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Under Caffeinated, Over Stimulated

@scribblesandink / scribblesandink.tumblr.com

I am but a humble moron, grasping at the threads of my sanity and weaving them into stories that hold the last shred of my coherency

Introduction

Hello. My name is Scribbles (Or Sav), I go by They/Them pronouns. I write short stories and almost always have something in progress. All of my stories will be on my AO3, which I will link below.

This intro post is constantly being updated as I do more on this account 💜

I am a frequent shitposter so be prepared for some random 3am style thoughts, completely unfiltered from my brain straight to my laptop.

Feel free to ask questions, and I'm always open to taking requests if there is something specific anyone wants to see me write.

COMMISSIONS NOW OPEN!

DNI for any racism, sexism, ablism, or any attitude towards the LGBT+ community. I don't debate so don't bother; I respect your boundaries only when you respect mine.

This is a queer, mentally ill, and ND safe space, I don't discriminate so long as you aren't hurting anyone.

(Keep reading for more) VVV

I feel so insane about ai. I've had face-to-face conversations with people who use it for therapy, who use it to calculate the safety of pill interactions, who use it for all their emails and grant applications and legal documents and academic papers and finance sheets and for every single question they have about the world, and if you tell them about the ecological costs they just laugh and say "I guess I've used a lot of water." and I've been in multiple gatherings of 10+ people where I'm THE ONLY PERSON who doesn't use chatgpt. it's turning me into a ranting raving pariah, because how don't you people see??? why don't you understand??????? this bullshit didn't exist five years ago, you absolutely do not need it, and it is destroying everything

Little PSA for the people getting tarot reads:

If you don't like what the cards tell you, don't get all pissy at the person reading them. Don't tell them "You don't understand my situation". Like that's the whole damn point. You're getting unbiased input from a neutral perspective (the cards) and possibly another from the person reading them. If the cards tell you to pull your head out of your ass and stop blaming people for your problems, just do it. If the cards drawn don't resonate with you, then move on with your day. Say " I don't really relate to this message. Have a nice day". You didn't ask for someone to kiss your ass, you asked for the magic cards to lay it all out. Don't be a cunt

TWD Spoilers:

I wonder if when Carl got bit, spending his last day writing letters and spending the very limited time he had left he had with Judith, he ever thought back to Jim. Turning his face to the sun, feeling the breeze on his fevered skin. I wonder if it brought him peace that unlike the friend he lost so many years before, he didn't have to die alone. And, more than anything, he got to see the better world he was trying so desperately to heal beginning to take shape

Apollo and Hades' entire relationship was never fully realised and I'll always miss it.

It wasn't even in The Rising Son. It might've been scraped all together. But, it's a relationship I will always mourn. Because the concept of it is hilarious.

Here's this boy, who's in a hate-love relationship with his father. If the myths are canon, then his uncle who's the embodiment of "How are you doing, fellow kids?" meme also hates him. And, then there's his oldest uncle. Who is also in a love-hate relationship with his father. Who loves his aunt (the boy's, not the uncle's) that he (the boy, not the uncle) tried to marry.

This uncle also loves his wife. And, his weird pseudo son that is not his pseudo son at all or a son or a nephew or even family. But, he hangs around long enough for everyone to get used to him. So, he's always there.

Now, the boy HATES this kid. And, that's to conceal his love for this kid. Because, again, he's his uncle's pseudo kid who's not really his pseudo kid or family and it'd be weird crushing on him. Especially after the whole "crushing on the aunt" fiasco.

Now, this uncle's pseudo son, who's not really the uncle's pseudo son, gets invited to all the family parties and events because of...your brother. Who this pseudo-son-not-pseudo-son slept with. The issue there is that before sleeping with your brother, he was in a relationship with you. Your uncle knows this. All of it.

What he doesn't know is your side of the story. So, you're a villian to everybody.

But, you still need to vent and go to a bar sometimes. The easiest and most reliable one that won't draw too much attention is your uncle's bar. That he opened for his pseudo-son-not-pseudo-son, but that's a different story. So, you go there and you drink and complain. And, your uncle, who's pseudo-son-not-pseudo-son heart you've broken, is there. And, somehow, despite it all, he actually does listen to you. And, gives advice. Harsh advice, but advice. And, somehow, you feel better after going there.

Then, when it all goes to hell, you turn to your uncle for forgiveness. And, he gives it. In the form of a way to actually help.

And, somehow, it turns out okay.

between names

I carry girlhood in my marrow,

though no one can see it anymore.

It flickers in me like a ghost,

a soft dress folded at the back of the drawer

I will never wear again.

I know the weight of walking home at night,

keys sharp between my fingers,

the knot of fear braided into every step.

I know the sting of being looked at

and not seen,

of shrinking yourself into safety.

That knowledge does not leave me.

It lives in the dark of my chest

like an old bruise.

Now, when I speak,

the world calls me “man.”

And I am

I love the word,

the way it feels like arrival,

like finally setting down my bags.

But it also means

I cannot touch the sisterhood I once had.

I cannot enter the circle,

though I still remember the song.

I wish I could sit with them,

say: I know.

Say: I’ve bled too,

I’ve hidden too,

I’ve felt the world gnash its teeth

against my body the way you have.

But my voice is different now.

My shoulders have changed.

The door is closed.

I love being a boy,

but I grieve the girl I was,

because she would have belonged.

And in my longing,

I understand something terrible:

sisterhood is not just love,

it is survival.

And though I cannot stand inside it,

the fear, the hatred, the hunger

that forged it

lives in me still.

So I walk between—

a brother,

with a sister’s memory,

carrying her secrets in silence,

yearning,

yearning for the chorus

I can no longer sing.

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ashcamilaoo0

My latest commission piece for @scribblesandink She stands where the waves meet the gold fearless, fierce, and free. If anyone interested to commissioning me for this type of work i'm open for taking comms and offering some discounts.

YES!!!! I absolutely loved working with you on this project! You were absolutely lovely and SO patient with me!! I look forward to working with you on future projects💜💜💜

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