Does emotional damage count?

Expecting a hard split where everyone says either "I have never interacted with a horse in my whole life" or "Several of these, and other, darkly creative ways for a half tonne quadruped with metal feet and teeth like ivory snuffboxes to injure a soft little primate" and none of the middle options.

I can clearly remember the moment I first realised my mother and I were living on completely different planes of existence. I was 7 years old and I came home from my school's first track and field day having placed second or third in every event. the teachers had been making jokes all afternoon about how many times they had to call my name. my friends thought I was cool as shit. my enemies thought I was cool as shit too, come to think of it. I was proud as hell. so I get home with the entire front of my shirt covered in ribbons like I was a military dictator who'd awarded himself every medal, I walk into the kitchen and tell my mum all about my day, and she goes "oh, that must be disappointing not getting any firsts." and I'm like no?? first of all the first place ribbons are red and I don't like red. second of all look at me. there's literally nowhere left on my body for accolades. I am fucking Jacked of All Trades. how could this possibly be a disappointment.

@vocabulary-altering-posts I am fucking Jacked of All Trades

end of january affirmations

im not doing anything wrong and no one is mad at me

there must be a place for me in this world because here i am

my art doesnt suck

instagram is nothing to me

this has reduced me to tears

nobody asked but its very funny that this is the top post of all time in the adhd women subreddit

making a collection

Wait I have more

Winter has arrived on Poob.

Start your 7 day free trial of Poob today, and watch smash hit Martin Scorcese's Goncharov.

I just learned yesterday that watermelons could explode when overripe and then today one exploded in my kitchen. So I guess I'll never learn anything new ever again just to be safe.

Value Pack

take your time

funniest convo ever with a guy who said 2 me "nobody uses journalism degrees" and i said "my mom has a bachelors in journalism" and he smiled like knowingly and said "yeah, but what does she do?" and i said "she runs a newspaper and publishes romance novels on the side." and he literally said "oh" and nothing else. like he ended the whole conversation there.

i've just been informed he has a trombone degree. like the study of playing trombone. which is all well and good, i genuinely think we should all have the opportunity to chase our academic bliss but i do think the trombone studies guy should hesitate to judge the economic value of other people's degrees no

i love the tags on this post because there’s other music/instrument majors implying niche field-specific drama like “of course it was a trombone player 😒” and then there’s trombone majors like “this was NOT me for the record”

this supplemental DESTROYED me

ⓘ Tip: while sewing, you can unlock scary sewing by losing your needle somewhere on your bed.

HAPPY PUBLIC DOMAIN DAY TO TIN TIN SPECIFICALLY!!

It's not actually public domain yet

it's been incredibly freeing to realize that i'm entitled to never having to come up with anything original ever again because i already made cookie clicker and i can be satisfied with that. sorry this isn't meant to be relatable the rest of y'all still gotta try

"hey orteil you posted a joke but someone else already made that post like a month ago" don't care. popularized a game genre