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Meh day, feel free to ignore.
4 years ago
General
Today is really one of those "Should I bother" days.
I know I shouldn't, but I see other people who're stupidly popular, constantly get messages from people, who people seem to truly like;
And it makes me wonder what I've done wrong in life; when I'm lucky to hear from anyone on a given day. Certainly I next to never hear from anyone unless I initiate it. I mean.. I try to be a good person and a good friend? I do my damnest to be available for folks, to do what I can
And I spend almost every day alone; even when I reach out I'm lucky to get a reply; almost never the one who GETS messaged/called. so I just spend often days sat on my own wondering and worrying if I'm the fault. I probably am.
Eh, another thought that'll get lost in the void, but it helps to type it.
Just tired I suppose of almost constantly being alone. But hey ho; not an artist, not rich so cant shower commissions on people or buy their affection as others do. Most of the 'big' names who aren't artists and who people love are the ones dropping thousands a month on dozens of pieces and giving friends loads of shit.
I'm just a useless cunt from the UK who struggles most months to get one done.
To be honest, when the last of the characters I've had for sale gets paid for and goes to it's new owner; I've honestly thought of just shutting down my accounts on here, twitter n such and goingcompletely silent again. Been trying for twenty years and got nowhere. Probably time to call it quits.
I know I shouldn't, but I see other people who're stupidly popular, constantly get messages from people, who people seem to truly like;
And it makes me wonder what I've done wrong in life; when I'm lucky to hear from anyone on a given day. Certainly I next to never hear from anyone unless I initiate it. I mean.. I try to be a good person and a good friend? I do my damnest to be available for folks, to do what I can
And I spend almost every day alone; even when I reach out I'm lucky to get a reply; almost never the one who GETS messaged/called. so I just spend often days sat on my own wondering and worrying if I'm the fault. I probably am.
Eh, another thought that'll get lost in the void, but it helps to type it.
Just tired I suppose of almost constantly being alone. But hey ho; not an artist, not rich so cant shower commissions on people or buy their affection as others do. Most of the 'big' names who aren't artists and who people love are the ones dropping thousands a month on dozens of pieces and giving friends loads of shit.
I'm just a useless cunt from the UK who struggles most months to get one done.
To be honest, when the last of the characters I've had for sale gets paid for and goes to it's new owner; I've honestly thought of just shutting down my accounts on here, twitter n such and goingcompletely silent again. Been trying for twenty years and got nowhere. Probably time to call it quits.
As for messages, I would be happy to poke ya more. I'm the sort of person I almost never message anyone because I (perhaps wrongly) assume that I would just be annoying them, so I let them message me. You're always fun to talk with. ^_^
There is also how I sometimes feel worried that I may be stalking others...