ezcett 

I am opening a big help Journal.

(en) The banks eat up all the money I have earned. I hardly eat, I don't sleep, I only draw. I have to pay a large sum to the bank every month and pay for the apartment.

In total, I need $9950. This is a huge amount, I have been trying to recoup it on my own for the last five years, but I have only managed a little.

Please help me.

You can send a donation here:

Boosty: https://boosty.to/ezcett

Hipolink: https://hipolink.me/ezcett

EasyStart: https://connect.easystaff.io/easylancer/ezcett

In Easy, you make a request, I send you "thank you" and a meme with a cat, you approve. And then I can get your money.

I tried very hard, but my strength is running out.

My cats are healthy and well fed, and I am glad that now I ask for help not for them, but for myself. Because the fear of being hungry and homeless is much less than the fear for my cat children.

I will keep a list of help here. If you donated voluntarily, I will add your name. If you want, I can write down the amounts you contributed.

Where the debts come from: I ran away from home 15 years ago and tried to survive. I have no place to live, I have never had any unnecessary purchases. My friends give me clothes. I spend the money on rent, pills, food for the cats, a little food for myself. I am very tired, and I do not see any light at the end of this endless darkness. I took out loans so that I could have a place to live and something to eat. I took out a loan twice for the treatment of cats. And that's it.

  - I've lost a bit of time here with repairs and fatigue, and, well, you know about the sad events in our furry world. furaffinity has recovered and I can continue working, that's good. But I'll be much more active in this channel now, because I'm afraid that the FA audience will one day lose my contacts.I hope you're doing well :з

UPD: I finally figured out the VPN! It's been a weird week: either the site went down, or I couldn't log into my pages or even look at my messages or even open references for work. In the end, I only drew what I had already saved to my computer, lol, and I was finally able to see everything else only today.I discovered the Opera browser, and spent a long time looking for the apps I needed to work with you painlessly.

For the future: I always have a telegram and discord for communication, you can write to me there. Telegram is better.https://t.me/ezcettart 

I will also add that I will open a couple of slots to order. I need to feed my cats :)

- with love, Ez  

- created a channel (ru) where I show each stage of the renovation. I am interested in watching the transformation of my rented apartment and how much it costs. 

- создала канал, где я показываю каждый этап ремонта. мне самой интересно наблюдать преображение моего жилья и сколько это стоит.

- a month has passed, and I can say that I am in a very, very good and working mood! I am calm and not afraid.

renovation, bags of unsorted things are everywhere, my bed is a mattress on the floor, and I dilute my drawing with a slow cleaning of the old apartment, overgrown with dust, grease and breakdowns. and everything becomes cleaner, a little more comfortable, a little brighter.

the other day I will buy furniture for the kitchen (my kitchen is without furniture, the dishes are in boxes on the floor), a washing machine and a sink for the bathroom (because the one in our house is broken). the plans are to clean everything, make a lot of shelves to place all my things, continue to repair the leaky cracks in the walls, install baseboards everywhere, paint the old coatings.

yesterday after work I planned to sleep, but I couldn’t - in my head there were many options for old kitchen sets that I looked at at a local sale (avito). It's funny how I get so excited just like "I'm buying a new computer or a cool tablet" but about that renovation things, - I want to make my new home cozy so much! And I'm so happy with every step I take.

I'm alive, I'm just currently actively renovating a new rental apartment and moving

  Hello!

in general, I decided to gather up everything that is happening to me into one text. you know that I have problems with money, health and housing, but I can tell you more.

1. I need treatment.

- I have a depressive disorder, which is perfectly controlled by pills that I've been taking for 3+ years. But for the last month I haven't been able to buy them.

- I was diagnosed with a cyst in my ovary, which can be treated with medications, but most likely I will need surgery to remove it. So, I still can’t start treatment due to the lack of time and money.

- I have a bad back. Somewhere in the lumbar spine I have an inflammation, which without treatment can become a hernia. I try to do exercises, maintain good posture and take anti-inflammatory medications, but this is not enough. So far I keep my back in a stable “normal” condition, but it definitely needs to be treated, and the sooner the better.

2. Rent. Our landlord is about to sell the flat where we're living now, and we found a small apartment that needed renovation. Within three weeks I need to clean it up, change the floor, paint the walls, I have already started buying some basic furniture (table, bed, wardrobe, etc.) and building materials. The repairs need to be done quickly and cheaply, because we will be move very soon and we will have to live there somehow. All this requires money.

- с каждым днем мне все больше хочется просто отрисовать последние долги и пойти повеситься. я так больше не могу. бесконечные долги, отсутствие жилья, болезни, которые мне некогда и не на что лечить, отсутствие каких-либо надежд или перспектив в жизни. не вижу смысла крутить это колесо еще 10-20 лет. ради котов, разве что, потому что это моя ответственность. а в остальном будто бы и начинать жить вообще будет некогда. ни в 40, ни в 50.

все надеюсь, что кто-нибудь просто подарит мне квартиру, и я смогу просто начать лечиться. не бояться, что меня выпрут в любой день, не трястись каждый месяц над следующей квартплатой размером в 70% моего дохода. этого, наверное, никогда не будет. я устала. и у меня адски болит спина, но я не могу позволить себе начать ее лечить. внутри где-то растет опухоль, которую тоже надо лечить, а я полгода просто на нее забиваю. в голове снова звенит депрессия, ведь я месяц как допила последние таблетки, потому что на них не хватает. реально, куда проще просто взять и завершить это все. и продолжать будто бы незачем.

спасибо за поддержку, в любом случае. я не знаю, что сюда писать. хотите, могу показать фото ремонта новой убитой хаты, которую мы сняли. могу присылать сюда своих котиков. у меня не осталось скетчей "от вдохновения", потому что вдохновения нет. нет развития комиксов и фанартов. есть только сгущающиеся тучи над моей головой, прогрессирующие болезни, боль. просто боль.

ну и в вов иногда играю, когда не рисую и не сплю. 

а больше в моей жизни ничего нет.