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@idontknowmanijustlikereading

Please! Just read your snippet on when your grief stares back and I'm a massive dimension travel sucker! Has the trio been raised with stories of the dead Celine? Do they think "wait a sec, she kind of looks like..." And and I absolutely loved the comparisons to how Celine knows them, with the Mira hair thing and esp Zoey's calculations/analysis.

...do you have more? 👀

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Dimension travel and Time travel are my absolute favorite flavour of au because they can be soooo good in the fix-it way but also in the angst way. I love them all to death.

And yes! they were trained and raised with stories of Celine! I don't think their canon counterparts actually got a super-duper lot of stories about Mi-yeong and Soo-min because I think it's a wound that never stopped bleeding for Celine. She was alone in her grief and with Rumi as a responsibility on top of that. Post-movie and post-reconciliation might be the first time Celine actually has the space and the environment necessary to actually start healing.

Soo-min and Mi-yeong, meanwhile, had each other after demon dad and Celine kicked it, so they'd have healed... better? I guess? It's very much a wound that never stopped hurting, theirs just stopped bleeding.

So yeah, they girls know a lot of stories, and they've seen the pictures, so they all recognize her (Zoey being the first to do so lol). They immediately assume demon at first, until she pulls her weapons out and they all just go "!!!???". That's when they start noticing everything wrong, like the gray hairs, the scars along her arms, the wrinkles in her face etc etc.

ANYWAYS Yeah! have some more because I love dimension travel so fucking much:

And then it just went out. That little light that shone so brightly in her gaze, shone of shock, confusion and overwhelming grief just... flickered out. Leaving no emotion, no hurt. It made her dark gaze look as endless as the cosmos and as cold as the night sky. It was as if their lover had walked away, hidden behind ice and just left her body behind. It wasn't violent or sudden. Mi-yeong could see the moment the light started to waver, could feel when the door slammed shut in this stranger's mind. She tried to force herself to say something- anything. Soo-min was frozen beside her, their girls were looking between them holding their breaths but Mi-yeong couldn't move. Her tongue was leaden in her mouth and her throat was dry. "I see." It hadn't changed. Over twenty years and her voice was the exact same as Mi-yeong remembered it. A gentle timbre that'd wash away uncertainty with the calm certainty of success. But it was still wrong. Cold, detached. Apathetic. Like she was measuring them and simply jotting down her observations. Like she had to. Like she couldn't remember the days they'd spent telling each other their deepest secrets and forgiving each other for their darkest sins. "Celine?" Soo-min found her voice before Mi-yeong could, but it was shaky at best. Celine-not-Celine nodded sharply, only once. Not unlike how she'd respond to an order from their mentor, back in the day. Mi-yeong felt lightheaded. "Yes." She responded, still in that monotone that made Mi-yeong's skin itch. "But not yours."

honestly feel free to ask questions about this one, I have no idea when i'll come back to writing on it T~T

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Yeessss. And there's something about dimension/time travel that really allows you to compare and contrast characters (and how they view each other) that's so delicious.

Ok ok ok ok. A Celine who sees this almost-perfect world (perfect because she's not in it?) but starts seeing more of the cracks like Rumi's patterns and the shame she's still holding. I wonder what she'll make of Huntr/x's relationship to each other in this world - ways that they're closer, ways that they aren't.

Also a Celine who's a sole survivor (and the survivor's guilt involved in that) trying so hard to keep Miyeong and Soomin separate in her mind, leading her to be that cold, detached self.

(But... but, well, there's Huntr/x. She's raised those girls solo and it's so easy to fall into habits with them when she sees those little weaknesses and wants to help them fix it.)

(Miyeong and Soomin watching as the hardness softens when Celine forgets herself and begins guiding Mira through an unfamiliar moveset she had brought up. Watching almost enviously when Zoey takes advice Celine gives to heart and prank-ambushes her and Celine dodges but laughs.)

(They don't notice the matching longing looks Celine throws their way. Doesn't see how Celine sees how they've grown up to lean on each other so much more in her absence. Doesn't see how Celine aches when Rumi goes to them first and calls them by the title Celine has always prevented herself from having--)

I do wonder how the ball gets rolling for communication tho 🤔 This feels like a great setup for lots of pining and self reflection and not a lot of talking

You get me!!!

It's so fun to toy with in my book. Time-travel tends to be my fix-it au's while dimension hopping tends to be my comparison pieces but they're both so delicious to me

When it comes to huntrix's relations to each other, the biggest difference would be that Mira and Zoey were told about Rumi's patterns way earlier, which allowed another level of closeness that canon!huntrix didn't get to have due to the secret needing to be kept.

But that is also basically the only one (very big indeed, but still) because Celine did encourage the girls to get close to each other. They needed to be close and trust each other when they were both on the field and on stage for things to go smoothly.

And this perfect world isn't perfect because Rumi's patterns are still very much fueled by shame. They are that purple colour and while she doesn't have to hide them from Mira and Zoey, she still needs to hide from the world. They're smaller due to the lack of shame from hiding them from her fellow hunters, but they're still very much not iridescent like C!Rumi's.

And something else is that Soo-min and Mi-yeong were very focused on helping them grow as people, putting duty slightly on the back burner. They saw hurting youngins and decided they were more important, something Celine couldn't do.

Celine turned them into hunters and idols, Soo-min and Mi-yeong turned them into people(at least from Celine's PoV. Unreliable narrator anyone?).

But being a well adjusted individual therefore comes at the cost of their skills. They're good hunters and fighters, don't get me wrong! But Celine looks at them and she sees rigidity and technicalities. They are technically perfect in what they do, reminding Celine so much of how she herself used to fight when she still had her own Soo-min and Mi-yeong to fight with.

But after they died she had to do everything on her own. She had to learn to be more dangerous, more skilled. It then translated into what she taught C!Huntris, making them extremely lethal. It meant that most demons that came through the tears in their world were nothing but canon fodder to them. au!Huntrix strategized and still got close calls where C!huntrix would have made a game out of who could slay the demons in the funniest way if put in the same situation.

Maybe that's how it starts lmao

Celine sees them out hunting at some point and Rumi -her fellow sword wielder- does something that's technically correct, but could've been done so much smoother, finally gets Celine to snap. They are going to die just like Soo-min and Mi-yeong had, just like Celine had at this rate! (is the excuse she gives herself. In reality it was honest to the Honmoon 99% reflex that caused her to shout-)

"Footwork Rumi! You do not slow down in a fight, unless you want to try tanking a blow, of course."

And it unfortunately distracts au!Rumi a bit, so Celine tosses her own blade at an approaching demon to banish it. Then she has to think back to all those lessons she gave years ago at this point.

"Think of the ground being lava. If you stay still too long you'll burn your feet, always keep moving." And she can tell this other Rumi is a bit annoyed with her backseat hunting, but she can also see her take the words to heart as she starts moving again, her feet carrying her along with each of her strikes, no longer staying in one place.

Either way it starts her down the path of coaching Huntrix once more. She doesn't have the time to re-train them, she needs to get home after all, but she does give them pointers when she can.

Soo-min and Mi-yeong will see this, see the familiarity and they'll ache. This is what they could've had if Celine had survived. They could've had her gently chopping Zoey on the top of her head when she tried to ambush her. They could have had Celine instructing the younger generation on how to keep their hair out of their faces when they fought (because neither Soo-min nor Mi-yeong let their own hair out when fighting), allowing Mira to finally do a simple half-up half-down style that wouldn't bother her as much.

(Also something something, Celine being in the middle of hunts and Soo-min and Mi-yeong actively panicking about it because of what happened last time their Celine was faced with a hoard of demons something something it doesn't help at all to see how dangerous she has become, it just highlights how different this Celine is something something Celine would also panic if she were to see them fighting demons something something)

And like you said: They won't see how Celine looks on with a burning throat when Rumi doesn't call out to them by name. Celine knows she's not made for that role, she knows that.

She'd grown too sharp in her time alone, she'd just cut anything that she held too tightly.

That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

Also:

C!Huntrix is fucking BESIDES themselves by the time they figure out how to get to the different universe. Celine might've been gone for weeks at this point, they had to lie and forge Celine's signature for the company so that they'd think she was just taking an extended vacation or something.

Add to that the first thing they learn in this new universe is that Celine is dead???? Yeah no. They are not having a fun happy time.

Maybe they come in through a tear or something, so other Huntrix goes to take care of it and. Well. Soon enough the Honmmoon is basically sending out a distress signal lol.

Celine is closest at that point so she hurries over only to see au!Huntrix taking hits from an enraged looking Rumi, fangs and claws out and everything; an angry looking Mira, who keeps glaring at her counterparts hair; and a strangely annoyed looking Zoey, who keeps tossing random shit she finds on the ground to mess up the trajectory of au!Zoey's shin-kals.

C!Rumi leaps at au!Rumi and is promptly snatched out of the air and held up by the back of her jacket like she's a misbehaving cat.

"No." Is all Celine says as she stands in-between the participants of the one-sided beat down.

in .3 seconds C!Rumi has attached herself to Celine in a koala hug and C!Zoey and Mira are actively leaping at her to join the hug because thank fuck you're not dead!

au!Huntrix is like ??? These are your versions of us???

And Celine is just like Yupp. These ones are mine.

au!Huntrix is left just staring as C!Huntrix is actively glaring at them from where they're clinging to Celine who... looks very used to being a human jungle gym.

(C!Huntrix recognized so many of the moves au!Huntrix were pulling and they were in fact Not Okay with Celine apparently taking the time to teach these posers things instead of trying to find her way back to the obviously superior versions. The audacity.)

Anonymous asked:

idek what to ask I just want to read you talk more about your When Your Grief Stares You Back fic pls 👀

When your grief stares back is honestly such a fun little wip to think about, I just haven't had the time or motivation to write on it TT~TT

And it's not necessarily going to have a happy ending.

I want to explore Celine's potential to shut down in these types of situations. We see with the tree scene that when shit hits the fan she reverts back to the mantra, to what she knows(even if it's wrong). I don't think it's a hard leap to make that she might just... shut it all down if things get far too much.

I'm not familiar with dissociation, so I'm not completely comfortable calling it that, I'm far more used to my own habits of just trying my hardest to suppress everything so I can get what I need done done. Which is what I'm gonna be putting on Celine lmao

Soo-min and mi-yeong would probably be familiar with that in their Celine before she died, but what they might not account for when trying to get her to open back up again is that this is not their Celine. This is a Celine that got to live for decades longer than their one. SHe'll have different life experiences, things she had to do alone that shaped her and hardened her.

I want their reaction to fail at bringing Celine back to herself. I want them to hurt each other, because two of them are trying to fill the void with a piece that doesn't fit, while the last one is trying to run from the void.

I want her professional and not rude at all, but distant.

I just want them to hurt each other before they can just breakdown together. Because they aren't what the others want, nor what they need. But they're something.

Maybe they're closure.

This is not going to be a fix it, fix all thing. Celine needs to go back to her universe, where they are dead. And they need to let her, leaving them without a Celine again.

It's just.

Fun to think about for me :)

It gets even more fun when you throw in canon!Holytrix in the mix

Please! Just read your snippet on when your grief stares back and I'm a massive dimension travel sucker! Has the trio been raised with stories of the dead Celine? Do they think "wait a sec, she kind of looks like..." And and I absolutely loved the comparisons to how Celine knows them, with the Mira hair thing and esp Zoey's calculations/analysis.

...do you have more? 👀

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Dimension travel and Time travel are my absolute favorite flavour of au because they can be soooo good in the fix-it way but also in the angst way. I love them all to death.

And yes! they were trained and raised with stories of Celine! I don't think their canon counterparts actually got a super-duper lot of stories about Mi-yeong and Soo-min because I think it's a wound that never stopped bleeding for Celine. She was alone in her grief and with Rumi as a responsibility on top of that. Post-movie and post-reconciliation might be the first time Celine actually has the space and the environment necessary to actually start healing.

Soo-min and Mi-yeong, meanwhile, had each other after demon dad and Celine kicked it, so they'd have healed... better? I guess? It's very much a wound that never stopped hurting, theirs just stopped bleeding.

So yeah, they girls know a lot of stories, and they've seen the pictures, so they all recognize her (Zoey being the first to do so lol). They immediately assume demon at first, until she pulls her weapons out and they all just go "!!!???". That's when they start noticing everything wrong, like the gray hairs, the scars along her arms, the wrinkles in her face etc etc.

ANYWAYS Yeah! have some more because I love dimension travel so fucking much:

And then it just went out. That little light that shone so brightly in her gaze, shone of shock, confusion and overwhelming grief just... flickered out. Leaving no emotion, no hurt. It made her dark gaze look as endless as the cosmos and as cold as the night sky. It was as if their lover had walked away, hidden behind ice and just left her body behind. It wasn't violent or sudden. Mi-yeong could see the moment the light started to waver, could feel when the door slammed shut in this stranger's mind. She tried to force herself to say something- anything. Soo-min was frozen beside her, their girls were looking between them holding their breaths but Mi-yeong couldn't move. Her tongue was leaden in her mouth and her throat was dry. "I see." It hadn't changed. Over twenty years and her voice was the exact same as Mi-yeong remembered it. A gentle timbre that'd wash away uncertainty with the calm certainty of success. But it was still wrong. Cold, detached. Apathetic. Like she was measuring them and simply jotting down her observations. Like she had to. Like she couldn't remember the days they'd spent telling each other their deepest secrets and forgiving each other for their darkest sins. "Celine?" Soo-min found her voice before Mi-yeong could, but it was shaky at best. Celine-not-Celine nodded sharply, only once. Not unlike how she'd respond to an order from their mentor, back in the day. Mi-yeong felt lightheaded. "Yes." She responded, still in that monotone that made Mi-yeong's skin itch. "But not yours."

honestly feel free to ask questions about this one, I have no idea when i'll come back to writing on it T~T

“Weaver of history (unravel thy tapestry)“ I’m liking the look of this one 👀 care to give us an inkling of what this one is?

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Man! The wip that got me back into ff writing and I haven't posted it lmao (haven't even finished planning it, because that's a thing that I used to do! I used to plan things before I wrote them, can you imagine?)

It's another Epic the musical fic, in which Athena gets sent back in time after God Games and ends up right when she started talking to Odysseus in Remember Them.

It's supposed to be a fix-it with Athena trying to navigate making the timeline better, while also dealing with her injuries(that followed her back through time) and dealing with her guilt/trauma. Lots of pantheon as a family, Ithaca royals as a family etc etc

This was his second time in her domain, and the first time in quick-thought in millennia. As his hands glowed golden, blending in with the ichor covering his sister he couldn't help but think about how different it was this time. How horrifying. The first time Athena took him into her domain he'd been but a boy. Divine as could be, but still barely a few decades. It was Artemis who had taken him to their elder sister, for Apollo was unresponsive under the new ability he had gained. Visions of the future had swam across his mind in endless and agonized waves, screams and fire and death and blood all vying for his attention, and his twin had been unable to break him out. He didn't remember much of the initial incident, he just remembered Artemis' shouting and how her hand had felt like a vice grip around his arm as she dragged him away. He remembered how it had quieted when cold talons pressed into his shoulder, not enough to draw ichor, but enough to feel. He'd opened his eyes, not even realizing he had closed them in the first place, and he'd seen an endless night. More stars than he'd ever be able to count were spread across the sky, constellations beyond his knowledge twisting and painting something beautiful against the dark canvas. And the stars had moved. They fell out of the sky and played in front of him, getting close enough for him to realize that they weren't stars at all. They were memories. The one that stopped in front of him was the aftermath of his own birth. He watched from an outsider point of view as his mother cradled him close, his sister clambering up their mother's lap to get a better look at the brother she had helped deliver. There had been no one else present for his birth, he knew. His mother had told him as much. It was then that he had realized that these memories -these moments- were not his own, nor were they Athena's. They were time's. Apollo was the provider of the material, always knowing what came next but forced to live without the ability to change it; the Great Prophet. Athena was the Great Weaver. Weaving the strings of the past into a beautiful and haunting tapestry of history. Forced to always remember. But she was forgetting. This was nothing like the first time. The night was fracturing as he worked, Golden cracks appearing in the sky like glass about to shatter. The stars were dimming one by one, records were being unwritten before his very eyes as he desperately tried to stop Athena from unraveling under his hands.

That was a pretty large snippet lmao. Tbf that wip is my baby and I've missed it a lot.

That was basically right after Athena came back and collapsed under her injuries. Apollo is the only one who remembers the previous time-line because of his own connection to time, so he immediately went out to search for Athena.

(I love this one so much but I've had literally 0 motivation to work on it T~T. I just want to talk about it and not actually write)

Ooh can we see a snippet of Dont meet your heroes (but do meet your friends)?

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More of the side stories for my series "kpdh socials"! It's about Celine meeting all of her online friends lmao

"What you're saying is that the world almost ended and then the girls saved us with the power of love and turned the barrier that protects us from demons gay." Celine fucking Kwon looked almost pained and sighed deeply. Emilia enjoyed every second of it with a shit-eating grin to match. "Yes, Em, they turned it gay." No words had ever been more sweet to her ears. Until the former idol turned her head slightly, a smirk playing on her lips and added: "It was made with the power of polyamory. Not that they were aware of it at the time." Emilia Banes didn't think those words would ever leave the lips of the woman beside her, and it was absolutely glorious. Paula agreed with a happy bark.

I see past and future running free and I’m loving it!

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That's supposed to be a one-shot collection type of fic

It's for an Epic the musical, Athena centric stories with a bit more of a happier twist to them all.

Athena had barely stepped foot into Artemis' grove before the goddess of the hunt had quite literally pounced on her. Had Athena not been a war goddess, she had no doubt she'd be sprawled on the floor of the forest, forced to labour in picking dirt out of her feathers for the next few hours. As it was, she simply ended up leaning back heavily as her younger sister had planted both of her feet on Athena's hip bones while holding tight to the neck of her chest-plate to keep her balance. Athena could feel talons threatening to rip the skin above her collarbones but payed it no mind. Artemis was one of the few gods that would be able to get away with something like this, especially now that Athena had come to ask her for a favour, but when her face came so close to Athena's own that their foreheads were almost touching, she was pushing it. "Goddess of Wisdom." She seethed, incredulous from what Athena could tell. "Goddess of Wisdom?" "Hello, Artemis. Explain." The goddess of the hunt was not cowed by Athena's curt tone, instead she seemed to simply glare harder. “Inside his skull? Do you seriously think that mortal is growing their child inside his skull?” Artemis was shaking her now, and Athena curled her lip in annoyance. "No." The shaking paused. "What?" “No, I don't think he is growing their child inside his skull. I am well aware that his wife is growing their child inside her womb.” Athena elaborated, monotone.

That specific one is about Athena and Penelope messing with Odysseus during her pregnancy. Penelope was bored and Athena was in a good mood, so they decided to take the myth about Athena's birth and use it to make Odysseus think that Athena didn't actually know how babies are born (a fairly large fandom joke lol)

Anonymous asked:

For the WIP ask game:

Don't meet your heroes (but do meet your friends) and When your grief stares you back.

I don’t know if I’m allowed to ask about 2 but I wanted to strike a balance between what I hope is more fluffy and what will probably be devastating angst.

You are allowed but I'm only giving you 1 because another person already asked about Don't meet your heroes, so I'll answer that later!

When your grief stares back is (supposed to be) a oneshot that I've been wanting to post for ages. It's afew years after the events of the movie and things are mostly calm, some demons still slipping through.

One of these tears happen when the girls are away on tour and Celine goes to fix it, but ends up in an alternate reality instead.

One where Mi-yeong and Soo-min are both alive, but Celine is not.

They all stared at each other, Celine being the only one to dismiss her weapons. It was obvious in the heat of battle, but it was blindingly clear now that they were all still and free to observe each other. It really should've given her a quicker pause than it did, she must've been far more out of practice than she'd thought to not immediately spot that Rumi's hair was short. Not short-short, but the braid she was wearing reached her chest instead of her ankles, and it was far more reminiscent of the braid her mother wore instead of the one she usually wore. Not only that, but it was messy. Like it was hastily put up or made by inexperienced hands. And her patterns. She was wearing a short-sleeve, nothing unusual nowadays. What was unusual, what was wrong, was the royal purple colouring of them. Celine frowned. Mira wasn't much better. It hadn't been a trick in the low light, Mira's hair was an angry red instead of the hot pink she'd never gone without in the time Celine had known her. It was also pulled up in a ponytail. In a fucking ponytail. Mira despised having her hair fully up since she felt it tugged to harshly on her scalp and gave her headaches. Something Celine related to, which is why she forced all of the girls to learn to fight with their hair down like she herself did. Mira had still settled for her signature pig-tails to keep the worst out of her face, but this? Celine swallowed. All in all, Zoey was the most like herself. Same baggy clothes, same anxious energy as her eyes scanned Celine's form, attempting to assess how much of a threat she could be. The biggest difference was the single bun she sported instead of her twin ones. That and how obvious her cataloguing of Celine's abilities were. Zoey was supposed to be a lot better at keeping her thoughts hidden from the enemy on the battlefield. She was the most strategic in her fighting out of all three of them, and letting the enemy know what you're doing or are about to do was something Celine had trained out of them all years ago. Celine grimaced. "Who are you?" Not-Rumi asked and Celine felt like throwing up. "Hello Rumi," her voice wavered ever so slightly, not nearly enough for the stranger wearing her daughter's face to pick up on, "I believe I may be slightly lost."

It seems that I’m a glutton for punishment and angst (yours, specifically), so:

“Walk with death's daughter (She'll smile at lightning storms)”

Gimmie more, oh mistress of the eternal angst

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Good one, but that one isn't supposed to be all that angsty(contrary to its name lol, I didn't realize how bad it might look without any context)! It's also one of the few wips that isn't kpdh, this is actually a Percy Jackson au for The 100

It's honestly one of my smallest wips as I mostly have the divine parents of the characters picked and made some of the prophecies, but basic concept is that Clarke (daughter of Hades) got memory wiped and dropped off at the Roman camp (Polis). Unlike in pj she's not exchanged for anyone. Instead, her disappearance just causes a damn manhunt for her by the Greek camp (Arkadia).

Meanwhile, Clarke is mostly chilling with the Romans, trying to regain her memories. It's made difficult since the praetor (Lexa; daughter of Jupiter) insists she's a key part in the prophecy that speaks of bringing down their greatest enemy: the mountain.

Since this is one of the least worked on wips of mine, I can only really give you the prophecy of the Mountain:

Child of thunder will rule the day,
The mountain is cracked open, its inhabitants slain.
An ally gained with memories stolen,
Her importance clear, her fate already woven.
Along comes the sea as well as the fire,
Time will bend under lost love's ire.
To win this war: lay emotions to rest,
Head over heart, betrayal of death.

You also have a "Speak no evil" titled fic! I am obliged to request more information on my fic's twin sibling

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Ayyy twinning!

It's a part of one of my "kpdh socials" series, specifically "Stories Untold", and its about a conversation that was had behind the scenes in one of the other instalments:

All this to say, when it mattered, her timing was impeccable.
Therefore she managed to pick the perfect moment while watching their live-stream to brew some tea and set the table in the living room -with enough time to seat herself as well- before sulfur filled the air and Rumi appeared in a puff of smoke.
"How long?"

WIP game

Rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous and tag as many people as you have WIPs. People send an ask with the title that most intrigues them, then you post a snippet or tell them something about it! I got tagged by @arashisterren (<3)

Funnily enough, I don't have all that many wips lmao so I unfortunately don't have a buffet to pick from like everyone else + half of these are barely brain farts and some of them are actually connected to others lol

  • -By those who've been waiting
  • Don't meet your heroes (but do meet your friends)
  • Speak no evil
  • When your grief stares back
  • Creatures of the Night (Walking in the Light)
  • Weaver of history (unravel thy tapestry)
  • Past and future, running free
  • Bend the elements (I'll bend your knee)
  • Walk with death's daughter (She'll smile at lightning storms)

@zzzzz-cff and @bittersweetsadboi come along for the ride! (and anyone else who wants in, no pressure :))

Dude! Dude!

Okay, I need a nickname for you cause idontknowmanijustlikereading is a mouthful.

But whatevs. What I wanted to say! Do KnowledgeTorch’s kids meet polytrix? Do they become friends? What are their real names, btw? (I propose Rachel for the lesbian daughter 😁😜)

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Anything from my username should work fine, my first thought would be Idkman or Readin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As for your question: who knows? I do, you don't :)

(And the names have already been decided ages ago lol, you'll get to meet them at some point!)

Anonymous asked:

Here's another brainworm: how much do you think Celine dislikes celibrating her birthdays? Based on your headcanons, her birthday must be something that she doesn't celebrate much due to her parents but maybe only tolerates them due to Renoir. And then when she meets her girls, she may even like them a little better. Sure there may be obligations due to being idols, but I imagine that having friends that wants to celebrate the day of your birth may make you indifferent to it, plus you enjoy their reactions, and hell, you might even look forward to it. But after that night her birthday becomes a reminder of how another year has passed without them and how older she is than they will ever be.

And since we don't know when Celine's birthday is, imagine if her birthday is shortly after the incident maybe like 2 weeks. Because after re-reading your fics, I am now stuck with the image of Celine sitting in a hospital bed, covered in bandages, recently just having woken up, where she's now responsible for a whole-ass baby and her soulmates are gone, and she's reminded of how they're supposed to celebrate this occasion, but they fucking CAN'T because they're DEAD, and instead of a celebration for the living, she needs to plan for a ceremony for the dead and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sorry for the ramble but I really like your fics and I need to get this image off my head.

If we're going with my fic universe then yeah, Celine is not the biggest fan of her birthdays in general. Even with Renoir she probably wouldn't really celebrate, but she'd make an effort to get back home to him and take him out for the day, usually saying something along the lines of "you're the only gift i need" to try and ease his guilt when he inevitably starts falling down the rabbit hole of "I couldn't get you anything" / "why are you the one taking me out on your birthday?" etc etc.

When it comes to celebrating with Mi-yeong and Soo-min I am holding on tight to 1 thing and 1 thing only: They don't actually know her birthday.

They know she's younger than them, but that's about it. At first when they asked it was just Celine being work-focused and answering things like "it doesn't matter." "Why do you want to know?" "Focus on *insert work task here* instead."

After they grew closer it became more of a game to them all. Celine refused to tell them, even getting their mentor to keep it from them. When they tried to target Renoir to get their information, they did the lucky thing of asking him separately. Since Renoir was aware of the game, he gave Soo-min one date and Mi-yeong a different one. Only when they happily bounced up to Celine and confidently said two different dates did they realize what had happened. (Celine took Renoir out for a meal after finishing laughing) (both dates were wrong btw)

So they just started picking a random date on the calendar to celebrate. It was fun for all of them, especially since it meant that Celine literally couldn't predict when they'd spring a celebration on her.

The bad part comes with the fact that they died without learning her birthday.

BUT! Celine continues this tradition with Rumi and then Mira and Zoey.

Since she hid her actual age from the public (they live in a world with demons; fucking with public perception cannot be that hard) Renoir remains the only one who knows her actual birthday.

Zoey thought she knew her birthday, but then it's revealed that it's wrong, so now the girls are equally committed to finding out as Soo-min and Mi-yeong was before them.

(The first time they also pick a random date to celebrate on does not make Celine misty eyed- shut up)

You ask for brainworms, here’s one I can’t seem to shake off: do you think Rumi ever blamed Mi-yeong for her lot on life? Like, as an angsty teen or something, after having to stitch Celine up after a particularly bad tear, or after a rather painful spread of her patterns… do you think she ever thought “she almost died and it wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t betrayed her”? Or “I’d be normal if you hadn’t fucked a literal demon”?

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It's certainly possible.

Problem comes with the fact that Mi-yeong is very dead, and people in general have a tendency to be uncomfortable with thinking ill of the dead. Add to that Celine's likely habit of actually speaking good of Mi-yeong and we get into some strange territory.

Now if Mi-yeong had abandoned them I think it would have been very different. If Rumi encounters Mi-yeong again after everything or even before everything went down, i can certainly see Rumi having a lot of those feelings.

But as it is I can see her having them, but I'd imagine she'd suppress the shit out of those feelings. Especially since I can't really see Rumi blaming Mi-yeong that much, if that makes sense? From what I can tell (and my media literacy is abysmal so feel free to debate me with your own points) Rumi's mindset is more "I'm a mistake" instead of "My mother made a mistake(me)".

From my point of view it seems like the blame lies on Rumi's shoulders in her mind, not Mi-yeong's. It's her fault for being born wrong, not Mi-yeong's fault for making the wrong decision (not saying that it was the wrong decision btw, just thinking from Rumi's pov).

So I think she might have those feelings, and she might feel very guilty for having those feelings. But at large I think she mostly blames herself. Or when it comes to Celine getting hurt she might blame thirdlight for not being there (if she's alive).

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