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@iam93percentstardust / iam93percentstardust.tumblr.com

Hi, I'm Alle! Bisexual. She/they. Header by Mod Stella of therollingstonys. Icon by armoralor. 18+

About Me

Hey y’all! I think it’s probably time that I make one of these so y’all can know a little bit about me and what I will and will not write.

So hi! I’m Alle. I’ve been writing for the MCU fandom for over five years at this point, the Witcher fandom for almost as long, and have a couple one shots in a few other fandoms, and I’m having the time of my life!

A little bit you should know about me if you’re going to follow me:

  • My pronouns are she/they and I mostly identify as bisexual
  • I am a Tony Stark stan. He’s my favorite character and all of my MCU ships feature him in some way so if you’re here to hate on him, you’ve come to the wrong place
  • I don’t accept discourse on anything I write, whether that’s fic, meta, or anything else. I’m not interested in an argument and frankly I don’t have the time to care about that much hate. Trying to start an argument with me is the fastest way to get me to block something
  • This is an 18+ blog
  • I already know that if you’re on mobile, the links in the AU masterlist don’t work. That’s a tumblr bug and not something that I can fix. All AUs are on ao3 in the “1000 ways to fall in love” series so feel free to read them there
  • If you love something that I’ve written, I have a kofi account here where you can donate if that’s something that you want to do

A little bit you should know about my writing:

  • I don’t accept concrit. I’ve written about this before (see posts here and here) but it somehow keeps coming up so please, don’t do it
  • If you’re interested in a sequel/companion piece to something I’ve already worked on, please feel free to contact me either through email ([email protected]), tumblr, or kofi about a commission. Otherwise, the only times that I’ll write those are for fandom events like MTH, follower milestones like the 1000 Follower Celebration, or when I was already planning on writing one like Spoils of War or Bewitched Body and Soul
  • I do accept 18+ prompts but please be aware, those tend to take me a little longer to write
  • My preferred ships: Stevetony, Winteriron, Stuckony
  • Ships I will occasionally write for when the mood strikes me: Thunderiron, Ironfalcon, Winterironfalcon, Stevetonythor
  • Ships I will only write if I’m asking for rare pairs: Rhodeytony, Ironhawk, Ironagent, Ironpanther, Tony/any woman
  • Ships I will not write for under any circumstances so please stop asking: St*rker, Th*rki, St*cky, Tony/anyone not in the above list
  • Non-MCU ships that I’m happy to write for: Geraskier, Joenicky, Quiobi, Quinobi
  • Things I will not write: heavy angst, unhappy endings, abuse, non-con, genderbend, bathroom kinks
  • Thoughts on Superfamily: I will happily write Peter Parker as Steve or Tony’s kid as long as he has a sibling
  • Please don’t send me cheating prompts (I may occasionally write them but that needs to be my decision)
  • If you’re sending in an 18+ prompt: I prefer to write bottom/sub/omega Tony (see below)
  • Depending on the prompt, I may be willing to write something else (see these fics here and here) but that’s based on my interest level
  • I am always accepting asks about any of my fics or AUs
  • If you’re curious about whether I’ll write for a certain ship or prompt, please feel free to drop me an ask
  • I reserve the right to refuse or accept any prompt for any reason that may not be listed above

glass onion really was benoit's day off like yeah there was an explosion and he had to run around in the dark while a murderer was carrying a loaded gun but ☝️ helen didn't keep trying to confess to murder

A student once gave my spouse a course evaluation that said he was "a good teacher with a really boring personality."

I just got home to find him teaching his friends to lockpick while they all watch National Treasure.

Also, the week he received that course evaluation, he was in rehearsals for a rock opera in which he played a singing dancing rat.

I want to write a movie that is sort of the flip side of a Hallmark holiday movie. Not an anti-Hallmark movie, just like the other side of the same coin.

It starts with a well-dressed professional woman driving a convertible along a country road, autumn foliage in the background, terribly scenic. She turns onto a dirt road/long driveway, and stops next to a field of Christmas trees, all growing in neat, ordered rows, perfectly trimmed and pruned to form. She steps out of the car--no, she's not wearing high-heels, give her some sense!--and knocks on the door of a worn but nice-looking farmhouse. An older woman, late fifties maybe, answers the door, looking a bit puzzled. The younger woman asks if she can buy a Christmas tree now, today. The older woman says they don't do retail sales--and the younger woman breaks down crying.

Cut to the two women sitting at the kitchen table with cups of tea. The young woman (Michelle), no longer actively crying, explains that her mother loves Christmas more than anything, but is in the hospital with end-stage cancer. Her doctors don't think she'll live to see December, let alone Christmas. Nobody is selling Christmas trees in September, so could the older woman please make an exception, just this once? The older woman (Helen) regretfully explains that they have a contract to sell their trees that forbids outside sales. The younger woman nods, starts to stand up, but the older woman stops her with a hand and asks her what hospital her mother is in. After she answers the older woman says that "my Joe" will deliver a tree the next day. "Contract says I can't sell you a tree, but nothing says I can't give you one."

Next day "Joe" shows up at the hospital in flannel and jeans, with a smallish tree over her shoulder. Oh, whoops, that's Jo, Helen's daughter, short for Joanna, not Joe. Jo sets up the tree and even pulls out a box of lights and ornaments. Mother watches from hospital bed with a big smile as Jo and Michelle decorate the tree. Cue "end of movie" type sappiness as nurses and other patients gather in the doorway, smiling at the tree.

Cut to Michelle sitting in her dark apartment, clutching a mug of tea, staring out at the falling snow and the Christmas lights outside. Her apartment has no tree, no decorations, nothing. She starts at a knock on the door, goes to open it. Jo is standing there, again holding a tree over her shoulder.

Plot develops: the second tree is a gift, because Michelle might as well get it as the bank. The contract for the tree sales was an /option/ contract, which prevents them from selling to anyone else, but doesn't guarantee the sale. The corporation with the option isn't going to buy the trees, but Helen and Jo can't sell them anywhere else, and basically they get nothing. They'll lose the farm without the year's income. Michelle asks to see the contract and Jo promises to email it to her.

Next day at a very upscale law firm, Michelle asks at the end of a staff meeting if anyone in contract law still needs pro bono hours for the year. No one does, but a senior partner (Abe) takes her to his office and asks about it. She says the contract looks hinky to her ("Is that a legal term?" "Yes.") but contract law's not her thing. He raises an eyebrow and she grins and pulls a sheaf of paper out of her bag and hands it over. He reads it over, then looks up at her. "They signed this?"

More plot develops. Abe calls in underlings--interns, paralegals, whatever--and the contract is examined, dissected, and ultimately shredded (metaphorically). It's worse even than it looks--on January 1st Helen and Jo will have to repay the advanced they received at signing. The corporation has bought up a suspicious number of Christmas tree farms in previous years after foreclosure, etc.

Cut to Abe explaining all this to Helen and Jo while sitting with them and Michelle in a very swanky conference room. The firm is willing to take on the case pro bono, hopefully as a class's action suit for other farmers trapped by the contract--but there's no way it can go to court before January. Which will be too late to save the farm's income for the year. They might get enough in damages to tide them over, but….

After Michelle sees Helen and Jo out, she comes back and asks Abe if there's anything they can do immediately. Abe looks thoughtful for a long moment, then gets a really shark-like grin on his face. "Maybe…."

Cut to Helen wearing a bathrobe, coming into her kitchen in the morning. She looks out the window…and there's a food truck stopped in her driveway. She pulls a coat on over her robe and goes out--two more trucks have pulled up while she does this. Driver of the first truck asks her where they park. Another truck pulls up behind the others. Behind that is a black BMW--Abe rolls down the window and waves. Helen directs the trucks to the empty field/yard next to the house. Abe pulls up next to Helen's car and Jo's truck and parks. He and Michelle get out--Abe wearing a total power suit, Michelle in weekend casual.

The case will be easier if the corporation initially sues them for violating the (uninforcible!) contract, rather than them suing to corporation (damn if I know, but it's movie logic). So they're going to sell the trees now, and rounded up some food trucks and whatnot to draw people in.

Cue montage of Jo and Michelle running around helping people set up while Abe and Helen watch from the kitchen table. The table starts out covered in file folders…and slowly gains coffee cups and plates of cinnamon rolls. It becomes increasingly clear here that Abe and Helen are becoming as close as Jo and Michelle.

Everything gets set up and a very urban, very motley crowd appears--tats and studs and multiracial couples and LGBTQ parents and everything--and everyone is having a wonderful time eating funnel cake and choosing their tree so Jo and a bunch of rainbow-haired elves can cut it for them. At which point someone shows up from the corporation (maybe with a sheriff's deputy?) and starts yelling at Helen, who's running checkout. And suddenly Abe appears from the house and you realize why he's wearing that suit on a Saturday….

Cue confrontation and corporate flunky running off with their tail between their legs, blustering about suing. Cue Jo kissing Michelle. Cue Helen walking over and putting a hand on Abe's shoulder and smiling at her.

I want the lawyers to be the heroes because they are lawyers and know the law. I want a lesbian who lives in the country with her mother. I want urbanites to turn out as a community to help someone who isn't even part of their community. I want Michelle to keep working at her high-power job, loving Christmas and grieving her mother.

Feels like a Leverage christmas episode /pos

One of my big breaks with star wars canon is that I fully think that, even with hyperlanes, they should need several weeks to get from the outer rim to Coruscant. I will write that trip as taking Forever unless people are using restricted tech (military) or breaking the law (Han Solo).

I can accept a midpoint btw. The military can take a few days but the freight travel should be weeks.

But like... it should take as long to get a superfreighter from Tatooine to Coruscant as it does to get a container ship from Japan to Ireland (48 days).

I want to imagine that they (the cargo ships) are also more dangerous at FTL speeds so they have dedicated slow lanes. Extra wide for safety, with really long "exit ramps" so they can accel/decel out without hitting anyone. We want to avoid an accidental Holdo Maneuver.

There are also emergency lanes that are kept clear for, well, emergencies. It's not like you can DODGE in a hyperlane. You can't pull over to let the emergency ships speed past you.

So. Service lanes.

So you have the extra slow lanes for freight/cargo/other huge liners.

"Normal" lanes for personal or small group transports.

And emergency lanes for the military, relief aid, political officials, etc.

So the military gets there in two days (ftl equivalent of Mach speeds), solo travelers get there in anywhere from one to three weeks (you can pay for the faster lanes, but it's restricted for safety; bounty hunters usually pay for the faster lane).

And the giant cargo ship is going to take two months. Because fuck you, transportation is such a crucial element of SO MANY TRADE ISSUES, you can't just whittle it down. It needs to be a pain in the ass. You gotta make it suck.

I have a confession to make... I thought the idea of wireless headphones like air pods were so so stupid when they first came out. But having owned wireless headphone pods with a case I have to admit that I do enjoy them quite a lot. But we should still eat the spleen of every person who lobbied to phase out the headphone jack in electronics

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