Welcome to the vortex! It's filled with many random and fandom things. (Disclaimer: While mostly tame, mature content may show up at times and will be tagged accordingly. Enjoy!)
When me and my brother were toddlers and we spilled anything liquid, my mom would singsong, “[Name] Valdez! [Name] Valdez!”
Eventually, as we grew up, this morphed into just saying “Valdez!” whenever we spilled something. As far as I was concerned “Valdez” was just a word for “oops!” specifically in this context.
[Image IDs: Image #1: Tweet from verified user Nicole Cliffe (@/ Nicole_Cliffe) reading: If you normalized something (non-awful) because your family did it and then realized it was not, in fact, normal or remotely common, I would love to hear about it.
Reply from Morgan 51 Finkelstein (@/ momofink) on 08 Sep 20 reading: the villain in my bedtime stories was always the President of the Homeowner’s Association and I was sooooo confused when no one else had heard of him
Image #2: Tumblr tags from you-held-the-door reading: #when I was kid my dad and I would play that game at the playground where the kid stays up on the climbing structure #and the adult stays on the ground to chase the kid #usually the adult is like a monster or a lava monster or something #but my dad always pretended to be george bush
Image #3: Tumblr tags reading: #my dad never let me roll down the windshield when we were on highways #because and I quote “the car is going so fast that the wind can topple cars” #and I just never questioned it until years later #turns out he just didn’t like the noise
#also another thing: #you know that game grown ups do with young children where they chase you around #and go “oh you’re so cute I could eat you up! I’m going to eat ya!” that kind of thing? #well when my parents did that I used to go “no you won’t, you guys love me. also I’m you’re only child.” #then my mom would go really silent and fake being contrite and tell me that #actually no I had an older sibling that they cannibalized. #I only survived because I was a cute baby and they waited too long and I got too big to fit in the pot anymore. #and it would make me really angry because I knew she was lying but I had no way to prove it #and mom thought it was the funniest thing ever #anyway I only found out in high school when I was trying for a “lol so relatable” type of joke with my friends that apparently #having a long-running joke that your parents had a dead first child that they cannibalized isn’t a common thing that other families also do #mmari rambles
Image #4: Tumblr tags reading: #my family has a phrase for when someone eats most of something and leaves less than a serving of it left #(usually done to avoid having to throw it away. like leaving less than a cup of milk or just crumbs in a bag of chips)
#we call it ‘buddyfucking.’ bc ur fucking ur buddy over #apparently it came from my dad’s time in the army #Anyways. i quickly learned when i went to college that when most people hear 'alright who buddyfucked me’ #they do Not think i am asking who left one square of toilet paper on the roll without changing it /End IDs]
I want a dachshund or other small dog because it seems like a good middle ground
Sorry for the unsolicited advice, but please do think it over. Dachshunds (and many other small breeds) actually require quite a lot of activity and exercise (mental and physical)*. If those needs aren’t met, that can cause so many difficult behavioral problems. They’re working dogs, after all: if they aren’t given a job, they’ll find one themselves (and it’ll be likely something very annoying or unpleasant to you)
*yes, it does depend on the individual dog, but the general tendency points to those breeds being high energy
Also, a lot of people who do like cats want a Maine Coon because they’ve seen pictures of mine or others’, and they’re majestic! Huge!! Fluffy!!! Such a good kitty!!!!
Maine Coons are dog-smart, and basically tiny thumbless toddlers who will never grow up. They have long memories, they hold grudges, and they want things the way they want them. What you want is probably not a Maine Coon. I love them, but jumping from “cat” to “Maine Coon” is like jumping from “dog” to “border collie”. Don’t do that unless you know what you’re getting into.
If you think you want a Maine Coon but what Seanan has said above does not appeal, what you probably actually want is a Ragdoll, or actually actually a domestic longhair.
If you want the middle ground between ‘cat’ and 'dog’ in personality, you want one of the big sighthounds. Greyhounds and up are couch potato buddies BUT now you need the physical infrastructure and financial resources to contain and support a carnivore the size of a small pony that has a seven-foot vertical leap, all the common sense and impulse control god gave a garden hose, and land speeds exceeding 35 miles per hour. So maybe reconsider a cat.
and don’t get a Ragdoll (or scottish fold or munchkin) unless you’re 100% sure you’ll be able to afford years of buying pain medication (and if failing that bad behaviour like peeing places and agression) because these breeds have joint pain built into them.
Farmer family friend has an out of control mint problem around one of his greenhouses because he had a potted mint plant that he set on the ground and it grew a tendril out of the pot which touched the soil and grew roots.
It had never occurred to me before that a potted plant could escape.
When I was in elementary school we had a ton of mint growing under a bush in our front yard and once I found out it was mint and edible I fucking devoured ALL of it in a week and it never came back
1. know they are scamming you with dangerous pseudoscience so you shouldnt let them near your neck or give them money
or
2. genuinely believe their dangerous pseudoscience so you shouldnt let them near your neck or give them money
and thats simply the facts of the matter unfortunately. maybe you disagree and thats your right and id never try to take that away from you but you are unfortunately completely wrong and i would encourage looking up more about this
At best, chiropractor adjustments are as effective as a massage and at worst they can kill you. Just get a massage, those won’t kill you and they are usually cheaper.
^^^ its literally this. any actual effective treatment a chiropractor does to you, it is something they borrowed from massage/physiotherapy. the massage and physiotherapy technicians will do all the stuff that actually works and promotes healing, and NONE of the stuff that creates a blood clot that takes three months to get to your brain and kill you (which will not be blamed on the chiropractor even when it should be). everyone in the notes going “but i feel better after i see my chiro thats why i keep going back :(” is experiencing the short-term improvements you will get from any form of physical touch in a medical context, this has been extensively studied. the fact that the underlying issue remains is part of the chiropracty scam.
There’s a scene in very early 60’s Doctor Who where a character falls into a swamp, I think, and they throw not a rag doll, but a card board cut out of the actor. 10/10 they don’t make ‘em like this no more
PSA the “si” in shared YouTube links stand for Seal Indicator. This means there is a nefarious seal tracking your information and will give YouTube your data in exchange for fish. Please remove the part after “?si=” before you click on it or share the link with others because it is a tracking token!
It really says something that a lot of monogamous people consider polyamorous and aromantic to be “opposites” but every polyam person I know took one look at aromantics and said “they’re just like me for real”
Poly folks x aro folks in the sense that “alloromantic heterosexual monogamous people view love and sex as an entirely different entity than me, and that makes life kinda strange”
So many people never learned to live with harmless discomfort at any point in their lives and holy fuck does it show
“But I wanna know!” You’re gonna have to learn to be ok with not knowing some things, especially when those things involve personal details about strangers that they’re not comfortable sharing.
“But it’s confusing!” If you take the time to educate yourself it’ll no longer be confusing. Otherwise you’re just gonna have to learn to be ok with being confused.
“But it’s weird!” You probably do weird things all the time. Everyone does weird things sometimes. Life goes on.
“But it scares me!” Is it hurting you? No? You’ll be fine. Being scared and being harmed are not always the same thing. Learn to tell the difference and then act accordingly.
“But I want it!” And I want a million dollars. You can’t always get what you want.
A lot of people were also never told “no” as children and the consequences of that manifest in similar ways. Learn to be ok with being told “no.” You’re not gonna die if you don’t get your way in every single situation ever.
The reason AI programs like Gemini are programmed to encourage you to let it make basic life choices for you like what restaurant you should eat at is because they intend to monetize your patronage.
It’s just a matter of time before the AI stops offering you the most highly rated option in the area or whatever aligns most closely to what you requested (If it’s even doing that now) and instead only recommends restaurants that have paid the company for that privilege.
Restaurants that won’t pay Google to recommend them to AI users are going to become functionally invisible, whereas those who are willing to purchase what amounts to targeted advertisements laundered through an AI “friend” will get new customers regardless of their quality.
Basic rule: If you aren’t paying for something, that means you’re the product.
Google Maps already does this, preferring more distant sponsored results over closer non-sponsored ones. All the claims that these algorithms make the same choices you would make if you just had the time and energy to research them are totally false. They make the choices that lead to profitable results for the companies that program them, with a user interface that gaslights you into thinking it was your idea all along.
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