The Count of Monte Cristo (the book) has such a funny version of the dracula problem. In the first third of the book we, the readers, get a very detailed picture of how Edmond Dantes gets his whole life ruined, becomes the Count of Monte Cristo, and concocts the most convoluted revenge plot in literature. But after that, the book switches over to the perspective of characters that did not read the first third of the book and broadly misapprehend the Count's deal and what kind of book they're in. There's even a character that straight up thinks the Count is a vampire.

we, as a society, do not talk about this moment enough

(x)

violet: he’s probably thinking about other girls

xaden: I need to figure out a way to attach the tiny dragon to the big dragon

The Bennets having no clue about the Darcy/Elizabeth drama is so goddamn funny, especially in the book. This fucking interaction takes me out every time:

Mr. Bennet: Lol, Lizzy, Mr. Collins thinks Darcy wants to marry you, what an idiot, doesn't he know that dude sucks and you hate him?

Lizzy, trying not to cry: yeah, ha, hysterical

time to go to sleep… I wanna dream about mr. darcy… I want a man to look at me like this…

Yeah Mr. Darcy’s proposal was a complete turd and a half but you gotta understand. You got your life together. A good career, stable income, retirement plan, all that shit together. And you meet this girl. And she’s everything. Clever, outspoken, funny, calls you on your bullshit. Grade A cutie, right? And she doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with you but she’s nice, and sometimes you catch her looking your way in a way that makes you think you might have a shot.

But her family. Holy shit.

First off, it’s p much ALL women, and mostly UNMARRIED women, which at this time means of something happens to her dad then you’re financially responsible for like. Four grown ass adults, potentially forever

Because mom in law is DEFINITELY gonna need someone to take care of her when dad in law kicks it, and they have like. NO money. So already you’re accepting that if all goes well, you’re gonna be one random old bag’s retirement home. That’s expensive and exhausting, yeah? Imagine asking someone on a first date knowing that if they say yes and things go good her high-strung chihuahua mother is gonna move in with you. IMAGINE.

And girly’s other sisters. Well, one is a sweetheart, yeah, so she probably won’t be an issue, but that still leaves three more, and two of those ones are INSUFFERABLE. Never went to school, dumb as rocks, spend cash like it’s toilet paper

And while one of the two is young still and might grow out of it the OTHER one is actively torpedo’ing her entire family’s reputation by wandering off with random dudes and chasing ass. She’s never gonna work, she can’t build connections, she’s a fucking sinkhole, and she’s being led on by the same goddamn con man ass leeching tit who’s been bleeding you dry while telling anyone who’ll listen that your family is full of ratty thieving bastards.

And if he dumps her after a week- WHICH YOU KNOW HIS BITCH ASS IS GONNA- you’ve got a SECOND UNMARRIABLE GROWN ASS ADULT TO PROVIDE FOR. And you KNOW she’s gonna be a tantrum-throwing little shit about it, and it’s not like you can lock her in the basement or something, you’re gonna have to bring her fucking. Everywhere. And give her an allowance and shit while she contributes zero, because again, she NEVER GOT EDUCATED AND HAS NO MARKETABLE SKILLS. She’s not even good to TALK to. FUCK

And you’re looking at this girl’s father like “please for the love of fuck get your spawn under control, marry them off, get them working on their résumé, learning to sew or be nursemaids or manage staff or SOMETHING, yall got no money and one foot in the grave” and that old man just laughs like “haha yeah, what can you do. lol”

So you’re looking to the mom and finally it’s making sense how she got that twitch in her eye and as MUCH as she is you’re starting to realize she’s the SMART one, desperately throwing her armloads of girls at random men like they’re a bunch of fucking lifeboats bobbing around a sinking ship, like yes Jesus Christ sweetly that life boat IS old and ugly and kind of boring but for FUCKS SAKE PICK ONE

And you look back at this girl who is ALSO REFUSING THE LIFE BOATS BY THE WAY and god damn it she’s still the most radiant thing you’ve ever seen so fine, fuck it, Christ alive, you’ll do it. You’ll shoot your shot. She’s everything you’ve ever wanted in anybody abut it’s not even just about that anymore, it’s about being her best fucking shot at a future, and even if she doesn’t like you all that much she’s still gonna say yes and that might break your heart a bit knowing it’s about the money but who knows, maybe it will at least be civil, or companionable, and even if she doesn’t LOVE you at least you’ll know she’s well and cared for

And so you’ll do it. You’ll take on the neurotic stress mess mother in law, the absent father, the broke ass wingnut no brain no money no future airhead sisters, the bad mannered relatives and the embarrassing behaviour and the impending future of sharing your entire shit with a clown parade of freeloaders, you’ll risk it all and accept the absolute certainty of financial ruin and emotional exhaustion for the rest of your whole ass life and you’ll make your own family deal with it too, you’ll do it, you’ll fucking DO IT, you stupid lovesick motherfucker

And so you go to this chick like “look. Your whole family’s a shitshow. You’ve got fucking nothing and you’re gonna die on the street. But for some reason- and I don’t get it either- I’ve fallen in love with you, and I wish I didn’t, but I did, so I’m telling you that whether you like me or not, I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you everything even if it’s the dumbest shit I ever done. Fuck my stupid Baka ass, I’ll marry you.”

And she looks at you- having heard or considered absolutely none of your months-long internal debate and monologue- and goes “The fuck did you just say about my family, you son of a bitch?”

And the shock of that is enough to jolt you back into a reality where you are able to actually hear and process what just came out of your damn mouth And yeah

Yeah, I think I kinda get it

Yeah that’s the perfect summary

Everyone, we can fix Hamlet and Romeo & Juliet if we just switch the leads.

Romeo wakes up in Hamlet's body and meets the ghost of "his" father telling him to kill his uncle. So if course Romeo just fucking does it, because he never considers consequences, and then gets onto more important shit, like romancing Ophelia, political fallout be damned! But given that he's the son of the murdered king, he'd probably end up on top.

Hamlet wakes up as Romeo and is told that he can't marry the love of his life because his family hates her family. Instead of killing Tybalt and getting Merucio murdered, he's planning elaborate meet-cutes for the two warring families. He's putting on plays about blood feuds and how to overcome them. He either succeeds in bringing the families together or bores Juliet enough with his indecision that the glow wears off and she moves on; both positive options. Everybody lives.

Noctis: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?

Ignis: Rude.

Ravus: That’s fair.

Luna: Not again.

Ardyn: Are you going to want this back?

"Insulting you isn't against the code of conduct. I checked."

Xaden fucking Riorson everyone.

Would love to extend a massive "fuck you" to everyone who shat all over The Acolyte and got S2 cancelled. I can't believe miss blue, white, and orange gets a second season after eight episodes of the most abysmal writing i have ever seen, but the show with an actual compelling story that was reasonably well written gets NOTHING. I am FUMING.

Cozy Fantasy and Why It Doesn't Work

I think I am among many who feel like they should love cozy fantasy and have found it an incredibly lacking genre.

This newly branded "cozy fantasy" genre that has taken readers by storm since 2020 and while it is new that books are now marketed as cozy, the genre itself isn't new. Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones is a great example of the genre before it was labeled and also how to make it work.

Cozy fantasy is defined by many as fantasy with low stakes. Fantasy aesthetic but less sword fights. On paper, it sounds great. But the execution has been less than stellar for readers like me. The lack of physical stakes has also impacted the emotional stakes of these books, creating forgettable characters with boring problems. As a romance reader, I find this frustrating. Romance is known for being a predictable and formulaic genre, the now defunct Romance Writers of America defined romances as needing happy endings, a term romances have continued to follow. Yet these romance texts manage to have low physical stakes (how to date your neighbor, how to confront your toxic friends, etc) while still maintaining high personal stakes that keep readers invested and begging for more. So I was initially confused why cozy fantasy authors struggle to write texts that connect to readers like me.

I think I have found the answer which is the genre is just here for vibes. It is all about aesthetic, not even worldbuilding that fantasy is known for as most cozy fantasy I read have so many problems as soon as you ask one question. It is hard to acknowledge that a genre that is pitched to work for readers like me doesn't work for many of us. Especially because occasionally there is one that works beautifully to my taste.

I often say my favorite cozy fantasies that are more contemporary are short and visual, which I plays into the idea of the genre being an aesthetic. The Bakery Dragon by Devin Elle Kurtz is a good example because it is a simple story that is given the perfect amount of pages and gorgeous visuals without dragging on when the message is very clear and easy to understand. Books like The Phoenix Keeper and Legends and Lattes have absolutely nothing for me, their very clear message hitting the reader over and over so the readers don't miss it and focusing on the aesthetic of worldbuilding rather than the reality of the fantastic elements within the world.

I guess my point is. . . I realize this genre isn't for me since I have realized it is more of an aesthetic than anything. .. .but I want it to be. Should I let it go and put my efforts elsewhere? Or should I keep exploring this new trend and find the hidden gems?

I think you nailed it on the head but also:

So many cozy fantasies seem to do no work to make you like the characters. They feel like the epilogue to another story, or like fanfic in the sense that you're expected to already care about these people, but they're skipping the leg work to get you there.

Legends and lattes worked for me mostly because I had fun with the exploration of how a fantasy setting would reinvent a coffee shop. It also felt a bit like a videogame, delimiting tasks and creating new, small problems each time one goal was reached. Which is to say, it appealed to the part of my brain that likes puzzles, but failed to reach me with its characters. I don't remember a single thing about the love interest aside what she looks like on the cover lol

Stories with high stakes immediately make you see what your character cares about: justice for murdered parents, saving their home from the armies of evil, and so on. In low stakes fantasies, you're handed a character whose values are just the bland goodness people pretty much universally strive for. It makes them both forgettable and unremarkable. And a story that has no plot and very little worldbuilding cannot afford to have weak protagonists on top of it.

Which honestly might bring me back to my main theory of what makes a story good: it's a balancing act of Plot, Worldbuilding, Characters, and usually the stronger a book is in one of these aspects, the more likely I am to overlook flaws in the others. But by definition, cozy fantasy starts off with only two of these, so it makes it all the more important and unforgivable when an aspect is weak. Its like trying to build a stool with two legs.

One thing not really mentioned here (and in other replies I've seen) is that from my memory Legends & Lattes did have high stakes!

This wasn't just about a business failing and plunging the protagonist into bankruptcy. There was the ex-colleague spellcaster out to get her, as well as the local mob closing in. There were threats to life and death as well as turnover.

For me it's more that they were resolved relatively easily. Our protagonist was strong and capable and the plot was largely just a procession of people turning up to offer their help. It felt too easy and predictable. Problems were introduced but then easily brushed aside. They didn't feel real. There was alleged danger, but no tension.

As a contrast, A Rival Most Vial takes a similar premise, and arguably lower stakes, but makes the tension really work by having two protagonists playing off against each other. We're taught to want two things which are in direct contradiction. Suddenly we have a problem where we can't see the easy solution. It's the tension of a tragedy, where we can see both points of view but know they can't both win.

Legends & Lattes didn't work for me because it didn't feel real. As noted above in its favour, it was a list of tasks to be done, and they were all completed in order. It never made me think, and it never really gave me a character to care for. But A Rival Most Vial proves that this is not a limitation of the genre, and nothing to do with the height of the stakes.

Low stakes stories can have plenty of narrative tension and have you fretting and pulling out your hair. The internal stakes just need to be clear, making you understand why the character cares about their goal, and they need to face plausible obstacles - which, in the absence of credible external threats, can be other people. You can write a gripping story based entirely on interpersonal drama, with no higher stakes than hurt feelings and botched relationships. You just need to actually sell that.

Cosy fantasy does work. But it's not just writing a fantasy story, dialling down the setting, and hoping that what's left is enough. It isn't just high-fantasy-light, watering down the dungeons and dragons with something more domestic. If you're removing the epic quest, you need to replace that plot with something else - characters and a premise that would have worked fine as a story in a non-fantasy setting.

It can be a romance, a coming-of-age story, whatever, but it needs to be a plot that could stand on its own feet without the fantasy trappings, and you're just setting it in a fantasy world. I don't feel like Legends & Lattes does that - it seems to start with the fantasy world, and tell a half-hearted story which nobody would want to read otherwise. But I think the core characters and relationships of A Rival Most Vial are compelling in any world, and the fun worldbuilding of their setting is just the frosting on the top.

Also, low stakes is a bit too undefined? Kind of? Like. Obviously a singular personal struggle seems very low stakes compared to saving the world or even just defeating some kind of villain. But I find that the way the stakes are presented makes all the difference for me. A Rival Most Vial has low stakes contrasted against your typical fantasy, but for the characters, the stakes are pretty high. Whether they succeed at their goals or not will 100% change their lives. And you believe that. And you watch their lives change as they encounter and counter the stakes. So it's very engaging despite being very chill at the same time. But if you don't see the stakes as really meaning something to the characters, or get to know them enough to understand why the "low" stakes are actually so high for them, then there's nothing to hold onto. It comes down to weaving a good story, regardless of how tense or active or chill or casual it is.

Idk if that's basically what you said, Ocelot. I just wanted to say it.

"If you're removing the epic quest, you need to replace that plot with something else"

^ this!

"But if you don't see the stakes as really meaning something to the characters, or get to know them enough to understand why the "low" stakes are actually so high for them, then there's nothing to hold onto."

^ also this!

Cozy fantasy can work. It's such a delightful way to dig into characters. To explore deeper, sensitive themes in a gentler way, for the author, the character, and the reader. To explore settings that might be ignored in darker or more epic genres. It just takes work- as does any book!

(and I'm just so, so glad people liked Rival.)

in response to sleepy - stakes ≠ tension! something may be low stakes but it feels important, and that’s because the author has created TENSION.

(also, yes, full agreement. ARMV is fantastic and I will die on this hill.)

Honestly, a lot of this is why I cannot stand people on the internet. People who tell me they don't know why My Neighbour Totoro is popular. If you don't understand then just move on.

Clearly the publishers of these books are seeing that there is something here that people want in cosy fantasy. Not every cosy fantasy is good. I've certainly read some terrible ones. But honestly, vibes are kind of enough to sell a novel and they're enough to fill a void that people didn't know that they had but realised that the void was there upon reading something like legends and lattes.

someone on tiktok said during threshing ridoc was wandering around screaming marco and aotrom finally replied polo and thats how they bonded and im CACKLING

I absolutely accept this as canon

Choose your fighter

they're passing her like a blunt between them