Humans are the proverbial “Sleeping Giant,” and thus make remarkably good deterrents. A common tactic of the Galactic Federation is to simply call in a human warship, such as the USS “Fuck Around and, FindOut,” and simply let it sit nearby. Peace Talks happen within the week.

You are kidnapped by time travelers who explain that you were the key person affecting their history, and this is their one chance to fix things. As the doors open to their time, you see them all gasp. “Nothing has changed,” they say. “Yeah,” you say, “You probably wanted my twin brother.”

Universal translators don’t just translate words from one language to another. They match your culture’s linguistics to the closest cultural dialect/accent of the listener’s world. For example: aliens might not BE Irish, but if they’re Irish in SPIRIT, they’ll be translated with an Irish accent

Some time after first contact, humans discover alien video games. The aliens are mortified because many of their games feature humans as villains, but for some bizarre reason the humans are flattered.

During a near-death experience, you came face-to-face with the God of Death, and pleaded to be returned to the world of the living. He granted your request, and sent you away with the chilling parting words: “Why should I regret letting one soul go, when I stand to gain so many more in return?”

You’re the mustache twirling bad guy who must marry the innocent girl for your scheme to succeed. After your wedding she presents you with her plan to expand your schemes. She’s much more devious and evil than you.