It’s a good safety measure but any time I make a big purchase my bank slaps my pizza hands. And then I have to log into the app and say. Yes I did irresponsibly make a big purchase. Yes I’m ashamed. Yes I still want to pay for this.

5pm on a lovely winter's day

naming a drink monster is actually scary as fuck they shouldve named it healing safety drink

they should have named it fat dripping monster cock cum drink with stinky werewolf toes dipped into iit at the factory. energy drink

never has an image spoken to my soul as much as this one

me and miss piggy have one thing in common.....

The CONPANION launches on BackerKit on January 22nd at 10am PST!! As a convention goer, the rigid art print pocket is super valuable as I can slip my prints inside of it to keep them safe. But as a vendor, I also use this bag as a personal item when I fly, and it fits underneath the seat in front of me just fine! You can leave the inserts in the clear windows to display your pins, or you can take them out and display your little trinket guys instead. So many possibilities! Check it out here!

Here’s how to tell if a language is easy to learn

Frisian is an endangered language and it sounds just fine. Hitting you very very hard with a very large fish.

Respect minority languages or die by my comically large fish

my mom, discussing furries with me: but I don’t get all the cats and dogs, why wouldn’t you want to be a sexy animal? like a kangaroo

me: mama what the hell does that mean

my mom: so muscular

Clone trooper names be like

-Ryan

-Baseball

-Explosive

-Shotgun

-Bill

-Chernobyl

-Oats

-Hamster

-Hellfire

-Liam

-Corduroy

-Plutonium

Doctors to trans people: are you really sure you want these hormones? I don't think you are. I don't believe you. There are risks, you know? It will change your body. Tell me your entire life story and I'll decide whether you've wanted this for long enough. Oh you didn't know when you were 5 years old? Yikes, ok. I think I'll need you to jump through all these hoops and then we can maybe consider it in...100 years

Doctors to fat people who literally didn't ask: have you heard of this surgery that'll mess up your digestive system, just absolutely fucking mutilate it? Mess with your ability to eat and drink normally? Potentially fuck up your ability to absorb nutrients? Yes, and you don't want it? Are you suuuure? Are you really sure? I'm going to bring this up 1000 more times just to be sure also there's this diabetes drug...

Patrick Bateman if he was chill

I don’t put my mental disorders in my bio since as I writer I believe in the principle of SHOW don’t TELL. And boy do I go on this site every day and show.

I wanna know where people have lately gotten the audacity to leave comments on fanfics talking about how much the fanfic sucked and negatively critiquing an author's fic like it's a published book review.

It pisses me off cause I've seen authors abandoned or delete their fics because of this.

You're getting fanfics for FREE! No one asked for your opinion.

I hope y'all know as authors we get email notifications when you comment so we see EVERY comment that's been left.

We also can see the negative reviews you leave when you bookmark our fics

RIP 2012

Okay guys, 2013 is going to fucking rule. I have a really good feeling about this one. I believe in astrology and tarot and all that stuff. I had my aura read once and it told me that I was going to have a rocky romance. Well, I actually had three, but that was pretty weird that the lady told me that. Anywho, let’s get this year started right! Put on MGMT and dance with me! Wherever you are!

BucketSnarp420

Some conservationists were approaching a poacher’s gorilla trap to destroy it when an actual gorilla stopped them and warned them off while two other gorillas came by and took the trap apart. They had to have thought the humans were going to get caught in it

Also they know what these traps are and are fighting back themselves

people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?

The sandwich i had for lunch didnt moan and scream and squirm against my body and then become limp and pliable when i was done now did it

(Via @morganpdf )

she had some announcements to make.