I’ve been laughing at “fuck this lemon you take it” for several minutes

take this papaya from my cold dead hands is sending me again oh my god

badminton is dont hit the fucking ground you stupid disgusting baby bird

every day this post has more responses that make me lunge back in my chair with the most unnecessarily loud cackle

Hockey is I’m gonna launch this peppermint patty at you and the only way to stop me is violence

curling is my two friends and i really want to put a watermelon in that exact spot, but the floor disagrees

relay racing is "here, you take this leek"

I can't quite explain it, but Clue (1985), The Princess Bride (1987), Galaxy Quest (1999), and Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) are all the same genre

They aren't a spoof (roast) or a love letter (tribute), but a best man's speech; an expression of love with a gentle ribbing on ocassion.

Link to the Guide at Project Gutenberg can be found here

A Wikisource entry can be found here.

Mirrors can be found here, here, here, here and here.

Gosh it would be a shame if this got even MORE visibility.

Whoops my cursor slipped.

“you can’t hate ICE agents for wanting a fat paycheck” ah yes. people who are willing to disregard all morals for cash. congratulations you played right into their hands you uneducated piece of shit

you couldn’t pay me an amount even feasible to do this evil shit. you are lower than dirt

This. You can and should judge people for working for ICE, they're people who willingly signed up for an American secret police force that's violating the rights of people constantly in order to act as enforcers of a fascist government.

Basically everyone is not an ICE agent. Like, virtually all of us, the entire population, are not ICE agents. No matter how steep our bills are, very nearly every single American is not an ICE agent.

We can, and should, judge them forever. It should be the sort of thing their grandkids are ashamed to discover. The sort of thing that hamstrings a career forever. "What were you doing in 2025-26? Oh, you were with ICE? Thank you for your time, get out right now."

They should all be judged and shunned for the rest of their lives.

The funniest thing I've learned in the last day is that the "$50K bonus" only pays out after 5 years of service.

Like, lmao, you thought Trump was gonna give you a big chunk of cash? Silly.

I wonder what the actual pay is, and whether that additional 10K a year makes it a livable wage.

99% of them will never get that money regardless bc agents are washing out and quitting faster than they can handwave more through because, well...

Video caption: Good guy who talks like a bad guy 

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

“Oh, I wish I could stay and chat, but I’m afraid I have to take my friend to the airport.” 

Redeemed villain who can’t let the speech pattern go

Most non-Minnesotans have no idea what this means, but to put it plainly: we're raised with not just the expectation but essentially -programming- to assist others who get stuck during the winter. We'll help people we'd otherwise punch on sight if they're stuck in the snow and ice, for zero reward.

This is the level of rage we're at with ICE. I'm not joking to say it's almost physically painful to not help someone stuck like that, and it's worth it because the people stuck are ICE.

The only way we have to express how mad we are above this is channeling the First Minnesota all over again.

The Scandinavians who settled in Minnesota brought with them their Norse understanding of the laws of hospitality: you do not fuck around with winter, that if someone needs help in the winter, you help them as long as they don't actively try to hurt you or your neighbors. Food, shelter, labour, whatever, if you can help in winter, you do.

ICE has violated the "actively try to hurt you or your neighbors" bit of the laws of hospitality, and thus the hospitality has been revoked. They are free to feel winter's wrath against those who would bring harm to the community.

I like to think that Lady Skaði would be proud of her distant children.

Link to original Bluesky post

i’m gonna cry it’s raining right now and i just passed by a family where both parents were without an umbrella but their kid who couldn’t have been older than like 3-4 was proudly holding this GIANT umbrella whose diameter was as tall (if not taller) as the kid. both the parents were getting absolutely drenched but u could tell the kid was just so happy to have an “adult” task and carry the umbrella themselves and i think that sacrifice is what love is all about

hastily-made artist’s recreation in the five minutes it took to get to my stop

My Finnish husband, making stir fry noodles: "I'm not using a recipe. I'm listening to my ancestors. And they don't know what any of this is."

Because this has gotten more notes than I've ever received in my life, some lore drops about Finnish Husband:

He is from the most backwoods part of Finland imaginable, like all his ancestors before him.

He lived abroad for over ten years. Not in a place with good food but at least a place with Not Eastern Finnish food.

His cooking inspirations include Tasting History, k-dramas, and our recent obsession with the Korean program Chef and My Fridge.

He's learned to make a variety of American foods for me.

Despite his wide culinary experience and interest, he still willingly eats and enjoys makaronilaatikko.

Additionally, here are some interesting comments from a Mozilla employee who's been working on these features:

No, you should definitely keep calling it a kill switch. It helps describe my feelings on the matter.

I would also accept ai throttle. Not because I want to use levels of activity between fully on and fully off, but because I want to throttle the ai with my bare hands.

okay this makes me feel a lot better

Take notes @ all other companies

locked the fuck in get my money up

i’m always thinking about that news story where a three year old boy who wandered away from his house and ended up in the middle of the woods was found by this local great pyrenees farm dog who herded the kid back to his unrelated owners house. and the guy was like. whose kid is this

that dog must have been like. hmm. this isn’t a goat. some human must have left their puppy behind by accident. i have to bring this to management. surely my owner will be able to sort out whatever has occurred. that kid was like i’m all alone and scared and omg a big fluffy puppy is here to help. and that fucking farmer looking at his dog like. who’s toddler did you steal???

"Do something about this unauthorized fucking baby please."

Holy mother of curb theory those are GOOD

See what happens when we do things for disabled people? We get shot like this that's just better for *everyone* AND accommodates for wheelchair users

The hoodies are $59. That is straight up a normal hoodie price that is AMAZING

Also noting that this line has a lot of clothing that works for people who need easy chest access or have limited upper body mobility, like if you are recovering from surgery or doing chemo

I've now had a hoodie for them for about a year and can confirm, it is GREAT. Review as an able-bodied person here for usage context. I think of it as my kangaroo hoodie because I'm pretty sure I could fit a whole joey in there (and still have a special inner pocket to keep the joey separate from my phone) (and still have the non-zippered portion for my hands).

Fabric is a VERY sturdy/thick cotton--nice smooth/soft feel. All seams and zippers holding up well, and if you're nursing the top zippers actually work for easy access for that as well. ALSO: if you are a person who hates pulling tight hoodie head holes over your gigantic head, JUST ZIP THAT SUCKER DOWN FIRST, it's awesome.

In conclusion: these are significantly cheaper than my college's hoodies, Imma go check if they have any new styles.

when the weird relative shows up to the farm

i have never seen an animal moving this silly

I have so many opinions on alt clothing because I feel like experimenting with your clothes is such an incredible way of figuring yourself out and building your confidence while also expressing yourself in a way that you can change and customize so easily.

And I think that the combination of "workplace professionalism" and social media (especially tiktok and instagram) are kind of destroying people's willingness to get weird with their clothes, out of fear of bullying or social/professional repercussions or because they've fallen for the idea that the clothes tiktok influencers wear (plain white shirts, jeans, solid color athleisure wear, "clean" makeup, etc) are what look "good" and everything else is awful or ugly.

Went down this rabbit hole of a kind of "couple prank" videos where a girl orders some kind of treat and then the boy says he doesn't want anything and the girl panics and demands that he orders something immediately. I could not for the life of me figure out why they were panicking and apparently it's because they'll look fat(?) if they're the only ones ordering?????? You don't have to live like this there is treatment for this probably

1) I initially thought the first video was cute because in my mind it was like, oh, the boyfriend must love sweets so much that it's horribly uncharacteristic of them to NOT order, hence the girlfriend's panic! But then when she started being like "NO YOU'RE ORDERING SOMETHING RIGHT NOW" I realized there was like. Some kind of other thing going on. And then all the comments were like "Omfg she got a larger size AND hot fudge, she trusted you 😭😭" and I was like?? Trusted you to... what?? When I finally put the pieces together it was so stupid I was like, oh no way, I'm missing a Key Detail surely

2) This is what I mean when I say fatphobia is not about health and I much prefer the mask-off approach of shit like this where fatness is evoked as specter of behavioral laxity and gender failure

"No you don't get it, despite being visibly thin, simply being SEEN with a large sundae is enough to hint at fatness, at least a spiritual fatness. By eating dessert in a group, suspicions of spiritual fatness can be negated or at least dispersed equally across the group, but if I'm the only person in a group eating dessert, I've thrown a harsh spotlight on my spiritual fatness by showing that I can't even curb my appetites enough to cohere to group behavioral norms!!"

Vs "Aww you don't want to eat anything? Are you full? Your stomach doesn't hurt or anything, does it? Okay, good, if you change your mind later you can have some of mine, but only if I don't eat it all first 😊" IT REALLY CAN BE THAT SIMPLE