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Zaolan

@zaolan

Caspian | 25 | Virgo | Disaster

ava <- woman's name

bvb <- unknown, dangerous

cvc <- i get my prescritions from there :)

dvd <- movies

eve <- woman's name

that's all i know. sorry

fvf <- clown owl

gvg <- goblins vs gnomes

hvh <- unknown, dangerous

ivi <- sounds like ivy, woman's name

jvj <- tusked animal

and that that's all i know

kvk <- unknown, dangerous

lvl <- level

mvm <- tf2 mode

nvn <- sad bird

ovo <- inquisitive bird

and that's all i know. sorry

pvp <- player versus player

qvq <- crying bird

rvr <- unclear, potential threat, perhaps a lenny face?

svs <- unknown, dangerous

tvt <- tusked animal in mime makeup

uvu <- bird uwu

And thats all I know. Sorry

vvv <- stalactites

wvw <- more stalactites

xvx <- dead bird looking at you

zvz <- unknown, extremely dangerous

and that's all that is known. Sorry

i,m learning so much

I want to write. I have ideas. I open document. I type four of the worst sentences ever created in the english language. I daydream the rest of the scene. I close document.

I see the pendulum is firmly in the "only idiot losers go into the trades, have fun being crippled at age 40". But not to worry, in another two months it'll be back to "nice student debt idiot, has your job been taken by AI yet?"

And so balance will be kept and everyone will be wrong forever

"The trades are backbreaking, thankless work that will CRIPPLE you for LIFE" not really anymore if you wear your PPE and do team lifts

"Yeah, tradespeople are raking in 6 figures and living the high life while you all drown in student debt!" Actually a lot of us also have student debt and while the trades can pay very well, you're unlikely to take home 6 figures without working an incredible amount of overtime. Union benefits are good though

"That's right, only the TOUGHEST and MANLIEST of men could possibly handle these jobs!" My apprentice is a fat 5'3 woman and she's doing the same job as you, calm down Rambo

"Yeah, literally anyone can do this stuff, that's why in the post capitalist utopian commune we'll all just take turns" it's still difficult and dangerous manual labor that takes intense training and skill to do properly

"Yeah we have to ACTUALLY work for our paycheck, not like those whiny white collar nerds who just sit at a desk all day" well I managed to slack off enough to write all this, didn't I

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Reblogged valtsv

i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything

"the average income in <X> is <Y> of <currency>" cool, what's the median

Average isn't useful here. however, after a little bit of research, apparently the median income in the US is $24,327, which means the reality is actually much worse than this meme makes it seem. yay!

According to time magazine, median annual rent is $13,896, which means rent alone is 57% Of the median annual income, awesome!

Fatphobia's especially pervasive this time of year with family gatherings centered around food, so to those that struggle with eating and body image, or just happen to be fat in any way, I wish you safety from scrutiny, and guilt-free enjoyment of what you want to eat.

Me when I'm old as fuck and my grandkids talk to me: this reminds me of a post. I gotta go find the post

Grandkids: grandpa sit down you don't need to show us a post

Me: (not listening) Now where was that post....

villain going to the goon shelter to pick out a new henchman

this energetic and diabolical boy was rescued from a goon hoarding situation… he loves pulling levers, gloating, and turning cranks with great abandon. prefers to be the only goon. needs an active lair with plenty of enrichment.

now this fella comes with some baggage. his previous villain was going to have put down when he refused to perform unsedated human vivisection as a form of torture. one of our agents intercepted the execution and brought him to the goon shelter. would thrive in an environment of G or PG-rated villainry.

on the other hand, if you’re looking for something a little more… advanced… then this fine lady over here would make a great challenge for an experienced villain able to set firm boundaries. she will NOT be released to first-time villains; proof of prior henchpeople must be demonstrated before adoption approval. high prey drive. under no circumstances should she be left alone with children or small animals. must sign waiver releasing the goon shelter from responsibility if her behavior is deemed excessively depraved.

These two are pair-bonded and may only be adopted together. Up for anything, they are fiercely loyal to their employer provided their needs are met and they are permitted to hold hands. They look alarmingly similar to one another but it is undeterminable whether they are close blood relatives or lovers who choose to dress and style themselves in identical ways. Habit of finishing each other’s sentences with rhyming couplets; we have not attempted to train this out of them. Will answer to whatever names or titles you give them so long as they are complimentary and/or rhyme.

Will you help this goon find his forevil lair? He’s been returned to the goon shelter six times now but we refuse to give up on him. A vile little rat of a man, he’d be the perfect accomplice to someone willing to overlook his unfortunate heterosexuality. If gay-coding is not your style and you don’t expect it from a henchman, please consider giving this little guy a good home in your dastardly schemes.

This guy is not your typical goon. He was rescued from a high-kill shelter after being deemed unfit for henching. His deep baritone voice, his darkly handsome good looks, and his flair for the dramatic have made prospective employers pass over him time and time again, making him the longest resident of the goon shelter. But don’t judge a book by its cover—while his appearance and demeanor suggest “villain”, his real passion is taking orders and faithfully serving a master. If you’re secure in your villainry and not prone to jealousy, he may just be what it takes to turn your base into a lair.

One legitimately weird thing about Tumblr is that we literally can’t code for shit, many people quit working at Tumblr due to a hostile work environment, and we can’t seem to program a simple blogging website to not flood your RAM.

nearing the 10 year anniversary of banishing editable reblogs

skateboard will be so fictionalized that people forget we all have one inside of us. like the war of course but like they arent just fantasy creatures.... its just In There

hey. So skeletons may have autocorrected to skateboard,

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