it's actually so crazy how much the simpsons would fucking suck if it didn't have any of the simpsons characters. just a bunch of shots of empty houses and streets for half an hour while nothing happens. that would be so badddd lol

#google translate does not capture the tone switch so i have to say. first two sentences are like. normal maybe kind of feminine posting tone #& the last is like. shounen manga protagonist. action movie hero. jojo's bizarre adventure character. #the tone you would use if you were holding a gun with the safety off (– @chadlesbianjasontodd)

Fantasy worldbuilding concept:

- Magic can be used to repair equipment in a manner akin to the mending cantrip from 5e, but it's considered profane black magic for reasons that surely have nothing to do with the fact that the lead manufacturer of leather armor in the realm is close personal friends with both the witchfinders and the king

The initial plan for this was for this to boost profits since leather can't be repaired in the same way steel armor can (at least not up to the standard of durability the original piece had), facilitating the need to replace armor pieces for much higher prices than repairing them would be

However since then leather armor sales have actually sort of nosedived, since while leather armor was useful for heavy adventuring work in the days of magical repair, it's also tragically frail compared to steel and it's just not really financially viable to replace your armor every few quests.

Since you can no longer magically fix your shit on the fly, You're really much better off with steel nowadays, or just using whatever you find in dungeons

This nosedive in profit has forced leather armor to spike in price for the manufacturers to stay afloat, and the original market for it (adventurers who wanted a cheaper alternative to steel) can no longer afford what was once the "cheaper" option

Nowadays the leather armor industry stays afloat almost entirely by wealthy collectors who prefer the aesthetic or well-off adventurers who place much higher emphasis on their mobility than the average person

Or wide-eyed newcomers to the scene they can sucker in with a fabricated mythologized image of a heroic level one adventurer that's been unfeasable-at-best to achieve for nearly a decade now

HELL YEAH

dry humping in its specificity as a term implies the existence of wet humping

not my best work

everyone quit reblogging with "investing" and "making this blow up". that only happens to blogs that are already big. my posts sit squarely at 2 notes apiece and so it shall remain

This is poetry. This is storytelling. You can leave the sound off if you want but. Stop. Watch. You surely will not regret doing so.

was visiting a friend who has a farm, and one of the chickens has a home made flared cone on, so i asked what was up with that and she said "that's diesel, and she's suicidal" so obviously i went ??? and she pressed the door lock on her truck fob so the truck beeped, and this dumbass bird SPRINTED full tilt across the garden to shove her head in the tailpipe. she has to be locked up and coned so she doesn't gulp down toxic fumes direct from the pipe for some idiot bird reason. she is obsessed with doing this and has to be locked up any time someone is using a vehicle.

i told her i posted about this and she has an update (which i guess content warning for animal harm [the animal did it to it's damn fool self])

she found this out the first time when she auto-started her truck to warm it up before work one below-freezing morning and came out ~5 minutes later to find (the then unnamed) diesel with her head stuffed in the tail pipe hanging limply by her idiot neck and thought that she was dead, ran over and pulled her out, and the chicken went "oh hi! anyways mind if i get back in there?" and did it a-fucking-gain??

best guess is bc she feeds her chickens with a pvc gravity pipe like this

and despite having ~40 other chickens who don't fuck this up, diesel went "food comes from tubes, this is tube, ∴ this is the ~secret~ food hole that the others do not know about. i will be rewarded with golden seed for being the cleverest of them all :)" and is now on 24/7 vehicle related suicide watch. fine line between docile and dumb sometimes.

my artists rendition of the morning in question

Autistic birds from a popular cozy game

girl who is normal voice: calling off off work is so humiliating. why wasn't i stronger

my reading goal in 2026 is to have fun and be myself

"its a living" <- guy who has a job it hates

"its'a living!' <- dr mario frankenstein

One under-appreciated breed of fic writer are the ones who hyperfocus on logistics to the exclusion of all canon shortcuts, and thus usually strike upon an awesome way to flesh out the worldbuilding or characters.

Like, I’m not necessarily talking realism here since often it’s still pretty far from realistic, but more like, “someone has to be running spies in this fantasy kingdom, and we’ve seen the whole royal court, so which background character is it? How does that change these three major interactions?” Or “real life historical nobility did in fact have some things to do that were like jobs, how does this human disaster cope with running an estate?” Or “there’s no reason for a sci-fi robot detective to know how to whitewater kayak, where’d she learn?” Or “if this guy is serving the emperor directly he has to be way high up in the space empire servant hierarchy, why is he doing this menial task for someone else? What’s his motive? Does he perhaps have the secret space telepathy?”

Anyway I’m always DELIGHTED to find a fic or writer who asks these questions because the fics themselves are universally bangers.

person who knows how logistical things works has picked up the cannon, hefted it thoughtfully, and put a single chalk mark precisely on the problem.

Once i read all of golden age and silver age and bronze age and pre-crisis in general and post crisis and new52 and rebirth and all the different events and crossovers and learn all of the writers’ histories so i am aware of their biases and influences when creating those stories and familiarise myself with the cultural/social/political climate of when those comics were written to be able to understand and analyse them well from both a watsonian and doylist perspective it’s over for you all

Quagsire & Clodsire (2025) - TCG Pocket Backdrop
Illustrator: HYOGONOSUKE