I am very tired so please enjoy!!!

YOU ARE COMING DOWN WITH ME

HAND IN UNLOVABLE HAND

if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills with my first two wishes, my third wish would be that sabrina carpenter would get gradually taller. she'd be in on it and think it was hilarious. we'd have a strong cap at 7 feet here, maybe an inch a week so people have time to theorize--let's not be ridiculous. but she'd still keep up the "ooh! im so little and small!" schtick. but shed be gradually getting taller. she'd be like 6'1" and still jumping for the microphone. and she'd never say anything about it. and if anyone asked shed act like she had no idea what they were talking about. and shed cheekily play into it a little bit but mostly still keep up the "ooh im so little and small" schtick. do you see my vision. do you get it

ok and so if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills in one wish i would do the sabrina carpenter thing second and third i would wish for all evidence of one random taylor swift song to disappear from the world once every month or so. taylor would have no memory of it. her fans would remember it and there would be an outcry over where it went (it's not even in concert videos anymore!) but taylor would have no memory of it

instead, all her brainspace spent on that song would be replaced with the vivid memories of roman gladiator, taylaurius velox. she's able to hide this at first, but her music begins to take on a gradually romaner and romaner tint. at first, people are like "damn, she's getting REALLY conservative, huh" and other people are like "wow, she's so deep, she knows what a rubicon is" but eventually travis kelce leaves her out of nowhere (he wasn't sure if dating someone possessed by a roman gladiator made him gay or not and anyway he was getting sick of being like "we're going to play the lions" and taylor being like "LIONS? WHERE?") and taylor publishes an entire brutus themed album about this betrayal and it's beginning to weird people out

and so eventually travis kelce is getting like, bomb threats sent to his family for leaving taylor and eventually he's like "okay, okay, i left her because she kept having all these vivid nightmares of gladatorial combat and she kept saying that football was giving her the ick because we never actually killed anybody for the glory of rome" and then he just gets more bomb threats because he left a struggling woman during a mental health crisis

and eventually taylor is writing music about her forbidden roman senator lover and her fanbase is either whittled WAY down or WAY up because people want to watch this trainwreck happen (or maybe she influences culture so hard that we're just all really into rome now) but she's being super cagey about the name of this roman senator. until. and now here's the twist:

weird al has been getting all of the same vivid memories of taylaurius velox. and he still has all his memories of her old songs. so he's writing all these detailed song parodies of taylor swift songs that don't exist anymore including specific details about their shared gladiatorial reality that taylor has never shared with anybody else. including that her lover's name was publius, and she's been calling him Poob for short

at this point a lot of original swifties are leaving. they could do the brutus stuff, but they really can't survive poob. taylor makes a clapping back at the haters song including the lyric "these bitches don't know publius" and it ends up all over all sorts of merch. there's a renewed archaeological interest in roman gladatorial combat

most importantly, the internet discourse is the best it's ever been. does this make taylor swift transmasc? is travis kelce problematic for leaving his fiancee while she gradually morphs into a roman gladiator? is this good queer representation? if taylaurius velox was a gay man, does that mean the gaylors were technically correct? is weird al morally wrong for capitalizing off of her music if she cant remember it anymore? was weird al sent by god to torment taylor swift?

anyway thats what id do if i met a genie

Folks I am so so fucking excited to announce this and I will talk about it again closer to the time but dragon from the hip is finished and as such I've made a video about it!!! I can't quite believe that I've managed this…

If I've timed this correctly, this should go live just as the video goes live. Go go go! Do a watch!!!

When AJ just dropped that his character has had multiple wives who have all died this way

The Plagueround - Animatic

It’s finally done! Weeks of work and school and slaving away but IT’S DONE! Absolutely love this campaign and I really really hope it garners more attention, as it is so clear how much love and attention has been put into it. Not to mention it’s just plain fun❤️

Absolutely love these cursed boys. I cannot wait for the finale, but I’m also kinda sad it’s ending, but I am so excited for their future campaigns!

Hope this was Hakuna Matata;)

Love and Guillotines

Group 5: @je-lurk @quin387 @bruisedbagel

For @sfth-improvised-fic

Chapter 1.

It was a beautiful day in Baker Street. Above the usual London grime, clouds chased each other merrily in a sky that one might almost call blue. 

As he crossed the road and opened the door to 221b, Watson was tempted almost to hum, or perhaps burst into a whistle - a gentle tease to his roommate, a man genius in all ways except that of knowing how to purse his lips just-so. Instead he simply readjusted this morning’s newspaper under his arm, anticipating the pleasant day ahead. 

Such idle dreams were shattered as Holmes barrelled straight into him on the stairway to their shared quarters. 

Plagueround HCs

My liege, if you recall, the prophecy stated that you would fall by the hands of your first born son. Yes, I understand that twelve daughters is a very impressive feat, but mayhaps you should consider quitting while you’re ahead?

My liege, you mustn’t be so reckless. If you recall, your prophecy stated “you shall not die by any efforts of man or woman, nor of any material from this land”, and it feels rather pertinent to your most recent decision. Please consider the situation with your father and your brother, and to a lesser extent your 32 younger sisters, and know your prophecy is not one to be neglected. Your father tempted fate and look where that got him. Yes my liege, I do know it was a heart attack that he passed from, but the royal guard directly saw your baby brother reach out towards your father with his hands as he passed. Yes, I know the prophecy would be better stated to say “beside the hand” rather than “by the hand”, I didn’t write the prophecy. No my liege, I mean no disrespect. Yes, I agree, this was a very inappropriate time to discuss your father, and we should go back to the issue at hand. Yes, I do recall that no man or woman may slay you, however, if you think about the prophecy with the context of your newly imported elephant,

My liege, this is hardly the appropriate attire for a hunting trip, especially one to the woods you were forbade from entering. Yes your majesty, I know you are ruler of this kingdom, but if you recall your prophecy- you mock me. I take your safety and fate with the upmost sincerity, and you respond with “mi mi mi mimi”? Please recall your- yes I know what your prophecy states, “your reign shall last until nature itself regains your throne and crown”, I was about to recount it for you. Look my liege, I think this hunting trip is a terrible idea. You are far too clumsy and the forest floor is uneven with roots! If the stairs of the palace or your own feet are enough to cause you to trip, remaining upright may be difficult, and, to put it frankly, falling hitting your head on a rock would hardly a glorious engraving on your tombstone. Please don’t wear the crown on this hunting trip, they’ll know you’re the new queen because of how similar you look to your sister. It’s a prideful act that will only- oh the royal messenger is here. What news do you have? Oh this requires my immediate attention. I will return, my liege. Do not attend that hunting trip in your current attire, though you should consider not going at all.

Royal To-Do List

Now, as a part of the induction protocols, all new employees are to be informed of a long-held family tradition. When each new ruler comes to power, they receive a letter a few days later from the old soothsayer. Yes, the one who lives in the woods, we paid for them to live there. Thought it would be a good way to avoid receiving more prophecies, as she wouldn’t receive notice of the coronation until afterwards, but now they just get sent in the mail. We used to add in 15 minutes leeway to the schedule for when the soothsayer interrupted the event, it was a nightmare to try and predict when they’d show up. If it were up to me, we’d stop the postal service going that far, but only the Queen can make that ruling. I’m getting sidetracked. As I recall, the Queen’s prophecy states “your heart will bleed when the man who could never love you distances himself, his aim not one intending to hurt you, yet he will be your demise”. In order to circumvent this, she is not allowed to take a hand in marriage, and any casual romances are monitored to ensure attraction is present from both parties. Furthermore, suitors are not informed of the Queen’s status as royalty, further preventing anyone attempting to woo her for wealth or political status. She’s also elected to take on many hobbies to fill her time, to focus less on any romantic endeavours. It’s a good system, if a little difficult to source new hobbies on short notice. Oh, yes, please voice your concerns. It’s always a good sign when new employees take the Queen’s prophecy seriously.

Well yes, this is why we hired you. She’s been interested in archery as a hobby recently, and we can’t exactly send somewhere accessible to the general public. What if she falls for someone outside of our control? No, it’s much safer to hire you as her private archery instructor. And I presume she’ll learn quickly, not every archery instructor considers himself an “arrow ace”.

My liege, I’ve been reviewing some of the royal funding and budgetary records, and a few things have come to my attention. Now, I understand that we have surplus funding in the royal vault as a result of your prophecy, which, if you recall, states that “you will die by a blade not intended for battle, but one that will find it’s way to you in a moment of joy”. I stand by it being a wise decision to keep you away from any activities such as woodworking or cooking, and that the money that would have gone into funding those activities was yours to allocate as you wished, but I suspect I’ve found some errors on the records. Firstly, we have two categories of payments going to the soothsayer; one for living expenses, and one, as I have just discovered, labeled “prophecies”. I suspect that- I beg your pardon my liege? We pay for the prophecies? Why on earth- We’re paying them to not deliver us prophecies, that’s why they live out on the far end of the woods. This doesn’t- Tradition? I understand it’s a tradition my liege, but if we are paying for it to be inconvenient to deliver prophecies, and then paying for the prophecies themselves- Is that why your sister wished to go to the soothsayer in person rather than wait for a letter? She was aware of this? And the rest of your sisters too? My liege, surely you see that it undermines our efforts in preventing prophecies to pay for them. At the very least, one of the payments should be discontinued to improve our financial status. You’re right my liege, this is a very complex discussion that requires more time to process, and I shall “shut up about the soothsayer” as you so eloquently put it. We will be discussing this later. The other issue I came to inquire about was that within the records for the entertainment budget, each performance is listed by name. I once again would like to reiterate that the extra funding for entertainment, while not aligning with my recommendations, is reasonable given the circumstances of your prophecy. However, once again with considerations to your prophecy, “Pablo the Knife-Juggler”,

My liege, I’m beginning to understand why you have called me to the castle rooftop. As your most trusted advisor, overseeing your actions and assisting with difficult choices is why I have been employed under your family for so long. However, one key aspect of my services that has remained fairly neglected by your sisters, and your father, is that of your prophecy. Often advice regarding your prophecies leads directly to the passing of the crown, and I believe this to be a critical moment in your rule. You had a much simpler prophecy than most of your sisters, but the vagueness that comes with that should really indicate where to place your trust in me, and the rooftop seems to be that very place. If you recall, your prophecy stated that “Pride shall be your downfall”, which- No my liege, I believe that you can do a kick-flip,

My liege, I am incredibly concerned about the prophecy you have received. Usually it takes a week or two to come in the mail, but not a day had passed since your coronation before the wax seal of the soothsayer arrived at the palace doors. I have spent the past few hours contemplating what should be implemented considering its slightly paradoxical nature. As you recall, your prophecy states that “in a time of unmatched uncertainty, the one you entrust the most shall betray you”. I have been the royal advisor for your family since your father’s rule, a well trusted and respected figure by many who came before you, and I shall do everything within my power to prevent a potential betrayal, regardless of how the prophecy speaks of me. As such, having worked for your father and under all of your sisters that ruled before you, I feel I have accumulated enough sick leave,

Thank you all for attending the all-staff meeting. We have several topics to discuss today, so we’ll begin post-haste. Firstly, I’d like to address the royal elephant in the room. We still have no idea where the royal elephant is, and may have to cut back on searching due to budget cuts, which leads us to our next point, the metaphorical elephant in the room. With our last Queen’s untimely death we’ve made significant progress on finding what was the cause of her death. Based on the fact she died at her one-year ruling anniversary banquet, and her prophecy, which if you all recall stated that “rended flesh for naught but greed shall end in rended flesh”, we believed that it likely something about the food killed her. We had checked for choking hazards and tested others for poison and had found no clues, so our thought process was that her body was unable to tolerate something resulting in her demise. This is where the budget cuts come into place.

We hired a mage.

Settle down. I understand this is a controversial decision, but the benefits have already begun to reveal themselves. While the mage is unable to detect ailments on a corpse, several of the princesses have all shared an ailment referred to as a “shellfish allergy”. While it is unclear what allergy means, it sounds detrimental, and the mage clarified that it is deadly if not handled. As lobster was served at that banquet, that is likely the culprit, and as such shall be removed from the palace’s future supply orders, preventing future queens from following her path. Staff members will be allowed access to the current stock until we run out, so I hope a nice lobster dinner will quell your fears.

Now, some of you have likely been worried about this decision in relation to the current Queen’s prophecy. We have made sure to screen this mage as thoroughly as possible, and have concluded that he is, in fact, a mage. Not a swindler nor soothsayer, not a wizard nor fae. We have determined his status as a mage. This is of great importance to us, as I would not like to be responsible for the passings of any more rulers. I will admit that taking a month off right at the start of a new reign was not my finest decision, but that’s not relevant at the moment. What is relevant is the new queen’s prophecy, which should be easy to recall given how short the letter was. As you should recall, the prophecy stated “Wizard’s curse”, but as this is not a Wizard, we have no cause for concern. Now, as a mage is very costly, the budgetary restrictions over the next month will be implemented across the following areas…

He lied on his resume

My liege, a letter has just arrived from the royal soothsayer. It is likely regarding your prophecy. I shall read it verbatim for you. *Ahem*. “You shall die underfoot of an animal trained for war.” Ah. It appears this letter was intended for your dearly departed sister. Had this letter arrived three days earlier, her rule may have lasted more than a week. It would have been very helpful in preventing her horse-riding accident. My apologies my liege, I know you were looking forward to hearing your prophecy, and I am truely sorry to disappoint. I shall alert you when it arrives. Thank you for your attention, you may return to caring for the royal hounds.

I would like to thank you all for attending this all staff meeting on such short notice. We are here to discuss the events regarding the passing of the most recent Queen. It appears I have neglected that horses are not the only animal trained for war, that animal related incidents may occur to more than one queen, and that the soothsayer is, in fact, a soothsayer. In related news, we have located the royal elephant.

monty.

monty who is ill from setting out into a cold, damp forest in the dead of night every 2 weeks, unable to put on warm clothes because he knows they’ll be ruined anyway

monty whose wolf senses carry over into his human form meaning he is near constantly overstimulated

monty who shaves his hair because he’s afraid of what he’ll see in the mirror if it gets too long

monty who listens to his grandma crying in her room late at night. it’s the last thing he hears before he falls asleep

OK so you know how animals can smell fear? Monty's wolf senses carrying over to his human form could cause so much angst :)

”when the wind doth blow…. too and fro….. you must get your shit together…… and fuck up them hoes” is the only piece of poetry that has ever truly touched my soul

im sorry mr mayo who gave you the right to be this pretty?

also why do you hold your pencil like that

Tiny paper king and his tiny paper friends

Okay, so here’s the updated plans for fighting against youtube's new ai age policy and privacy violating rule (I believe in us!)

Plan 1. Black out and leave youtube/ youtube boycott (August 13 to the point where the policy is gone)

It’s a very simple plan, but this time we just leave until it’s fully reversed. That way YouTube doesn’t just ignore us and the original black out. We have to stand our ground and show them we aren’t going to give up. We have to last as long as possible and let their revenue drain until they concede or someone else comes in and makes another platform (that isn’t based on politics but the same ideas as the original YouTube)

Plus I would like to add some small extra things that will help with the blackout though. That being mass downloading YouTube content. Now this might be the easiest thing for certain people, but it’s something.

Mass downloading YouTube content can help in case there a couple of videos or channels you want to watch during the blackout.

(I use something called a ytdlp but there might be better options for you out there, there might even be built in ones in a web browser or two, just search around the place, you'll find it eventually)

Forget what I said about alternatives that block YouTube, avoid anything that even remotely connects to YouTube. If it connects to YouTube it still provides traffic and helps it out, we want to disconnect from it completely, don’t let it have a drop of traffic

Plan 2. Bugging the crap out of them.

Now since they have a mail box for us to use, that can be used for our advantage here. So here’s what we do, send them letters asking them to reverse the decision, that way they will be overwhelmed by letters that have to eventually give up. Now I don't want you guys to send out slurs, curses or whatever. I need you guys to be kind and critical. I want you to point everything wrong with this and why it is destined to fail and leave the company crumbling

In addition to these letters, if at all possible, I want you guys to include photos of comments made by other people (Twitter, tumblr, whatever) criticizing this and making it known that it’s not just you guys who are angry, but people all over too.

Now we can also include emails in this, but that might be harder than excepted, but in case you do want to send in a email, you can send it that way

I can't find any other way of sending them an email, but good to you if you do find it (though I would recommend a letter much more)

UPDATE, someone has pointed out that we should all send out our letters on a single day, Im taking around August 5th about a week before the thing actually rolls out and than maybe we’ll do another batch on the 8th just in case

Make sure you mass send a bunch of letters

WIP plan 3, legal bull

I wish I could say this plan was finished, but unfortunately, it is not at all. All we have to go for here to filing a complaint towards the FTC about this and or using what this user recommneds (though I can't fully say if it'll work or not)

This plan will be worked on as much as possible

I want everyone if they can to spread to outside of tumblr, talk about it on twitter, facebook, blusky, youtube itself, this plan has to spread to as much people as possible.

I believe we can do our best and shine a light through these horrible times, we can be light in the darkness that will help others shine a burn a hole in this horrible system of censorship

I believe in every last one of you, I believe you can do good and spread good, because in your hearts, you are good

If you have any other ideas, let me know, cause i know more minds are better than one.

Good luck!

Update! We have a discord server now! We will be planning, spreading news and of course sharing ways to deal with YouTube’s ID policy