I feel so conflicted about F-Zero 99.

Like, on the one hand, it’s a new F-Zero game. People seem to really love it, they say it’s super fun, and for the first time since the Game Cube F-Zero is actually relevant and people are talking about it. Those are only good things.

I’m so happy it’s good, and I’m so happy that new people are dipping their toe into the series.

…But.

On the other hand, I feel like the finger on the monkey’s paw curled. We FINALLY got a new F-Zero, Nintendo finally acknowledged the series. And it’s a battle Royal reimagining of the first game.

It’s like winning a lifetime supply of ice cream, but it’s only chocolate ice cream, and you’re allergic to chocolate.

I want to be excited about it, but I don’t really play battle royale games, and it’s definitely not what I was hoping to see from the series. A new entry or at least a remake of GX or something since Nintendo seems to be on a roll of remaking Game Cube games.

But I also don’t feel like I can be upset about it too much either, because the game is actually good and at least it’s something, right?

Am I alone on this?

Well, it is Fromsoft...

Do you think AC6 will have a poison swamp?

Like, I know it doesn't make sense for giant mechs to get poisoned, and Miyazaki is not the project lead. But it's Fromsoft.

I absolutely would not put it past them to just sneak one in there. Hell, Elden Ring had at least two, and a bunch of other areas you could at the very least call a dangerous swamp, if not poisonous. These guys really like swamps, apparently.

My knowledge of Armored Core as a whole is limited, but from my admittedly small amount of research I've certainly seen some wild combat environments. Like, Armored Core For Answer had you fighting in cities buried in the desert, skating across the ocean, and even on top of huge flying habitats. What we've seen of Rubicon 3 has also been pretty varied, if equally bleak.

I'm calling it now, there's gotta be at least one swamp level, poisonous or not.

Video Games are still GOOD! Just look a little closer!

I feel like everywhere I go I see people bemoaning how games aren't fun anymore, or getting stuck in a rage loop about how their favorite game series have been turned into cash farms by big AAAs who don't understand what video games are. And like, I get it. A lot of the big online Live service franchises have just turned to mush at this point, trying to squeeze every last penny out of you, and using psychological tricks to get you hooked so you keep coming back for more. And some of the big AAA single player games really feal like they're either recycling the same formula over and over, or chasing every trend they can find in a desperate bid for relevance. The games we love get drained of all the passion, artistry, and love that made us fall in love with them in the first place, replaced with monetization and mediocrity to squeeze our nostalgia for all it's worth. The devs make big promises, then fail to deliver over and over, and we get phoned in apology after phoned in apology.

It's exhausting, infuriating, downright unacceptable. I totally get why people get so bent out of shape about it. But, I also get really upset when people say things like "There are no good games anymore!"

Because... Listen. Listen, listen, listen.

There are still incredible, mind-blowing games coming out all the time. Games made with love, passion, and with creativity unrestrained by incompetent corporate leadership who don't know their butt from a hole in the ground. This year alone has been a MASSIVE year for videogames!

We got a Deadspace remake that was actually good, a 3D kirby game, TOTK, Pikmin 4, Like a Dragon Ishin, Final Fantasy 16, a remake of Metroid Prime of all things, Baldur's Gate 3 is tearing up the internet as we speak and breaking record after record, Street Fighter 6, the Resident Evil 4 remake, Hi-Fi Rush, the list goes on and on! And that's not even all of them! MORE are coming! Armored Core 6 is right around the corner and I CAN'T WAIT!

And that's not even mentioning the endless tide of incredible Indie games! There's so many! Indie devs have been goin NUTS this year. We got Dredge, a fishing horror game of all things, games like Psuedoreglia reminding everyone why 3D Platformers once ruled gaming, Warhammer Boltgun is just a solid boomer shooter especially if you're a 40k fan, Sons of the Forest, Wildfrost, Darkest Dungeon 2 finally came to steam, Dave the Diver somehow made being a fishing roguelike super engaging, Blasphemous 2 is almost here and it looks sick, and those are just the ones off the top of my head. So. Many. GAMES. just from this year!

If you're one of those people struggling with modern gaming, I understand. It's rough out there. But I'm begging you, please, please! Don't give up on video games! If you're sick of watching Activision Blizard spiral their beloved franchises into oblivion in a conflagration of short sighted greed, or seeing Ubisoft release the same handful of games over and over again with a different coat of paint, try expanding your horizons a bit.

Maybe experiment with some genres you've never tried, or try some old classics that you never got around to playing! Look into some Indie games, there's like a thousand videos on you tube shouting out tons of good ones, or just look at some reviews! There are so many games, of any genre you can imagine, and even some that defy genre altogether.

There are just too many good games out there to throw up your hands and say "Nope! I'm done!" After a bad experience.

PLANET NOT FOUND!

Holy crap I just had a revelation about Pikmin! The planet in Pikmin is called PNF 404. The planet is also notably uncharted, and not on any maps.

It just struck me why It's called that. That's not it's name. Olimar's ship computer didn't recognize the planet, it's unknown in it's databanks. It's not the name. IT'S AN ERROR MESSAGE.

PNF means Planet Not Found! it's a 404 error! And every time a new ship comes to PNF 404, they get the same message, so that's what everyone calls it!

Look, maybe I'm seeing connections where there aren't any. or maybe this is already common knowledge in the Fanbase. But I feel like I just unraveled some huge secret, and my mind is blown!

… It has suddenly occurred to me that there are an increasing number of eldritch horror themed indie games where you explore a strange ocean/ocean-esque body with terrors beyond comprehension just beneath the surface in a boat/boat esque vehicle.

Sunless Sea

Sunless Sky

A House of Many Doors

Dredge.

And those are just the ones I know about. Like, do I need to break out the Doofenschmirts nickel meme, or is this becoming its own sub-genre at this point?

Not that I’m complaining. I love that stuff. I’d honestly prefer more nautical eldritch exploration games over whatever new looter shooter, live service, always online garbage the industry barfs up next.

You know, for all their flaws, something I always appreciate about Nintendo is that they are dedicated to the idea of innovation, and making unique games.

Like, even if you aren’t a fan, you have to admit that no one makes games like Nintendo.

They set out to make a multiplayer online shooter, and instead of yet another first person military shooter, they make a game about squid people fighting over who painted the level more in a post apocalyptic hell scape.

Pikimin is a top down RTS game for consoles about tiny plant people trying to save astronauts, the Chibi Robo is an Open World adventure were you play as a little robot who befriends sentient toys and does chores and tries to prevent a dysfunctional family from falling apart, Metroid Prime is a first person shooter with a heavy focus on exploration and puzzle solving that tells a better story with no dialogue than Call of Duty has in the last 5 games combined.

The list goes on and on. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, Nintendo games are one of a kind. If they have any similar games, it’s because someone else saw what they did and emulated them. (For the record, I definitely am in the love ‘em, category, if you hadn’t already guessed. Lol.)

Nintendo doesn’t chase trends or fads, and they don’t try to piggyback off other peoples ideas, like so many others do. For the most part, Nintendo marches to the beat of their own drum.

Buuuuuuut… If you are a long time Nintendo fan, than you know that Nintendo’s dedication to innovation has a dark side. A frustrating, infuriating, nonsensical dark side…

There are two sides to it. The first is the less frustrating one, at least to me: Sometimes their ‘innovations’ are just dumb gimmicks that just get in the way.

Remember in the Wii era when Nintendo tried to force motion controls into literally everything? Remember the Wii U game pad? Remember when Mario Party switched to the car mechanic, completely defeating half the reason those games were fun? Remember LABO? Remember Remember the Virtual Boy? Remember when Nintendo got mad that no one liked the Wii U game pad, and made Star Fox Zero, a game that not only tried to force the game pad to be useful in a way that mostly just made it more annoying, but also pissed on the entire Star Fox fan base who had been patiently waiting for years for a new game after the already controversial Star Fox Command? Yeah.

Sometimes Nintendo gets it in their head that “new and innovative” is the same thing as “good.” It is not.

Sometimes Nintendo’s weird ideas flip the whole industry on it’s head, or give us an unforgettable experience we’ll cherish we’ll love forever. And sometimes they’re just dumb.

But that’s not the real dark side. No. The real problem with Nintendo’s obsession with progress and uniqueness, is how they treat their IPs.

When Nintendo gets bored of a franchise or can’t think of any new gimmicks to shove into it they just… Throw it away. Leave them to rot, who cares what the fans think?

If you are a long time Nintendo fan like myself, you know the pain I speak of.

F-Zero, Mother, Star Fox, the Mario & Luigi RPGs, Metroid, Wario Land, Pikmin, Advanced Wars, and that’s just a few of the IPs that have been shunned.

Metroid and Pikmin fans have been extremely lucky recently, they just got their wishes granted, the rest of us have to sit on our butts, praying in vain that Papa Nintendo will remember our favorite franchises exist in the next direct.

Pour one out for the Star Fox fans, the last game they got was sacrificed to try and salvage the doomed Wii U, and Star Fox Command was… Um… Well, let’s say as I said before, controversial.

The Mario & Luigi RPGs have been left to die alongside their developer, robbing the Mario franchise of one it’s best spin offs, and Paper Mario… Well, that’s a whole other can of worms. Hoo boy.

Then of course, there’s that infamous interview, where they asked Miyamoto when the next F-Zero game was coming, and he got all confused, like, “Why would you want a new F-Zero? There’s nothing new to do with it.” And every F-Zero fan collectively screamed “JUST GIVE IT ONLINE MULTIPLAYER!” But their screams went unheard, and unheeded.

Listen, I love Nintendo. They can be frustrating, old fashioned, stubborn, and wildly unpredictable, but I’m still a fan. The first video game device I owned was a Game Boy Color, and I’ve owned every Nintendo console since the 64. Their games hold a special place in my heart, even now that I’m older and have played and loved plenty of other games too. But that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna get pissed when they do stupid crap.

To end this rant, I’ll say this: For a company that is so reliant on their legacy, they are really, really bad at utilizing it. Do you have any idea the amount of money I would pay for an Earthbound Remake? Or the ability play game cube games on my Switch?

And on top of that, Nintendo has been taking a lot of risks and experimenting with their biggest IPs recently. Kirby just made the transition to a 3D platformer, Breath of the Wild has changed Zelda games forever,Pokemon Legends Arceus is the first Pokémon game in at least a decade to step toe outside of the established formula. And these are just a few examples. Heck, Pokémon Snap is back!

So many new and exciting directions for beloved series! And it’s clearly working, because the Switch just passed over 122 MILLION copies sold! Keep going Nintendo! Now is the time to go back and give some more IPs a fresh coat of paint and a new spin!

I just want to see Nintendo give that treatment to some of their benched IPs, throw their fans a bone. Do you know how bad I want a more story focused Star Fox game? Give it lore and world building and more character growth!

Or for Nintendo to acknowledge that Pokémon Colosseum existed, like, at all.