i use the terms alas and i fear far too much i fear. but alas

twilight is basically just “why go to therapy and work through your trauma when you could just be a traumatized vampire instead”

they should invent a way for online friends to come over and hang out that doesn't involve money or travelling

classic rock song youtube comments section is like girlblogging for wistful divorced dads

this post will find you when it needs to find you.

just some facts: you are loved. you are not alone. you are valuable. you are worthy of good things. you are deserving of self love and forgiveness. i’m glad you’re still here.

veganconnor

things that made me stop wanting to die that require no effort whatsoever

  • change the color used to highlight text on your laptop
  • move the pictures on your wall
  • stack whatever clutter is in your room into piles even if you don’t have time to clean it all
  • slightly vary your commute, even just by one street
  • change where you sit and scroll aimlessly on your phone even if it’s only to the chair in your room instead of your bed
  • drink water or juice out of a wine glass in the morning because nothing is real
  • shower with the lights off, without music
  • buy $3 flowers at trader joe’s—they look bad next to the more expensive ones but they look so good in your room
  • start typing things you don’t post into your notes. your thoughts can be worth documenting even if you don’t deem them worth sharing
  • wake up super early just once. you don’t have to make it a habit it’s just extra satisfying to go to bed that night
  • listen to the entirety of your favorite album from 2015

Almost all of these are about variety. Humans need stimulation! We need enrichment! We literally cannot do the same thing every day!

The other day I was feeling miserable, so I hopped on a bus and rode it all the way back to where I’d started, and my brain, which had finally had some proper stimulation via new environments, was suddenly ready to go again!

This is why taking walks/drives and trying new hobbies are good for you! Don’t turn yourself into a sad zoo animal! You need some pumpkins to roll around in your enclosure!

ITS BACK!!!!!

god i fucking love the quote “dont turn yourself into a sad zoo animal” it has really inspired me!

i do feel somewhat ruined forever. but it’s okay we stay silly

i hope you get through all your trauma anniversaries with as little pain as possible, and i hope the pain lessens even more next year

My parents taught me to go to the bathroom to calm down if I was feeling overwhelmed which was good advice for an autistic child but now i have some trouble leaving bathrooms. They're such a perfect safe space. No one is allowed to bother you. It's like the womb

I identify the most with the woman who has a green velvet ribbon around her neck and keeps being like "DONT untie my neck ribbon or something really bad will happen" and then her husband unties the ribbon and her head falls off. this is extremely real to me. spent my whole life like "please don't do this thing to me or really bad stuff will happen" and everyone around me being like "that sounds fake" and doing it anyway. and then my head fell off!

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