🦌🦈 he's really mad ..

Had a dream I invented something known as Chatter Chess, where you'd assign character names to every piece on your board and roleplay out the whole "battle" - every lost piece involved roleplaying a dramatic death, every strategic move involved trying to roleplay the move without revealing too much about your plan in the process, people would watch matches and once the Queens started dying people were getting REALLY into the drama of it all and once a King was finally cornered, oh man, the crowd went NUTS

This might be one of the nerdiest dreams I've ever had, look at that. Reread that and really think about what my brain did.

doodling the kids again instead of doing things I should be doing uhhhhhhhhhh this time they have silly glasses tho?

Some sketches for a concept I’ve had rattling around in my mind

(Tap for better quality)

Ford is looking at Stan-O-War 1.5

We should all put floor time in our daily schedule now.

however unhealthy and problematic, the sexiness of cigarettes in film and media is so much more interesting and compelling than seeing someone sucking on a vape. there is absolutely nothing horny about it to counteract the terrible health effects. embarrassing

what is THE worst thing you've ever drank. all liquids acceptable. please tell me what it was, bonus points for why

Hey whoa hi. Hello. I am looking directly into your ear canal. What do you mean you drank a tube of virus concentrate.

So, I was working in a lab, right? My job in the lab was preparing a pure, concentrated enough sample of virus. This is tricky since, y'know, viruses require hosts to replicate, but you then need to get the host cells (and the pieces of the host cells that died!) out of the sample while still keeping the viruses. Once I'd finished and the samples had been sent to the database for analysis as well as a second one sent to be frozen for future reference, there was still some left over that needed to be disposed of.

I, knowing that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, waited carefully for the lab director to be deep in conversation with someone else on the other side of the laboratory. And then I took my chance.

Test tubes, as it turns out, are really bad as shot glasses. Their shape turns any liquid inside into a stream, so you really can't knock it back quickly - it takes a couple seconds. Additionally, the best way I can describe the taste of virus concentrate was "sterile rot". A very unique kind of bad! Made worse by the test tube's inefficiency as a shot glass.

(by the way we were studying bacteriophages, not animal viruses. these viruses are too specialized on attacking prokaryotes to even recognize our cells as targets at all, according to studies.)

(but also like. if the viruses managed to successfully switch hosts and killed me with a violent infection, itd still be worth it.)

(for science.)

You have a fitting blog title

this post is getting 50k easy

This WOULD be how humanity would go out though tbh

how many other types of animals have been turned into people in this show’s universe do you think? like next season they meet a hyena, a rat, and a frog

As someone who ran track and cross country for 4 years in high school, this always fucking mystified me the most out of all the insane shit PE had us do.

Track and field club taught all new runners how to properly warm up, stretch, pace, etc. Its a process, and doing it properly takes 15-20 minutes to make sure your body is ready so you dont hurt yourself.

PE didnt do jack shit, they just said "go run a mile" so 70% of the fucking kids sprinted flat out the first lap and basically walked the other 3. Multiple people did it in boots or tennis shoes. I'm amazed more of them didnt pull a muscle or worse in the process.

I dont know what the purpose of PE was, but it sure as shit wasnt proper exercise. And I think a lot of people suffered for that. If they spent the time teaching us about the importance of physical health, proper nutrition, how to safely stretch/exercise, etc, we would all be better off now.

Let's be real, PE exists to shame and torture the fat kids, and for pretty much no other reason.

*Insert that thing with all the people who dread gym*

this one?

the purpose of PE, as it currently exists in the American school system, is to prepare kids to join the military. that's not some sort of moral-panic hyperbole. that's...pretty explicitly the purpose.

most of the prominently nightmarish features of PE, such as running the mile or doing sit-ups, originate with the Presidential Fitness Test. This test, which president Eisenhower implemented in schools in 1956, was created after a different fitness test (the Kraus-Weber test) revealed that Americans were less fit than Europeans -- specifically the Swiss.

The difference between the Kraus-Weber test and the Presidential Fitness test is that the Presidential Fitness test was specifically designed to test military fitness. While the Kraus-Weber test measured total fitness by testing things like core strength and flexibility, the Presidential Fitness test doesn't really make much sense in the context of ordinary fitness -- only in the context of military fitness. Do you remember being tested on how far you could throw a softball? That test mimicked throwing grenades. And it's pretty easy to see why Eisenhower went this direction. In 1956, the Cold War was in full swing and WWII was barely in the rear-view mirror. There was a real possibility that we would be at war with parts of super-fit Europe in the near future. Eisenhower wanted the nation's children ready to fight in that war.

The main issue with the Presidential Fitness test is that, as pointed out above, it really doesn't teach kids how to stay fit or incorporate physical activity in their day-to-day lives. A soldier at war might need to run a mile with no warm-up, or perform a pull-up, but for the average middle-schooler? The tests were just kind of...pointless exercises in misery. You're only really good at the Presidential Fitness Test if you've been practicing the specific exercises tested. And what 12 year old child is doing pull-ups for fun and pleasure? So instead of inspiring America's children to train themselves into a super-fit army, it just humiliated kids who didn't perform well.

There's been a recent push for PE classes to focus more on life-long fitness (things like actually teaching kids to warm up, exposing them to different types of physical activity, etc). Unfortunately, the Presidential Fitness test has already done its damage. It continued to be used in schools until 2013. That's 60 years of teaching kids to associate physical activity with shame and dread. The idea of military PE classes is pretty much baked into our cultural memory, giving us all a background dread of physical activity. and guess what, eisinhower?? that's just going to make people less likely to be physically active!! Maybe if we're trying to emulate the fitness of the SWISS, we shouldn't have gone with MILITARY TRAINING FOR CHILDREN!!

anyways. take some comfort in the fact that nobody will ever judge you for your mile time again. and if they try, ask to see them run a mile. directly away from you.

The scariest part about this is that I didn’t even notice it. I simply thought I was fat and out of shape for not being able to run as fast as the other kids or get a good grade and not the system itself. We are taught from an early age to obey without question of why if we want to succeed, and I still struggle with questioning the system and not believing everything I’m told.

been a while since I drew these dumbass'(affectionate)

Part One | Part Two

“why would you write fics for small, unpopular fandoms? you’re not gonna reach that many hits in fandoms not many people know about” ?? because I’m not writing fics for hits or kudos, I’m writing them for me because these characters are my blorbos and I have so many ideas, so much thoughts about them that my brain might explode if I don’t write them out.

Y'know. There are a lot of people who say "problematic" when they actually mean "sinful". And I kind of wish they would just say "sinful".

It'd be more honest about their perspective, and it'd save me time trying to determine whether they're critiquing something in good faith or just being reactionary conservatives.

i hate it when game devs put “fixed several issues” in patch notes 

no. tell me what you fixed. i wanna know what the glitch was.

you know those patch notes that are like “fixed an issue where if the player sat in a bush for too long, they’d become the size of a skyscraper” 

i wanna read those. tell me those. 

Adjusted value of Bees. Now that was a special one… because every item in the game had a minimum value, and a beehive was a container for bees, which each had a minimum value… which meant the moment one of your dwarves picked up a beehive, your entire fortress’ net worth skyrocketed… a value used in determining how powerful the foes that visit and try to murder you are.

Reblogging for the explanation of what “adjusted value of bees” actually means, because I know several folks following this blog have been wondering.

Okay but you’ve all forgotten the best Dwarf Fortress bug of all “Flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy” 

Actually I lied it’s the one where after a major update werewolves and vampires started climbing the nearest tree and refusing to come down. It turned out that he’d given evil creatures the ability to sense each other, but forgotten to set a maximum range on it, so werewolves were aware Hell was underground and trying to flee by climbing 

This has to be my favorite patch note ever

Gull inspecting two fake eggs and deciding to incubate the larger one By: Thomas D. McAvoy From: Life Nature Library: Animal Behavior 1965