narkissa nodded, her ringtail coiling around herself slowly as she often does when she's emotionally or physically exhausted and raised her knees to wrap her arms around the legs. "I'm done... so friggin' done..."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not going to strive to be better than him anymore. I've already accomplished that... so I'm done. Tomorrow... I'm going to show up for team practice, like always... and just play. I'm in the FBA... I should be happy about that."
Victoria chuckled. "Woah, you sound content for once."
"Content? I will always work to be better... but from now on, that guy won't be in the back of my mind anymore. I'm done with him. I've already made horrible mistakes this season... opening my mouth too much and bitching about this and that, when I should be happy with what I've been given."
"So this means you won't be angry anymore about not having court play time, like you were back in Spokane?"
"Oh of course I want to play... but no, I'm not going to complain anymore."
Victoria laughed and grabbed the lemur's arm to hug. "About time, Haniel..."
"Yeah yeah..." And for the first time in a seemingly long time, Narkissa Kassius smiled.
The End
BuckHopper, characters by their respective owners.************
To lose against another FBA team was bad enough. To lose against another Canadian team, and badly at that, stung even worse. There may be some consolation that the loss was against the Winnipeg Voyageurs, one of the best teams in the Western Conference, and the FBA as a whole rather, but that didn't soothe the minds of the Edmonton Totems team as they wearily climbed into their team bus near the business exits of Riverside Arena.
"That dog was all over the court..." Rocky Caracal (Lynx, G) muttered, referring to Winnipeg's best player of the game Zoie Wilds (African Hunting Dog, G) that scored thirty points and ripped thirteen steals away from the Totems' butterfingered paws. Some of his teammates overheard him, responding with either nods of agreement or snerks.
"We lost focus... we hurt ourselves, and all Winnipeg did was pick up our pieces and throw the shards back at us," Stan Shields (grey wolf, HC) replied and dropped his bag into the luggage compartment of the bus with not-subtle hints of disappointment. "Time to move on though. Fly back home and face the Spectrums in a few days. With the season coming to a close soon, we need all the wins we can get to have at most a #6 seed in the playoffs."
Lenny Hicks (Coydog, F) snorts softly. "We really need to wake up, people. We're in a slump, have been over the past couple games, and the last thing we need is a long losing streak right into the playoffs."
Of all the players climbing into the bus, Narkissa Kassius (Lemur, G) was among the silent ones. To the casual observer, that may strike them as odd as Narkissa has a very active tweeter account and was somewhat notorious for opening her mouth about what she felt was 'undeserved' treatment from the Spokane Rapids. Likely she opened her mouth too much as she ended up traded to the Totems, and while she missed her old teammates, she couldn't help but to be amused with glee when the Totems came against the Rapids a while ago and won. Her teammates still joke about the awkward moment during that game when she passed the ball to a former teammate, causing the turnover. With the musings of the team crowded out by VNV Nation music blaring into her ears via her beloved Cowon S9 device, Narkissa picked a seat near the center of the bus and slumped her forehead against the window glass.
Too content with the singing voice of Ronan Harris, Narkissa didn't even register a response when Victoria Ling (Panda, F) flicked a finger across one of the lemur's ears. When she flicked her ear again, Narkissa finally grunted and pulled the bud out of her ear before turning her head to look back at Victoria sitting behind her.
"What?" Narkissa replied to her teammate that (ironically) was also a Spokane Rapid earlier in the season.
Victoria chuckled. "You look rather down for someone that didn't play tonight."
"Pfft, that's the point. I didn't play," Narkissa replied with a deadpan tone.
"As if it'll make much of a difference, Haniel," Victoria replied using Narkissa's angelic nickname. "Sorry girl, but you're not torching the court on fire and Winnipeg's just too tough."
"You've heard me bitch when we were both in Spokane. You should know how I feel about that sort of thing."
"You can't be a starter right out of college and be the next superstar for the FBA. You have to work hard, and that can take years. Believe me... I know," Victoria said with tints of begrudging admittance. "Quit acting like you have something to prove to everyone. You're in the FBA, you know how many people wanted to be in the FBA and failed to even be drafted?"
Narkissa grunted and was tempted to put the earbud back on, but didn't want to come off as rude. "Yeah well, you don't have a parent that--"
Victoria glares back at her and reached a paw over the seat 'barrier' between them to forcefully cover Narkissa's muzzle. "I seriously don't want to hear more about your father again, Narkissa. I mean seriously, that's been bothering you all season."
The lemur grabbed her paw and pried it off her muzzle. "And you don't know why?"
"Of course I know why," Victoria said and leaned back on her seat. "You've explained it to us constantly... I like you but you can be a broken record sometimes."
Narkissa sighed. "I know... I'm sorry--"
"Hey Narkissa!" The voice of Mark Ferramin (Ferret, C) snapped her attention to him, but his pointing gesture to someone outside of the bus alerted her to gaze in that direction and she muttered a profane word. Roughly pulling the other earbud off, she stuffed the wires into her pockets and stood up, her mood quickly souring even more. Ignoring the other teammates and coaches, she hurried down the bus aisle like an angel of fury, bumping against the others as they found their seats and ignoring their complaints.
"Kassius! We have a plane to catch!" Her head coach barked out, but it fell on selectively-deaf lemur ears.
Narkissa stormed out of the bus, immediately approaching the source of her anger waiting by one of the stadium exit doorways. "What the hell are you doing here?"
The male ringtail lemur simply rolled his eyes, brushing a paw back along his greying hair. "I've always known you to be feisty but is that really a good way of greeting your father?"
Narkissa clenched her jaws, her paws curling into fists. She stood before him, looking up to see his face, something she had done her entire life with him. After a few moments of self-calming silence, she sucks in a deep breath. "How... did you get here?"
William Kassius leaned against the outside wall of the arena, paws into his jacket pockets. "I knew a few buddies that worked in this place. They owed me a few favors so they pulled some corners and gave me an access pass."
"Go back home..."
William shook his head. "Back to Arizona? Not until I have a talk with you."
Narkissa growled. "Follow me to Edmonton, I have an apartment." She rudely turned her back at him and took a step toward the bus when William suddenly grabbed her shoulder to force her to turn to him again. Narkissa roughly slapped the hold off of her.
"Here is just as good as anywhere else," William replied with a glare. "The bus can wait a few more minutes, it still has staff putting in the luggage. Please, Kissa... just a few minutes?"
She brushed back her red hair, letting out a sigh as she crossed her arms. "Five minutes and then I'm going back into the bus and you go straight back to Arizona."
William could only flinch at her behavior. Has their relationship been strained this much? Taking a moment to recollect his wits, the old lemur cleared his throat. "I know that... I haven't been much of a father to you, especially when coming to terms with this... sport."
Narkisa quickly scoffed but allowed him to continue on, even signaling with a wave to back her coaches off for the time being when they started to approach them.
"But I'm still your father, and lately I've been seeing how... distant we've become. Remember back in Spokane when your family showed up to your place for Thanksgiving? We shared the dinner table together but you still barely spoke to me."
"What do you want?" Narkissa retorted, massaging her forehead.
"I want to know why you're behaving like this to your own father."
The words stung her, even to the point of physically grimacing in response before looking back at his eyes. "You want to know why? After all this time, for many years, you still don't get it? There's a big reason why I took up basketball back in high school, Daddy... it's because I love the game and because... I hated how you spat on it. So I played in spite of you."
William blinked and shook his head. "I know you've done it out of rebelling against me but you took it too far when you played all the way to college, and crossed the line when you decided to enter the FBA draft! You could have been a great geologist!"
Narkissa hissed and unzipped her jacket, pulling it off and tossed it straight onto the ground. The sound of her music device tucked in the pockets breaking did give her some pause, but she dismissed it for now as she glared back at her father. "Goddamnit! You could have pulled your head out of your ass and supported me! Yeah, I know that you think the FBA screwed you and the media screwed you by overhyping you when you were picked third overall in the Draft. For my ENTIRE LIFE, I listened to you bitch and moan about the FBA, and I had to listen to bullies tormenting me in elementary school saying how much you sucked!"
Even the arena employees started to back away from them at this point, and William's face slowly distorted into an expression of sheer cold fury. It was an expression that Narkissa learned from a very young age to never provoke him to that point, but for once, she refused to back off. His fists clenched the insides of his pockets tightly, tearing the fabric with the claws. "Look at yourself... traded during your rookie season? Even I didn't have to go through that embarrassment, Kissa. You barely play on the court, and when you do, you weren't ever... impressive. Missing shots, getting turnovers..."
Narkissa clenched her eyes shut, her voice starting in a whisper and progressively increases in volume. "Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up!" She opened her eyes, moist with tears. "You never attended my games, never taught me one single BIT about basketball, and according to Mom, you even turned off the television whenever Mom tried to watch me in the FBA! People think that I'm going crazy because of you, Dad! Going in-friggin'-sane!" Her body motions became more animated, arms flailing wide and ringtail fizzled out to almost twice its normal size. "Maybe I am going nuts!"
William barely registered an emotional response, watching her clench her hair tightly as she briskly paced in front of him. His eyes finally gaze over at the bus, seeing many more eyes looking back at him. "Your entire team's watching. Calm down."
Her daughter snapped her attention back at him, finally frozen in her motions but that only lasted a few seconds. "You... don't care about me, do you?"
"Of course I care about you, Narkissa. You're my daughter!"
"You... don't care." Her low tone of voice barely carried above the rumbling of the bus engine nearby, but William clearly heard her. "Ever since high school, I wanted to be in the FBA..."
"And look where it got you," William interrupted, frowning. "The FBA will corrupt you just as it did to me. It tore apart my dreams, chewed on me and spat me out, hanging me out to dry at the end."
"You did it to yourself..."
William thought he heard her correctly but didn't want to know that came from his own daughter's mouth. He tilts his head forward, ears perked. "What did you say?"
"You did it to yourself..." Narkissa repeated, louder with a growl. "You believed your own hype, and when you were regulated to the bench and go into inactive status, you couldn't handle it... and when your contract ended, you refused an extension by your first team thinking you were more valuable and waited for another team to pick you up... and it never happened. You did it to yourself, Daddy... you and your friggin' ego-"
Narkissa should have seen his paw pull out of his pocket and spring itself back, but she didn't and the slap across her face shocked her into silence. Her head snapped to the side and she leaned away, blinking as one of her paws slowly reaches up to rest against her cheek. It was the very first time in her life that he had slapped her, and the first time he did any abuse of the sort toward her. Even William shuddered at the realization of what he had done, his paw shivering. A uproar of shock and disgust came out from the bus' inhabitants, and some of Narkissa's teammates start filing out as they face them from a short distance.
"Can't you see what they're doing to you, Narkissa?" William finally broke the silence after the slap. "The FBA is breaking us apart... please leave this sport. Please... go back to Arizona and be what you've been wanting to do since you were my little girl, as a geologist. Staying on this team and playing this satanic sport is only going to make you worse. Don't make the same mistakes I had made..."
"You get the hell out!" Victoria yelled out from the bus doorway, but Narkissa glanced back at her team and again waved her paw silently to hold them back. She rubbed her cheek once more before her paws relax back at her sides, and she bent down to pick up her jacket. A flood of thoughts crossed her mind and finally she shook her head.
"I'm becoming just like you, Dad... I've realized that just now. Becoming just like you..."
William's mouth opened but nothing came out. Narkissa clutched her jacket tightly and turned her face toward him, her sore cheek moist with her tears. "I had a big ego coming into the FBA... sure I wasn't drafted third like you, but I had an ego. I wanted to prove myself that I'm a great player, unlike you, and I wanted to show you that... basketball ain't all that... bad." She chuckled, half-delirious. "And when I stayed on the bench for game after game, I couldn't handle it, just like you. I upset my teammates, I distracted them with my bitching, and I angered management back in Spokane with my stupid mouth. I beaten myself up, taking every single missed shot personally, recycling every bad moment I had on the court over and over in my head until they refused to go away. I wanted to step out of your damn shadow... and all this time, I was curling myself deeper into it."
William's eyes brighten slightly, having a hope that finally... finally, she would wake up and leave the FBA forever, believing it to be a source of her eternal torment. "There's still a chance to get out of it. Just quit and start a new life. There's nothing wrong with that..."
The female lemur's fangs flashed under the lights of the arena for a moment, and with her whole body shaking visibly, she stepped in close to her father's face. "No. No. You know what, Dad? William? I'm tired of this crap. I'm tired of trying to prove to you about anything. I'm tired of being in your shadow, I'm tired of stupid reporters asking me about how I feel about you being a FBA draft bust, I'm tired of everything. But most of all... I'm tired of you. Sick and tired of you."
William let out an incoherent mutter of words incredulously. "What?! Now you're acting crazy, Narkissa... come on! Wake the hell up! Get out of your ass and understand that all that I've done for you, including trying to get you out of this basketball crap for years, was done for your best interests! But you never once listened to me and here you are in this muck and yelling at me saying I'm not your daughter anymore! Wake up, I'm trying to get you out of this nightmare!"
Narkissa gritted her fangs and turned away from him, walking back toward her bus.
"Kissa! Kissa, where are you going? I love you..."
Her steps slowed to a stop, even as her teammates started to part way waiting for her to enter the bus. She watched her teammates just as they watch her back silently, and for a long tense moment, only the sound of the bus engine provided the monotone melody to entertain their ears. She wiped her tears off her cheeks and sniffed, slowly pivoting on her feet to face her father again. A figure that she once looked up to while growing up. A figure that for many years, even up to this point, she tried desperately to win his love. Where is she going, exactly? Back to her team and end up going through the same disappointing motions, disappointing her teammates and herself? Or back into the arms of her father, quitting the FBA for good and becoming a geologist like a good Daddy's girl? Both directions look gloom to her. Stay in the FBA and continue to be in her father's shadow, never reaching her dreams of becoming a better player than her father ever was? Or quit and regret that decision for the rest of her life, studying dirt to earn a paycheck?
If you reach a fork with two paths that hold nothing but hell for you, what should you do?
When she walked slowly back toward her father, some of the members of the team grimaced in disappointment and sorrow, thinking she made a horrid mistake of leaving the FBA because her father said so. To some, knowing about her 'Daddy Issues', they thought this was inevitable. But instead she plucked her broken music device out of her jacket's pockets and handed the jacket, bearing the Edmonton Totems colors and logo, to him. Speechless, William accepted the jacket and simply gazed down at it.
"This is my team jacket... even got my last name and the number 11 on it. See there?" Narkissa pointed them out to him. "When you go back home, give this to Mom... but if you want to burn it, you can."
William looked back at her. "... What?"
"For years, I thought I was in a shadow you created, when all along that shadow was something I made. I've realized that now... William, you want to believe that the FBA is corrupt and the source of our breakup? Go ahead... believe all you like. But if you want to know the truth... if you want to know who or what really is the corrupt source of our breakup... look yourself in the mirror. If you want to burn this jacket, go ahead. But if you do that, you burn the very last thing you will see of me in person."
"Narkissa..."
She shook her head. "I'm going to move to a new place in Edmonton, and you will not know the address. I'm going to change my phone number too. Do not try to look for me. If you try to call me anyway, I will not answer. Let me go, for I've decided to let you go. And tell Mom that I'm sorry."
With those words, she turned and finally walked out of her father's shadow for good. Her teammates watched as she climbed into the team bus, leaving behind an old male lemur weakly holding her jacket. Silently the rest of the team followed suit, finding their seats as they prepare to leave for the airport. Narkissa slumped back on her own seat, glancing at her broken music device and feeling a crack on the panel along with a finger.
"Hey, you gonna be alright?" Victoria said as she sat next to her.
Narkissa nodded, her ringtail coiling around herself slowly as she often does when she's emotionally or physically exhausted and raised her knees to wrap her arms around the legs. "I'm done... so friggin' done..."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not going to strive to be better than him anymore. I've already accomplished that... so I'm done. Tomorrow... I'm going to show up for team practice, like always... and just play. I'm in the FBA... I should be happy about that."
Victoria chuckled. "Woah, you sound content for once."
"Content? I will always work to be better... but from now on, that guy won't be in the back of my mind anymore. I'm done with him. I've already made horrible mistakes this season... opening my mouth too much and bitching about this and that, when I should be happy with what I've been given."
"So this means you won't be angry anymore about not having court play time, like you were back in Spokane?"
"Oh of course I want to play... but no, I'm not going to complain anymore."
Victoria laughed and grabbed the lemur's arm to hug. "About time, Haniel..."
"Yeah yeah..." And for the first time in a seemingly long time, Narkissa Kassius smiled.
The End
Category Story / All
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