i feel safe in the five am light; you carry my fears as the heavens set fire
hello mobile users!
i’m Fini! i’ve been on this website over half my life and that is going questionably for me
quick facts:
26 ||| they/them tme nonbinary ||| t4t polyam
physically disabled and autistic ||| white-perceived reconnecting Indigenous person; thankfully and blessedly living in my ancestors’ traditional land ||| from & in the “american” south
lucky to be married to one beautiful and brilliant woman, and long-term partnered with another
at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, “hm, this doesn’t look thick enough. maybe i’ll let it go for another 10 minutes.” this is the devil speaking. it’s only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think “this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid.” this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
More pieces from the Vinita Cultural Center from last year’s basketry exhibit
#the museum i worked at had a collection of these baskets!!!#they are like #idk its hard to describe them #they dont look quite like regular baskets they look like so beautiful #anyways check out the Mountain Heritage Center’s exhibit on cherokee/rivercane baskets to learn more
Yes, for some reason I don’t think they had any Rivercane baskets at this exhibit, the Vinita cultural center is a bit small so maybe that had to do with it? But traditionally Rivercane baskets look like this:
(credit to Lizzie “Nannie” Youngblood and Rowana Bradley, artist unknown for the Chief’s Heart shoppers basket)
The basket pictured in the post is likely commercial round reed (with some flat reed), the commercial form of the materials we would use such as Honeysuckle, Buckbrush, or Trumpet Vine. Many Western Cherokee picked up round reed basketry due to lack of supply of Rivercane after the forced removal to Oklahoma.
the thrift store generously blessed me today, thank you thrift gods
No, see, now you have to show us the blessing.
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you’re right!!! been searching for a solid cd display for years, found a cool as fuck one with three tiers that rotate independently. second picture is it at home with our collection in it!
and also!!! brand new completely unworn doc martens, a size up from my usual which i prefer for boots bc i put in thick insoles. the shelf was $13, boots were $10!
not pictured: bobby pins i really needed but didn’t want to pay full price for, like a hundred of them brand-new in the package for $2 instead of $10.
can non natives stop acting surprised and performatively jokey “uhh what lol!” about ice going after native americans. theyve been doing this for years and it ramped up last year and i had to hear all the stupid “uhhhh where will u deport them to 😜 silly republicans!” comments as if its not always been about detaining torturing murdering using as slave labor scattering communities through fear and intimidation etc. be an adult and act with maturity please. its not quirky or confusing its directly in line with americas racism and white supremacy to make sure native americans are eradicated
I think it’s notable also particularly in the Minneapolis context that of the 6 or so (US) Native people I have heard of being detained in the past few days there, at least half were unhoused. This context is important esp given the recent history (I can’t remember the year but starting sometime when I lived there from 2016-2020) of police violently dismantling encampments of Native unhoused people. the Native population in Minneapolis is like 5% but Native people make up almost half the unsheltered homeless population, iirc. the ICE harassment of tribal citizens is not of course limited to unhoused Natives but I think it’s important to see the connections of how these developments are connected to previous and ongoing violence against unhoused people
Even here in Minneapolis, not enough people are aware of the profound cruelty and callousness of our state and municipal institutions towards Native people, the horrific inequity of the homeless population, OR the incredible power of the advocacy and organizing rooted in the Native community, including specifically work by unhoused folks.
here’s the saskatchewan health authority’s most recent statement regarding the incident. there’s a lot of talk but nothing of substance is being said. his family just wants answers and yet they haven’t even been told his time of death. his family also believes that the “imitation firearm” in question is a bright pink and green cigarette holder/lighter, but police refuse to release a photo of it.
according to those who knew him, he was a kind person who always went out of his way to help the less fortunate. he was seeking certification as a social worker and was heavily involved in his community. his family also says that he was against anything that has the potential to cause harm to people.
Nearly blocked someone for a vaguely annoying reply they made in 2017 then remembered 2017 was 9 years ago. They will live. We can change *opens their blog* nevermind they got worse. Guards
tw: talking about potential for harm to or death of animals, no explicit detail
i love ginger the dog. and she got along find with cats in the past. but. her caretakers’ roommates have decided to adopt a bunny. and - and this is not a moral judgement or anything, ginger is a sweet dog, but i Know her - ginger has a pretty high prey drive. and she’s not especially well trained.
and she is clearly, clearly very stressed about the situation, because she Knows there is a creature in the house, one which she is currently not allowed to see. i know she smells it. she was freaking the fuck out about not being allowed out of the room to see it. she wouldn’t calm down, not for anyone, until i laid down and let her settle across my lap/chest.
and like. i know that noise probably stressed out the bunny too. because it is a BUNNY. it’s prey. it’s not meant for loud noise. which, due to the dog and also music playing 24/7, means that bunny is not in a great situation.
like. how are they going to let that thing free roam. it doesn’t deserve to be locked in a room or cage all day, and neither does ginger. why would you bring a tiny one-month-old bunny into a house that is frequently loud, full of weed smoke, and oh yeah, has a dog meant to catch furry pests in it???
i think they plan to introduce them slowly but like. i feel. it was a bit of an under-researched endeavor. to bring that fragile living thing into that particular environment. and i keep seeing very very bad things happening. and i don’t want that bunny to get hurt, or ginger to get blamed for doing what she was bred for. because like i said, her training is… iffy. and it is not fair at all at all at alllllll.
and i don’t Know these roommates! i can’t just say “hey cute rabbit, but i think bringing it here was a really really terrible idea, can i help you rehome it?” without sounding like a bitch. because like. it is Technically not by business. but i desperately, desperately do not want that bunny to get hurt, or for ginger to do something and get treated badly because of it.
i saw the bunny for all of five seconds and simultaneously fell in love with it and felt the screaming urge to say “don’t keep that here!!! you really really should not have that here!!!!!!!!!!!”
my last post has been getting 1 or 2 notes every time i reblog it so i’m remaking it. i’ll try to keep this short but i doubt it
hey everyone, i’m an illustrator that’s been struggling with severe burnout and progressively worsening disability since 2021. i’ve been fighting to get approved for disability benefits since may 2022 and have been denied 5 times already. my mother is also disabled and barely able to work (we live together), we’re in a lot of debt and are struggling to stay afloat. i need to pay my mechanic over $900 to get my car fixed, yesterday my mom’s car battery died on us so now she needs to scrape up $309 to get it replaced. we are struggling to afford groceries, meds, food for my cats, basically most essentials.
i’ve been trying to raise money for my car repairs since october and my posts keep dying and i haven’t been getting much help. i’ve had all this shit weighing over my head for so long and it’s just making me so depressed, like i’m constantly thinking about just how hopeless my situation feels. i just really REALLY need help getting out of this hole. if anyone who has the means can throw a few bucks my way i would be so so thankful. it all adds up and it really means more than i can express. please spread this wherever you can if you can’t help but still want to support me. it means so much! thank you!! 🌈💖
okay tumblr, good job. you placated the one trans woman who was threatening financial action. now go restore the blog of every other tgirl who’s been nuked in the past 6 months
I’m happy for cyprozombiegirl. I really am. but as far as I’m concerned this changes nothing. absolutely. fucking. nothing. a business made a financially beneficial decision while continuing to ignore and even propagate the root cause.
patricia taxxon, salatina, dazeylily, isff, amity kinkyrobotgirl, miss glados innumerable, somepunknamedshae, emmacandle… years or even decades of posts just. gone. and those are only the semi-popular girls or girls in my immediate circle who’s nukes I actually heard about. I know for SURE there are literally hundreds of others who’s names I never knew, and now never will. and that’s a fucking tragedy
fix your shit or die tumblr. you haven’t absolved yet. I won’t forget. WE won’t forget
I said past 6 months because arbitrarily it seems like tumblr has been ramping up the transfem bans within that timeframe but everyone mentioning other girls who have also been termed longer ago is genuinely heartbreaking
none of these girls deserved this. I say again. fix. your. shit. or. die.
bwaghhhhhh small fiber neuropathy can sonk a fat one. i got lightly, lightly tapped on the shoulder and i knew it was a gentle touch. it was literally a very soft course correction from someone behind me while i was dancing, to let me know to move forward.
and i had been in/around the pit, i got hit way harder than that while maintaining the edge of it. but i saw those coming, and for some reason, having a full six foot tall jacked dude fall into me was fine, right? like, hurt a bit, but i knew what i was doing when i put myself there. i like being on the edge of the pit, i can stance up sturdy and throw people back just fine.
but the unexpected tap! i felt it as it was, a quick and light touch. and then a split second later it was like being stabbed with fire. i had to stop dancing and lean on a wall, it was so bad. i’ve gotten clocked in the face and it hurt less.
and i can’t even be mad at the guy who did it, because he didn’t do anything wrong. it’s literally just that i have extensive nerve damage. he was being polite and trying to avoid a more serious collision for both of us. so why! do i think that crash might’ve been less bad actually!
i can still feel it two days later and i’m like… sad. dude. dancing, being at shows, is one of my few fuckin pure happy places. it’s hard on my body and i know that going in, i know. but it’s getting harder and harder to do, and taking longer and longer to recover from.
and little things like this. sore legs and lower back, yes, i expect it. but my left shoulder still feels wrong. not my forearms, which literally took multiple heavy hits. just my shoulder. it’s hard to function for work. and nothing even Really, Really happened. well, a very normal bit of dance etiquette happened. and my body reacts like i’ve been tazed.
i hate it. i hate it. i don’t want to lose that place, or the way i feel when i dance. it’s so important to me. and you can’t exactly ask for a mosh pit to be fuckin disability-friendly and accessible, like, no shit that isn’t happening. but i want to be there! i want to participate! i want to two-step with everybody, i want to wiggle. it makes me so so happy. i can’t be still, that’s not an option, it’s just not.
but like. the amount of pain i am in. the way i can tell i am actively damaging my joints that are already fucked. the way i was tasting blood near the end.
i’m not going to stop going. we’re the only ones who wear masks even though it’s a “punk, community conscious” space, which is bullshit because uhhh get some disability consciousness maybe. and people look at me real funny for it. but i need that time, i need the live music, i need to move recklessly.
i just. i wish it wasn’t taking so much from me. it hurts to need the thing that’s going to grind me down faster.
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