Could someone PLEASE edit Unification so that Kirk gets teleported to Five Guys finally

Vulcan: I regret to inform you that ambassador Spock has died.

Spock:

Vulcan: And also his husband.

Spock:

Vulcan: The ambassador specifically asked us not to tell you who-

Spock: It was Kirk, wasn't it?

Vulcan:

Spock: That motherfucker

hey so what the actual fuck

Hello dear people of the Star Trek fandom.

As you might know, several months ago this zine began work on it's second edition. To that end, we posted an interest check as a link to a Google form so we could get an accurate idea of how many people might actually purchase the zine. This is a critical step for us, because we endeavor to run this zine at a net-zero. No one makes any money off of this; not contributors, mods, editors, no one. To be frank, one of our editors spent several thousand dollars of their own money on the first edition because math is Really Hard. This was not an issue, but it's something we want to try and avoid in the future.

That interest check has been open for over a month and has had 29 responses. Honestly, we can't base our numbers off of that and we can't really continue to put in effort if it looks like the zine won't sell.

Below, we're going to put a poll in this post that will run for a week. Please reblog this post if you're in the Trek fandom and please respond. If we don't get a good number of responses on this poll, we are going to have to scrap the project and remain as a one-and-done zine.

Just so you're aware, our last zine was 151 pages and $25 for a physical copy, $15 for the merch, $7 for the PDF, and $35 for both the zine and merch (USD, not including shipping costs). We're working hard to bring those numbers down, especially the shipping costs, but we can't do our calculations without knowing who might be interested. We realize this post is long, but we wanted to be frank with you all. This project will be dead in the water if we don't know you're actually interested.

The Museum of Science in Boston has been raising funds to build a statue in memorial to Leonard Nimoy (who loved the museum and grew up right near it) and I’m SHOCKED at how far they still have to go. Leonard Nimoy was an activist, a proud Jew who inspired so many other Jewish people to be proud of their heritage, and a lover of science, art, and curiosity. If anyone deserves a statue in their honor at the museum he loved, it’s him.

The Museum of Science is a wonderful organization. They support local programs, they’re partnered with the New England Aquarium, they hand out free passes all the time (I got a bunch at the Dyke March last year), they tell the truth and strive to be diverse and accessible (they let people borrow wheelchairs and ECV’s for free!) and they run on community support. Please share their fundraiser!

I understand if it’s more important to you to share fundraisers for individuals in need. It is a very noble thing to do, and I think Leonard would agree. If you care about this though, everything is appreciated, and I know he has a lot of love on this website.

They've still got a ways to go btw and there's rewards now (like space socks for $25!) so def keep sharing this!

not my tribble ass feasting in the quadrotriticale vault 😂😂

i don;t feel so goox

“Captain Kirk is climbing a mountain”

Jim sees Spock training in his thermal singlet for the first time ✨😳😍✨

Lil old mermaid!AU comic I drew a long time ago, posting for this Mermay, enjoy~!

(Ft. @pali-himbo​‘s Vatii~)

About the next edition...

We'll need MODS!

As some of you know, there were only three lovely editors for the 2023 edition, Talon, Victor, and Pepin, and we did it all on our own. Some of us were graduating, all of us got full-time jobs, and we can all agree that three of us WEREN'T ENOUGH!

So we won't make the same mistake this time! There's no way we'll be capable of running the zine again without far more support. Note that just because you're a mod, doesn't mean you can't have your work in the zine! All three of us had our work in the 2023 edition (but it isn't required, although it has to fit the theme).

So we need more mods!

The primary editor will remain Talon, for this next (potential) edition at least. Victor and Pepin will continue to have contributions as well. However we have several other positions that will need to be filled. Below we'll list them and give a short description.

If you are interested, please fill out this form! (Please keep in mind the time you will have to dedicate to this project if you are a mod. If you cannot reasonably dedicate that time, please reconsider.) If you're not interested, please reblog!! Descriptions under the cut.

Please reblog if you're able to spread the word!

Go on. Finish your sentence.

i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it

Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”

Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”

@sineala

#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan

“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”

*prolonged silence* “oh my…”

“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”

*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”

Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”

The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.

Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:

I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.

Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.

actual footage of first contact makeouts

The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.

That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.

I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.

No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”

And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.

Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.

#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)

Some Vulcan: we could probably just explain that handshakes are intimate in our culture

Solkar, rubbing lip gloss on his hand: don’t tell me how to do my job 

Solkar, rubbing lip

gloss on his hand: don’t tell me

how to do my job

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

happy first contact day! Thought I would re-cap Solkar’s thought process during this momentous historical moment since vulcans kiss with their hands. 

Chag First Contact Sameach! Tonight we celebrate when death passed over but the Vulcans did not

Memes shared by kids who grew up on starships I think they should have sea scout/land scout beef with kids that grew up on Starbases