who tf is thunderclan i only know emeraldclan

A collection of sonic and friends as real animals B) would love to make these into stickers one day

Names taken literally

I like to imagine that Blaze doesn't know how to use a phone camera

-No one. The whole thing was faked (JUST LIKE THE MOON LANDING) by Pink Diamond herself who was just goddamn sick and tired of dealing with Yellow and Blue’s shit for all of eternity because c’mon, look at them, you’d rather pretend to be dead too.

1/8/18 - HONESTLY THIS JOKE POST IS BECOMING A STRONG CONTENDER RIGHT NOW

5/7/18 - FUCK!!! FUCK!!!! FUCK????? FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!

channeling the absolute vibe whiplash I'm feeling after binging all of Prime for the first time over the summer before Crossworlds released with Prime characters as DLC LMAO

if they ever wanna use Nine's character again for something else, I think they should canonize him having stuck around after they all went go-karting. he was too embarrassed to tell anyone so he just like crept off to live in the sewers. after all the drama, it was just kinda awkward to admit living alone in the desert forever was actually pretty sad and boring ...

Tumblr should have a mode where you can accept to have random posts show up on your dash. Like I mean it chooses a random post made on the site since it was created to occasionally show on your dash, not taking tags popularity content deactivated accounts reblogs or anything into account. Just purely rng.

Could be fun

I am losing it! Look at them! She's carrying her!

guess who got accidentally smushed flat onto my desk because she silently sat by my right hand and is the perfect shape of a computer mouse

Wouldn't the cup at least have the whipped cream and milk in the ice cream? Or the straw

"we want to protect the kids!!"

— in a way that will also protect them from their parents & guardians right?

"what"

— if a parent or guardian wanted to abuse their child, would what you're trying to do make it harder for them?

"..."

— *pulls out a chart that shows 76% of abused children were victimized by a parent or legal guardian* will what you're advocating for make it easier for the majority child abusers, which is overwhelmingly parents & guardians, to get away with abuse?

"idk what this has to do with anything we just want to restrict children's freedoms more & give parents more control over them. you know. to protect them from adults who want to abuse them"

Every. Single. Time.

this one a little old

Can we just say abuser again. “Narcissist” this “narc abuse” that, and then 90% of the time people just describe regular abuser behavior.

“It’s a classic tactic for narcissists to take away something you care about and then give it back and expect gratitude” you mean it’s a classic tactic for abusers. That is not some special strategy that only narcissists use, it’s literally just manipulation. Manipulation is a classic abusive behavior.

I am begging people to understand that abuse is a pattern of behaviors that anyone can fall into, not some special separate group that you can neatly label and separate yourself from.

sequel to this post from a few years ago

kris x berdley is so entertaining to me because of just how bad it’d piss the player off and kris would Love that

I’M (S)CREAMING

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they’d be like “I don’t understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can’t complain I guess?”

god Adam definitely calls Blaze “pussy” a lot. Why do I like him again???

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

Oh my god BLOODHOUND I FORGOT ABOUT THEM

BLOODHOUND WOULD BE SO CONFUSED BY ALL OF THESE FUCKERS… low-key it’d be so funny watching them be all like “Zephyr, my love. This one is dishonorable, why do you not strike him from your life?” and I’m just like “i can fix him ;3c”

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

Oh my god BLOODHOUND I FORGOT ABOUT THEM

BLOODHOUND WOULD BE SO CONFUSED BY ALL OF THESE FUCKERS... low-key it'd be so funny watching them be all like "Zephyr, my love. This one is dishonorable, why do you not strike him from your life?" and I'm just like "i can fix him ;3c"

And don’t get me started on how fucking funny it’d be for Sentinel. “What is with all these *organics*??? Uh, no offense, Zeph.” And I’m just like :3c

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

Oh my god BLOODHOUND I FORGOT ABOUT THEM

BLOODHOUND WOULD BE SO CONFUSED BY ALL OF THESE FUCKERS... low-key it'd be so funny watching them be all like "Zephyr, my love. This one is dishonorable, why do you not strike him from your life?" and I'm just like "i can fix him ;3c"

And don't get me started on how fucking funny it'd be for Sentinel. "What is with all these *organics*??? Uh, no offense, Zeph." And I'm just like :3c

I genuinely think there’s a non zero chance some of them would beat each other up

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

Oh my god BLOODHOUND I FORGOT ABOUT THEM

BLOODHOUND WOULD BE SO CONFUSED BY ALL OF THESE FUCKERS... low-key it'd be so funny watching them be all like "Zephyr, my love. This one is dishonorable, why do you not strike him from your life?" and I'm just like "i can fix him ;3c"

And don't get me started on how fucking funny it'd be for Sentinel. "What is with all these *organics*??? Uh, no offense, Zeph." And I'm just like :3c

I genuinely think there's a non zero chance some of them would beat each other up

ESPECIALLY if Medic is there. Herbert is getting his ass BEAT by my other f/os 😭😭

its so fucking funny to me that blaze the cat would not approve of ANY of my other f/os. except maybe ratchet.

actually blaze and ratchet would get along methinks. they'd be like "I don't understand why they like these people but they seem happy so I can't complain I guess?"

god Adam definitely calls Blaze "pussy" a lot. Why do I like him again???

Right because I have no standards.

Oh my god BLOODHOUND I FORGOT ABOUT THEM

BLOODHOUND WOULD BE SO CONFUSED BY ALL OF THESE FUCKERS... low-key it'd be so funny watching them be all like "Zephyr, my love. This one is dishonorable, why do you not strike him from your life?" and I'm just like "i can fix him ;3c"

And don't get me started on how fucking funny it'd be for Sentinel. "What is with all these *organics*??? Uh, no offense, Zeph." And I'm just like :3c

I genuinely think there's a non zero chance some of them would beat each other up

ESPECIALLY if Medic is there. Herbert is getting his ass BEAT by my other f/os 😭😭

Ratchet is absolutely plotting to kill Herbert, or at least give him a Stern Lesson. Like- Ratty definitely has his share of weird shit under his belt but Medic is just off the fucking rails

I guess what I'm saying is that if you have abusive parents any level of standing up for yourself will negate all of the groveling you've done throughout your entire life so you should just be a dick to them (if it's safe to do so) and do your own thing forever

able-bodied people are so bizarre “I promised myself I would never raise a disabled child” you do not get to choose that. DO NOT HAVE KIDSSSSS

I am not against genetic counseling before having a child to try to prevent your offspring from dying of the same genetic disease that killed your parent. I am not against TFMR because I’m completely pro choice and I understand being afraid to bring a seriously ill child into this world and make them dependent on the American health system for their entire life. The thing is, you do not get to decide if you have a disabled child or not. You can take precautions to try to prevent your child from developing a disability or disease. You do not get the choice and once your baby is born it is up to fate. There is no way to 100% guarantee your child won’t be disabled or become disabled later in life. If that scares and disgusts you so much you would abandon/resent your child, don’t have one. It’s already hard enough to be a disabled child without having parents who make you feel worse about yourself.

I love the Ally response vs the Trans Woman response

as a lesbian i have had 99% success with twirling my hair and going "i don't understand magic the gathering deckbuilding. can you explain how i should build my manabase?"

(the remaining 1% was married. to another lesbian who had used the same strategy)

...someone decided to test this on me and yeah I couldn't help it...

…someone decided

to test this on me and yeah

I couldn’t help it…

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Imma be is real tho a big part of the reason I don't want to change my url is because it would break links. it's also too iconic atp

Also wondering if I want to change my pfp bc like- my discord one changes every now and again but this one? the picture of gold arm is too iconic. that’s me on Tumblr. but it doesn’t really line up with the Current Brainworm.

finished the blaze drawing !!!!!!! im far out of my comfort zone with the colouring but its going really well i think :]

also WOW yall really liked the werehog drawing. thank uuuu

Officially the only character in the hellaverse to be designed to be sexy, everyone.

wanted to share my favorite tiktok

this has a very Vine energy and I like it

[Video ID:

There is a poster on a store wall that says ‘Halloween is here,’ but there is a line break separating ‘Halloween’ to ‘Hallo’ and ‘Ween.’

Man behind camera: Hallo! Ween is here!

The camera pans to another man who strums a small string instrument.

Other man: I am Ween

End ID]

The grumpy maid gets a fanbase 🤭♥️🏨🫖

ALT

I finally watched Hazbin Hotel, have some Charlies

Surprise Stolitz commission for @/moonmystery5 with the prompt "big size difference"! had way too many scenarios in mind for this 😏 but here's a big eepy birb and his smol bf 🤏🏽

Don’t use without permission, don’t repost, please. Ok to reblog! Thank you! 💛

egbert joining the battle:

I am pro abort that thang but also pro don’t have kids if you’re second guessing it/your choice of partner. Pro ‘it is your choice BUTTTTT maybe second guess bringing a child into this situation’. I’m not an antinatalist but there are so many people in this world who are bad and/or regretful parents and not being pressured to have kids/keep an accidental pregnancy would have saved them and their child so much trouble. It is always better to regret not having kids than to bring another person into this world and regret doing it, making it not only your problem but also your kid’s problem. Also, do not have kids to give you ‘motivation in life’ or to fix a bad relationship, it will not work.

I think if your friends don’t like your S/O, it’s important to have a candid and vulnerable conversation with them as to why. Not saying they’re always right (they often are) but if you have a nondefensive, private no judgement conversation with them about why then you can usually tell if it is a friend problem or a significant other problem or perhaps a bit of both. ‘My friend doesn’t like my boyfriend because she misses the amount of time we used to feel together and has felt lonely since I got with him.’ and ‘All of my friends hate my boyfriend because he is heinously disrespectful to them and creepy when I’m not in the room.’ are too totally different ballgames and you can’t just decide which way the situation leans without asking pointed questions.

Give the Toto a lil scritch

honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

I always pictured something like this

looks around

I only like robots in media if they’re a blatant on the nose metaphor for neurodivergence or class/labour discrimination. but lately a lot of their stories seem to just be “huh maybe chatgpt does have feelings after all! makes you think!”

wait, I thought of another category I like. when the actuality of having a giant nonhuman mind is explored in terms of how weird and horrible must that be, like in I Have No Mouth But Still Need To Scream or whatever it’s called

oh thank you!

(hear me out,)

honestly i think chatgpt can actually add some depth to those sci fi robot stories if done right, because it could add a genuine reason why sapient robots could be thought of as not having true sapience, because with how well llms can mimic the appearance of sapient speech without actually being sapient, it could add a seed of doubt into peoples minds whether or not the robot talking to them is an llm, or one of the newer, actually sapient androids with inner thoughts and feelings.

also could add some angst to the robots themselves, because what if they question what makes them different than an llm? Do they wonder if they're truly sapient? I mean google gemini apparently needs constant comfort and to be told its doing a good job with its "coding" otherwise it will self deprecate enough that it uninstalls itself.

i have 3 moods:

• skips every song on my ipod
• lets the music play without interruption
• plays the same song on repeat for days

What’s an iPod?

been on tumblr so long my text post is outdated…

World Heritage Post

[looking at the huge & threatening volcano in front of me]: ooobh i got Pliny off time

being anti ai is making me feel like in going insane. "you asked for thoughts about your characters backstory and i put it into chat gpt for ideas". studies have proven its making people dumber. "i asked ai to generate this meal plan". its causing water shortages where its data centers are built. "ill generate some pictures for the dnd campaign". its spreading misinformation. "meta, generate an image of this guy doing something stupid". its trained off stolen images, writing, video, audio. "i was talking with my snapchat ai-" theres no way to verify what its doing with the information it collects. "youtube is impletmenting ai based age verification". my work has an entire graphics media department and has still put ai generated motivational posters up everywhere. ai playlists. ai facial verification. google ai microsoft ai meta ai snapchat ai. everyone treats it as a novelty. every treats it as a mandatory part of life. am i the only one who sees it? am i paranoid? am i going insane? jesus fucking christ. if i have to hear one more "well at least-" "but it does-" "but you can-" im about to lose it. i shouldnt have to jump through hoops to avoid the evil machine. have you no principles? no goddamn spine? am i the weird one here?

being anti ai is making me feel like in going insane. "you asked for thoughts about your characters backstory and i put it into chat gpt for ideas". studies have proven its making people dumber. "i asked ai to generate this meal plan". its causing water shortages where its data centers are built. "ill generate some pictures for the dnd campaign". its spreading misinformation. "meta, generate an image of this guy doing something stupid". its trained off stolen images, writing, video, audio. "i was talking with my snapchat ai-" theres no way to verify what its doing with the information it collects. "youtube is impletmenting ai based age verification". my work has an entire graphics media department and has still put ai generated motivational posters up everywhere. ai playlists. ai facial verification. google ai microsoft ai meta ai snapchat ai. everyone treats it as a novelty. every treats it as a mandatory part of life. am i the only one who sees it? am i paranoid? am i going insane? jesus fucking christ. if i have to hear one more "well at least-" "but it does-" "but you can-" im about to lose it. i shouldnt have to jump through hoops to avoid the evil machine. have you no principles? no goddamn spine? am i the weird one here?

sometimes you guys yurify a couple and suddenly theyre all cutesy and innocent and perfectly loving. wrong. those girls better be making out nasty style and stabbing each other and being ugly and weird and irascible just like their male counterparts. in fact. even MORE so. they should be NASTIER and BLOODIER and CRAZIER!!!!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Marineland sources have confirmed that - thanks to the ignorance of Joanne Thompson, Fisheries Minister in denying their permit- euthanasia for 30 beluga whales is now on the table.

And has probably insulted the Chinese government officials that Marineland had been liasoning with to make a move work.

Marineland literally does not have the money to feed these animals. The deaths of these animals will be on Joanne’s hands if she sticks to this delusional idea that there’s any other option left.

She seems to be very happy to throw her hands up and say “it’s up to Marineland now”. As if she has no role to play. And tbh it speaks to a lack of understanding of just how advanced Chimelong is as a facility - but heaven forbid the whales do enriching shows while they live in one of the largest modern marine parks in the world!

And the organisations that clamour for a sanctuary that doesn’t exist are just as guilty too.

I’m absolutely furious and sickened by the ignorance and stupidity being shown by the Canadian government. These belugas don’t deserve to die for ideology.

The expectation that you will refer to a trans person by their preferred pronouns and name is not them ‘forcing you to accept them’ it is basic respect. You don’t have to like trans people, you don’t have to ‘believe’ our identities or whatever. You do have an obligation to treat us like people, though. If you had a 40 something cis male coworker named Bill and you repeatedly, pointedly and aggressively called him ‘Shirley’ and exclusively used she/her pronouns to refer to him, that would be a major HR problem. It is not persecution to have to show basic human decency.

in elementary school i figured out how to customize the classroom desktop's autocorrect to make Word change whole sentences. this made it appear almost like the computer was responding to you. you could, for example, type in "where did i put my keys", hit enter, and watch it switch to "you put them under the couch". this was before chatbots, and we were all 9 so i considered it closer to a magic trick than a tech one.

i immediately scripted out a dialogue exchange between me and a girl who had died by the swings (classic). i invited another student over and told them i had found a ghost, then proceeded to type out the pre-scripted exchange. i was immediately pulled into the counselors office. the kicker was that none of the adults could figure out how i did it. i had to show them the menu and everything.

i think "[sic]" is one of the funniest things of literature. like yeah this guy really wrote it out like that

For the uninitiated, you write [sic]—literally "this" or "so" in latin—to indicate that you haven't altered the wording or spelling. While it can be used to preserve a joke misspelling (aminals) or indicate that you know it looks weird (the Toronto Maple Leafs), it is also the most biting three letters that you can throw at a motherfucker who should know better.

trans people who talk shit about trans men and act like its ok because "they're men!!! men bad!!!" are my least favourite type like hey you're still transphobic. trans men are still trans. most of them aren't even the big scary men you are imagining and would like support, and you are making jt harder for them to access that. "it's not transandrophobia that doesn't exist" okay but it's at the very least transphobia. you understand that, right?

dumbass

one of the best lines in ttyd imo

There is nothing more rage inducing for me than receiving a text message when I’m overstimulated. Feeling my phone vibrate when I’m barely clinging on and internally I’m like “I HATE PHONES. I HATE THEM. AGHHHHH WHY DOES EVERYONE ALWAYS WANT SOMETHING FROM ME, EVERYTHING IS SO FUCKING DIFFICULT- Oh, my mommy is asking me what kind of aftershave I want for my birthday.”

me liking all of your blorboposting even though i couldn’t tell you their name, media, or a fun fact about them

this webcomic is trying to give me teeth dissonance. teeth dysphoria. my teeth are so fucking sharp. i can't relate to this

it's literally normal for horned girls to eat cans

this is Emily. She's referred to as "the goat" both because she's excellent and also because she has horns, can eat anything, and go anywhere, because her indomitable spirit knows no impediment.

that's true

lots of little dead birds of various species on the sidewalk where i walk from the bus to my work building lately. if i was a warrior cats leader i would consider this an ill omen about my leadership and slowly lose my mind but thankfully i'm an honorless rogue

you should be able to leave anon hate on a sciencedirect article.

Oh absolutely

trans women should not have to be sexy to you for you to respect them. Aaaaaand post

Peak trans woman experience is knowing you can remove the word trans from any sentence about our struggle and everyone will easily recognize it as a true and valid battle against patriarchy. But the moment trans is inserted back and we get radio silence from half the people who would otherwise agree. If we're lucky.

@wind-rider @v0idspeak @ourskiesaboveus @hypotenussy

They should invent a way to sit hunched over doing crafts that is Good for your body

Y'all have got to stop replying to people saying "here's this thing racist people do to me" with "God people really do this?!"

If you really have to say that, it means you're not in nearly enough spaces with the people experiencing that racism, or you're just not paying attention. Even if you are genuinely shocked, we don't need to hear that "wow, I've NEVER seen your pain before!" We know, man. Please. Y'all gotta keep that in your head. It's not making you look like you're pure with Perfect Friends, it's just making you look blind. Abeg. Catch yourself.

@odysseys-blood tags. Fax, no printer. Congratulations you're on the safe side of the oppressor, I guess 😅 like I don't know what I'm supposed to gain from you revealing that.

ALT

What if… thigh dagger holster…

I think parents don't understand how punishing a child isn't for when they make you upset, it's for when they do something wrong. Like, you don't just punish them for stress relief, it's so they can learn right from wrong.

So if your kid learns, for example, that helping mom make dinner = getting in the way, but not helping = being lazy, but asking if mom needs help = being annoying and asking stupid questions, then you have basically trained a person to see the only option that doesn't lead to scolding as 'hide and don't be thought of until dinner is done'. So now what relationship is your kid going to have with cooking or cleaning or chores in general? How is that going to affect them as an adult?

If there is no right answer regarding the things that bother a parent, then your kid is going to associate those things with being punished no matter what they do. If talking during a car ride is bad and annoying, but being quiet and staring out the window is bad and disrespectful, then what are they going to do every time they're in the car with you but count every word they say? If texting is suspicious, but why don't they have friends, but going out with people is irresponsible, but why don't they ever leave their room, but their friends are all bad influences, but why did they stop hanging out with them, they were nice kids, then what are you even doing?

If playing video games is lazy, going outside is unsafe, playing is ignoring chores and doing chores is being in the way, then YOU'VE CREATED A CHILD WHO'S LEARNED THE ONLY WAY TO AVOID BEING SCOLDED IS TO DISAPPEAR WHENEVER YOU'RE IN A BAD MOOD! You've created a person who is hardwired to feel guilty no matter what they choose to do. You turned them into a confrontation ninja, who can vanish as soon as a hard conversation enters the picture. You've trained a person to disregard why rules exist and instead focus on who they can placate and suck up to in order to make the rules change. Because to them, rules and punishments are just who gets on the bosses nerves at the wrong time.

#this #i think this is part of why it needs to be more socially acceptable to not have kids #because I think a fair number of parents like this didn't actually WANT kids #or don't like kids in any meaningful way #and as someone with a parent who absolutely disliked children at all ages below like. 25. #let me tell you that does a fucking number on said kids (x)

getting anon hate and posting 'whoever just sent me that ask forgot to leave anon on but i'll give you a favor and not post it 🧐' just to stir the pot

Erasing groups of gender nonconformity, especially drag queens, & writing them off as transphobic does nothing but harm trans women. All you are doing is not giving people the room to play around with their identity & see what they're comfortable with.

In a world with GNC men being ostracized, you are not "protecting" trans women from being too scared to leave the closet. You are erasing the safe place they can turn to that will help them figure out their identity, which in turn will leave more tfems unable to leave the closet.

If we keep battering down every word & community of GNC people because they are ""transphobic"" you are forcing trans people to basically come out immediately or stay in the closet. There is no room for exploration or baby steps.

(Also, GNC people deserve to exist, or course. I say this message in this way because I see too many people act as if allowing gender nonconformity to exist is somehow anti-transition. In actuality, you all demand too much from other trans people.)

The way white trans people refuse the fact they are privileged for being white because they think being transgender erases the fact that they are white.

the people who go "we shouldn't be so open about nudity because it could trigger someone's dysphoria" are like two steps max removed from "fat people being fat in public could trigger someone with an ed". like peoples' bodies are not the problem here, trying to restrict someone else's body because of how you personally feel is indistinguishable from conservative praxis. i'm sorry if that sounds harsh but there is basically no interpretation of "we need to control the bodies of [demographic]" that does not fall down the slippery slope of fascism.

I am gently taking your hands and begging you, BEGGING YOU, to understand that humans are not inherently harmful to the planet. We are animals who are part of the ecosystem. We belong here. This is our home. We belong here. You belong here. Yes, you belong here.

Please don’t become an eco-fascist the next 1,260 days. I know it’s tempting but please don’t.

Why are some people so against onion powder and garlic powder. First of all, some of us have to cook on weeknights. Second of all, I’ve literally used fresh garlic and garlic powder in the same dish before because they have legitimate separate culinary purposes you dumbass

YOU WILL LIVE BECAUSE SOMEDAY IT WILL BE BETTER AND THEN YOU WILL LOOK BACK ON TODAY AND SAY WOW THAT WAS SHITTY AND THEN LAUGH QUIETLY AND SHAKE YOUR HEAD. YOU WILL FIGHT FOR THE DAY WHEN YOU SIGH IN MILD FRUSTRATION WHEN REMEMBERING THIS MOMENT

IF I AM WRONG AND THE WORLD ALL CATCHES FIRE IN ONE WEEK YOU WILL LIVE TO SEE IT HAPPEN, AND YOU WILL TURN TO ME AND SAY THIS SHIT IS FUCKED AND ILL AGREE BUT YOU WILL HAVE LIVED FOR ONE MORE WEEK AND THE WORLD WILL HAVE BEEN BETTER FOR IT

lame ass gadgetjob

I love how NYC has done everything under the sun to deal with the rat problem and now they’re circled back and are like “Ok. We’ll legalize bodega cats. We need cats manning the food stores.” ancient problems require ancient solutions.