a blog for non-SAM aros, "just aros", and more

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

FAQ

I get a fair amount of asks with the same few questions, so I’m gonna pin this post:

oriented aro coining post: here!

What does loveless aro mean?

(x) briefly: loveless aromanticism is a relatively new term, and has no solid definition yet. however, my personal definition is as follows.

aromantic individuals who reject the idea that “love” is necessary to be good. This is often correlated with not experiencing multiple forms of attraction, whether romantic, sexual, platonic, alterous/queerplatonic, or otherwise.

What does non-SAM aro mean?

non-Split Attraction Model aromantic; the SAM is a model that, at its most basic, splits attraction into romantic and sexual orientations. a non-SAM asexual simply identifies as asexual, a non-SAM aro simply identifies as aromantic.

Isn’t non-SAM aro or non-SAM ace just aroace?

They are not synonymous with aroace; I experience sexual attraction but cannot separate that from my aromantic orientation in a meaningful way. I do not want to be described with sexual orientation terminology.

If you’re wondering if you may be aromantic, I strongly advise checking out my “am i aro” tag on @aro-culture-is

Pinned Post aro aromantic actually aro actually aromantic text loveless aro non-sam aro
growinguparo
noromofest

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Introducing "No Romo" Fest: a creative celebration of aromanticism 💚

Let's celebrate Valentine's Day with our own definition of love (or a lack thereof)! No Romo Fest is a creative event taking place from February 8th to 14th, open to anyone and everyone who would like to center aromanticism in their work.

Works can be posted under the #no romo fest tag and/or in the AO3 collection throughout the week.

Guidelines & (optional) prompts below the cut:

Keep reading

asexual-society
aro-bird

Here's me begging people again to learn the difference because I've been seeing more and more people confuse these terms when discussing some things in the ace community:

  • Sex-Favorable - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being fine and even enthusiastic in engaging in sex and other sexual acts. Often confused by some as Sex-Positivity.
  • Sex-Positive - A moral or political position that refers to a positive outlook on sex as something positive and something that should not be shamed for any consenting persons regardless of their own personal feelings towards sexual acts on themselves.
  • Sex-Indifferent - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being indifferent in engaging in sex and other sexual acts.
  • Sex-Neutral - A moral or political position that refers to an indifferent outlook on sex. They may not have strong feelings about it one way or another.
  • Sex-Averse - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being averse in engaging in sex and other sexual acts. Often confused by some as sex-repulsion.
  • Sex-Repulsed - A descriptor that refers to a person's personal feelings about engaging in the act of sex that specifically refers to them being repulsed or disgusted by thoughts or material related to sex. This has no bearing on their own political/moral position on sex. Often confused by some as Sex-Aversion or even Sex-Negativity.
  • Sex-Negative - A moral or political position that refers to a negative view on sex as something negative and something that should be forbidden and only be a means of procreation. Some people who are sex-negative may only view it as a way to procreate so people who engage in the activity without any plans of procreation (and especially members of the queer community) may be deemed as immoral or even evil.

If we're going to have proper discussions of these things, please please please can we use the proper terms. I need to stop feeling fight or flight whenever I see someone trying to vent about "some rude sex-positive aces" or see someone proclaim that they're "sex-negative" like I'm serious. I keep on having to double-take whenever I have to read posts and discussions because of this.

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aromantic-aurea

AUREA is looking for new Social Media Team members!

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Join us in helping amplify aromantic voices by:

  • Creating and scheduling content for AUREA
  • Engaging with posts from other LGBTQIA+ organizations
  • Communicating with and supporting AUREA’s online community

Basic experience with social media platforms is preferred.

Interested? Learn more about the roles at https://buff.ly/fL4pbEY or email us with questions!

squidfreak

Anonymous asked:

aro culture is thinking that aroace should be the default for all kids, not heterosexual. aroace until proven otherwise

aro-culture-is answered:

tbh i think that maybe we don’t need to assume people’s orientations

squidfreak

What a strange thing to say!

headphonesgal

i believe the point that anon makes is to abolish heteronormativity. not assuming others' personal attaction while being pushy about who they love would be a relief for queer people who do not conform to amatonormativity.

i also understand it is better not to assume — i can definitely apply that to my own behavior — but it is in many people's nature to be judgmental, and i think it is infinitely better for the standard to frame the subject as a neutral "not attracted" until they decide to openly take action ("proven otherwise")

squidfreak

I called it infantilizing because often people see aroace(spec) identities as something only minors identify as, a "phase," including in headcanons for fictional minors it's always aroace.

idk. I find this strange, I find assuming and trying to make a new default for orientation assumptions strange. I think moving towards a "I don't care as long as you're happy" mindset would be awesome but it seems that won't be happening any time soon lol

just-aro

imho it is not infantilizing to say it in the context of “I wish the default was like me, so I would feel less alone/targeted/weird”, but it still feels like a strange way to approach it, which is why we replied to it and didn’t strictly post it as it was.

generally, it’s worth recognizing that the context of our blog is submitted by folks who are often… in their feels, so to speak, and so we try to not totally dismiss or put folks down as much as expand on their idea with alternatives. It’s not weird to wish to be understood - and I think that’s the core of the feelings that motivated this anon. I try to always assume an anon is, for example, a young teen who maybe is new to this, but wants desperately to fit in somewhere, and may not know all the ideas and language and work in aro spaces.

They may say things like this anon, where folks who have been around the block are inclined to wince because there are some folks who infantilize a-spec folks. But tbh, that’s not something everyone has experienced and knows about. I try to assume they just… want to be seen, and redirect. All that to say, unless someone is outright rude, our blog tries to educate and not assume malice.

sorry for the length I just don't like the aggression that calling them weird comes across as here and I get that folks 100% can be Weird As Fuck and maybe you have more experience with that but tbh having run this blog since like. 2019? folks just Do Not Know Things. this type of blog attracts a lot of folks who are new to the community and still learning like. so many we have had points where every tenth ask was a 'can I be aro if [classic aro experience]?' so it is rarely worth our energy to assume malice