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tired and clueless

@bambiraptorx / bambiraptorx.tumblr.com

Christian. A being of many hyperfixations, currently a turtle blog. Asks welcome!

It's about time I make a masterpost.

Fics:

Minor Interference--a ROTTMNT au where the turtles accept Draxum's offer of training, secretly planning to use the opportunity just to mess with him. Chaos and shenanigans ensue. But they've never been very good at sticking with plans, have they? (main tag, memes tag, lore tag)

Get Babied, Idiots--Draxum and Mikey attempt to take care of baby versions of the other three turtles. Originally a subplot of Minor Interference, now its own fic. (original concepts, main tag)

My Circus, My Turtles--a Draxum raises the turtle au. More or less focused on the turtles going through school. (main tag)

Body Horror Baby--post movie, Donnie accidentally makes himself a science baby. They're Krang. This will cause no issues whatsoever I'm sure. (main tag)

Other AUs:

Not Quite Hidden--Splinter decides to remain in the Hidden City to raise the turtles, hoping that his enemies won't find him. He and Draxum run into each other in a grocery store. (Poll based written story, original post, part 1)

I'm Not Dead Yet--Raphael Hamato, 28 years old, wakes up over a decade in the past, well before the Kraang invasion that killed him even begins. The catch? He doesn't know he died.

Giant Mutant Toddler Turtles--Draxum successfully mutated and kept all the turtles, but they don't know how to person yet. Featuring adult-sized turtles who can't walk on two legs or open doors.

Asks about any of these are very welcome!!

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Blind Vtuber Reacts to TOPH

I wish for this to go viral lol

Subtitles got cut off a bit at certain points so I’m adding a transcript at the bottom with descriptions for my DeafBlind friends or in case the video isn’t loading fast enough for your attention span.

spits a rise leatherhead concept at you, ive been working on this for a few months thats why theres a difference in art

he was always my fave other mutant so i wanted to put him in rise, he fights in the battle nexus (theres no way big mama doesnt start that back up, she still controls most of the underground) and the turtles meet him a bit after the movie (when raph is 18 or so leo 17 etc, i think leatherhead would be about 19 or so, still pretty young like them)

in this concept, leatherhead was one of draxums experiments right before he made the final adjustments to create the turtles (and before he had splinters dna). he doesnt heal as fast as them, and he has the same feral outbursts of anger he does in the other shows due to the mutagen still needing tweaks (and the collar big mama has on him makes them worse). singing is his true passion.

id be cool if raph and him could bond over being ashamed of having 'savage' outbursts sometimes, and if it makes mikey confront some of the more heinous and life ruining things draxum did to create them. also donnie finally gets a friend to geek out with abt tech. and leo also is here (hes kind of relishing in stealing from big mama again 'just like old times')

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I want to ride my bicycle, bicycle, bicycle I want to ride my bicycle I want to ride my bike I want to ride my bicycle I want to ride it where I like

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announcement for all sewergoers please dont go into the sewers tomorrow i heard they're putting really scary dudes in them now. and the scary dudes are all covered in dirty muck and goo. old+fat scary slime men in the sewers so don't go in there tomorrow especially don't go in if you're single

Those are my sons

day 82 of trying to tell Festive that my turtles live in the sewers and Festive cannot put their men down there, it will scare the turtles

“there’s no platonic explanation for this”

Well there is actually, they’re friends. They’re friends and they love each other and it doesn’t mean any less than if they were dating and they loved each other. They’re friends and that means devotion and affection and loyalty and love, and there is no point in which that love reaches a level that immediately indicates that their relationship must be romantic.

I went to a market recently that was absolutely swimming in appropriation of First Nations religious and cultural items.

I'm talkin white people selling rattles and dream catchers, white people banging First Nations style drums, white people teaching talking stick workshops, that kinda shit

So what do you do when you see this crap? How do you show your disapproval in a way that makes them give a shit?

I'll tell you what I do. The point is to show them that appropriating Indigenous cultures will lose them customers.

When I see fakey Native art I say something like "Oh wow, you make dreamcatchers! What nation are you from?" (Use tribe in the states)

I used to ask point blank if they were Native, but I'd nearly always get some Cherokee great grandmother bullshit, or even "I'm not sure, I could have some Native in me!"

Most of the time they don't know what I'm talking about, because they're not Native and don't know that this is a very normal thing to ask when meeting another Native.

When they ask me what I mean I say "I mean your tribe, which First Nation are you from?"

This is the point where they sheepishly mumble that they are not First Nations.

I let my face fall and say something like "Oh. That's disappointing" or "Wow. Unfortunate."

I let it get awkward. And then I leave, shaking my head in disapproval.

You may feel like you need to educate them on cultural appropriation but here's the thing: it's 2025. They know. Brenda the middle class reiki shaman is FULLY aware that her smudge fans are stolen culture. She doesn't care. The only way to make them care is to hit them where it hurts: the wallet.

Make them think that you would have purchased what they are selling if it was AUTHENTIC.

If you wanna go the extra mile send an email to the organizers, in your best white people voice, and tell them that you are disappointed that they are facilitating culture theft.

Go out and make Brenda uncomfortable!

not to be a snitch, but if this is happening in the US you can also straight up report Brenda for a fine up to $250k under the Indian Arts and Crafts Act.

To my fellow white people: this is not about it being an annoying way to "censor" the word and that isn't how it caught on or what it was for. Writing "ahh" instead of "ass" became a meme because it's supposed to sound like a "black guy accent."

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