HELP!!!!!

never forget when saruman literally told gandalf "you've been smoking too much weed bro"

"You're smoking too much weed," says the guy who got addicted to manosphere podcasts on his orb and started a fascist militia with a side hobby of deliberate environmental destruction. Started cutting down trees to own the woke elves.

speaking of peeing the bed it's been long enough that i can tell this story publicly. in high school i went to a party at some house with no adults, as you sometimes would, and at the end of the night like 10 people all clonked out together in the same bed. fully clothed, one of those teenage moments where you're like wow heehee how rule-breaking, because sure a lot of our parents wouldn't like us sleeping in a bed with a bunch of other teenagers and no adult supervision blah blah. fond memories. anyway.

i'm an extremely light sleeper, so i barely slept, and sometime around 6 am, i woke up to a girl totally panicking, very quietly, because she peed the bed in her sleep. and listen. this wasn't a group of mean kids by any measure. but there's no level of kindness or understanding in the world that will make peeing the bed when you're 17, surrounded by people you only sort of know, a gentle blow.

so i sat up and she was like "oh my god" and I signaled at her to be absolutely silent and I said I'd be right back. And I crawled over everyone and out of the bed like a stupid cat.

and the thing is, by senior year i wasn't getting bullied much anymore. i was generally pretty well liked by my peers, but, if this makes sense, people still didn't always expect very much from me. i was still figuring out how to mask (autistic) and i still often said or did something that made everyone remember i'm weird and they'd just be like "well. that's story for you. i guess." and for the most part i'd become pretty secure in that.

so what i'm saying is i had nothing to lose and this girl had everything to lose.

so i went downstairs and i made tomato soup. and by "made" i mean i put a whole can of tomato soup in a too-small mug and microwaved it until it was lukewarm so as to be convincingly "made" but not so hot to burn someone.

and then i walked back upstairs, and no longer like a cat, i clumsily "attempted" to crawl back into bed, loudly lost my balance, and spilled tomato soup all over the girl and her lap and several other people's laps and heads and the mattress.

everyone woke up confused and anguished and i was like, "oh my god, I'm so sorry. I just got really hungry and it's all i could find."

and everyone immediately accepted with absolutely no further questions that I would go downstairs, make tomato soup at 6 am,and bring it back to bed. everyone just begrudgingly climbed onto the floor and went back to sleep while I put the bedding right into the laundry.

i don't even know this girl's name. i only remembered this story recently because i'm in my hometown for a few months and recently a high school acquaintance said, "hey. do you remember spilling soup on everyone after prom? why did you do that?" and for a moment i genuinely did not and i stared at them completely dumbfounded while the memory loaded and then i started laughing too hard to answer for 2 minutes.

the best part is i can tell this story, and even if it reaches the people who were there, none of them will know which one of them peed the bed. thanks to tomato soup.

people keep pointing out how bewildering this must have been from her point of view and it's making me laugh to tears. i never considered it. i had such a solid plan in my head. i went downstairs to find something to dump on the bed and when i saw the tomato soup i knew it was perfect because it has a distinct smell that would cover anything else and a color which would do the same.

i was so focused on my mission that in the 14 years since i've never once considered what it must have been like for her to decide to trust me because she had no other options, sit there in anguish for three minutes, and then watch me walk back into the room and dump soup on everyone.

So Australia has a yearly tradition going back over 20 years, that every Australia Day we all gather round our screens to watch an ad for a certain product. It's so ingrained in our consciousness that the ads don't even really relate to what they're supposed to sell anymore, we all just know.

This year the ad broke containment, and non-Australians are having their brains melted by this bizarre tradition, so international followers, lets see if you can work out what this is trying to sell before the last few seconds.

Happy anniversary to australia breaking the internet

Tis the season

lets climb trees with mama

your month, your flower friend!

@thuriweaver 💜

Very interesting that the name and identity of the ICE agent who shot Renee Good has not been publicized but her name, identity and life are being picked apart by Republicans on social media. Who the fuck is that guy? How long has he been an agent? Does he have a history of escalating to violence immediately? What is his misconduct history? He is a sack of shit regardless, by virtue of being an ICE agent but I don’t understand (I do understand) why he gets privacy and her and her family do not.

really like this reply i came across. skill issue. stop consuming media and start engaging with it. really good sentence.

dude yes

Am I not the only one horrified by the way the verb "consume" has been applied to everything we do?

I don't consume social media, I read my friends' posts. I don't consume fanart, I admire and share it. I don't consume music, I dance to it. I don't consume movies, I watch them. Put this word in the dumpster, you are not a pig and art is not slop, no matter how much the business idiots went it to be

The Samantha Fulnecky essay is so so obviously a setup. Like, the grad student was put in an impossible position but the essay was bad on purpose to get a bad grade, and it's obvious.

the "nuance" and the specific arguments literally do not matter. The essay isn't bad because she's stupid; this reactionary cis woman is trying to launch a comfy influencer/media career off of getting a transgender woman fired.

THIS is Charlie Kirk's legacy, by the way. It allows conservative students to see transgender faculty as somone whose lives they can ruin and launch into medium-sizsd stardom. The rest of transphobic society goes along with it and ignores the blatant transphobia in all of this (transmisogyny in this specific case) and tries to argue about ohh the essay was bad or whatever. This is because if they admitted that this woman was doing this on purpose, they might have to give even a slight inch on being hateful bigots to trans people. Refocus the conversation. This is about a conservative student cynically using the fact that her TA is a trans woman to launch her name into the national media.

I feel like chatgpt came around and everyone immediately forgot what they were doing to get stuff done before. like writing centers, extensions, extra help, templates, office hours, beta readers, random generators, and art and writing prompts have all existed for ages. even if you were cheating there's always been sparknotes, photomath, copying, paying someone else to do it, faking that your grandma died, and whatever. all of that stuff is more reliable and doesn't fuck over the planet. and you might actually learn something

Cemeteries are not wastes of space. Historical cemeteries ESPECIALLY are not wastes of space. The fact developers are continuously foaming at the mouth to destroy them and put a strip mall up in their place should make you even more determined to help maintain them. In urban areas, they are a haven for wildlife. They are a green space. If you are too afraid of death to utilize them for that purpose, that is on you.

ERROR WON THE SEXYMAN POLLS

LETS GOOOO MY BOY GETS A WIN FUCKING FINALLY

(Damn that's a lotta tags)

Maria Skłodowska-Curie's notebooks are crazy once you think about it. They're so radioactive they have to be sealed in a lead box. Imagine a world where atomic theory is forgotten and a dude just goes "yea there's a book that details the secrets of the universe, the machinations of the creation of existence down to its barest essentials, but if you get close to it you fucking die. The more you read it the more your body slowly disassembles into mush." like wat excuse me

It is crazy to me how many cis dudes are like “My S/O got pregnant and got an abortion without my input/permission and this is a worse portrayal than being cheated on and I am absolutely justified in treating her like garbage after I impregnated her without her permission.” especially when the S/O is just a casual girlfriend and/or has bluntly told him they don’t want kids. I am of the firm belief you do not get to decide what someone does with your sperm after you deposit it in their body, you cannot force them to keep a pregnancy or to abort a pregnancy and having the intent to do so makes you a fucking supervillain. You can inform them you’ll be there financially and would like to coparent if they’re open to it OR you can tell them you have no intention of being a father and will not be in the child’s life but you do not get to control the decision.

The fact your girl did not tell you she was pregnant and had an abortion means she thought you were both clear on not wanting a kid at this time OR she knew you would be a massive fucking asshole about the whole thing. These guys treat it like a personal insult and a wound that someone they’ve been casually fucking for 4 months does not want to go through 9 months of pregnancy and have their baby.

Due to recent changes (*shakes fist at tech bros fucking up the planet*) I feel obliged to point out for the sake of anyone who does not have timestamps on that this post is from 2021 and therefore predates AI.

I applaud the guy bravery for not using any kind of plastic to cover his ass in case the egg didn't Don't Broken Even Sitting On The Egg

You ever see something innocuous, minding its own business on the clearance shelf at Michael’s and before you know it, it takes over your life for a few weeks?

So it was with this desktop greenhouse.

I took it home and after taking an appropriate time to “season” my idea in my mind (read: a month or two) I set to make my vision of a mini botanical garden a reality.

I started by removing the heavy glass panels and building a raised floor above the latch. I wanted to use the base as a foundation on the building.

I wrapped the foundation in plastic stone textured flooring (meant for Christmas villages) and built a pond at one end of the same. I then gave it a more realistic paint job and designed a rough layout for my plants and displays.

I also knew I wanted to make the ironwork significantly more intricate, but I wasn’t sure how just yet…

Up next - PLANTS! I went wild making all kinds of plants. Some were specific species and some were more conceptual.

I made several trees with polymer clay and moss, cacti out of beads and flocking, cattails out of raffia, hot glue and coffee grounds, and giant monstera leaves out of paper and wire.

This part should have taken me a long time, but it really came together fast. I loved finding ways to replicate natural shapes and patterns using bits of this and that.

I did make adjustments to my plans as I went like eliminating benches in favor of a simpler overall design.

Then I needed to fill my pond with water. For this I used resin. Lily pads were added to the top layer, and I wired in simple LED fairy lights. The batteries are kept in the box under the foundation.

In a weekend frenzy I added more plants, metal (paper) steps, new (plexi)glass windows, a roof, wrought-iron vines (paper again), doors that open, and a hose reel disguising the latch. Suddenly, a project I thought would take months was finished…

I love my desktop botanical garden. Right now it sits on a simple lazy Susan in my office. But I’d love to get it a proper display box to protect from dust.

Thank you for coming on this little journey with me. This piece packs a lot of joy into a tiny space. I always love building miniatures, and I’ll be doing more in the future I’m sure.