Joking Quotes

“Come on, Feyre. We don't bite. Unless you ask us to.'

Rhys slid his hands into his pockets. 'The last I heard, Cassian, no one has ever taken you up on that offer.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Mist and Fury

“You are slightly stuck with him for...' He makes a face. 'Well, forever.'

'Or until one of us dies,' I joke, but it falls flat...”
― Rebecca Yarros, Fourth Wing

“We learned something of her capabilities.'

'And you want me to tell you that was worth you being poisoned?' the knight demands.

'I'm always being poisoned. Alas, that it wasn't blusher mushroom,' the prince said nonsensically.

Tiernan nods his chin at me. 'That girl thinks you're a fool for even being here.'

I scowl, because that's not what I meant.

'Ah, Lady Wren,' Oak says, a lazy smile on his mouth. Marigold hair brushing his forehead, half-hiding his horns. 'You wound me.”
― Holly Black, The Stolen Heir

“Somebody bring the Thorazine and the straitjacket," Eddie called. "Roland just went over the high side."
Roland paid no attention to this; he was coming to understand that Eddie's jokes and his clowning were his way of dealing with stress.”
― Stephen King, The Waste Lands

“What the hell is that?'

Cassian was grinning that next evening as he waved a hand toward the pile of pine boughs dumped on the ornate red rug in the centre of the foyer. 'Solstice decorations. Straight from the market.'

Snow clung to his broad shoulders and dark hair, and his tan cheeks were flushed with cold. 'You call that a decoration?

He smirked. 'A heap of pine in the middle of the floor is Night Court tradition.'

I crossed my arms. 'Funny.'

'I'm serious.' I glared, and he laughed. 'It's for the mantels, the banister, and whatever else, smartass. Want to help?' He shrugged off his heavy coat, revealing a black jacket and shirt beneath, and hung it in the hall closet. I remained where I was and tapped my foot.

'What?' he said, brows rising. It was rare to see Cassian in anything but his Illyrian leathers, but the clothes, while not as fine as anything Rhys or Mor usually favoured, suited him.

'Dumping a bunch of trees at my feet is really how you say hello these days? A little time in that Illyrian camp and you forget all your manners.'

Cassian was on me in a second, hoisting me off the ground to twirl me until I was going to be sick. I beat at his chest, cursing at him.

Cassian set me down at last. 'What did you get me for Solstice?'

I smacked his arm. 'A heaping pile of shut the hell up.' He laughed again, and I winked at him. 'Hot cocoa or wine?'

Cassian curved a wing around me, turning us toward the cellar door. 'How many good bottles does little Rhysie have left?”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Wings and Ruin

“Did something happen that I, as your chaperone, should know about?”
― Sarah J. Maas, A ​Court of Silver Flames

“Don't you look handsome.'

'I know.' He preens sarcastically, straightening his sash over a midnight-black doublet. 'I've heard healer cadets have a thing for riders.”
― Rebecca Yarros, Fourth Wing

“Do you like it?' he repeated, and his lips tugged into a smile.

I took an uneven breath and stared at the glen again. 'Yes.'

He chuckled. 'That's it? 'Yes'?'

'Would you like me to grovel with gratitude for bringing me here, High Lord?'

'Ah. The Suriel told you nothing important, did it?'

That smile of his sparked something bold in my chest. 'He also said that you like being brushed, and if I'm a clever girl, I might train you with treats.'

Tamlin tipped his head to the sky and roared with laughter. Despite myself, I let out a soft laugh.

'I might die of surprise,' Lucien said behind me. 'You made a joke, Feyre.'

I turned to look at him with a cool smile. 'You don't want to know what the Suriel said about you.' I flicked my brows up, and Lucien lifted his hands in defeat.

'I'd pay good money to hear what the Suriel thinks of Lucien,' Tamlin said.

A cork popped, followed by the sounds of Lucien chugging the bottle's contents and chuckling with a muttered. 'Brushed.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“I look at the pool of glittering starlight and let out a heavy breath. I needed to change the subject. 'What would happen if I were to drink the water?'

Tamlin straightened a bit- then relaxed, as if glad to release that old sadness. 'Legend claims you'd be happy until your last breath.' He added, 'Perhaps we both need a glass.'

'I don't think that entire pool would be enough for me,' I said, and he laughed.

'Two jokes in one day- a miracle sent from the Cauldron,' he said. I cracked a smile. He came a step closer, as if forcibly leaving behind the dark, sad stain of what had happened to Lucien, and the starlight danced in his eyes as he said. 'What would be enough to make you happy?'

I blushed from my neck to the top of my head. 'I- I don't know.' It was true- I'd never given that sort of thing any thought beyond getting my sisters safely married off and having enough food for me and my father, and time to learn to paint.

'Hmm,' he said, not stepping away. 'What about the ringing of bluebells? Or a ribbon of sunshine? Or a garland of moonlight?' He grinned wickedly.

High Lord of Prythian indeed. High Lord of Foolery was more like it.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“I never got to thank you for your advice with the Suriel.'

Lucien tensed. 'Oh?'

I looked ahead at the easy way Tamlin rode, the horse utterly unbothered by his mighty rider. 'If you still want me dead,' I said, 'you might have to try a bit harder.'

Lucien loosed a breath. 'That's not what I intended.' I gave him a long look. 'I wouldn't shed any tears,' he amended. I knew it was true. 'But what happened to you-'

'I was joking,' I said, and gave him a little smile.

'You can't possibly forgive me that easily for sending you into danger.'

'No. And part of me would like nothing more than to wallop you for your lack of warning about the Suriel. But I understand: I'm a human who killed your friend, who now lives in your house, and you have to deal with me. I understand,' I said again.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“Sorry to interrupt while things were getting interesting.'

'Fortunately for Cassian's balls,' Amren said, nestling back into her chaise, 'you arrived at the right time.'

Cassian snarled halfheartedly at her.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Mist and Fury

“She'd selected a dagger and he'd grinned. Pointy end goes into your enemy.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A ​Court of Silver Flames

“Don't worry- if someone sees us, I'll just say that I was overcome with lust at first sight and couldn't wait another second to get you out of your pants.'

'Ever the smart-ass.' A wry smile tugs at his lips as we start down the hall.

'I can throw in a few oh, Dain cries once we're in your room just for believability,' I offer, and actually mean it.”
― Rebecca Yarros, Fourth Wing

“I shrug. 'They were just dead flowers.'

'They were mutilated violets.' HIs mouth tightens and I go to him, resting my hands on his head.

'It's not like they came with a death note or anything.' I tease, stroking his soft brown hair.

He looks up at me, the mage lights making his eyes a little brighter above his trim beard. 'They're threats.'

I shrug. 'Every cadet gets threatened.'

'Every cadet doesn't have to wrap their knees every day,' he fires back.

'The injured ones do.”
― Rebecca Yarros, Fourth Wing

“So is this what you do with your lives? Spare humans from the Treaty and have fine meals?' I gave a pointed glance toward Tamlin's baldric, the warrior's clothes, Lucien's sword.

Lucien smirked. 'We also dance with the spirits under the full moon and snatch human babes from their cradles to replace with changelings-”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“I heard its voice in my head. It told me to look.'

Lucien rolled his shoulders. 'Well, thank the Cauldron that you didn't. Cleaning up that mess would have ruined the rest of my day.' He gave me a wan smile. I didn't return it.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“Unfortunately for you and your neck,' Lucien countered, 'tonight's just a party.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Thorns and Roses

“The Light that lights every person who comes into the world is not a joking matter. That Light which God has set within the human breast, which can isolate a soul and hang it between heaven and hell, as lonely as if God had created but that one person—that is not a joking matter. Joke about politics if you must joke. Politics is usually funny any-way. But do not joke about God, and do not joke about conscience.”
― A.w. Tozer, Faith Beyond Reason

“Will you deign to join us, or do you have plans to ogle your muscles in the mirror?'

Cassian snorted, looping his elbow through hers and leading her up the street. 'I'll go- for the drinks, you ass. No dancing.'

'Thank the Mother. You nearly shattered my foot the last time you tried.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Mist and Fury

“He grinned at me now. 'With all those gems and beads, you might be too heavy to carry. I hope you've been practicing your winnowing in case I drop you.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Mist and Fury

“Helion braced a hand on the door frame and grinned. 'How'd you convince Thesan to give you the better view?'

'He finds my males to be prettier than yours, I think.'

'I think it's a wing fetish.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Wings and Ruin

“You and pretty Tarquin had a moment today. Do you truly think he'll join us?'

'If you mean in bed, definitely not,' Rhys said with a wry smile as he again sprawled on his spread of cushions. 'But if you mean in this war... Yes, I believe he means to fight.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Wings and Ruin

“Are you just going to hold that chicken all night?' Cassian asked me from the table.

Scowling, I stomped towards him, plunking the platter onto the wooden surface. 'I spat in it,' I said sweetly.

'Makes it all the more delicious,' Cassian crooned, smiling right back.”
― Sarah J. Maas, A Court of Frost and Starlight

“I can't be perfect every moment of every day, Nes." His eyes flickered”
― Sarah J. Maas, A ​Court of Silver Flames

“I'm aware that my hair is in need of a trim, but your aim is off,' he said. 'You should really work on that since I've quite partial to my face.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, From Blood and Ash

“He raised his brows as his gaze travelled the length of my bare leg. 'Scandalous,' he murmured.

A growl of annoyance burst from me.

He laughed. 'And such dainty little slippers. Satin and silk? They're as finely tailored as your leg. The kind of slipper no guard of the Rise would wear.

How astute of him.

'Unless they are being outfitted differently than I am,' ...”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, From Blood and Ash

“You shouldn't be in here.'

'I'm your personal guard,' he replied. 'I can be wherever I feel I am needed to keep you safe.'

'And what do you think you need to protect me from in here?' I demanded, looking around. 'An unruly bedpost I might stub my toe on? Oh, wait, are you worried I might faint? I know how good you are at handling such emergencies.'

'You do look a little pale,' he replied. 'My ability to catch frail, delicate females may come in handy.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, From Blood and Ash

“Is it okay for me to enter?' I asked, clasping my hands together. 'Or should I wait out here while you inspect under the bed for stray dust bunnies?'

Hawke looked over his shoulder. 'It's not dust bunnies I'm worried about. Steps, on the other hand? Yes.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, From Blood and Ash

“Is what happened tonight common?'

'Which part? The marriage proposal or the open-heart surgery?”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, A Kingdom of Flesh and Fire

“Are you done talking yet? Or are you too afraid that I might actually beat you, so you won't shut up?'

'I like hearing myself talk.'

'I'm sure you do.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, A Kingdom of Flesh and Fire