The Hydrophobic Skunk

By Irvin S. Cobb
Directions: Read the short story and answer the questions. Refer to the text to check your answers when appropriate.
The Hydrophobic Skunk resides at the extreme bottom of the We went on and on at a lazy mule trot, hearing the unwritten
Grand Canyon and, next to a Southern Republican who never annals of the range from one who had seen them enacted at first
hand. Pretty soon we passed a herd of burros with mealy, dusty
asked for a Federal office, is the rarest of living creatures. He is
noses and spotty hides, feeding on prickly pears and rock
so   rare   that   nobody   ever   saw   him­­that   is,   nobody   except   a lichens; and just before sunset we slid down the last declivity4
native. I met plenty of tourists who had seen people who had out upon the plateau and came to a camp as was a camp!
seen him, but never a tourist who had seen him with his own
This was roughing it deluxe with a most deluxey vengeance!
eyes. In addition to being rare, he is highly gifted.  Here were three tents, or rather three canvas houses, with
I think almost anybody will agree with me that the common, wooden half walls; and they were spick-and-span inside and out,
and had glass windows in them and doors and matched wooden
ordinary skunk  has been  most richly dowered by Nature.  To
floors. . . . The mess tent was provided with a table with a clean
adorn a skunk with any extra qualifications seems as  great a cloth to go over it, and there were china dishes and china cups
waste of the raw material as painting the lily or gilding refined and shiny knives, forks and spoons. . . . Bill was in charge of the
gold.   He   is   already   amply   equipped   for   outdoor   pursuits. camp--a dark, rangy, good-looking leading man of a cowboy,
Nobody intentionally shoves him round; everybody gives him wearing his blue shirt and his red neckerchief with an air.
as much room as he seems to need. He commands respect­­nay, That Johnny certainly could cook! Served on china dishes upon
more than that, respect and veneration1­­wherever he goes. Joy a cloth-covered table, we had mounds of fried steaks and shoals
of fried bacon; and a bushel, more or less, of sheepherder
riders never run him down and foot passengers avoid crowding
potatoes; and green peas and sliced peaches out of cans; and
him into a corner. You would think Nature had done amply well sour-dough biscuits as light as kisses and much more filling; and
by the skunk; but no­­the Hydrophobic Skunk comes along and fresh butter and fresh milk; and coffee as black as your hat and
upsets   all   these   calculations.   Besides   carrying   the   traveling strong as sin. How easy it is for civilized man to become
credentials   of   an   ordinary   skunk,   he   is   rabid   in   the   most primitive and comfortable in his way of eating, especially if he
has just ridden ten miles on a buckboard and nine more on a
rabidissimus2  form. He is not mad just part of the time, like mule and is away down at the bottom of the Grand Canyon--and
one's relatives by marriage­­and not mad most of the time, like there is nobody to look on disapprovingly when he takes a bite
the old­fashioned railroad ticket agent­­but mad all the time­­ that would be a credit to a steam shovel!
incurably,   enthusiastically   and   unanimously   mad!   He   is   mad Despite all reports to the contrary, I wish to state that it is no
and he is glad of it.  trouble at all to eat green peas off a knife-blade--you merely
mix them in with potatoes for a cement; and fried steak--take it
We made the acquaintance of the Hydrophobic Skunk when we from an old steak eater--tastes best when eaten with those tools
rode down Hermit Trail. The casual visitor to the Grand Canyon of Nature's own providing, both hands and your teeth. An hour
first of all takes the rim drive; then he essays Bright Angel Trail, passed--busy, yet pleasant--and we were both gorged to the gills
which is sufficiently scary for his purposes until he gets used to and had reared back with our cigars lit to enjoy a third jorum5
it; and after that he grows more adventurous and tackles Hermit of black coffee apiece, when Johnny, speaking in an offhand
Trail, which is a marvel of corkscrew convolutions, gimleting way to Bill, who was still hiding away biscuits inside of himself
its way down this red abdominal wound of a canyon to the very like a parlor prestidigitator6, said:
gizzard of the world. Here, Johnny, our guide, felt moved to
"Seen any of them old Hydrophobies the last day or two?" 
speech, and we hearkened to his words and hungered for more,
for Johnny knows the ranges of the Northwest as a city dweller "Not so many," said Bill casually. "There was a couple out last
knows his own little side street. In the fall of the year Johnny night pirootin' round in the moonlight. I reckon, though, there'll
comes down to the Canyon and serves as a guide a while; and be quite a flock of 'em out to­night. A new moon always seems
then, when he gets so he just can't stand associating with tourists to fetch 'em up from the river." 
any   longer,   he   packs   his   war   bags   and   journeys   back   to   the
Northern Range and enjoys the company of cows a spell. Cows Both   of   us   quit   blowing   on   our   coffee   and   we   put   the   cups
are not exactly exciting, but they don't ask fool questions.  down. I think I was the one who spoke. 
A   highly   competent   young   person   is   Johnny   and   a  cow­
"We   were   just   speakin'   to   one   another   about   them
puncher3  of   parts.   Most   of   the   Canyon   guides   are   cow­
Hydrophoby   Skunks,"   said   Bill   apologetically.   "This   here
punchers­­accomplished ones, too, and of high standing in the
Canyon is where they mostly hang out and frolic 'round." 
profession. With a touch of reverence Johnny pointed out to us
Sam Scovel, the greatest bronco buster of his time, now engaged
Vocabulary
in piloting tourists. 
1. veneration: respect or awe
"Can   he   ride?"   echoed   Johnny   in   answer   to   our   question. 2. rabidissimus: not a real word; taken to mean very rabid
"Scovel could ride an earthquake if she stood still long enough 3. cow-puncher: cowboy
for him to mount! He rode Steamboat­­not Young Steamboat, 4. declivity: downward slope or hill
5. jorum: a vessel used for drinking
but Old Steamboat! He rode Rocking Chair, and he's the only
6. prestidigitator: a magician; one who performs sleight-of-hand
man that ever did that and was not called on in a couple of days "Then, of course, since we sleep indoors everything will be all
to attend his own funeral." right," I put in.
We went on and on at a lazy mule trot, hearing the unwritten "Well, yes and no," answered Johnny. "In the early part of the
annals of the range from one who had seen them enacted at first evening a Hydrophoby is liable to do a lot of prowlin' round
hand. Pretty soon we passed a herd of burros with mealy, dusty outdoors; but toward mornin' they like to get into camps--they
noses and spotty hides, feeding on prickly pears and rock dig up under the side walls or come up through the floor--and
lichens; and just before sunset we slid down the last declivity they seem to prefer to get in bed with you. They're cold-
out upon the plateau and came to a camp as was a camp! blooded, I reckin, same as rattlesnakes. Cool nights always do
I laid down my cigar, too. I admit I was interested.  drive 'em in, seems like."
"Oh!" I said softly­­like that. "Is it? Do they?"  "It's going to be sort of coolish to-night," said Bill casually.

"Yes,"   said   Johnny.   "I   reckin   there's   liable   to   be   one   come It certainly was. I don't remember a chillier night in years. My
teeth were chattering a little--from cold--before we turned in. I
shovin'   his   old   nose   into   that   door   any   minute.   Or   probably
retired with all my clothes on, including my boots and leggings,
two­­they mostly travels in pairs­­sets, as you might say."  and I wished I had brought along my ear muffs. I also buttoned
my watch into my lefthand shirt pocket, the idea being if for any
"You'd know one the minute you saw him, though," said Bill.
reason I should conclude to move during the night I would be
"They're  smaller   than   a  regular  skunk   and  spotted   where  the fully equipped for traveling. The door would not stay closely
other kind is striped. And they got little red eyes. You won't shut--the door-jamb had sagged a little and the wind kept
have no trouble at all recognizin' one."  blowing the door ajar. But after a while we dozed off.

It was at this juncture that we both got up and moved back by It was 1:27 A. M. when I woke with a violent start. I know this
was the exact time because that was when my watch stopped. I
the stove. It was warmer there and the chill of evening seemed
peered about me in the darkness. The door was wide open--I
to be settling down noticeably.  could tell that. Down on the floor there was a dragging,
"Funny thing about Hydrophoby Skunks," went on Johnny after scuffling sound, and from almost beneath me a pair of small red
a moment of pensive thought­­"mad, you know!"  eyes peered up phosphorescently9.
"He's here!" I said to my companion as I emerged from my
"What  makes them  mad?" The  two  of us asked the  question
blankets; and he, waking instantly, seemed instinctively to know
together.  whom I meant. I used to wonder at the ease with which a
cockroach can climb a perfectly smooth wall and run across the
"Born that way!" explained Bill­­"mad from the start, and won't
ceiling. I know now that to do this is the easiest thing in the
never do nothin' to get shut of it."  world--if you have the proper incentive behind you. I had gone
"Ahem­­they never attack humans, I suppose?"  up one wall of the tent and had crossed over and was in the act
of coming down the other side when Bill burst in, his eyes
"Don't   they?"   said  Johnny,  as   if  surprised  at such   ignorance. blurred with sleep, a lighted lamp in one hand and a gun in the
"Why, humans is their favorite pastime! Humans is just pie to a other.
Hydrophoby   Skunk.   It   ain't   really   any   fun   to   be   bit   by   a I never was so disappointed in my life because it wasn't a
Hydrophoby Skunk neither." He raised his coffee cup to his lips Hydrophobic Skunk at all. It was a pack rat, sometimes called a
and imbibed6 deeply.  trade rat, paying us a visit. The pack or trade rat is also a
denizen of the Grand Canyon. He is about four times as big as
"Which you certainly said something then, Johnny," stated Bill. an ordinary rat and has an appetite to correspond. He sometimes
"You see," he went on, turning to us, "they aim to catch you invades your camp and makes free with your things, but he
never steals anything outright--he merely trades with you; hence
asleep and they creep up right soft and take holt of you­­take
his name. He totes off a side of meat or a bushel of meal and
holt of a year usually­­and clamp their teeth and just hang on for brings a cactus stalk in; or he will confiscate your saddlebags
further orders. Some says they hang on till it thunders, same as and leave you in exchange a nice dry chip. He is honest, but
snappin' turtles. But that's a lie, I judge, because there's weeks from what I can gather he never gets badly stuck on a deal.
on a stretch down here when it don't thunder. All the cases I Next morning at breakfast Johnny and Bill were doing a lot of
ever heard of they let go at sunup."  laughing between them over something or other.
"It is right painful at the time," said Johnny, taking up the thread
of the narrative; "and then in nine days you go mad yourself. Vocabulary
7. imbibed: drank
Remember that fellow the Hydrophoby Skunk bit down here by 8. prospectors: people searching an area for minerals, such as gold
the   rapids,   Bill?   Let's   see   now­­what   was   that  hombre's7 9. phosphorescently: in a way that emits light
name?" 
"Williams,"   supplied   Bill­­"Heck   Williams.   I   saw   him   at
Flagstaff when they took him there to the hospital. That guy
certainly did carry on regardless. First he went mad and his eyes
turned red, and he got so he didn't have no real use for water­­
well,   them  prospectors8  don't   never   care   much   about   water
anyway­­and then he got to snappin' and bitin' and foamin' so's
they had to strap him down to his bed. He got loose though." 
"Broke loose, I suppose?" I said.
"No, he bit loose," said Bill with the air of one who would not
deceive you even in a matter of small details.
"Do you mean to say he bit those leather straps in two?"
"No, sir; he couldn't reach them," explained Bill, "so he bit the
bed in two. Not in one bite, of course," he went on. "It took him
several. I saw him after he was laid out. He really wasn't no
credit to himself as a corpse."
Presently my friend spoke, and it seemed to me his voice was a
mite husky. Well, he had a bad cold.
"You said they mostly attack persons who are sleeping out,
didn't you?"
"That's right, too," said Johnny, and Bill nodded in affirmation.
Name: ____________________________________

1. Which best expresses the narrator's sentiments on skunks?

a. Skunks are disgusting and worthy of hatred. b. Skunks must be respected for their fearsome abilities.
c. Skunks are one of nature's most beautiful creations. d. Skunks are pests that should be attacked on sight.

2. Which does NOT apply to Johnny?

a. He takes things too seriously. b. He is a talented chef.
c. He is a skilled horseback rider. d. He knows how to tell a story.

3. Which best describes the conditions in which the narrator and his companions were camping?
a. They were sleeping under the stars and foraging for their food.
b. They were staying in small tents and eating beans from a can.
c. They had luxurious accommodations and plenty of food.
d. They were staying in a five-star hotel in downtown Flagstaff.

4. Which best explains why Bill and Johnny tell the narrator and his companion about the Hydrophobic Skunks?
a. They were trying to teach them about nature. b. They were trying to warn them.
c. They were trying to scare them. d. They were trying to motivate them to help more.

5. Which statement best describes the narrator?

a. He is a rugged cowboy. b. He is a crafty salesman.
c. He is a fearless hero. d. He is a gullible tourist.

6. Why does the narrator button his watch into his shirt pocket before he goes to sleep?
a. He wants to protect his heart. b. He is preparing to flee.
c. He set the alarm to wake up early. d. He needs a comforting noise to go to sleep.

7. Which event happens last?

a. A rat frightens the narrator. b. Johnny cooks dinner.
c. The narrator learns about hydrophobic skunks. d. The men travel to the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

8. Which figurative language technique is used in the following sentence?

"Humans is just pie to a Hydrophoby Skunk."
a. Simile b. Metaphor
c. Personification d. Hyperbole

9. Which best describes the narrator's tone in this sentence from the last paragraph?
"He is honest, but from what I can gather he never gets badly stuck on a deal."
a. He is being humorous. b. Serious
c. Melancholy d. Intolerant

10. Which best explains why Johnny and Bill laughing at the end of the story?
a. They are laughing about how the narrator is afraid of rats.
b. They are laughing at the narrator's funny story.
c. They are laughing about how much money they made.
d. They are laughing about how they fooled the tourists.

Long Response: Answer the following questions in complete sentences.

1. In the first paragraph, the narrator says, "[The Hydrophobic Skunk] is so rare that nobody ever saw him­­that is,
nobody except a native." Why is it that only natives have ever seen the Hydrophobic Skunk? Use evidence from 
the text to support your answer.
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________

2. Summarize the text. List five to seven key events from the story in the order in which they happen. Your
summary should include main points from the beginning, middle, and end of the story.
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________