something sexual about a wax seal

tbh potato is easily in the top 10 reasons to live

a recreation of how I slept last night (very refreshing!)

I got a good idea for a page at like 4am and was sitting in bed writing it on my phone, and when he tried to talk to me I went "shhhhhhh shh" and pinched his lips shut. and then he tried talking to a cat and I said "you can't talk to the cats either."

the rat play area has moved! miso knows less than usual

seen coming home

In a great tumblr tradition, I have decided to rank the "woman scientist" emojis by various companies.

Apple:

I am concerned by the fact that the green liquid in the ehrlenmeyer flask is clearly producing some sort of gas, but she is only wearing splash glasses. This looks like safety goggle work. Her hair is definitely long enough to be pulled back. The chemical here is "generic green" colored, which is a solid choice, if rare in real life. Please increase your degree of lab safety! 4/10

Google:

she's wearing proper goggles! Unfortunately, her hair is much longer, and definitely needs to be tied back. Also, she should not hold her weird purple liquid in such an unnatural way; she might drop it. I can't tell if her labcoat is buttoned. We see here the liquid is "generic purple," and it is in a very confusing piece of glassware. The bottom is shaped like an ehrlenmeyer flask but it has a very long neck and the ticks go all the way up the next like it's a graduated cylinder. I have never seen a piece of glassware like this. Why is it this shape why is her hand like that 2/10.

Samsung:

This woman definitely looks more like a scientist. She is older, wiser. She is not wearing any eye protection at all. Blue is an odd choice for a generic chemical color (although it does match her tshirt), but the ehrlenmeyer flask looks normal again. I think her labcoat is too big -- I suspect she is facing the structural sexism towards people with larger hips and busts in labcoat sizing. I hope she puts eye protection on soon. I hope her lab increases her salary. 6/10.

Microsoft:

This woman might have hair that is short enough and structured enough that she doesn't really need to pull it back, and she is wearing safety goggles! However, her lab coat is open. Her generic green liquid appears to be in a graduated cylinder and is over the top measurement mark, which means she doesn't know how much she has. She seems enthusiastic, but I think she is not as educated as she thinks. This woman is performing science without understanding it 3/10.

Twitter:

Her hair is short, her labcoat is buttoned, her purple chemical is giving off purple gas in a test tube, and she's wearing goggles. This is a quality assurance professional chemist, I think. She is about to put that test tube in a fume hood. I do not fear for her safety. This is a professional. 9/10.

Facebook:

the splash glasses are back! Now with purple test tube like the previous woman. This is the previous person's coworker who insists it's fine to not be as safe. Her expression shows me she is considering throwing that test tube. I fear for her. At least her lab coat is buttoned 1/10.

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

Friendly reminder that asking your lycan partner to turn you is incredibly insensitive! Seriously can we retire this trope already? Not only is it just offensive, but no one would ever actually choose this life! Lycanthropy is a curse. Full stop.

🐾 superhowllock69 Follow

Ok user "moon-moon" as if that original meme wasn't created to mock pack nomenclature 🙄

Anyway I'm not gonna touch that internalized lycanphobia with a ten foot pole. Being turned by your partner is something that can be incredibly intimate as long as both parties are consenting and the one being turned is 100% sure they want it. Literally the only downside to transforming once a month is the pain, but midol works just fine. No one with these "lycanthropy bad" takes ever wants to discuss the legitimate positives that come with this "curse" lmao.

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

I'm literally reclaiming moon moon but go off I guess. Anyways turning your partner is absolutely disgusting and morally reprehensible and anyone who does it should be muzzled permanently.

🌜 impawssible Follow

lmao my wife literally saved my life when she turned me but i guess she should be muzzled huh? we run through the woods hunting deer together and can each haul in groceries in one trip now, but nooo she's obviously a danger to society because she cares enough about me to help me when insurance wouldn't cover my medicine

also it was confirmed that the creator of that meme literally makes and sells silver bullets so if you still wanna use moon moon for yourself that certainly is a choice. source: (X)

🦴 pupperoni Follow

I love that instead of naming the more common benefits of lycanthropy, you mentioned that you and your wife can carry all the groceries in one trip. I think that's definitely a positive that gets overlooked far too often and I commend you for speaking your truth, sir

🌜 impawssible Follow

lol thanks but I'm a woman 😅

🦴 pupperoni Follow

🦇 count-fuckula Follow

Plus werewolf blood tastes way better and is as filling as 10 humans 👍

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

Oh my GOD you vampblr freaks will just flock to anything. It clearly says "vamps DNI" in my bio!

🐾 superhowllock Follow

lmaoooo of course you're a vampire exclusionist

🌕 daddy-fenris Follow

wasn't OP the same guy who said fursuits were offensive to lycanthropes and doxxed a werewolf fursuiter?

🐺 moon-moon4w00 Follow

They ARE offensive and harmful to this community and I'm tired of pretending they're not. They perpetuate harmful depictions of what a humanoid wolf is actually like.

🌜 impawssible Follow

me when I dox someone for making candy colored animal costumes that look nothing like what a real werewolf does

🦴 pupperoni Follow

K

🌕 daddy-fenris Follow

U

"OR WOMEN IN GENERAL"???? HELLO

re-posting bc reblogs got turned off etc

fat little girls deserve the world tbh society is so traumatizing to them

fat little girls can do whatever they want forever actually. btw. it’s law now.

if a fat little girl punches her bullies straight in the nose that’s direct action and also a win for feminism

it’s so boring how you reach your twenties and everyone’s just waiting for you to get married and have kids. what if I don’t want to get married and have kids!! what if I just want to go on weird little side quests and work on art projects!

Problem with discussions about Tumblr Sexymans is that it was an observation made regarding the trends of the characters Tumblr gets obsessed with and now that we're aware of the concept it's not the same. Way too many people are actively looking for the next Tumblr sexyman or stretching the concept so that their favorites fit into it. The awareness hinders the natural development of new Tumblr sexyman

one time me and some now former friends started to play bimboland for a laugh and then after we had a falling out one of them blocked me on it and thats how i learned bimboland emails you when you get blocked with the reasoning for it

EVERYBODY CAST YOUR 2005 DEATHS IN REPLIES🗣️👇👇

WE HAVE A HINT FOLKS 🗣️

alright nobody out nobody in🗣️

During lockdown I worked on two projects: one was a ditch that needed to be cleared out of tules and cattails but turtles lived there. So I’d follow the excavator scooping out the vegetation and make sure no turtles were trapped in it, and if they were, freeing them and putting them in a safe part of the ditch. It’s extremely muddy, sticky work. Hold on, I have a photo of one of the guys:

No one is having a good time.

The OTHER project was going to destroy rare salamander habitat and so we had to buy some appropriate habitat. But every mitigation bank was sold out. I found a guy selling future mitigation bank credits through the powers of making a lot of phone calls and then, through the power of polite requests, got our Wildlife Agency rep to sign off on this plan. Except. You can’t say “I gave seven figures to a guy who promises to someday make habitat”, that guy could abscond. You also can’t be like “I supes promise to pay for mitigation AFTER the project.” because WE could not pay out. We were, for various reasons, disinclined to delay the project. The Wildlife Agency rep — bless her, she really held my hand through this whole process — was like “how about you put the money in escrow?” Great. A plan.

So I call an escrow company — which was not an organization used to being cold-called, much less by someone standing next to an excavator, covered in mud. I was trying to provide only the information needed to enable success and NOT go on a five-ten minute rant on salamander life cycles. Also I was DEEPLY out of my depth.

“Hi! I was wondering if you could hold money in an escrow account for a longer period?”

“… Well, in some circumstances we can hold it for up to 90 days — but we’d need to know the circumstances.”

“Ah! I need someone to hold it for up to two years? Do you know of any companies who’d be able to help me?”

“What. What is happening with the house that this is necessary?”

“Oh uh. It’s not a house, per se, it’s a rare salamander mitigation bank. It needs to be built.”

“The salamanders need a custom house?”

“No no no no no uh. They need a pond. We’re paying someone to make a pond. But! They need time to make the pond. Hence the escrow account. So. Who could?”

“So like a lizard house?”

“They are amphibians?”

“Let me. Transfer you to my supervisor.”

<after a pause a different person comes on the line but also unfortunately at this moment the excavator operator fishes a turtle out of the ditch.>

“Hi! Sorry one second I need to put down the phone to help a turtle.” <interlude> “Thank you so much for waiting! I’m back! Can you talk to me about escrow options?”

“What was happening with the turtle?”

“Oh it was trapped in some cattails but I got it out. Sorry for putting down the phone — you need both hands to grab them because they bite! I need an escrow account to hold funds for up to two years?”

“For a house for lizards? Are you a zoo?”

“Ah! Salamanders, actually! And a mitigation bank, not a house. I actually work for X organization.”

“What is a mitigation bank?” (The critical question!)

“Oh when you’re building something and need to impact some rare species habitat you can pay someone to make new rare species habitat.”

“Huh.”

“But this habitat is incomplete! It doesn’t have a pond. So my organization won’t pay until AAAAAAAAA excuse me sorry I fell into a ditch. My organization needs there to be a pond there before they pay for the property. So one path forward is an escrow account.”

“Are you OK?”

“Yes absolutely!”

“What’s the cost of this bank?”

“Two million dollars.”

<the tenor of the conversation became markedly warmer at this point.>

“OK if you get my your contact information then I’ll email you some options and then we can discuss — do you have time now?”

“Unfortunately I do not have email access right this second. Also I need to get out of the ditch. Could we put a pin in this conversation and circle back tomorrow?”

“Of course, I look forward to working with your organization?”

“Thank you so much!”

“Good luck with the. Ditch. And turtles?”

“Thank you! Have a great day!”