There is no moral.

The wolf eats you one day,

And until it does,

The forest is beautiful

[Neverafter - Brennan Lee Mulligan]

your kingdom honestly sucks. your princess replaced all of the knights with animated suits of armor :/

i stuck my hand inside the hollow suit of armour and it was wet in there

what's your problem

it was wet in there

you watch heated rivalry and you're like well i wish i could see the stakes more but sure it's men's sports and then you read anything at all about elite north american men's hockey in real life and it's like we have invented rituals of social pressure heretofore unseen to destroy young men's bodies and crush their personalities to dust. the worship of violence and conformity at all costs has wrought of this game a hell for generations. tickets available for tuesday

things in fic I'm used to people kind of faking their way through writing about:

things I have never before seen someone fake their way through writing about, until today:

I placed the bread in my french toaster, and set it to baguette

the benoit blanc movies show really beautifully how to write a queer character whose story is not centered around their queerness. it's shown that benoit blanc is gay married (to hugh grant!) it's shown that he participates in queer mediums like musical theater and fashion, but none of those things are ever explicitly remarked on. he doesn't have a big coming out scene because he doesn't need one; and the subtle details about him not speaking to his mother, the way he associates a church with homophobia, allows us to draw conclusions about how his family felt about his queerness without making that the sole conflict in his story. the conflict in benoit blanc's story is not that he exists in the world as a gay person, it's that he's always trying to wrangle a bunch of 30 somethings into not confessing to crimes they didn't commit

he's really having the time of his life 🥺 (insp)

ICE fucking abandoned the scene in a Minneapolis neighborhood and left their battle plans and designs on the city, fake license plates, and challenge tokens which they reward themselves for arrests. Looney Tunes shit.

"Demonstrators investigating the abandoned ICE vehicles apparently retrieved these “challenge coins” that ICE mercenaries receive when they kidnap people. This “coin” is decorated with a skull wearing a crown. ICE mercenaries serve king death."

hello whta the everloving fuck is this are ICE just cult members who believe themselves to be some kinda assassin creed shit?

It’s Nazi paraphernalia

Maria Skłodowska-Curie's notebooks are crazy once you think about it. They're so radioactive they have to be sealed in a lead box. Imagine a world where atomic theory is forgotten and a dude just goes "yea there's a book that details the secrets of the universe, the machinations of the creation of existence down to its barest essentials, but if you get close to it you fucking die. The more you read it the more your body slowly disassembles into mush." like wat excuse me

exiting a uquiz halfway through when it becomes clear the creator's narrow and immature world view and cultural knowledge leaves them totally unequipped to tell me which peanuts character i am with any degree of accuracy or insight

im addicted to learning because the right information can change your life

sometimes even save

A catagory 6 cunt quake in computer city has left my haters dead & shit

"I confessed, to the wrong priest" is my favorite line in Wake Up Dead Man, because it's so subtle and yet so kind. Martha has been so dismissive of Jud the whole movie. Not outright mean, of course, but she clearly saw him as a tenant who sometimes gave her a hand rather than a priest, and put him down when he seemed to overstep by acting like one. The line is an admission that not only Jud is a priest, he's a priest who does share the beliefs she's built herself over for decades. Even disillusioned by Wicks's self-serving hypocrisy, he still allows her to see her faith as a moral pillar. It's saying "I should have trusted you, and if I had, maybe none of this would have happened".

It's the "because you are a good nurse" of the movie.

you will have coworkers more incompetent than you could even dream of