- kiseungsu rearing facility@sctir
- 1655138489 01:41pm • Jun 13 2022
Hi, essay anon here.
So I might actually write that essay, I was thinking about essay topics, or meta to talk about and got hit in the face by some parallels and mirroring.
SHJ and HYJ’s relationship is a journey into personhood. Both of them dehumanize each other at the beginning, not recognizing the other as an actual human being. Merely something to use. They also think the same of themselves. HYJ even accepts the “item” label, and thinks he would be much more useful as an item, a tool without an ego, simply something to use. (mild spoilers for SHJ's backstory here) We don’t get much insight into SHJ’s mindset and opinion of himself, but I think even without his memories, he’s aware that his existence is merely the means to an end for someone else. That he isn’t a “person” in the same sense as everyone else. SHJ most likely experiences the disconnect that all the other S-ranks do, but on a much higher level due to his sheer experience.
His emotions have become flat and stunted. He’s functional, and great at what he does, but he no longer is able to experience great bouts of emotions in the way that regular people do. This leads him to dehumanize himself, as humans and animals can be cute, they can be hurt and die. Yet he won’t, and no one cares for him, as he is not someone worthy of being cared for in his own opinion.
Anyway, I might take this idea, find some supporting quotes, and write an actual essay lol. Already have over 500 words written. (I might be more successful at this essay than *checks notes* the 8 unwritten sctir fanfic ideas in my brain)
anon can we skip the small talk i want your hand in marriage
YESSS sctir explores personhood a lot i think. especially self worth and how charas perceive both themselves and others in relation to the people they love— yoohyun only caring about people when they’ve to do with yoojin, for example, and even himself to some extent especially in regards to his emotions (422). like yoojin’s whole thing is that he values all his kid’s lives over his own even though he seems to have convinced himself that he doesn’t?????? yoojin. man. being unable to let go of the past is a huge thing for him and considering everything he’s lost— not only all the people under his care from the keyword pre-reg, but also yh seemingly tossing him aside and severing their relationship when it was something that yj dedicated his own life to, and then fucking dying— it becomes a fuckin vital part of his character.
as for shj— i haven’t reached that far into his backstory yet, but @dbgdbw ’s translation notes (especially at the end of ch 209— super informative read for both hyj and shj’s speech patterns) are iiincredibly thorough and really helped me grasp what sort of relationship hj and yj have, and how it evolves, just from speech patterns alone. i only have a vagueish knowledge of what happened over there (meaning his backstory) so at risk of becoming the very thing i despise and mischaracterizing my favourite annoying bastard (loving), i won’t speak on him any more. but i do think you’re right about their journey into personhood— their compromise, agreement, concession, whatever you want to call it in 187 (end of shj’s birthday party arc) was both of them starting to recognise the other as a person. “…It felt like the first time I saw Sung Hyunjae as a person… right now, he felt just a tiny bit different.” (187).
anyways, i await that essay eagerly, and if you haven’t already, check out dbgdbw’s translations!! they’re very informative!
best,
professor wei
