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are you hungry for me, baby?

@24x81

kostas - 30s - she/her for my next trick: how to keep wanting without ever getting

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You know you should go to the back door, announce your arrival in too many texts, slap your open hand on the door, make him come down to meet you, furious at you in the directionless lowlight, pink in the cheeks the way you like to see him. You do not mind being the dirty secret but you have been feeling stupid, daring. The vodka at the back of your throat, thick and urgent, making you move. You are sensible. Your head is floating up over you. Front door made of frosted glass, brass door handles, dark wood. Fancy. You find the call button, you keep your thumb at it until you hear the click on the other end. You murmur something useless and crude in Russian, petty, but he won’t know that. You laugh. You hear him, voice low and stretching to the contours of his anger, What the fuck are you doing here? Are you insane? Yes, that's you. Insane. Out of your fucking mind. Nothing makes sense. This doesn't make sense, why are you even here. Makes sense, though, for an insane man. He lets you in. Must be insane,too.

Ilya may be the second son physically but he is actually the eldest daughter spiritually

1 4 12 baybeeeeee

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my darling 🥰

  1. the last sentence you wrote

For the sake of creative honesty and integrity, I will actually put what I wrote:

His phone screen, older model, spider-webbed crack, the wired headphones wrapped around it multiple times.

4. a story idea you haven’t written yet

Oh, maybe my David Hollander POV fic! Slice of life, vignettes of the summers with Shane growing up all so I can make David look at Ilya and tell him it's gonna be alright. I've wrote SOME of it but it's the only other thing knocking around my head for HR besides beer league. Or maybe another Sasha fic. What we had cooking in adjacent to...... I need more.

12. a trope you’re really into right now

ajfhsakjsf YOU KNOW I'M BAD AT THIS. I suck at identifying tropes. Let's go with dog Ilya but dog in the way of "let me be your dog / i'm trying to be good / i don't know why i bite"

ask me more writerly asks!

hi!! I want to let you know that I really love your writing style it is one the most amazing thing I have read in english in 2026. I also have a few questions(might be too much) from the writers asks, that I would like to hear your idea about 9, 10, 17 and if we could hear a little bit about 29 would be great! Sorry for asking too much. and would appreciate your answers!!

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This is just so incredibly sweet, thank you so much! 🥹 You have made my night. Gotta give props to my dear friend @cchapsticck who wrote adjacent to with me. A lot of their lines in there killed me when we were writing <3 And I absolutely love questions, never apologize at all! I love to talk writing and writing craft!

9. start to finish, how long did it take you to write the last fic you posted?

Oh, I could go back in the chat to give an exact date but I think it was 3 weeks? I watched the show first, made @cchapsticck watch and Olympians kind of put us in a chokehold. It started as a DM back and forth with some ideas of what a post-Sochi pre-Vegas meeting between them would look like and we ended up putting it in the doc. This is not an indication of how quickly I can churn out a fic in any regard, though. I was spurred on by HR-induced delirium and that we were feeding off each other so well.

10. what is the longest amount of time you’ve let a draft rest before you finished it?

I have drafts languishing right now! I have one so close to being done from the Strangers Things fandom that I would love to finish but I lost my drive for the characters. It's a good fic though :') But I would say 4-6 months at most to actually post something. Sometimes I'll run through a fic and just need distance from it before I can look at it close enough to edit without wanting to tear out my own eyeballs.

17. talk about your writing and editing process

Ah, this is gonna be a doozy. So I usually spend 1-2 weeks fretting about the concept/idea, trying to map it out in my head (unless I am working off divine visions from god and then I just slam that thing out with my eyes half-closed). Writing is - a process. Sometimes it's smooth and flowing, other times it's pulling teeth.

I remember reading an interview with an oil painter who described the concept of an underpainting, where they rough sketch an idea of the painting in big bold strokes and maybe a one dimensional colour and then add all the details in on top. I've kind of adopted that mindset. My writing style is pretty detail-oriented, exposition heavy, not a lot of plot to hang my hat on. I go all in on the metaphors or the internal narrative. It's almost always an in-depth character study of some kind. So while the hardest part is the actual body of the work, my real process comes in with editing, which I include in refining ideas, tweaking phrases, rewriting scenes to better fit my vision. Some of my rough drafts are so horrendously rough, no punctuation, quickly typed dialogue not properly spaced, unfinished sentences cause I only got half of it out of my head before it sputtered out and died. I could spend months editing a single fic if I feel like it's not where I need it to be.

But it's almost my absolute favourite part, like I said in another ask. It's where all my love for writing and language and narrative gets to shine. It's where I feel like I get to work my magic. I may not be able to write a compelling plot or smut, but for the most part people really enjoy my style of writing so that is what I lean into.

29. how easy is it for you to come up with titles?

Middle of the ground? I'm either stealing from lyrics or poems. Sometimes I'll catch a phrase within the fic that I can use or like an abstract concept that relates to the fic. adjacent to actually came from this picture I found on Pinterest:

That hit me like a ton of bricks especially re: Ilya reminiscing on his relationship with Sasha but also his own mixed up narrative on how he is with Shane (Ilya, my best and beautiful unreliable narrator of his own life). The or alongside of just kind of came about when I felt adjacent to wasn't enough; we decided a kind of dictionary type of quality was fitting. I always try to draw it back to an overarching theme or motif within the fic.

ask me more writerly asks!

hello!! i have questions from the writer ask!!

i’d love to know about 3, 27, and 28 💕💕

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thank you so much! 🥰

3. how do i feel about my current wip?

I am incredibly excited for it! I've been tossing ideas back and forth with @cchapsticck for the past few weeks and it wouldn't be half the idea it is if it weren't for him yes and'ing me the entire way. I was going to write it for the bigbang but I think I'm dropping out of it so I will give a quick rundown here:

After a series of concussions that leave him with migraines and a botched ACL surgery, Shane retires from pro/semi-pro hockey in 2018/2019 and is in now set up in rural Ontario, near where his parent's have retired to their cottage*) playing senior hockey. Things are not coming up Shane Hollander and somehow his season is off to an even worse start when their manager recruits Ilya to play (who has jumped from the NHL, to KHL, to retirement, to a stint in Jrs coaching and now he is also playing senior hockey). I can't get into the concept too deep (it's intricate and convoluted) but I swear it's solid (i.e. we have spent a lot of time researching). I's an alternative timeline of them getting together where there was the initial meeting, some hook-ups but I have Ilya drafted into the Western Conference. The rivalry thing is kind of dead in the water despite the media's rigorous attempts to keep it alive. Mostly, it's dealing with disappointment/regret, midlife stagnation, relearning who you are and how to love that version of yourself, disability, mental health, falling in love when you're old(er) and kind of fucked up in a bunch of ways; it's a near-life experience, is how we are describing it in the chats. It's all Shane POV, which is daunting but good, and it's going to be following him as he readjusts to a life post-hockey and post-pandemic while also reconciling who he thought he was going to be with who he is now. That is a major, major aspect. Ilya isn't free from the suffering, but we see it all through Shane's eyes so it's not as apparent in the start. I'm so ready to get it out into the world.

27. your favorite part of the writing process

The editing! When I have a beautiful big chunk of text in front of me and I get to tweak and refine it into what I envisioned it to be when I first set out writing it.

28. your least favorite part of the writing process

The starting. Especially for larger projects. If it's a simple one-shot, under 5k, I can kind of just start wherever and it works. But with a larger piece of work, I need to have a starting point or I feel like I flounder. Cause if I start working on something in the middle, working backwards screws me up. I'm very much a discovery writer but I do have a general plotline I try to stick to or else I will wander.

*I planned this detail before Ep6 when we see the lake they are actually staying at so I just kept it where it is originally planned for my sake

ask me some writerly asks!
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Reblogged radialarch

✍️ more fic writer asks!

reblog & your followers can send asks with the questions they’d like you to answer!
  1. the last sentence you wrote
  2. a character whose POV you’re currently exploring
  3. how you feel about your current WIP
  4. a story idea you haven’t written yet
  5. first sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP
  6. the word that appears the most in your current draft (wordcounter.net can tell you)
  7. your preferred writing fonts
  8. if you had to write a sequel to a fic, you’d write one for…
  9. start to finish, how long did it take you to write the last fic you posted?
  10. what is the longest amount of time you’ve let a draft rest before you finished it?
  11. a WIP you’d like to finish someday
  12. a trope you’re really into right now
  13. a fandom you’re thinking about writing for
  14. where do you get your inspiration?
  15. favorite weather for writing
  16. favorite place to write
  17. talk about your writing and editing process
  18. if you keep them, share a deleted sentence or paragraph from a published fic
  19. the most interesting topic you’ve researched for a fic
  20. in what year did you publish your first fic?
  21. when did you publish your most recent fic?
  22. do you ever worry about public reaction to what you’re writing? how do you get past that?
  23. pick three keywords that describe your writing
  24. how do you recharge when you’re not feeling creative?
  25. besides writing, what are your other hobbies?
  26. are you able to write with other people around?
  27. your favorite part of the writing process
  28. your least favorite part of the writing process
  29. how easy is it for you to come up with titles?
  30. share a fic you’re especially proud of

every day i hear about some shit happening on twitter and im so happy I'm not there

the sugarbaby and sugardaddy bots have found me

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Reblogged dedecorus

"I am looking respectfully" not good enough. Get on your hands and knees and bark like a dog

Hudson Williams was the #1 most talked-about male celebrity during this year’s #GoldenGlobes, with over 590,000 mentions and 9.4 million engagements. He ranked as the #2 most talked-about celebrity of the night overall (via TalkWalker)

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