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Meaning of my life (A present for you, future self!)
4 years ago
General
Originally sparked by https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/10115580/
I see human endgame as a place full of life, light and peace. Fulfilling even when shadowed by great struggles. A time without regret or doubt, bright and uplifting. To achieve this I need to do it myself: friends, connections, family, random people, everything! I need to assume a certain... path and way to live and keep trying till the end, making life better for as many people as possible in the process.
To know what to do, who to become and how to do it I need wisdom, which is extracted from EVERY experience with quiet thinking and calm attention, or learned - carefully and patiently. I also need to develop as wide of a skillset as possible to be able to bring ideas into this world once I arrive at them. Last but arguably the best - I need to max out my attempts to maximize my chances. And all the methods and goals are regularly given a chance to be re-allined or adjusted to keep a sharp mind, able body and strong spirit.
What do I live for? I live for THE TRUTH, the ever-present, all-encompassing underlying truth, found everywhere! For example: when I look - I want to see the full beauty, not just of the object that I'm looking at, but the vast and pure infinite beauty that is there. I want to really know it, to become the conduit, feel it flowing through... The more I try - the more sensitive to it I become, more deeply I engage with it, more closely I understand it. Some details I've witnessed are impossible to tell, they can only be felt. And I don't care if I'm far or not, that it's impossible to reach. The most important thing is to keep moving towards it. This process is the greatest source of meaning and joy in my life. In a way, life as an activity, as a process - IS the meaning of life (it's kinda built-in, hidden in a plain sight). At the moment I find myself to be aiming my activity towards beauty and some other particular things. To keep this possible I'll work to live, I'll live to work, I'll live at work - whatever happens, it'll be worth as long as I know what I care about and am giving it my most.
I'd like to have my own family, as the procreation IS the main quest of this game. I mean, the emotion transform people when they become parents... It's too... legendary to not try it, you know. Kids are the immortality you could have. Not as a person, but as life itself! I need to experience as many things as I can, do as much good as I can, and who's best to share that with? My own children!
What I currently have in my life is really good. It feels like that because it has stopped being really bad (which it was for ~6 years, up to ~2 years ago), and I made that happen: tried to not make same mistakes, did what worked for me, kept trying. I'm happy of my success and I won't stop. Which means it's only getting better! My optimism is actually practical now, not "stupid" as it was for so long.....
I see human endgame as a place full of life, light and peace. Fulfilling even when shadowed by great struggles. A time without regret or doubt, bright and uplifting. To achieve this I need to do it myself: friends, connections, family, random people, everything! I need to assume a certain... path and way to live and keep trying till the end, making life better for as many people as possible in the process.
To know what to do, who to become and how to do it I need wisdom, which is extracted from EVERY experience with quiet thinking and calm attention, or learned - carefully and patiently. I also need to develop as wide of a skillset as possible to be able to bring ideas into this world once I arrive at them. Last but arguably the best - I need to max out my attempts to maximize my chances. And all the methods and goals are regularly given a chance to be re-allined or adjusted to keep a sharp mind, able body and strong spirit.
What do I live for? I live for THE TRUTH, the ever-present, all-encompassing underlying truth, found everywhere! For example: when I look - I want to see the full beauty, not just of the object that I'm looking at, but the vast and pure infinite beauty that is there. I want to really know it, to become the conduit, feel it flowing through... The more I try - the more sensitive to it I become, more deeply I engage with it, more closely I understand it. Some details I've witnessed are impossible to tell, they can only be felt. And I don't care if I'm far or not, that it's impossible to reach. The most important thing is to keep moving towards it. This process is the greatest source of meaning and joy in my life. In a way, life as an activity, as a process - IS the meaning of life (it's kinda built-in, hidden in a plain sight). At the moment I find myself to be aiming my activity towards beauty and some other particular things. To keep this possible I'll work to live, I'll live to work, I'll live at work - whatever happens, it'll be worth as long as I know what I care about and am giving it my most.
I'd like to have my own family, as the procreation IS the main quest of this game. I mean, the emotion transform people when they become parents... It's too... legendary to not try it, you know. Kids are the immortality you could have. Not as a person, but as life itself! I need to experience as many things as I can, do as much good as I can, and who's best to share that with? My own children!
What I currently have in my life is really good. It feels like that because it has stopped being really bad (which it was for ~6 years, up to ~2 years ago), and I made that happen: tried to not make same mistakes, did what worked for me, kept trying. I'm happy of my success and I won't stop. Which means it's only getting better! My optimism is actually practical now, not "stupid" as it was for so long.....
