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yep just twitter kinda

@ithoughtthiswastwitterbutfr

also like have you read the darkest minds series like fr
she/her

christmas eve what about christmas adam

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kowka

happy christmas adam to all men’s rights activists

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forfuturereferenceonly

Please stop pestering us with things like this. This has nothing to do with men fighting for their rights. Eve is short for ‘evening’. Please don’t turn activism into a joke. Thanks.

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reindeerplaydate

Someone isn’t having a good christmas adam

Christmas Adam: December 23rd. Comes before Christmas Eve and is generally unsatisfying.

Happy Christmas Adam everyone

I am begging you. Please learn about stress/discomfort tolerance. Practice raising it. You need this to survive. If someone online can ruin your day with a throwaway comment, you desperately need to understand discomfort tolerance and consciously, systematically build that shit.

Also! Stress tolerance is such an important skill that having a learning disability in that area is a major symptom of a whole lot of other disabilities/mental illnesses! Struggling with it is a huge part of life! It sucks!

Am I saying everyone with misophonia needs to listen to chewing noises all day? No. But you need to find ways to tolerate it enough that you don't treat others like shit if they make a mouth noise near you.

No, you don't have to read the fic with your trigger tags. But you do need to be able to handle scrolling past the tags without being upset.

It is hard! But not having it also makes you so so so easy to manipulate. That grandma is racist AF because her mom raised her to be uncomfortable around black people and she never fought that discomfort. Trans people make so many cis people uncomfortable and that discomfort turns into bigotry real fast.

Letting your discomfort dictate your actions and beliefs about things is a great way to become a terrible person. Learn. Discomfort. Tolerance.

I'll say it again: other people do not owe you a perfectly curated experience of the world. Being a little uncomfortable sometimes is just the cost of like...existing in the world.

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stinson-png-deactivated20210103

“Girls want a Superman, but they walk past a Clark Kent every day”

You fuckin CLOWNS think you’re a CLARK KENT? Not on my fuckin watch. You dumb, headass motherfuckers are barely a Guy Gardner and you think you’re a CLARK KENT? The amount of disrespect is unreal.

Listen here, wannabes: My boi Clark is 240 lbs of PURE KANSAS BEEF trained from a young age by Ma Kent to Love and Respect women as the Intelligent, Independent beings they are.  He is shy rambling about tractors and casually moving the copy machine when my pen falls behind it and he would NEVER demand I be sexually or romantically interested just because he’s nice.

Y’all ain’t Clark Kent.

I have never hit the reblog button so damn fast.

“barely a Guy Gardner” is the sickest comics related burn I’ve heard to date. 

Can someone who understands psychology explain why this makes someone "rude"?

Phatic discourse, a subset of affiliative signaling.

When Co-workers do things like ask about weekend plans, chat about non-work topics, eat lunch in the same room, they are--subconsciously--reaffirming that they are part of a cooperative (or, minimally, non-antagonistic) social group.

The other primates cement social bonds by grooming each other; we do it by making small talk.

If they solicit your participation in these rituals, and you repeatedly refuse those bids, you are marking yourself out as, at best, an outsider to the group, and thus potentially antagonistic.

This is all happening on the monkey-brain level; they have no idea what they're doing or how they are interpreting your response, so there's no way to clear up the misunderstanding.

To the ape sleeping in your co-worker's DNA, either you are part of the grooming circle, or you are an outsider who, for all it knows, may be coming to steal all the bananas.

Even if you would prefer not to socialize with your co-workers, it's generally worth it to set aside 5 minutes a couple times a week for phatic communication. You don't have to answer your co-workers' affiliative signals every time, but it's less trouble in the long run if you respond to a few of them.

if you are the type of person who really just wants to be left alone to do their work in quiet: it is actually easier to achieve this as part of the in-group. when you enter a new space, in this case, a job, make it your GOAL to make everyone Know Who You Are. introduce yourself to everyone you meet. literally everyone. "hi I'm Jack I'm New." this helps burst the awkward bubble. you are now one of the monkeys.

at some point, either in response to an invitation, or just in the natural course of conversation, you can add in that you are a "quiet type" who "needs their silence" or what have you. customize to your personal needs. i find it helpful to imagine a well dressed elderly woman describing the sort of peace she needs to manifest.

roughly once a week if you see a group of people chatting, engage with them. keep it pleasant. it can be superficial. word will travel that you are Nice and Quiet and Not The Chatty Type protecting you from group lunches etc. if you have an office with a door that you keep closed a lot, putting up any kind of decor will also send positive signals.

humans are monkeys! for better or worse!

Pro tip: try to make a note (write it down if you have to) about some inconsequential thing that your coworker mentions so you can ask about it later. Kids and pets are great for This. As are hobbies. One guy in my office zoom called in from his house and I saw he had an arcade game in his office so I asked him about it later and he lit up like a Christmas tree. Another coworker has a pet pig and I ask every couple months how the pig is doing. This is a great strategy for pivoting conversation away from you and will make them think you are the friendliest monkey in the pod.

Im being so real here when I say that the biggest thing that changed how my coworkers treat me is just simply greeting them daily. I don't even know half of these people's names nor where they work, but just that little change made them treat me SO much different. Am I invested in any of their lives? Not particularly. But now interactions have changed from either ignoring me or having a vague sense of disdain (my team is practically invisible and as such we get blamed for a lot of shit we didn't do/couldn't do) towards me to most people I see in the mornings coming to say hi to me with a smile every time we see each other now

In university I was dealing with frequent panic attacks, insomnia, depression, ADHD, and a certain amount of selective muteness. I'm also faceblind, so I wasn't learning anyone's faces or names. I couldn’t stay late, because I needed 3 hours of silence before I could even THINK of sleeping. Couldn’t always talk, couldn’t make eye contact for more than a few seconds, and sometimes I didn’t even make it through class. And it was affecting how people acted around me.

Things that helped:

  • Turning my whole body towards people when they greeted me, and giving them my full attention
  • Using up the tiny bit of eye contact I could handle whenever I smiled, to maximize the effectiveness of both
  • Smiling and waving at people regularly whenever we were in contexts that made it clear they were classmates
  • When I couldn't talk, smiling and waving in response to greetings, even when was a bit abnormal to do so. When I couldn't make eye contact or smile, at least providing a little wave.
  • Rather than just turning down bonding opportunities individually, making it clear that I couldn't do that TYPE of activity, because people will respond more negatively to repeated rejections than to clear boundaries. Ie. "I'm sorry, I don't drink and go to bed REALLY early, so I can't go to the bar with you guys. If you ever go out to eat during the day, though, I'd love to come!"
  • (This was safe because they rarely went out to eat at lunch. Make sure you choose an alternative that matches the level of effort you're willing to put in!)
  • Letting people see behind the mask, a little, so that 'not talking' became part of 'Oh, Gecko's just a bit odd', rather than the only weird thing they knew about. Because one weird thing needs to be explained, and "They don't like us" is a tempting explanation. Enough weird things? That's an explanation in itself!
  • (If 'weird' isn't an attractive explanation, other good ones are 'family/my pets are my highest priority', 'really invested in a specific hobby/activity', or 'REALLY likes quiet'. The last one works best if you're okay with quietly sitting near people.)
  • Walking with people between classes if we were going the same way
  • Focusing on things that other people might not bother to. Ie. I made sure to learn proper pronunciations for non-English names, because a lot of people don't, and, anyways, it was easier for me to process-of-elimination match those names to their owners

Done right, all of this took up NO EXTRA TIME. I didn't have to stay late, or go anywhere off campus. It could all be done before and after class, or occasionally over lunch. It took up a bit of social energy, but less than worrying about the weird looks I was getting had. And people were EXCITED the rare times they had a bonding activity I could join in on!

So lately I’ve noticed all the different kinds of girls on tumblr. The ones that have the pictures with all the notes? These five types of girls are basically all the types of girls I see on my dash. Minus the nekked girls, but I didn’t really want to draw that so :T 

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thevoidfromwhichnosoundescapes

Keep your messaging simple:

“Trump fired everyone in charge of airplane safety, and a week later planes started crashing into each other.”

That’s it. That’s the messaging. Don’t get bogged down disputing Trump’s false claims. Just blame him, in short and repeatable sentences.

  • Trump removed bird safety regulations in his first term and now bird flu is killing so many laying hens that eggs are $5 a carton
  • Trump removed food safety standards his first term and now we have recalls every few weeks
  • Trump cut the subsidies for the solar farms under construction so now electricity costs more
  • Trump disbanded the pandemic response team and we now we have bird flu and tuberculosis outbreaks

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