PerDev Reviewer (Quarter 2):

Relationship - a state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection)

Personal relationships- relationships between people especially, those between friends, lovers and
family members.
Love - strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personalities.
- attraction based on sexual desire, affection, common interests and tenderness felt by lovers
Commitments- the act of binding yourself (intellectually or emotionally) to be a
course of action
- a message that makes a pledge.
Attraction- the act, power, or property of attracting
- attractive quality; magnetic charm; fascination; allurement; enticement
- a person or thing that draws, attracts, allures or entices
Responsibility- the social force that binds you to the courses of action demanded by that force.
- a form of trustworthiness; the trait of being answerable to someone for something or being responsible
for one’s conduct.
Three Kinds of Personal Relationships:
*Family *Friends *Partnership

Why Personal Relationships are Important:

Research shows that healthy relationships can help you:
Live longer. A review of 148 studies found that people with strong social relationships
are 50% less likely to die prematurely. Similarly, Dan Buettner’s Blue Zones research calculates that
committing to a life partner can add 3 years to life expectancy (Researchers Nicholas Christakis and
James Fowler have found that men’s life expectancy benefits from marriage
more than women’s do.)
Deal with stress. The support offered by a caring friend can provide a buffer against
the effects of stress. In a study of over 100 people, researchers found that people who completed a
stressful task experienced a faster recovery when they were reminded of people with whom they had
strong relationships. (Those who were reminded of stressful relationships,
on the other hand, experienced even more stress and higher blood pressure.)
Be healthier. According to research by psychologist Sheldon Cohen, college students
who reported having strong relationships were half as likely to catch a common cold when exposed to the
virus. In addition, 2012 international Gallup poll found that people who feel they have friends and family
to count on are generally more satisfied with their personal health than people who feel isolated. And
hanging out with healthy people increases your own likelihood of health—in their book Connected,
Christakis and Fowler show that non-obese people are more
likely to have non-obese friends because healthy habits spread through our social networks.
Feel richer. A survey by the National Bureau of Economic Research of 5,000 people
found that doubling your group of friends has the same effect on your wellbeing as a 50%
increase in income!
*Low social support is linked to a number of health consequences, such as:
 Depression
 Decreased Immune Function
 Higher Blood Pressure

Most Common Relationship Problems:

 Affairs / infidelity / cheating. This includes emotional infidelity, one-night stands, internet
relationships, long- and short-term affairs and financial infidelity.
 Lack of communication about important matters.
 Lack of support during particularly difficult times from people that matter to you.
 Long-term stress, particularly when not taking responsibility for doing something positive to
address the cause, or about learning to handle it if it cannot be changed.

Basic Rights in a Relationship:

● The right to emotional support
● The right to have your own point of view, even if this differs from your partner's
● The right to have your feelings and experiences acknowledged as real
● The right to live free from criticism and judgment
● The right to be respectfully asked, rather than ordered

Ten Rules for Finding Love and Creating Long Lasting Authentic Relationships:
1. YOU MUST LOVE YOURSELF FIRST
Your relationship with yourself is the central template from which all others are formed. Loving yourself
is a prerequisite to creating a successful and authentic union with another.
2. PARTNERING IS A CHOICE
The choice to be in a relationship is up to you. You have the ability to attract your beloved and cause the
relationship you desire to happen.
3. CREATING LOVE IS A PROCESS
Moving from “I” to “we” requires a shift in perspective and energy. Being an authentic couple is an
evolution.
4. RELATIONSHIPS PROVIDE OPPORTUNITIES TO GROW
Your relationship will serve as an unofficial “life shop” in which you will learn about yourself and how
you can grow on your personal path.
5. COMMUNICATION IS ESSENTIAL
The open exchange of thoughts and feelings is the lifeblood of your relationship.
6. NEGOTIATION WILL BE REQUIRED
There will be times when you and your partner must work through impasses. If you do this consciously
and with respect, you will learn to create win-win outcomes.
7. YOUR RELATIONSHIP WILL BE CHALLENGED BY CHANGE
Life will present turns in the road. How you maneuver those twists and turns determines the success of
your relationship.
8. YOU MUST NURTURE THE RELATIONSHIP FOR IT TO THRIVE
Treasure your beloved and your relationship will flourish.
9. RENEWAL IS THE KEY TO LONGEVITY
Happily, ever after means the ability to keep the relationship fresh and vital.
10. YOU WILL FORGET ALL THIS THE MOMENT YOU FALL IN LOVE
You know all these rules inherently. The challenge is to remember them when you fall under the
enchanting spell of love.

Keeping Healthy Relationships:

In a healthy relationship, both partners:
1. are treated with kindness and respect;
2. are honest with each other;
3. like to spend time together;
4. take an interest in things that are important to each other; ·
5. respect one another’s emotional, physical and sexual limits; and
6. can speak honestly about their feelings

How to Communicate:
Talking openly makes relationships more fun and satisfying;
What’s to talk about?
o Possibility of Pregnancy: Females who engage in sex have a high percentage of putting themselves in
this kind of situation. ·
o Right time for sex: You can consider your current status as a student if it is really high time to be
involved in this kind of activity. Will this make or break your future? ·
o Boundaries: Making the decision to set your limits in a relationship shows your maturity to assert your
priorities and respect yourself.

Adolescence is a crucial period in social development, as adolescents can be easily swayed by their close
relationships.

What can you get from being involved in community activities?

Role models- By getting involved with community activities, you can come into contact with like-minded
peers and positive adult role models other than your parents. Interacting and cooperating with other adults
encourages you to see the world in different ways. It puts your own family experiences and values into a
wider context.
Identity and connection- Being involved in community activities can also help create a sense of being
connected to your local community and the wider world.
Skills- Community activities give you the chance to apply the skills you already have. For example, you
could use the cooking skills you have learned at home at a community feeding program or at a school
fund-raising project. Voluntary work and community activities are also great opportunities to show
initiative and develop skills to get a job.
Self-confidence, mental health and wellbeing- Community activities can boost one’s self- confidence.
You can learn to deal with challenges, communicate with different people and build up your life skills
and abilities in a supportive environment. This is also good for your self- esteem. It’s also a great
foundation for general and mental health and wellbeing.

Culture is learned and socially shared, and it affects all aspects of an individual's life.
- It is where some certain characteristics of adolescent development that are more rooted in than in
human biology or cognitive structures.

Community activity is part of ‘civic responsibility’. It’s about doing things in our community because we
want to or feel we should, rather than because we have to by law.
SERVANT LEADERSHIP
While the idea of servant leadership goes back at least two thousand years, the modern servant leadership
movement was launched by Robert K. Greenleaf in 1970 with the publication of his classic essay, The
Servant as Leader. It was in that essay that he coined the words "servant-leader" and "servant leadership."
"The difference manifests itself in the care taken by the servant-first to make sure that other
people's highest priority needs are being served. The best test, and difficult to administer, is: Do those
served grow as persons? Do they, while being served, become healthier, wiser, freer, more autonomous,
more likely themselves to become servants? And, what is the effect on the least privileged in society?
Will they benefit or at least not be further deprived?"
Greenleaf said that "the servant-leader is the servant first." By that he meant that the desire to serve, the
"servant's heart," is a fundamental characteristic of a servant-leader. It is not about being servile, it is
about wanting to help others. It is about identifying and meeting the needs of colleagues, customers, and
communities.

Different kinds of family structures:

1. Nuclear family: A family unit consisting of at most a father, mother and
dependent children. It is considered the “traditional” family.
2. Extended family: A family consisting of parents and children, along with either
grandparents, grandchildren, aunts or uncles, cousins etc. In some circumstances, the extended family
comes to live either with or in place of a member of the nuclear family.
3. Step families: Two families brought together due to divorce, separation, and remarriage.
4. Single parent family: This can be either a father or a mother who is singly responsible for the raising
of a child. The child can be by birth or adoption. They may be a single parent by choice or by life
circumstances. The other parent may have been part of the family at one time or not at all.
5. Adoptive family: A family where one or more of the children has been adopted. Any structure of the
family may also be an adoptive family.
6. Bi-racial or multi-racial family: A family where the parents are members of different racial identity
groups.
7. Trans-racial adoptive family: A family where the adopted child is of a different racial identity group
than the parents.
8. Blended family: A family that consists of members from two (or more) previous families.
9. Conditionally separated families: A family member is separated from the rest of the family. This may
be due to employment far away; military service; incarceration; hospitalization. They remain significant
members of the family.
10. Foster family: A family where one or more of the children is legally a temporary member of the
household. This “temporary” period may be as short as a few days or as long as the child’s entire
childhood.
11. Gay or Lesbian family: A family where one or both of the parents’ sexual orientation is gay or
lesbian. This may be a two-parent family, adoptive family, a single parent family or an extended family.
12. Immigrant family: A family where the parents have immigrated to another country as adults. Their
children may or may not be immigrants. Some family members may continue to live in the country of
origin, but still be significant figures in the life of the child.
13. Migrant family: A family that moves regularly to places where they have employment. The most
common form of migrant family is farm workers who move with the crop seasons. Children may have a
relatively stable community of people who move at the same time - or the family may know no one in
each new setting.
14. Military families: may also lead a migrant life, with frequent relocation, often on short notice.

FAMILY LEGACIES:
The Emotional Legacy
In order to prosper, our children need an enduring sense of security and stability nurtured in an
environment of safety and love.
The Social Legacy
To really succeed in life, they need to learn more than management techniques, accounting, reading,
writing and geometry. They need to learn the fine art of relating to people. If they learn how to relate well
to others, they’ll have an edge in the game of life.
The Spiritual Legacy
The Spiritual Legacy is overlooked by many, but that's a mistake. As spiritual beings, we adopt attitudes
and beliefs about spiritual matters from one source or another. As parents, we need to take the initiative
and present our faith to our children.
The Legacy You Want to Give
We all have good and bad parts to the legacy we have inherited. The key is to move forward from here.
For some, taking a closer look at the legacy they've been given helps them assess the legacy they want to
pass on.