Crimes

Faggotry

Psychic powers but im a rat

I’m a hedgehog

supernova?? lmfao i go boom fuck yall booooom

Insulting everyone

Beimg a funny insect with a whipped cream spray

cheese company idk

i need to know if i am the coat or all 12 of the toads

silliness

being doomed by the narrative i guess

fucking. uhm. pokemon evolution or something

oh….Op joke charterer :T

creeturing

Burger king

I CONTROL THE STARS, THE OCEANS, AND ONE SPECIFIC SPECIES OF BIRD

Controlling and destroying (sun) light with my hands

i can control any and all rocks

shit wait that’s a good one, i control the speed at which the earth moves

…alcohol????

Can break people’s organs

Twisted love or incredible mischaracterization lmao

HEAVENLY COOL STAR POWERS HELL YEAH

Thievery

Murder. But ✨✨bug✨✨

Beans. No context, just beans.

can turn into a fox i guess? or i’m just a fox, lol :D

i have the power to hit people with clarinets

I can summon 36 fellow alterhumans at will

I have the power to kiss the greek mythology hero Achilles I guess? A pretty good power imo.

uhh my name is jane and i can doodle

Unlimited supply of glitter glue, I think

ohhh this is going to be fun >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:] >:]

(what do opossums in trenchcoats usually do)

….

um. interesting.

oh uh

hi guys

my nam is oliver

my power is art

but

but it only works if I’m standing in a corner

hey guys i’m ALSO Oliver and my power is the ablilty to play things virtually.

…

or put things into video games. either way GOATED

Being able to transition memories/thoughts from my brain to yours, but only positive ones.

I guess I’m a dragon now. Made of purple crystal. Cool

im clearly a villain, that destroys worlds i guess ????

Spear guy! Who’s also skeleton themed I guess

I’ll miss turtles :( but hey– they’re all now cats so that’s cool ig

Ah I see I see.. so I can turn the teenage mutant ninja turtles into teenage mutant ninja cats… Wonderful… (Would prolly increase their stealth and speed tbh)

Wait a min wouldn’t that just turn them into warrior cats–

i can turn my hands into phones… 2!

I think we need to address the 'hero' part first before we get to powers

No one wants to admit it so I will. I think war sucks.

frapple approved

Who the fuck is this guy!!!!

evil pukicho approved

ATTENTION ALL GIRLS AND LADIES: if you walk from home, school, office or anywhere and you are alone and you come across a little boy crying holding a piece of paper with an address on it, DO NOT TAKE HIM THERE! take him straight to the police station for this is the new 'gang' way of rape. The incident is getting worse. Warn your families. Reblog this so this message can get accross to everyone.

PLEASE reblog this.

I have reblogged this about three times now and I will never not reblog it

i actually heard of this happening in atlanta not that long ago. that shit is terrifying as hell.

idc if it may ruin my blog look or whatever, if it means word gets out about these bastards then imma reblog x1000

reposting on my friends account

holy shit, that’s absolutely horrifying… definitely gonna reblog this shit, this could fucking save people’s lives.

Maybe this will be useful to some of my followers! 

Everyone should see this, it’s really important

I reblog every time

If you don’t reblog this you’re auto required to leave

I fucking told you, auto

dUDE

hOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS IS HORRIFYING PLEASE REBLOG

oh god oh god oh god

PLEASE REBLOG

I’M NOT EVEN JOKING

WTF

Stay alert ladies!

be warned

REBLOG!!!!!!!!!

HOLY SHIT! GUYS REBLOG THE FUCK OUTTA THIS!!!

I’m used to not rebloging anything ………..BUT HECK YEAH I’M REBLOGING THIS!!!!!!!

This is horrifying! Everyone please be careful!

!!!!!!!

STOP SCROLLING

PLEASE REBLOG

STOP SCROLLING

PLEASE REBLOG

HOLY CRAP!!! ALRIGHT ATTENTION TO THIS!! PLEASE REBLOG THIS!!! - THIS SHOULD ALSO BE A WARNING THEM GUYS!!! PLEASE!!!

This isn’t a big thing in England (that I’m aware of) but I’m still reblogging this because I have American mutuals and followers! Please please stay safe guys 

DON’T SCROLL PAST THIS!!!

PLEASE, PLEASE REBLOG THIS, THIS IS HORRIBLE AND IT NEEDS MORE ATTENTION

Please stay safe everyone｡:ﾟ(;´∩`;)ﾟ:｡

stop scrolling bitch 

reblog this dammit

!!!!

This shit is so fucking awful that I nearly broke my phone in the rage I felt–

If it saves someones life I’m down to REBLOG

REBLOG

REBLOG REBLOG REBLOG REBLOG REBLOG!!

ah sweet, man-made horrors well within my comprehension.

reblog or i will personally chop off your little toe or sth.

Hey, if you read this, you should probably be reblogging…

well ya gotta do it

What the hell is wrong with people…

REBLOG

Reblog this, not just the ladies!!!

REBLOG!!!

KEEP SAFE GIRLY POPS!!!

this is so disgusting

stay safe out there y'all

quit telling me to reblog so I can get to the button already!

Reblogged.

@ask-sora-aguilar @baileythebean @thesilliestofallqueers @rebootgrimm @bioexorcismss

@averagetmntfan @callme-adam-iguess @gravitytrips

Im not even being silly rn. Reblog this.

REBLOG THIS RIGHT NOW. YOU COULD SAVE A LIFE.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?!?!??

REBLOG

Agreed ik this has been happening alot where I’m staying this side

I’m gonna do this guys do it now

what the flip guys reblog this and please stay safe ❤️

why are there so many people with the anon circle? TwT

We, yes, WE are fucking that white boy

saw this under a post of someone from star trek and the OP of that post also made a sex joke, no I'm not including a screenshot fuck you

Oh my god they’re not including a screenshot because they’re evil holy shit

Exactly I totally was thinking of that

hey chat unrelated to any other posts

What would be weirder?

Im asking for a friend writing a ddlc inspired short story

wow!

A whole FOUR votes!

One of them being ME!

WOW!

Thank you everyone! I am so POPULAR!!!

We are the fun police offical. Fun is now illegal and you will be face jail time if caught having fun.

that's it

*blows you up with my mind*

We, yes, WE are fucking that white boy

saw this under a post of someone from star trek and the OP of that post also made a sex joke, no I'm not including a screenshot fuck you

A

Shocking how many people don’t know that hens lay non-fertilized eggs and think the yolk they’re eating is a baby chicken

once tried desperately to make my friend understand that yolks were not, like, a liquified potentiality of chicken, and she looked at me for a while and then said, "but they’re both yellow."

Behold

A chicken

[image: a lemon.]

Image descriptions that incidentally make the joke infinitely funnier.

It has no feathers, therefore it is a man

#making the joke worse

it is yellow and does not have fur, therefore a lemon is a chick

RAM should cost $1 and every AI-peddling CEO should be fed to a large Beast

Mr. Beast?

He is being fed to the Beast too

feed them to mr beast and than feed Mr beast to me

How do you think

did you know? th

Ralsei ate the fun fact 😔

Wait…am I popular? I know my first post got a horrific amount of notes and my sex one followed suite but am I like…do I appear in people’s feeds often? Do people actually know there’s a house offical?

My dumbass didn't see the url and thought 'HOLY SHIT DR HOUSE' and I don't even watch it

Unrelated: autocorrect changed house to housewives, Dr Housewives,

House MDeez nutz. Ha I’m so funny

Holy nuts that's nuts

Wait…am I popular? I know my first post got a horrific amount of notes and my sex one followed suite but am I like…do I appear in people’s feeds often? Do people actually know there’s a house offical?

My dumbass didn't see the url and thought 'HOLY SHIT DR HOUSE' and I don't even watch it

Unrelated: autocorrect changed house to housewives, Dr Housewives,

Hi! I'm Beth!

I'm 14!

My parents are @evil-journalism-offical and @evil-blahaj-offical

My other family is @journalism-offical @innocent-journalism-official and @fox-offical

I am female, and lesbian (obviously I'm lesbian, it's undoomed yuri)

Oh, and @sappho-offical is pretty cool too!

YAY MY YUEI IS NO DOONED

fuck you.

*dooms your Yuri*

I will find where you live and rip your fingernails off before covering everything in lemon juice and throwing clear Lego pieces on your floor

Sleep with one eye open bitch boy

:(