i will reblog your whole blog, i have no shame

good night

brother’s friend’s kid came up to me and asked if I’ve ever played smash bros. nah never let’s play it on your switch little guy

The sillies

in bed straight up “bodying it” and by “it” haha lets just say. The pistol

guys it wasn’t that good of a post can we let it die now

haha, lets justr say. No

in bed straight up “bodying it” and by “it” haha lets just say. The pistol

NO MOONROT????? ITS ALL YAOISLOP????????????????

Saw a comment saying character X can't be a pervert because he's ace. Bro. Bro. Bro. BRO. BRO. BRO. BR

THIS

every time someone draws legundo thin it’s like a jumpscare. that man is barrel-chested and built like a brick and has a belly and is covered in body hair. this is a factttt we all know this

joining the war against gross kinks on the side of the gross kinks

D/s and Emotional Needs

This post is basically a transcript of a speech I give to newbies to the D/s scene all the time IRL. I figured it might be useful not only to people curious about kink IRL but also to smut writers here on the smut writing website.

For the purposes of this post, I am sending specific physical acts out of the room. Right now they don't matter, because you can meet an emotional need through any number of physical acts. So when I say that there are many ways to dom and many ways to sub, I am not referring to many kinds of physical acts. I mean that there are many emotional needs that doms and subs bring to scenes, and those can change the scene more than the choice of physical acts that will occur in that scene.

I say this to newbies to the scene because they tend to have a narrow view of the motivations and needs that bring people to D/s, biased by both the newbie's own preferences and the depictions of D/s they've seen in media. The same is true of people who write kink fic. Kink fic is very biased to a narrow subset of the wide range of emotional needs that people might bring to this kind of play.

It's really important to understand this in D/s IRL because a mismatch or miscommunication about these needs can lead to a bad scene. For example, let's take the approaches of sub-as-beloved-pet and sub-as-object. If a dom treats a sub as a beloved pet when what they really want is to be treated like an object, then a sub who went into a scene needing to be ignored, or at the very least the illusion of being ignored and disregarded, is suddenly in the spotlight of a lot of intense attention and affection. Again, I will note that both of these scenes could potentially involve the same physical acts, just approached differently. Let's say it's a service submission scene where the sub is naked and cleaning the room for the dom. Sub-as-beloved-pet would get frequent praise and lots of patiently repeated instructions, while sub-as-object would get one detailed instruction at the beginning and no reinforcement except a punishment if they get part of the instruction wrong.

I'm going to go through a bunch of different styles of dom and sub, with the emotional needs that underlie them. This list is not exhaustive. I'm sure there's more I haven't thought of or encountered, so feel free to reblog with additions. It may also be a bit dom-biased because I'm a dom, but I think that might be for the best, because the emotional needs of doms are generally less understood than those of subs.

Various consensual kinks discussed below. Kinkshamers in the notes will be blocked with extreme prejudice.

your tumblr avatar is who you are on the outside, and your discord avatar is your true self

on the outside I am an owl

On the inside, I am Athena

I have the same picture

Shark and gay cake

Shark and gay cake

On the outside, im a fox.

On the inside, im doomed yuri (gattwo tpot)

on the outside I am scum

on the inside i am nothing at all. not even a fully transparent png or a default pfp for when you dont put one in yourself. just nothing.

on the outside some cute bitch who is a hermit / arsonist

inside I’m someone who’s husband left her, then constantly told my son he was going to die, he married his childhood friend to get away from me, his childhood friend then killed him and was in denial of his death the entire time

On the outside I’m a little crying cat.

On the inside, I….. I guess I’m Dave Strider???