Ok, so it’s been a minute since the Teen Wolf movie came out and I finally have the perspective to think about how I would turn it into a canon-compliant and resource-consistent movie rewrite. 

If I’m limited to the actors that signed on and the general plot beats of Allison coming back to life, getting the band back together, using the nemeton in some way, Harris and Eli hale. Here is how I would have done it: (please note I have hindsight and no writing ability and even though I mention Monroe a lot she will not actually need to be on screen to comply with not having her actor in the movie)

We kick off not in Japan, not with Scott, none of that. 

Beacon Hills is now a supernatural open town in a county that has spent years dealing with the result of an active nemeton. We imply changes through cut shots, like mystic shops and familiar names on fliers.  We use the whole county for the surrounding areas to show off these Suttle changes to known locations. Pictures of the original cast in the trophy cases at the high school, the McCall clinic on an open shot of what was once Deaton’s vet office, Mason and Parrish getting into a squad car outside the station. Hale Mechanics and audio body store (more like an AutoZone vibe to cement it more into the community). Kids getting out of class or practice doing a casual backflip down the stairs and another kid pushing them for “showing off” the jeep driving fast down the main street. 

We can have a voice-over explaining the main antagonist of the series, the hunters, and how BH though not completely open has accepted supernaturals in a low-number situation as Monroe spent years building up her militia. They did exactly what the show told us they would do, they followed the beacon to the town and found someplace safe. Monroe and the hunters after the death of the final big bad in season 6 and prolonged investment from the BH pack that we see in the time skip of the last episode, were basically reduced to code breakers and young hunters in the last few years. Everyone we know grew up and used their connections to take them down.

We cut to a flashback of a mass arrest of hunters with a joint sheriff’s department and FBI takedown (this is an illusion to Stiles who will not be in the film because we are sticking to actors who signed on to return)

Then we go back to the present day where we get a bit of a where are they now, how everyone settled into new roles, This is shown to us through little Vignette not just told to us but again I’m not a writer I’m going to sum up. We see Christ and Melissa splitting up as he went back to France to work on further cleaning up and spreading new hunter ideology “we protect those who can’t protect themselves”, Jackson working with other packs internationally to network safety and protection plans and help relocate supernatural after hunter problems (illusions to his comfy life with Ethan and happy overseas), mason and Liam staying intown starting their own careers (Liam opening a dinner and working with a new supernatural who came to town in the years – our new kitsune), Malia returning and working for Derek after spending time overseas and wanted to build a home in the one place she felt human, Lydia starting her own tech company with another illusion to Stiles traveling for FBI work, showing that he is not around a lot but they are, if not still together, still in each other’s lives,  Scott setting up his animal clinic and rescue along with our new friends, a couple of werewolves (the two we saw in the opening along with some background people we only need for the scene) that come in and out of the town that Scott takes in, some stay, some move on, but all of them are still pack (that’s the vibe we are going for), this would also go to explain that people like Hayden left and Cory might be out of town right now but are still around. This would also help explain our new kitsune as well as an introduction to characters that could connect to Eli. (it’s a movie let’s make the world feel bigger) Eli should be about a year younger or so and we don’t have to explain his parentage but can emphasize that his mother might have been one of those strays affected by either Kate or the Argents or a different hunter group, maybe someone Derek met between 4-6 instead of in the middle of 3a-3b. 

We go to the nemeton when Scott or Derek is talking to Deaton or the sheriff about how things have settled and stabilized (this could be like the scene with the fire and how Eli has stolen the jeep again or Scott has just done an animal rescue and is talking to Deaton post) and we see a hooded figure doing some kind of sacrificial ritual at the roots of the stump - we see a girl in the dirt - we see her eyes - Its Allison. 

Then we can cut to a similar scene of Argent coming back into town, a little time has passed we get a few scenes of Eli trying to fit in with the other high school kids and not doing great, the sheriff running things around town. We did all the set-up scenes and character introductions in the first third/half with the cutaways to something happening in the background. we have little hints that things have been going wrong or strange, a call from Isaac (not seen) to Chris about Allison, rumors Jackson is hearing about an Argent heir, the sheriff talking to Derek about Stiles comes up in a conversation about how it has been weirdly quiet, Lydia drawing or seeing something weird or arrow related, etc. 

The movie is now about finally ending the thing that started this all, hunter involvement, and the main issue is a confused Allison who doesn’t have her memories and was convinced by someone that the BH pack is the enemy and must be destroyed. We watch as the rest of the pack come together to figure out  - if she’s back - how she’s back - who brought her back, it’s calling back to early seasons 1 and 2 ‘who done it’ with a few twists when we find out Monroe is dead but was dabbling in something weird – this can be what Peter is here for. 

We get Chris reuniting with everyone and talking to Scott and Deaton about Allison, with illusions to Isaac still in France. We get Jackson back with more of a reason for being there with the noise he has been hearing as a legitimate reason to think hunters are moving again and the lost argent heir that brings him home. We get Peter being the best and a group of kids, Eli plus some of the other strays we saw in the beginning of the movie, being dragged into a war they all thought was long behind them if they were aware of it at all. (those be our New Teen Wolves) Derek is still a dad, but his kid isn’t scared of being a werewolf or shifting but more embarrassed he can’t shift because there are other slightly older, cooler supers in his life (2) and he can’t talk to his dad, the full shifter, about his problems so he is acting out. 

we can still have the group trying to find the nemeton again and we can still have interpersonal relationships, but we make the focus simpler and more human. We get Allison relearning who she is and who she was to all these different people while also setting up a new mystery for these new young wolves that their parents are trying to keep them away from. Allison relearning herself is slower and intercut with everyone not just Scott. The twist being that it really is kinda over, at least with Monroe, but that it’s never really over. That Harris was brought back as a test drive for Allison and instead used her to get his own revenge, and then we can end on that ominous plug for a new show that they were pushing. 

Idk this is all I’ve really got, I’m not a writer, but can you see it?!

I know it’s a little fanficy but 1 that’s what I’m doing and 2 so was the movie, OMG was it the most fanfic trope thing I’ve ever seen.

I feel like it’s something. It will never happen and hindsight is 20/20, we can’t play what-ifs. But if I could, I would have made this movie instead of what we got. 

Monroe’s last stand, bringing back people from the dead and manipulating them to do her work for her only for it to blow up in her face with Harris and Allison. The real end to the Argents as hunters with Allison coming back and fully embracing the new Beacon Hills and Scott. Relearning what the show was kind of trying to teach us even if it was doing a super poor job most of the time. 

Tell me I’m crazy, I want to hear your thoughts. 

I know this is nuts, but I had to write this out and send it into the void before it ate me up inside. 

OK… legit questions. how is there not an Ocean’s 11 Teen Wolf AU.

Like what the hell!! it writes itself…

The way I see it

Stiles - Ocean

Scott - Rusty

Liam- Linus

Issac - Frank

Erica or Allison depending on how you want to play it - Yen

Danny - Livingston

Lidia - basher

Peter Hale - Ruben

Deaton or the sheriff - Saul

Jackson and Milia/Allison/kira (however you want that energy to fly) - the brothers or in this case brother and sister

Get Bobby in there as the bruiser

and you got yourself a party

If you are wondering who we are robing, oh it’s the Agrgent’s baby

with Derek as our Julia Roberts and former husband of one Stiles.

you could mix it up a bit if you want to make it a Scott Allison fic or Kira fic but we all know Scott and Stiles are the big two.

I can’t write a heist but i will straight up pay someone for this!!