i neeeeed more fics with the girls doing the most insane shit ever. physically, i mean. like. idk how to phrase this but im actually sick to death of girls being cute i need them to go camping & for rumi to dig a hole for six hours & come back covered in dirt & for mira & zoey to be like how was it babe & rumis like. thumbs up. gonna cut down a huuuuuge tree tomorrow do u wanna watch

also like. the whats the word for a face without makeup. bare faced? that was HUGE. & how they belch & shove food in their mouths. i need them to have a belching competition. i need them to stare into an empty fridge & be like. we're gonna PERISH. do u think i can eat this...........cucumber? (half melted from age). from another room: OMG DO IT. from ten hours later: livestreaming from the hospital hey hunterssss we are totally fine but just a psa if u see a cucumber that looks like THIS (photo) DONT EAT IT

some brave fan reaches out & is like. were u guys ok? & zoey replies w sad face. my ass exploded

rumi edits a photo of zoey to have no ass like literally just photoshops the ass out & tweets it. sad face. her ass exploded

fans throw a funeral for #koreas ass & miras like SHES ALSO HALF AMERICAN DONT FORGET & all the tweets get edited like. immediately. sad face. her korean-american ass exploded

rumi tweets AGAIN the next morning. email from celine @ 2.13 am: no more ass exploding tweets

the screenshot has her listed as celine (eomma) which. privately causes a HUGE tail spin & whatever. but the fans are like aw thats cute. do u have another celine in ur phone? so rumi tweets a screenshot of her celine contacts n its just like. every time celine changes her phonenumber rumi doesnt bother to delete it she just renames it smth wild so its like:

celine (abducted by aliens)
celine (abducted by ghosts)
celine (bad haircut)
celine (bungee jumping in cancun)
celine (cat whisperer)
celine (hair stylist ACTUAL HAIR STYLIST CELINE)
celine (dogs ate her sadface.emoji)
celine (wrong number)
celine (wrong number 2)

maybe like three years later theyre in an interview & the host is like girls what is ur greatest fear & zoey lunges for the mic & they have to wrestle it off her but she gets it & shes like OKAY SO YEARS AGO - DONT YOU DARE TACKLE ME RUMI - YEARS AGO I ATE THIS NASTY CUCUMBER - MIRA STAY WHERE YOU ARE IM SERIOUS I'LL PUT MILK IN YOUR FAKE MILK - I ATE THIS NAAAASTY CUCUMBER AND WENT TO THE HOSPITAL & MY GREATEST FEAR IS THAT THE CUCUMBER IS OUT THERE SOMEWHERE & IT'S GONNA COME BACK FOR ME. n the girls stop trying to steal the mic back bc like. it IS what they thought she would talk about but its NOT what they thought she would say n rumi is like

what do you mEAN its out there?

& zoeys like. its a demon cucumber. it was unholy what it did to me. you were there, you remember

rumi: i quite literally will never forget

zoey: it wasnt natural. its out there. alive. waiting. waiting for me to lower my guard

mira: i actually hate that im never gonna be able to eat cucumber again. because you're right

zoey: BECAUSE IM RIGHT

host: lets cut this, hm?

months post half-demon rumi reveal. zoey is standing in her doorway n rumis like oh hey whats up babe

zoeys, uncommonly serious: rumi. i need u to be honest with me

rumis: omg????? okay?? yes ofc??

zoey: did u poison me with that demon cucumber four years ago

rumi: okay goodnight zoey

zoey: DID YOU DO IT. DID MY BELOVED GIRLFRIEND TRY TO KILL ME

rumi: it wasnt a demon it was rotten

zoey: ..... but did u -

rumi: NO. i didnt leave it there & i didnt tell u to eat it & also i didnt try to poison you????

zoey: ... will u protect me from-

rumi: if there is such a thing as a demon cucumber. i will protect you with my fucking life. but there isnt. and i didnt poison you

zoey: okay. i believe you. and i love you

later, when a horde of demon cucumbers attacks them

rumi & mira: what the fuck

zoey: I KNEW IT

mira, pacing in their bedroom: what does this MEAN though. not just for our ancient classifications of demons but like. the hospitalisation. she DID eat it. can you . eat demons? are they poisonous? is she ACTUALLY okay? what the fuck?

rumi, on the edge of the bed. elbows on knees, fingers steepled. ten thousand yard stare: i.....i dont know.

i just feel like the thing i would do immediately after finding out i still had magic honmoon powers but didnt need to fight demons anymore is that i would probably try to figure out what is the biggest dog i can hold in my arms & carry like a baby.

i want rumi to decline the invitation to throw the first pitch at a baseball game like 6 years in a row & then shes like fuck it. im normal (uncertain looks from her girls) & then shes like in the practice & her throws are BAD & miras like. remember when u were like. maybe i will use the shin kal & then the honmoon immediately gave u a sword instead. & rumis like ok so my aim isnt amazing. zoey u do it instead & zoey nervous laughs shes like OH I DONT KNOW ABOUT THAT & miras like no thats fantastic. ive always wanted to see zoey make someone cry on live tv & goes a little dreamy eyed about it & zoeys like ok haha im ALSO normal

anyway shes a terrifying pitcher & then rumi bats her eyes n shes like could i take a swing & then zoey pitches for her & rumis like. haha this is what breaking the sound barrier sounds like yall & hits it so hard that it breaks a window in the closest building (not very close)

@kchzndrvh i love all of this but also u put orienteering in mind when u mentioned the scavenger hunt n i am obsessed with the idea of them going on their weird hikes in the wilderness & just like. parkouring off shit & naruto running jumping from branch to branch & zoey pausing mournfully on a cliffside & the girls are like. zoey? you okay? & shes like. bawling silently & shes like . i just thinki would be so good at being raised by wolves, you know? & theyre like. im gonna push u off this cliff actually

anyway back to my main point which was @ myself. please feel free to make them grosser in your fics. make them burp, make them dirty, make them sweat, grunt, sneeze, make them have weird annoying habits. the storytellers & animators knew it was so important to make them barefaced sometimes & hungry burping imperfect girls n i love that so much . let them be annoying. let them suck. let them fall apart. push it a little further than is comfortable. make them really angry. make them really sad. make them really annoying & let them love each other anyway. how wonderful. THREE girls!!!!!!! our main characters!!!!! all of them!!!!! (turns into a dreamy eyed little ghost & floats into the sky to never be seen again)

rumi going radio silent on all social media abt a month or so after the IDOL awards & the fans arent sure how to feel about it bc on the one hand, rumi isnt replying even with her cursory like. purple love hearts on a few messages or liking sweet tweets after concerts. but they arent DOING concerts while theyre on hiatus so maybe shes just really taking the rest period seriously!!! & mira & zoey are still posting stuff & talking about rumi so everythings fine, right?

& then one day randomly she just starts using social media again & everyoen is like. so glad that u are back, did u have a fun break, why did u stop using social media did u just need a break?

& rumis like oh i got banned

& fans are like YOU GOT BANNED? BY FAKETWITTER?

& rumis like lol no zoey & mira banned me from using my phone

& some fans are like whoa controlling much

& rumis like. perish? they were right

& zoeys like we had to take her electronics off her bc she kept taking them apart. rumi started watching self repair videos to relax on our hiatus & then took it way too seriously & now all of the stuff in our house has been pulled apart

rumi: AND PUT BACK TOGETHER. BETTER.

n the whole world thinks that rumi just. broke everything but then miras like. maybe a year later posting a video about rumi at some private graduation ceremony & she looks so chuffed w herself & its like. rumi graduating her mechanical engineering degree w honours & everyeone is like WHAT IS HAPPENING & miras like lol turns out rumi cant take a break anyway she decided to get her phd isnt that sick

lazy live stream with mira as shes going through her make up or smth w fans just chill & then zoey appears in the doorway & miras like hey babe whats up

& zoeys like. how many backflips do u think i can do in a row

& miras like. hm. 12?

& zoeys like. surely its more than that

& mira shrugs shes like idk lets go see

& chat is SCREAMING at them bc they dont go to the studio or anything where theres mats or anything they just go into the living room & start doing backflips both of them & rumi teleports into her bedroom & comes out & shuts down the livestream & shes like. are u guys for real & miras like. i bet we can do more than u & rumis like. fuck u. ten billion backflips jutsu & zoey sneaks miras phone back out & starts filming again & theyre just standing next to rumi & chanting as she does a billion backflips

every time rumi does a backflip they yell the number & then zoey looks straight into the camera & shakes her head so the chat knows she doesnt approve of anyone doing this kind of thing without appropraite safety measures

I FORGOT THEYRE SINGERS.

videos of them in their private pool which. already. awooga. but one of them isnt in the video & chat is like. wheres zoey? & mira doesnt look up from her magazine & just . Points. at the pool & theres this little blur of colour where zoey is underwater & chat is getting more & more nervous n theyre like RUMI. RUMI SHES DROWNING. & rumis like. this isnt about zoey. & keeps rambling about some train engine shes been studying & then zoey is totally fine & puts her head up & shes like. MIRA . HOW LONG WAS THAT? & mira clicks her timer & shes like. twenty three minutes. good job. & zoeys like AW MAN. the world record is twenty nine & mira shrugs shes like. ok. down u go & zoey waggles her eyebrows & then sinks under the water & blows bubbles out of her nose when rumi leans over to film her

ok this is a dumb question maybe but ive never seen a kpop concert. is it like a western concert still in the way that sometimes the performeres will like. stop. & just chat to the audience? tell a little story as instruments get set up or whatever?

IF SO. rumi popping a squat as the stage hands bring her piano on stage & shes like. hey hunters how are we doing tonight & they HOWL at her & stomp their feet & scream & shes just. grinning up at them & shes like. im gonna teach u a song ok & she teaches them a call & reply song its super simple but its based on like the ancient hunter song or whatever & they can feeeeeel the honmoon bursting with energy & rumi winks at the audience & is like. just keep going , just like that, you're doing perfect. & then she parkours up onto the safety rail & grabs the dangling ring that she uses for golden & effortlessly hauls herself up onto it & half the audience is like ooooo her arms & the other half are like aaaaaa her abs & mira & zoey are like aw no fair theres no room so zoey climbs onto miras shoulders & grabs rumis ankles & theyre essentially standing on each others shoulders & bobby has to come out on stage & heatedly whisper at them THIS IS NOT SAFE. NOT SAFE AT ALL. & miras lets go of zoeys ankles & claps her hands & shes like hey everyone this is bobby say hi to bobby & he goes pink & waves at the audience but is like i am SERIOUS girls get down NOW & rumi sighs but shes like okay whatever u say bobby & its like a circus act she like spins on the rail like its a trapeze bar & flips & flips & flips & lands & they basically turn a huge section of the honmoon gold bc theyre being stupid. & because mira puts her hand on zoeys ass to keep her balanced & for No Other Reason according to official huntrx press

theres this element of performance that comes free with womanhood. this expectation that follows you wherever you go & the degree to which these girls would be Performing in their lives as literal idols & singers & performers & also HIDING STUFF from a lot of people. its the perfect interrogation of this aspect, dont you think? when you can lean into it & exaggerate it to a hyperbolic state so you can explore well, it IS a little silly, dont you think? to never have faults or fears. to always look & act & sound perfect. that if you are perfect enough, that if your songs are good enough & you sell enough to fans & they LOVE you, that will save the world. of course its a vvery hopeful message, that songs & art can save the world, which is the intention. but when you think about rumi & how hard shes trying & hiding, its important, dont you think, to consider the expectations & the reality of what failure means. its not just that her best friends will likely kill her, its that if she makes a mistake, if anyone sees her as less than this perfect ideal, perfect idol, she dooms the world. so. keep on a full face of makeup. keep on a smile. keep your tone pleasant even when someone is being rude to you. be polite and charming and pretty.

in fact may i add; goofy retching noises & ALSO. allowed to openly lust after the saja boys. sure it was goofily done but it was obvious & it was clear even if they hated them (demons) that there was attraction there! that’s pretty cool for an animated movie & also just like. i feel like it’s cool for a show about girls where it’s like purely physical attraction

when girls like horses we call them ‘horse girls’ and mock them for their bond with giant nightmare leg-finger creatures

but if boys like horses we call them ‘future cowboys’ and ‘rugged outdoors men’

I’m just saying, I’ve met a lot more horse girls than horse boys so when the dystopic breakdown of society hits us, it’s not going to be roving bands of young men on horseback (they don’t know how to ride, they haven’t B O N D ED)

it will be Kelly from elementary school and her band of fifty midwest girls in pink cowgirl boots who have come for your resources

Wanna know a fun fact?

When they were filming Lord of the Rings, they needed A LOT of extras to be able to ride horses into battle. They couldn’t find nearly enough men with horses/ riding skills, so they hired just like a crap ton of women who were expert riders, slapped some beards on ‘em, and called it good. The VAST majority of the riders in that film are horse girls. Horse girls win battles.

Horse girls win battles.

Your comments mean something even when the author never replies.

Sometimes your comments mean something especially when the author never replies.

exactly this

You will never 100% idiotproof your creative work & if you try to, you will only succeed in smothering the soul out of it. btw

(Huntr/x's penthouse apartment, sometime hopefully in the near future)

Rumi, checking her emails: Bills, fanmail, bills, stupid ad deals, something that probably should have gone to Bobby, fanmail... oh huh. Someone is asking if they can make a parody of one or more of our songs.

Mira: People already do that, don't they? We encourage it.

Rumi: Yeah, but this guy's asking anyway.

Mira: Huh. That's considerate of them. Who is it?

Rumi: Some parody artist named Alfred Yankovic.

Mira: Oh, I think I've heard of him, isn't he kind of a big deal in the states-

Zoey, kicking open the door: YES YES YES TELL HIM YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES A MILLION TIMES YES LET HIM DO WHATEVER HE WANTS WITH OUR MUSIC

Mira: Definitely a big deal.

Zoey: ASK HIM IF HE'S DOING A POLKA MEDLEY PLEASE I NEED TO HEAR GOLDEN ON THE ACCORDION THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE OH MY GOSH DO YOU THINK HE'LL LET ME CAMEO IN THE MUSIC VIDEO-

Rumi: So... we tell him yes?

Mira: We tell him yes.

Zoey: EEEEEEEEEEE WEIRD AL KNOWS WHO I AM THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE

I'm just saying... Rumi wears two padlocks on her wrist during the Idol Awards...

"Oh, but they probably didn't put those outfits together themselves, it doesn't mean any thin-"

NO. WRONG! You know why?

Becasue she's still wearing them in the fuckin spotify wrapped video.

That is a specific choice made post-release of the movie. That was a choice damnnit!

the ao3 lyric video strikes again

THIS HAD NO BUSINESS BEING AS FUCKING HILARIOUS AS IT WAS

someone said mira can't be a lesbian

so now mira is a trans guy that can kiss girls and be straight

Perfect audio choice

I am so, so sure that my cousin meant to type something else, but I'm going to cry. Welcome to my bathroom themed bathroom... Pictures of other people's bathrooms on the walls... Little bathtub figurines on the sink... Soap dispenser shaped like a toilet... Life could be a dream... in my bathroom themed bathroom...