reblogged to save lives

i love seeing tendons move under my skin and being reminded im an awesome meat puppet #mypuppet

This is great.

I wanna fuck you like a centipede

Blogger's Note: Centipedes reproduce by the male leaving a spermatophore (sperm packet) on the ground for the female to pick up - no intercourse is involved.

daily affirmations:

i am kind

i am in control of my emotions

it does not bother me when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

everyone in the house has the right to be in the kitchen

i am kind and in control of my emotions even when someone is in the kitchen while i was planning to be in there alone

you know what. I think I should be allowed to temporarily turn into a seal and go swimming around in the ocean for a while. just submit a little note to work that says "sorry, I need to take some sick time, I am becoming a seal" and leave for a week

thanks to tumblr the phrase "loyal eunuch" has entered my vocabulary and is being applied egregiously. phone got lost in the bedsheets and I murmured, instinctively, beloved eunuch where arst thou?

out loud. to my fucking phone. you people did this to me

Well topologically or perhaps anatomically speaking

Ever since they got rid of the headphone port it’s more of a cloaca

i need a boyfriend. i need a girlfriend. i need to be single forever. i need a toxic situationship. i need a problematically older man to be homoerotically involved with. i need to have gay sex. i need no one to ever touch me ever again in any way. i need top surgery. i need a hug.

Nothing shuts down a bougie conversation like "well, when I was homeless—" Nothing. It's one and done. They are fucking taken out. The conversation is dead. Done.

"there's enough charities in place to help our homeless population"

Well I was turned away from every single one in the area because I was a non Christian trans person. Not that there were many I could make the walk to, to be fair.

"if someone is homeless, they can just forage for food! Probably eating healthier than we are har har har!"

I was homeless in winter. And yeah, sure, I knew how to use pine needles to make tea and boil bark but. Come on. You think every homeless person has that fucking knowledge or resources? And I was homeless on a mountain. What about people who are homeless in cities? What are they going to forage? Gravel? And what about areas where foraging is illegal? You want them to get arrested? In a police state like this?

"well as long as they don't get into trouble, there won't be trouble!"

You make laws criminalizing their existence. The "trouble" they make is surviving. I got the cops called on me because I went for a walk. I had a stick I was using to help me walk because I have a limp and couldn't afford a cane. A fucking white couple saw me and called the cops and told them I was walking "with a rifle" and was "very threatening". I got DAMNED lucky that a Light horseman found me first and told me what happened. Laughed a little. Told me not to worry about it, he'd call it in as bogus, and have a talk with the couple. But again. I was lucky. If that had been a state cop and not a rez one, I could have been fucking shot. For walking.

Honestly, if you are not for the liberation of homeless people, if you are not for decriminalizing homelessness and all aspects of it, if you say things like, "now I support those people, but I wish I didn't have to see it, because it makes me uncomfy," you have swallowed the propaganda pill. Congrats. You were not immune to it and now you are sick with it.

can we have tv dramas set in college please. fucking nothing happens in hs man. now im in college and my friend got chased by feral hogs a week ago in the woods and its like the 5th craziest thing to happen this week

if anyone is wondering how this happened:

its what she likes to do

God forbid women do anything

absolutely flabbergasting to see people who have so enthusiastically succumbed to despair. like okay denethor, but some of us are gonna actually face the armies of mordor in battle nonetheless.

The thing about Denethor is that he not only succumbed to despair, he wanted to ensure that Faramir succumbed with him. Similarly, a lot of people now are not only succumbing to despair, they're actively proselytizing despair, trying to convince others to join them in their hopelessness. Despair is apparently lonely and they want company in their self-immolation.

btw denethor succumbed to despair bc he was doomscrolling on the palantir. Sauron tweaked his algorithm so he only saw bad news, and he fell into the trap of thinking the world couldn't be saved.

what do we even post now that "if normal, start podcast" is out of date

your new podcast, presumably

the note was pretty clear about what our options are

for anyone else that forgot the fine details of the original

I think "slop" is a strong contender for world of the year 2025, as it seems to be universally recognizable as a description for the majority of output produced in the name of Return on Investment.

Sure it means algorithmically generative slop now, but look at housing construction, durable appliances, food, automobiles, you name it and tell me it's not just more slop. If enshittification is the process, slop is the result.

Merriam-Webster's got me.

I can't be the first to make this connection

y'all slept on the first chart but I will make the world see my vision

...Can I add this

somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

We often eat pie at work...for morale.

"As a treat" implies a special occasion, a temporary state. "For morale" makes the joy essential, because you have to have good morale to keep going.

There is no meme so domain-specific that I won't laugh at it. Give me train fandom memes about fucked up signal flags. Give me Beowulf scholarship memes about how to correctly translate "hwæt". The fact that I have no frame of reference is no obstacle to a sensible chuckle.