I want to know about Wardrobe Malfunction, it sounds interesting.
I imagine it going two ways, I could be wrong ofc. Either it's spicy or Rumi's patterns get revealed early and it's kinda of just dramatic (spicy later?) Lol, I'm probably wrong lol.
Basically Rumi’s patterns slip out while practicing the golden performance. Something that actually does happen in the Movie.
Her patterns are clearly visible on her right wrist in the first two images and are even peaking out slightly on her left wrist in the third Image.
The basic idea for this fic is that Zoey notices during practice/filming but since she isn’t 100% sure she saw what she thinks she saw she asks Bobby for the recordings.
Also I don’t think anyone will come after me for timeline inaccuracies like “oh her patterns obviously spread during free with Jinu, the patterns weren’t that bad when practicing” and to that I present her patterns slipping out during the golden music video which was likely filmed months before the the Sajapocalypse
"I spent my whole life keeping this secret, this shame of what I am, and the more I had the shame, the more it grew and grew until it started to destroy the one thing that gave me a purpose: my voice."
she's got a lot of processing to do. and oh, how they wish they could do more than hold her through it, on those days the hurt sucks all the air from the room. oh, how they wish they could bear it for her.
.Rumi had figured something was wrong with her from a very young age
.She wasn't like other children - she had to be prompted to talk to people, and she never knew what to say or how to act or the amount of eye contact that was "appropriate"
.Rumi couldn't stand the sound of Velcro ripping or being exposed to loud, bright environments for more then five minutes. she could not wear woolen sweaters, and she knew she was odd, but she never knew why
.It never failed to get under her skin
.She coped by becoming completely monotone - figuring that if she never talked to people at all, she couldn't do anything wrong. She was all too aware that people mocked her for it - though she could never quite tell when, or how exactly, it was just a feeling. Something fickle and intangible which made her face burn blotchy scarlet-red with shame
.Whenever she became too overwhelmed, she simply wondered over to Celine and gripped at the woman's hand until she got sent to her room. She had always liked her room; it was safe.
.She could control everything there - how she arranged her collections, the brightness of the lights, how the room smelled, and so on
.Over the years of becoming famous she had built a mask thick and impenetrable as stone; she timed how long she made eye contact, 1, 2, 3 look away. focus on their nose, look at the wall, 1, 2, 3...
.she ran every word through filters of; How would that make them feel? Does it sound odd? What would Zoey say? Is that rude?
.She learnt that fiddling with her hair was acceptable, fidgeting with pens was also acceptable - only if she was quiet, of course. She learnt that if she asked people lots of questions, not only would they feel validated, but she wouldn't have to talk.
.She couldn't quite understand why flapping her hands was not acceptable, or why there was even such rigid rules to begin with - but that didn't matter - she was finally accepted
.This began to change when she met Mira and Zoey. It was a very small thing to begin with; Rumi was feeling quite anxious, and when she was anxious she could only handle simple food with predictable textures.
.Things like rice with soy sauce and buttered toast. She hadn't thought anyone had noticed before, and tried to hide it as best as she could. they where childish foods - or at least Celine said so - and it was just another part of her wrongness.
.They where at a restaurant - the four of them, to celebrate there debuted single which had rose into the top ten on the charts.
.Rumi hadn't entered the restaurant with high energy levels, the clutter of plates and overly harsh lights and constant chatter grated on her skin
.She was perfectly prepared to just push though the meal and cuddle up in her bedroom. Zoey had ordered for the table - something she had always loved to do - and asked for plain rice.
.Rumi's stomach twisted in jealously - but she kept sielnt
.Eventually the food arrived and she prepared herself to dig into the fried, savory dumplings and simply grit her teeth. But Zoey plucked the tray from beneath her hands, sliding over a bowl of freshly steamed rice.
.Rumi looked over too Celine - but the woman had not seemed to notice at all, She looked to Zoey, who gave her a wide, almost nervous smile.
.She let down the mask a bit more after that; the girls never laughed at her for her weird-wrongness, they where even like her, in some ways at least. Zoey could never stay still, she was constantly talking to fast for her own mind to catch up, would go on for hours about turtles if you let her, and perhaps even if you didn't.
.Mira was even more reclusive than she was. Would shamelessly lurk in the back of party's, wearing headphones and scrolling though her phone. She said what Rumi would've said if she aloud herself too, and she never apologized for being herself.
.The mask never went away - sometimes she doubted she could live without it, not within her career, at least - but she found a balance. It was nice to not be the weirdest person in the room, to live in a herd of black sheep.
"And to me, what makes up Rumi is her ability to keep hoping and *choosing* to be hopeful even when shit is bad. This is a character who chooses to believe that things will work out and then puts in the work to make it happen.
This is a character who knows her hope might be misplaced or overly optimistic but makes the choice to believe anyways. This is a character who marches up to Gwi-ma with nothing but a song and the hope that Zoey and Mira will join her."
I really liked this summary, and I agree. Sometimes I think we (fandom in general) woobify her a bit too much. Her confidence and hope are as much a part of her as the shame and fear.
The thing is, as far as I can tell, Rumi’s shame and fear is entirely wrapped around her patterns.
Like, she doesn’t seem to be insecure about *anything else.*
Her reaction to demons is ugh they’re interrupting our snacking.
Her reaction to food is to stuff her face.
Her reaction to the Saja Boys is to show up to a variety show so they can murder them off stage.
Her reaction to that failing is to come up with the idea of writing a diss track and immediately start assigning jobs. (Hey everyone does remember that Takedown was Rumi’s brainchild right?)
This woman genuinely does not seem like she can wrap her head around the idea that she might not be someone’s type.
(Also I feel like the fandom play up her fear way way too much. This lady feels a negative emotion and gets pissed off.)
(Honesty also why I can’t read a lot of polytrix fic because of how Rumi gets characterized into this shrinking violet who’s apologizing every three seconds and I’m like…I think we watched very different movies.)
I’m just thinking about tiny baby trans Rumi who hasn’t yet figured out what the Girl Feelings are refusing to have a hair cut like “no Cece I want to have princess hair!!!” and Celine just like “okay kiddo” and then looking back on that in a few years going “hmmmm”
Tiny baby trans Rumi playing with Celine’s make up and jewelery and dancing around in one of Celine’s old skirts (a glittery mess that was shockingly yellow, why did she still have that), “I’m gonna be an idol like you and mama!”
Tiny baby trans Rumi shyly coming up to Celine with Celine’s lipstick being like, “Can you make me pretty like you, Cece?”
And Celine, in her head, being like hmm. This does not seem like Boy Things but the parenting books say that kids tend to emulate adults in their lives and that she should encourage their interests.
So she just shrugs and goes along with it; buys Rumi her own make up kit, skirts that are her size (and are less ugly) to twirl around in.
(And when she’s signing Rumi up for school, she comes across the question is your child a boy or girl?
And she’s like…huh. And she looks over at Rumi, who’s hair is down to the middle of her back and pleated today and wearing her dangly clip on ear rings.
And she’s like, “Rumi, do you want to be called a boy or a girl?”
And Rumi grins up at her and with all the conviction children have, says, “I wanna be a gjrl, Cece!”)
(Years later, Rumi is telling this story to Mira and Mira just stares at her. And then stares at Celine.
And is like, “Celine said that?? Miss Uptight, Faults And Fears Must Never Be Seen said that??”)
(Even later, Mira wakes up at like 2am and is like WAIT BUT SHE HAD PROBLEMS WITH YOUR PATTERNS???
And Rumi is like, “my mother contains multitudes, Mira. Go back to bed.”)
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