isn't it nice?
isn't it nice?
This bitsy game is based on a situation that I experienced at my hairdresser, a few weeks prior to the release of this game. Players get to relive the situation from my point of view. The narratives depicted within this game are common encounters in my everyday life. Possible trigger themes are transitioning, gender identity, trans-/queerphobia and misogyny. The game also takes on gender stereotypes.
Controls
A / D or arrow keys to advance text. The game also supports controller/gamepad inputs.
On mobile devices, swipe left / right to advance text. It is recommended to play this game on a desktop device.
About
There are a total of three possible ways for the game to end. One of them resembles the actual conversation that inspired me to make this game. The other two endings relate to some of my personal inner conflicts, with one of them being linked directly to one of my partners and their experiences. There is a lot to say about the issues addressed within this game, and I hope that this game will inspire people to question things more - and possibly even find the strength to speak up, whenever it is safe and productive to do so.
'isn't it nice' was made using bitsy, the "gamepad input", "long dialog", and the "dialog choices" hack by Sean S. LeBlanc.
The game was featured in the 2023 Queer Games Festival Showcase.
Comments
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If you can't kill it with yer stick, then you can't do anything about it?? wtf??
this game really got me thinking about things, especially since I got my first Very Short haircut today, and I'm not cis as well
it will always feel strange to me when something like this happens. if a cis woman wanted to get a buzz cut, or if the hairdresser didn't know the customer was trans, I feel like not as many questions would be asked.
it infuriates me that just because a woman is trans, she MUST present herself in a feminine manner, she MUST grow her hair out and feel good about it, she MUST do her best to pass as a woman and make a big deal out it of when she does. the same goes for trans men: he MUST keep his hair short, he MUST wear manly clothes and avoid anything remotely feminine, etc etc.
I also hate that to pass as a woman, one is expected to look like what is basically a trad wife. even though this kind of conversation would go differently with a cis woman, I still think that, had she also asked for a buzz cut, people like this hairdresser would also go "are you sure? are you sure? won't you look like a man?". women, in general, are expected to present themselves in a feminine manner, and this is especially exacerbated with trans women and passing.
sorry for the rant, i just have Many Thoughts, and they sometimes go in circles. rock whatever hairstyle you want, Alicia, and have a super time! :)
there was no need to create this game about people who tried their best to be nice
if you didn't like it then deal with it, not all people have experienced being transgender, which means they don't know how to treat one
their intentions were good, they weren't purposefully trying to make you mad.
people will 100% tend to notice your differences, that's a normal part of human nature
And there was no need for you to pop in here and shame someone for making art about their lived experiences, and yet here we are.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions by cis and straight people. Trans people "deal with it" a thousand times a day with tiny ways that cis people make them feel small or want to silence them (like you did here), or call attention to the exact things they didn't want attention called. And that's from the well-meaning folks who aren't actively trying to harm trans people-- they also "deal with it" from the folks who are actively trying to harm them.
Did this game make you feel uncomfortable? It did for me! It should make you uncomfortable-- it's capturing an uncomfortable interaction, and exploring how that can go. It's opening a door into the experience as a trans woman so that those of us who won't have that experience can empathize with it and understand where she's coming from, and those who do have it (read the comments-- there are many!) will feel seen and heard, and know they aren't so alone in this awful, awful world.
Did she name the hairdresser? No. No harm was caused to any hairdresser in the making of this game. The hairdresser was anonymized and the interaction was made fictional for the purpose of art. And yet, you decided to come here and defend the fictional hairdresser, instead of taking the gift that this creator has given us-- the gift of seeing the world through her eyes so we can better empathize and understand her experience-- instead of that, you decided to come in here and tell her that she should not have made this game. Should not have shared this experience. Should have kept quiet. Been small. "Dealt with it."
You should sit with your discomfort and think about why you needed to tell someone they shouldn't have made their art. And then you should either shut up about the answer, or go make your own art. But what you should not do is go tell a creator that they shouldn't have made something that comes from their own deep, personal experiences.
To Alicia: I am sorry for ranting in your comments at this pillowcase. If this defense of your game is unwelcome, I will happily delete it. You made a great game which made me feel uncomfortable, and which made me think, and I thank you for it.
this is a great game! Pretty on point
yeah we have people do this to us too :P
it's annoying, this game captures the feeling well i think
Played it, then played it again, and again. I may not be a trans woman, but I could just feel the awkwardness of witnessing a cis person trying (and failing) to be nice, because they just don't understand. Very well made.
holy shit how fragile do you have to be when someone is trying to be nice to you you have a fucking breakdown, and make a bitsy game about it
The irony of you calling anyone fragile lmoa
which one of you replied lol
Short and straightforward tale of a cis hairdresser trying to be supportive of a trans customer and getting it badly wrong. CW: gender stereotypes, ignorance. 3/5 stars - enjoyable.
nightmare. loved it. simple story-telling from our perspective <3
Ugh, how exhausting to be treated this way. At the end of the day, well-meaning ignorance is still ignorance. Thank you for making this; it’s a really well-made bitsy and it inspires thought and consideration.
i need this hairdresser bc all the ones i find are just something dgahgshjfwjs
Jesus Christ this is horrifying. I hope that you're okay. It's awful that we have to constantly use our pain to transform it into art, but that is our reality. I hope it gets better for us, I hope you are surrounded by love and support, and what an amazing piece you submitted.
Are you not excited not being called slurs?
I'm just so fucking tired. I'm a badass woman and I want to be badass, but every time I don combat boots and cargo pants instead of a pink dress everybody is like "oooh have you changed your mind?"
Thank you for this one. It was amazing.
It is nice, the game that is. Dealing with people, sometimes less so.
Thank you a lot for sharing your experience!
I wanted to have words with the hairdresser by the end of the haircut.
Buzz cut ending too, I just...something smelled right when that choice came up. You did an amazing job at capturing that seething feeling of being trapped under a spotlight and being expected to explain yourself. To fit their ideas, to be one of the 'good ones'.
It just hits hard and hits close, I still claw at the rarified feminine idea but sometimes I rage and hit and spit at it, at the daft pile of performative rubble I'm supposed to climb. When my resolve breaks and I'm shaving my legs at midnight because it's going to be hot the next day and as much as I think that entire exercise is pure fucking bullshit, I can't stand the thought of carrying that masculine signal with me. Trying to negotiate my existence between the 'bite me' feminist who could burn it down and the 'headpats please' trans girl who just wants to be.
This is, this is way, way too real. This is amazing. Thank you.
As usual, I really loved your game. That hairdresser was sooo obnoxious omg. I really like how this game confronts the player with a daily cringe situation you had to face (and that trans women often have to face), and how you give us your thoughts about it in the end. And Bitsy works perfectly for that.
I picked the radical ending and completely cut my hair off. It felt liberating, even if it was just a game. I might do just that some day. I’ve been thinking about a buzz cut for some weeks now. And doing a few piercing. I don’t know if I’ll have the guts to do that but… Your game really made me wanna do it for good.
Thank you for this game. It made me realize how things that are perhaps meant to be supportive can come off as the opposite of that.
As a cis-person you don't always recognize the struggles of non-cis people and how you can actually be a cause of that without intending to be.
We actually prefer “cisn’t” /j
I’m sorry I couldn’t help myself -w-’
Ok, i played this game on my phone so controlls were funny. Again, you made a wonderful bitsy that encapsulated another moment of your life. I feel sorry to hear that this happened to you. One of my biggest concerns is that i wont find a place in the world if i show who i truly am. I only show myself on the internet or when i go somewhere with friends (wich hasn't happened in a while). I hope that we will be able to outlive this problem, one way or another.
I relate to your concerns. Finding a space that is both safe and comfortable is an incredibly difficult task, especially as a person with queer gender expression / gender identity.
Hiding ourselves is not the answer that we should give to the world - but I can not blame anyone who chooses to hide and stay away from confrontation. After all, it is incredibly scary and often draining to face these kinds of situations.
I made this game because I believe that things can get better - if people dare to speak up and address these issues. What I depicted in this game relates to the everyday reality of so many people. There is a lot of progress to be made.