Robert Robertson is so funny to me bc my guy was literally made in a lab for us at this point.
He’s sarcastic and he’s pathetic . He has a heart of gold, he’s a jackass, He’s scarred up, he’s angsty, his ear is missing a piece. He has a slutty waist. He gets hurt a lot, His only family is a dog. Everyone wants him carnally. He’s seasonally depressed.
He has freckles.
I’m pretty sure the devs had a checklist that read “how to get the tumblr queers” and by god it worked.
The best thing since the release of Dispatch is everyone having a crush on Robert. And I’m NOT exaggerating.
Blonde Blazer? That woman is fighting every HR dating policy bare handed and she’s losing pathetically. Literally took Robert to the most romantic spot in the whole city.
Visi?? Called Robert hot exactly 5 minutes after meeting him. Brings him treats like a stray cat at the Italian restaurant. Incredibly abrasive when Robert doesn’t celebrate with her after the mission.
FLAMBAE??? That man is giving bitter ex situationship. That man hit Robert with the ‘So you’re going to act like you don’t remember me?’ ‘I’m just warming up!’ ‘Now you see how perfect I am.’ Combo.
LITERALLY PATS ROBERT’S HEAD. He calls him BOB BOB. That’s a divorce nickname.
PHENOMAMAN?? Literally asks Robert to dinner. With his GIRLFRIEND behind him.
Robert’s pull game needs to be in textbooks.
