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High Roller

by Sima Cunningham

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1.
Nothing 05:52
A simple touch A rested hand A fallen face if he can Remember her, light his eye When she comes to his side Boy was what you were called Were you a poet inside of your body? Held in place by skin and bones A fallen face never home to spoken word Or his own name Or wishes to be saved again I often sit and imagine you as a reincarnated bird Ready for a second flight Body follows hungry eyes Comforted by John and Paul You had their picture up on your wall God cut out your tongue Left you unable to tell anyone I… Inside of my head I am free It would mean nothing Boy was born Boy was left Boy was sick and that was it Boy was loved Boy was lost Boy was never known Birthday sung too many times Full of dreams and quick goodbyes The first in line, the first to go The only one so unknown Boy was what you were called You were a picture up on our wall God cut our your tongue Left you unable to tell anyone I am here It would mean nothing
2.
High Roller 03:34
Heavy like a ball and chain Heavy like a pad of butter Never one to take your pain Never one to seek the other Let me get a word in son Tell me all about that kiss I could be the golden one If someone had the common sense to hear me out Have you got another one? Pity you to go alone I could be a smoking gun Help you put the cool inside That loosey mouth I tune you out High roller Lose it again I dare you Heady like the written word Heady like the sting of sulfur Hustling the early bird Calling out the morning after Let me get a word in son Someone’s gotta catch that kiss Used to be a different world No one had the common sense To hear me out Have you got a dollar on you? Someone’s gotta catch that kiss I could be a shepherd for you Show you how to make good of that Goofy pout I tune you out High roller I tune you out With that loosey mouth High roller Lose it again I dare you
3.
Your Bones 03:04
There’s something in your eyes today you’re simply not the same I wanna be the catalyst that makes it all okay You’re trying to write a letter in the rhythms of your breath We start to say but now we’ve talked this elephant to death Cause your bones are your own your bones are your own your bones are your own You went out on the ocean on a solitary raft I wanna bring a lifeboat but it only holds you back You’re blind with salty water, desperate but free And soon you’ll find an island a place I’ll never see I don’t want to be your hero just to be your friend Just to speak your language Just to be a respite I tried to read your needs like you’re a novel in turmoil Like you are the main character and I am just the foil
4.
Give Up 04:22
Give up the homies give up the slack I think you’ll be better in your second act Tell all the people holding you back You gotta move right now its painted black Cause I don’t think you know what you are made of Cause you’ve never looked there before And I don’t think you know that you’re afraid So when you need more, don’t be sore Give up the reasons give up the slag Butter a biscuit for the tail that wags Tip off the driver who goes fast And gets you away from your molasses past Shake off your leeches Rip up your magazines I don’t wanna see you back here You’re onto bigger things This town will stay the same And they’ll still know your name Cause I don’t think you know what you are made of Cause you’ve never looked there before And I don’t think you know that you’re afraid So when you need more, don’t be sore
5.
For Liam 04:50
All the friends I’ve lost, acquaintances so meaningless Honestly I’ve nearly forgot all but a few As the years go by and I see you from time to time Silently we draw the lines from me to you And I would die for you I’d take a bullet and I’d give one too I’ve thought about it since the day when you came into my life As we’re growing up and moving on to different stuff We’ve always known that life is tough and never fair But through these veins of my mine runs your blood and you will find That as the world crumbles with time that will stay true And I would die for you I’d take a bullet and I’d give one too I’ve thought about it since the day when you came into my life And I could spread myself thin or I could really dig in But at the end of my life I hope I do it right And I would die for you I’d take a bullet and I’d give one too I’ve thought about it since the day when you came into my life And I would die for you But I hope that I won’t have to I hope we’re happy, old, and crazy when we both close our eyes
6.
In some ways you’re wrong, some ways you’re right Look out for shallows stranding you at night When you have, you have, you have, you have it all In some ways you’re old, some ways you’re young Some realizations will do you no good When you have, you have, you have, you have it all I some ways you’re near, some ways you’re far Somehow I’ll find you wherever you are Cause you have it all, you have it all You have, you have, you have, you have it all
7.
Hyenas 03:39
There was jelly on the floor, something in the air And the girls were laughing like hyenas, hyenas White chalk on the ground They called their corners For something they had found To free them, the hyenas Now they’re walking out the door Nylons in their hair They go to Blockbuster to see who they can scare And they saves a pretty penny for their first date With busts of cotton And heels, high heels
8.
Both Ways 03:33
We can’t have it both ways And the pain of that is amazing I’ve been so sick At the thought of calling it What it is We can’t have it both ways We can’t look it in the face I have half a mind to erase you And just quit town Let my crazy drown Where it may I can’t look you in the face See you see me Try to get my demons to die quietly See me, seeing you Try to let this all go lightly We can’t have it both ways I wanna be a wolf every other day And leave the pack Coming running back Go off and howl at the moon I can’t have my way with you
9.
Abilene 03:12
Abilene you don’t even know what I mean When I tell you the world has done you wrong Abilene maybe if you’d seen what I seen You would see that someone is keeping you down Cause everything you knew just flew out the window Everything you had just walked out the door Everything you stand for, everything once were Doesn’t matter anymore Abilene filter out your noisy scene Pulling you far far far away from yourself Abilene somewhere there’s a bigger sea Waiting for your voice to stir it’s calm Everything you knew just flew out the window Everything you had just walked out the door Everything you stand for, everything once were Doesn’t matter anymore Oh how are you doing everything? I’m truly blown away Everything you knew just flew out the window Everything you had just walked out the door Everything you stand for, everything once were Doesn’t matter anymore
10.
Adonai 04:39
I just want to put it out into the universe That you are missed so much The feel of your sweaty palms and your funny take on psalms I really miss your touch But love is in the nuances we know And it’s easy to imagine we’re alone I’ll forgive your ma– the missing headstone How she could’ve known she had a good son But you made that call without us all I can still remember your eyes coming out of your cashmere sweater Oh it got better, it did Your tutu running down the school hall, the boy of the ball With vegan cheese on your bagel But love is in the nuances we know And it’s easy to imagine we’re alone Reaching for your ever hallelujah Thinking that you’d never find a true love But you made that call without us all Adonai ro’i, adonai ro'i lo-echsar It got better, it got better, it got better Yes it did

credits

released August 30, 2024

All songs written by Sima Cunningham
Produced by Sima Cunningham and Dorian Gehring
Recorded and mixed by Dorian Gehring at Fox Hall Studio, Chicago
Mastered by Nick Broste at Kind Wizard, Chicago
Drums by Charles Rumback on tracks 1, 7
Drums by Spencer Tweedy on tracks 2, 5, 6, 8, 10
Drums by Jack Henry on track 9
Drums by Dorian Gehring on track 4
Bass by Dorian Gehring on tracks 1, 4, 5, 9
Bass by Liam Kazar on tracks 2, 7, 10
Guitars by Dorian Gehring
Piano, synths, guitar by Sima Cunningham
Strings performed and arranged by Macie Stewart
Backing vocals on tracks 9, 10 by Andrew Sa, Elizabeth Moen, Macie Stewart
Featured vocals on track 8 by Clay Frankel

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Sima Cunningham Chicago, Illinois

Sima Cunningham is a Chicago-based musician. She writes a lot of songs and is on tour a lot with her band Finom. Here lies her solo material.

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