Finance Humor Quotes

“The reason that 'guru' is such a popular word is because 'charlatan' is so hard to spell.”
― William J. Bernstein, The Investor's Manifesto: Preparing for Prosperity, Armageddon, and Everything in Between

“After all, what does the stock market sell us if not the unfounded hope of a rosy future?”
― Haruki Murakami, 1Q84

“The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time.”
― Mokokoma Mokhonoana

“A company could use bricks to measure their growth rate. How many bricks have angry investors thrown at you lately? If the answer is none, then your growth rate is probably pretty good… for the moment.”
― Amy Riekhof, A bit of rubbish about a Brick and a Blanket

“Veblen called it the price-system. Mills called it the Power Elite. It's probably no more than ninety-nine people who don't know what they are doing. They're involved in high finance. Fascinating form of gambling.”
― John Cage, M: Writings '67–'72

“There are certain things that cannot be adequately explained to a virgin either by words or pictures.”
― Alice Schroeder, The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life

“bankers steal money for the same reason that heroin addicts do. They've been put in a position where they cannot get the money they need by honest means. In an egalitarian society that happens a lot less.”
― Dan Davies

“If you look at the numbers closely, I think you’ll find that in four years you won’t have a company to be laughed out of.”
― D. A. Bonds