My Knees Hurt

Climbing up Mt Everest in a wingsuit so once you reach the peak you jump off and after gliding for a moment tuck your arms and legs in & torpedo yourself at top speed towards some other climber on the mountain peregrin falcon style, the collision knocks you out, kills them, the thwack of your helmet hitting their skull at 90MPH can be heard for miles, the blood sprays and freezes midair

At the risk of sounding stupid, I just found out how long the stone age lasted. In my head it's about as long as other historical time periods, a couple thousand years before ancient egypt, and conceptually looks like a bad car insurance commercial. Nope! Dead wrong! The stone age lasted for 3.4 MILLION YEARS.

Okay wow i would not have guessed millions. Maybe in like the tens of thousands? But definitely would have way undershot.

I told my wife and they said "Yeah, modernity is a recent and strange invention"

Oh yes! Hello I am wife. And these are the oldowan tools:

The first image is my favorite, the iconic oldowan hand axe, but you'll note there's a wide range of other tools crafted for everything from crushing nuts and stones, to awls and engraving devices. There is some evidence, albeit hotly debated, that these tools MIGHT have been used in ancient burials. Maybe. This is up for debate because these tools are THREE MILLION YEARS OLD. They pre date homo sapiens and homo erectus. They pre date the ice age. Hell, they pre date the fucking ice caps. We don't think humans were burying their dead as we understand it today, but maybe?? These were made by homo habilis, or the "handyman", so named for their invention of tools.

It makes me feel very small to look at these, like looking up at a starry sky.

AND that covid virus is enveloped in a droplet 10 to 100 times its size! The human brain is really really bad at understanding the scale of really really big things and really really small things. Don't let your brain's bullshit get in the way of your understanding of physics and reality.

Have you ever worn a scarf across your face in cold weather and found it gets a little wet from your breath?

Congratulations, you've proven that fabric traps respiratory droplets.

And if a knitted scarf does that, a fine-woven cotton mask does it far better, and a non-woven mask specifically designed to protect your lungs is better than that.

It really does work. The folks claiming otherwise are lying, that's all.

gamers: we are fed up with companies releasing broken games priced at 70$ with day 1 patches that are about 50GB

also gamers: *pre orders every game they want without hesitation to get an ugly ass outfit*

literally she is so iconic for this like genuinely her brain was massive for this. time and time again she is proven correct

I hate when you catch yourself having a thought that hints at deeper insanities than previously imagined

TBH those kinds of thoughts should be acknowledged - and treated as a symptom that signals that you need to evaluate your physical or mental health.

evaluated. it’s the ocd. on to the next question.

anyway I actually think it’s better advise to get into the habit of going “well that’s fucking stupid” and dismissing them immediately when you have these thoughts rather than ruminating on them, perhaps obsessively

Many years ago I saw an advice book for expectant fathers that had a question from a guy whose wife was visibly pregnant. He was anxious and embarrassed about going out in public with her because everyone could see the evidence that he'd had sex with his wife. Should he go out with her in public anyway? And the response was "Yes. Sometimes your feelings are stupid and wrong."

And that phrase has been my mantra against my bizarre anxieties and self-conscious paranoias ever since.

This phrase has already entered my vocabulary re: media criticism where like. The viewer has a concrete view of what they expect a story to be based on the tropes and cliches they're used to seeing together, and when that doesn't happen, they judge it as a failed depiction of what they assumed it was going to be instead of judging it as what it actually is.

"This show is problematic because the hero didn't kill the villain at the end": When does he steal the bread?

"These two characters who were close friends throughout the series don't kiss at the end! What the fuck?": When does he steal the bread?

"This feels like it's missing a conclusion! Like, the protagonist does bad stuff and because of a critical decision he makes as a result of his major character flaws, meets tragedy in the end! Where's the part where he learns better and brings is love back from the dead and becomes a good guy and gets a happy ending?": When does he steal the fucking bread??

I heard this out as "When criticizing something, you must judge it for what it is, not what it isn't"

#look at my detective dawg we are NOT solving this case

@1kittynoir1 replied to your post:

It's not done yet, but it's the facing, collar, and cuffs for the patchwork dressing gown I'm working on! It was less than half a metre of silk/rayon velvet that I dyed in college because the sample we did of that colour was so nice I wanted a bigger piece. (It was PRO MX fibre reactive dye in the colour Marine, and I don't have my dye sample book with me right now but I think it was at 4%. It shows up more green on some fibres and more blue on others, but is always gorgeous.)

I had no specific plans for it at the time, but eventually the perfect project came along, and there was just enough!

I've been working on this thing (intermittently, in short busts) for a few years now, and am finally done the patchwork and on to the construction. I've posted occasional updates on @vincentbriggs and will post photos there when I'm done.

I've also been filming the whole process, so I'll have a video about it up on my youtube channel eventually, but that'll be a while after it's finished because I have so so so many clips and it's going to take a horrifyingly large amount of editing.

It's based on this c. 1835 original, which is a good 50-100 years later than what I usually sew, but I like it and I wanted one.

If anyone's wondering how many triangles mine has, it's 6,957.

Since I've got the time consuming part out of the way I'm hoping I can get the construction done before winter officially ends.

Edit: Why does everyone think I had a bad time working on the triangles?? I loved working on them, it was so satisfying to put lots of little bits of colour together. The reason I worked on it intermittently is because I could not put it down once I got working on it, and would work on it all day for several days straight until I was very tired and sore, and then I had to put it away to stop myself, and then I'd forget about it for a few months.

Also, they're machine sewn. Most of the actual garment construction will be by hand, but the patchwork is all by machine.

I finished my dressing gown.

And besides the velvet, it of course used up a lot of other little bits of fabric!

(Once again, my sewing and other non-dinosaur works are mainly posted on @vincentbriggs)

Video finished :)

It's an hour and 13 minutes long and I say 11,785 words in it.

Thank you!! Good luck on your sewing! And I'm glad my Very Correct nipple observations were appreciated

This post is getting notes again, and I just wanna add some pictures of other things I've made videos of.

Stripey painted leather gloves.

Velvet mite brooch.

Leaf for head.

Leaf for torso, a leaf sequel, now with added slime mould beading.

Very very long and detailed shirt tutorial, which I also did a written version of. You should make one, it's all rectangles.

and Normal Fabric Waistcoat.

I am very slow at making youtube videos but I post monthly updates on the video stuff I've been working on over on patreon, along with 4 extra dinosaurs a month. (and aaghh I know I've been really really sparse with the dinosaurs here lately, I'm sorry!! It's not intentional, there are just a lot of other things to do and also it's been over 9 years and every year I get a little more tired of drawing dinosaurs!)

Right now I'm editing a video for a thing I finished sewing almost 2 months ago, and it's not even one of my longer videos, I've just been doing other things and stuff.

Oh hey I made another one recently and it actually is a Normal Fabric Waistcoat, unlike the previous one which was candy wrappers.

not to make a long post even longer but I just finished another one about some fancy aprons

Here are the 2024 vaccine recommendation schedules. They’ve already been wiped from the cdc site. Save them and share widely, especially to your friends with kids.

Hi!!! One of my parents got meningitis when I was a kid.

They were in the hospital for nearly a month, the rest of us were all placed in medical quarantine, there were several points we thought they were gonna die, and even though they survived, it was a SUPER close call and they lost about two years of memories from the ensuing brain damage.

Like… a two-uear-long cookie-cutter pocket of thoughts and memories went missing right out of their brain. It’s an inflammation of the brain that cooks it alive.

I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THERE WAS A VACCINE.

I WILL BE GETTING IT.

As a partner or a friend of any kind I’m not so much a person you grow apart from or lose contact with so much as I am a decrepit old man who lives in a cave 300 miles from civilization and is always happy to see you

so the cah pride pack has options for buying it “with glitter" and “without glitter” and knowing cards against humanity they just tip like 3 tablespoons of fucking glitter into the pack of cards and send it out

this is absolutely what they’ve done

I did it to myself so you don’t have to

send help

thank you for your sacrifice

I love cards against humanity

advice i think we should tell children is that when adults say stuff like ‘now that i’m an adult i get really excited about stuff like coffee tables and bathrooms and rugs etc’ they don’t mean ‘and now i don’t care about blorbo and squimbus from my childhood tv shows anymore’ bc your average adult still loves all the same pop culture stuff they always did; they just have a greater appreciation for the mundane as well. growing up just means you can enjoy life twice as much now. you can get really excited about a new stuffed animal AND about a new kitchen sponge. peace and love

You get bigger so you can store even MORE love and appreciation for the world inside of you

It means you'll be at the antique mall looking at a coffee table and thinking "blorbo and Squimbus would LOVE this coffee table"

I need to leave my apartment and go to work but there's a female Downy Woodpecker on my suet block pecking crumbs onto the ground where a female Carolina Wren is eating them #womensupportingwomen

But I can't leave because I would disturb them and they really need this right now (it's 3F and going to snow)

Carolina Wretch

nother kestrel griffin scribble