if you are reading this i want you to stop for a moment and imagine a crab

via

you know I couldn’t be a cowboy because I’d be stuck with my partner in the dead cold prairie night and our horses would be tied up and we’d be huddlin around a crudely made fire because it was too far to go back to the ranch and he’d play the sweetest song on his harmonica, the kind that you felt in your bones and your heart and that the hymns had nothin on, and then he’d finish and we’d both lean in a little too close and my hand would be on his bandanna and his whiskey-breath would be hot on my lips and I’d realize that maybe it wasn’t the touch of a woman i’d been hankerin for

yeah I’ll be honest I don’t know wtf possessed me here

Meanwhile Wade:

where's that "was anyone gonna tell me" meme when you need it because holy shit did the bird app just slap me in the face with this

(and yes, it's real and terrifying tbh)

"Such rains, which meteorologists are calling an extratropical storm, may change the course of the region's weather in months and years to come as the air retains more moisture"

CBS

boss makes a dollar I make a dime

flat top grill penis on company time

if you say so, tumblr user nutsacktorturer

im frying all of you on the penis griddle if you don't cut this shit out right now

I got inspired by this photograph someone accidentally took when their cat walked into the frame mid-shot ✧