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Demigoddumbass

@demigoddumbass

I’m a child of hades and I don’t need sleep

Some incorrect quotes with Will, Nico, and others

Will : So my therapist was talking to me and she said that I really just need to break down my walls and let people in.

Will : So I’ve decided to break the fourth wall.

Will : *looks at camera* Hi there. I use humor as a coping mechanism.

Cecil, tearing up the room: Where are they?

Cecil, looking under a pillow: Who moved them? Who moved my children?

Cecil: Somebody moved my skittles, and now I am going to start killing.

Cecil: Thanks for opening my message and not responding.

Nico : All good bro, any time.

Cecil: Fuck you.

Austin : Stressed

Nico : Depressed

Lou Ellen : Possessed

Kayla: Obsessed

Will : Impressed

Cecil: Chicken breast

Everyone: ...What

Cecil: I just wanted to join in

Will: Live, laugh, love!

Nico: Die, cry, hate.

Will : I love cooking breakfast. It makes the whole house smell like bacon.

Cecil: That’s true, but it also smells like fire and panic.

Will : You and the smoke detector need to get off my case.

Nico : The waiter at Olive Garden has been grating my cheese for 6 hours now, waiting for me to say when. Customers are screaming. Three people have died.

Nico : I will not yield.

Will : I am going to cry. I’m going to cry until I can no longer physically cry anymore because all the water in my body is gone and I die from dehydration.

Austin : Are you okay?

Kayla: Did you actually just ask him that? Like, you need that to be answered otherwise you won’t know?

Lou Ellen : I'm going the fight the next person who insults Will .

Will : I hate myself.

Lou Ellen : Alright, square up.

Nico : Without ugly, there would be no beauty in this world.

Will : Thank you for your sacrifice, Cecil

*after discussing a plan*

Cecil: Does anyone have any questions?

Will : Is this legal?

Cecil: Does anyone have any relevant questions?

Lou Ellen , in the groupchat: So you guys robbed Will

Will: Yeah, all of them.

Austin: Lies.

Nico : Slander.

Kayla: That’s bullshit.

Cecil : And we’d do it again.

Cecil: Yeah, I'll smoke a joint tonight, but let's not get too crazy.

*The gang proceeds to get arrested for blocking the road in large traffic cone costumes*

Will : What, I can’t be in a bad mood? It’s like people think, “Oh, Will is such a nice person, Will is so happy-go-lucky! Will can’t be in a bad mood!” Well, you know what? Will CAN be in a bad mood. And right now, Will IS be in a bad mood.

Cecil: Am I going to far?

Will : No, no, no. You went too far about 7 hours ago. Now you’re going to prison.

Kayla: It’s the gift that keeps giving!

Cecil: It’s the flower that keeps blooming!

Lou Ellen : It’s the boat that keeps sailing!

Nico di angelo : It’s the serial killer that keeps stabbing!

Will : PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT UPSEXY IS!

Cecil: Could you rephrase the question, in like, two words maybe?

Austin , texting Will : Will there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it?

Austin : Pls hurry because I’m going to cry

Austin : Will

Austin : Will

Will : Will is dead. You’re next. Love, Moth.

reactions to being called straight:

Austin : The fuck, no I'm not.

Lou Ellen : Excuse the hell out of you?

Cecil: Ding dong, you are wrong!

Will : Who told you that? And why did they lie?

Kayla: Rude.

Nico di angelo : *punches the person*

Nico di angelo : Did you ever have like a pet run away and find it or anything?

Cecil: I had a lizard that I burnt.

Kayla, pointing to the wall: What color is this?

Cecil: Gray.

Lou Ellen : Grey.

Kayla, turning to Nico di angelo : Now tell them what color you think it is.

Nico di angelo : Dark white.

Austin : I'm not that stupid!

Nico: Austin , you literally ate the wax from a babybel.

Austin : WILL TOLD ME IT WAS EDIBLE!

Kayla: What's the worst thing you guys have done?

Cecil : Rickrolled my teacher in 4th grade.

Will : I kicked Austin in the shin-

Austin : -So I kicked Will between the legs.

Nico: I burned a town down.

Kayla: What?!

Austin : What the hell is wrong with you?!?

Nico: A lot of things.

Will : No shit.

Lou Ellen : Wanna hear some dark humor.

Nico di angelo : Yeah, I love dark humor.

Lou Ellen : Alright.

Lou Ellen : *Turns off the lights*

Lou Ellen : Knock knock.

Nico di angelo : Turn the damn lights back on.

Nico di angelo : I have issues.

Cecil: Finally, you admit it! The first step to redemption is accept-

Nico di angelo : With you.

I have some Cecil crumbs for you @ethan-the-weirdo

I hope you all like this I thought they were pretty funny let me know if you want me to do another one with specific people

Camp Half-Blood Headcanons

Things that probably would happen at camp. (Also ik that its set in the 2000s but just ignore I wanted to include some newer pop culture)

  • They have a annual memory/yearbook for the summer 
  • Chiron will pick a few kids from different cabins and give them old film cameras to capture moments from camp
  • Chiron takes the “yearbook” committee  group into nyc for a weekend they develop the pictures and make a single yearbook which Chiron keeps a stack of in the big hall where any campers can look back at past ones in their free time
  • A few years back at the request of some summer only campers he has started scanning the books digitally and emailing it to campers/parents so everyone can have a copy
  • They take one big camp group photo on the last day of summer
  •  There’s a section at the end called “camps most likely to” and/or voted most ____
  • Here’s a few of them: 
  • Connor Stoll is most likely to win a pie eating contest
  • Will Solace was voted most helpful camper
  • Austin Lake was voted to have the best smile 
  • Cecil Markowitz was voted to have the best laugh
  • Alice Miyazawa was voted most likely to stay calm in a stressful situation
  • Drew Tanaka was voted best dressed (Piper and Leo still think that’s not true camp opinion and that the voting was tampered with)
  • Nyssa Barrera is most likely to shave her head

  • the stolls obviously sell contraband to other campers (snacks, weed, makeup etc) 
  • Apollo cabin has 1 of 2 CD players in camp. When their older siblings would go home for the summer they would burn CDs with requests from everyone in the cabin and bring them back the next summer 
  • The other one used to be in the big hall and used communally 
  • It got broken during an intense food fight, everyone blames Ares cabin because their the ones that flipped their table over 
  • The secluded area at the top of the strawberry field is known as the date spot for older campers 
  • Aphrodite cabin made an initiative to have the camp supply campers with sex Ed and started a bowl of condoms in the infirm for anyone to take 
  • Will Solace (and the other counsellors before him) will have dance partys to cheer up their younger siblings. like they'll just turn on music and jam n dance, they even have a specific CD for it. (Lee Fletcher started tradition)
  • Katie Gardner from demeter and Rachel Dare started baking as a new camp activity during free periods. They also teach about growing your own ingredients and nutritional value 
  • Hermes cabin (Travis probably) once tried to make slap ass Friday a thing, it didn’t end well.
  • Definitely at some point some older campers in Demeter were growing weed in the greenhouse and selling it to other campers (in partnership w the stolls who distributed it)
  • they were stopped after about a month or two by Chiron who was not happy at all 
  • Once Sherman yang became head counselor of Ares they all got matching pjs (I’m sorry I just love that idea)
  • Valentina and Mitchell’s from Aphrodite like to braid the mains of the Pegasus 
  • Athena cabin loves to compete amongst each other of who can do sudoku the fastest, do a crossword first or win scrabble
  • Clarisse used to take ares cabin on morning jogs everyday 
  • Once Hephaestus cabin built a giant nerf gun that shot meatballs 
  • Aphrodite cabin covers their walls in posters of fashion and pop culture icons like: vivienne Westwood, the devil wears prada, Marilyn Monroe, 10 things I hate about you, destiny child etc 
  • they’re currently obsessed with Sabrina carpenter. Lacy brought the CD of short n sweet and they’ve been listening to it non stop (Apollo cabin has been nice enough to lend them the CD player when their not using it)
  • A bunch of the younger ish campers were obsessed with the magic tree house book series (iykyk) because the camp had a box set in Ancient Greek (somehow?)
  • They thought it was cool how the magic treehouse was kind of like the human vs demigod world so relatable in a way
  • Kids from all the cabins would share them so they got pretty beat up but they were very well loved until the day the binding literally fell apart
  • For year round campers their end of school year Summative for social sciences (geography, history, Ancient Greek/english) they each research an event in American history then explain how it’s related to a specific god and the impact they had on the event 
  • They all present them and they can present the project in any form they want (an art piece, a speech,  a retelling of the event etc)
  • When campers go for their last summer they sign their bunks
  • After the battle of manhattan or a demigod dies before they get to turn 18 their sibling will sometimes write their names on the bunks for them
  • Once Aphrodite cabin snuck into other cabins during the day and hid a photo of Channing tatum's abs under the bed slats of all the head counselors
  • Everyone was just confused when they found this random photo months later  
  •  If you walk by the communal showers on Apollo cabins shower day and you’ll definitely hear all them harmonizing to baby by Justin beiber
cecil: i had kind of a bumpy childhood because of how rebellious I was nico: strict parents? cecil: strict will
Will, hanging upside down by his ankles because of capture the flag Will: all right, fine. If you guys won't help me, I guess I'll just get myself off. Cecil: Nico: Connor: Lou: Malcolm:  Drew: Will: context. Context was important on that one.

my favorite paragraph ever (don't mind my annotations at the top)

he is me and I love him and

@advid-vibe-stealer

people say folks with adhd struggle with "delayed rewards" aka long term goals and as such we tend to focus more on short term rewards. what they don't talk about is that at when we Do accomplish long term goals we don't actually feel anything proportionate to the amount of work we did to achieve it. In my head I suffered for a while and then money spontaneously appeared in my bank account.

I forgot that Americans spell it "mommy" and that therefore "strong as fuck ice mummy" was unabiguously about some sort of undead ice lich, and not ambiguously also about a sort of buff frosty milf archetype like I had been imagining for most of the past couple of years

How does it feel to walk about the world and perceive with such profound transformative capacity

Sometimes I can still hear their voice

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breadbird

Breaking: TikTok is better bc it’s more hostile towards humanity

The lack of video content is what kept us here... I thought we all agree that the best feature of this hellhole was and always will be anonymity.

Tumblr's not asking for my phone number. It's not going through my contacts to try and connect me with my fucking colleagues. I can come here and talk about whatever I want without anyone ever seeing my face or hearing my voice. I don't have to censor myself and hide my interests or enthusiasm out of fear of consequences it might have in my real life.

I think the biggest misunderstanding they have of Tumblr is that they think of it as a social media platform when in actuality it's a blogging platform with social features.

I like the use of Metroman here because if there's one thing Tumblr users collectively agree on it's that we want everyone to think we're dead

😔

wish we were still on Tumblr instead of the void

@kingkit7734 hey look voids

edible voids

THE VOID IS NOT EDIBLE IT HOLLOWS YOU OUT FROM INSI

i give up

Hello. You may not have heard of me. I am a famous detective. And I will be solving the case of. Who The Fuck Keeps Sticking Their Gum To The Wall In This Office Bathroom

The Clues:

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